User:Sonic80/oldnews
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May 2009[edit | edit source]
February 2009[edit | edit source]
January 2009[edit | edit source]
December 2008[edit | edit source]
- Cheney indicted of 67 counts of grand larceny of the jolliest extent
- Sarah Palin and Sherry Johnston to star in new movie, "Meet the Inlaws"
October 2008[edit | edit source]
- Bush weighs options for third member to the Axis of Evil
- Pessimist on Wall Street forgets to turn off oven
September 2008[edit | edit source]
- Greek oracle disgusted at America, years of destruction ahead
- McCain announces stance on troubling cookie shortage
- Riots break in Atlanta after Klan announces controversial candidate's support
- Hostages taken, Mickey Mouse refuses to negotiate
August 2008[edit | edit source]
- Greenpeace releases new line of Green Pieces to help spread vision of peace
- IOC announces 'lack of dope' in 2008 Olympics
- Spanish Olympic Basketball Team disqualified for being 'too asian'
July 2008[edit | edit source]
- Chuck Norris makes deal with AT&T to 'Crush the Competition'
- Josh Hamilton knocks satellite out of orbit during Home-run Derby 2008
- Day of No New News falls just short
- 'Kids should be allowed to smoke' says Governor Schwarzenegger
- Zimbabwe's Mugabe reunites Led Zeppelin, Robert Plant is not invited
- Developing and Underdeveloped Nations do not care about the environment
- Giambi's mustache to win World Series, 2008 season canceled
- George W. Bush and Japanese Prime Minister invent a new secret hand-shake
- Guitar Hero 4 to have 'smashable guitars'
- Video game characters are to blame for rising oil prices, New war on the horizon
- Chess piece makers oppose the creation of female bishops
June 2008[edit | edit source]
- World to be destroyed in August by powerful World Smasher
- Tomatoes receive chemical and biological weapons for use against humans
- Scientific Study shows UnNews is better than the Onion
- Man fired from substitute teacher job for having 'Girlie Parts'
- Obama wins Democratic nomination, Clinton pushes forward with campaign