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Today's featured article (new every day) Biffy Clyro is a Scottish rock band from Scotland. As well as being Scottish, nobody outside of the rainy isles has heard of them. The band is composed of one Scottish guy, and two other Scottish guys who are for some reason twins, even though they look nothing alike. During concerts, the trio are joined by musicians Mike Vennart and Dick "99% of Gamblers Quit Before They Win it Big" Ingram. Currently signed to 14th Floor Records, they have released at least six albums. Following the first three, their maybe-existent fan base grew to slightly larger numbers. As for who they actually are, I'm still not sure. I'm pretty sure they're a band, however. As well as being from Scotland, they are apparently very popular in the UK, which is not a place I've visited. As for their music... I'm not sure that exists either. (Full article...) Recently featured: Biffy Clyro Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Conspiracy Theory Generator Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... ... that cabbages are not to be trifled with? (Pictured) ... that a bird in the hand is better than crabs in your bush? ... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around? ... that I'd rather be a hammer than a nail? ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty? ... that the universe is made up of protons, electrons, neutrons and morons? ... that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles? ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell? ... that you can meet all sorts of interesting people when you're drunk? (Pictured) ... that on average, humans have less than 2 legs? ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services? ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you? ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that when it says "Do not try at home", it actually means "Do not try this at all"? ... that Robert Shaw won the Northeast Regional Dogfishing Open in 1974, the first sporting event to be broadcast on the new ESPN network? ... that Ram Ranch really rocks? ... that cabbages are not to be trifled with? (Pictured) ... that a bird in the hand is better than crabs in your bush? ... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around? ... that I'd rather be a hammer than a nail? ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty? ... that the universe is made up of protons, electrons, neutrons and morons? ... that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles? ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell? ... that you can meet all sorts of interesting people when you're drunk? (Pictured) ... that on average, humans have less than 2 legs? ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services? ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you? ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that when it says "Do not try at home", it actually means "Do not try this at all"? ... that Robert Shaw won the Northeast Regional Dogfishing Open in 1974, the first sporting event to be broadcast on the new ESPN network? ... that Ram Ranch really rocks? ... that cabbages are not to be trifled with? (Pictured) ... that a bird in the hand is better than crabs in your bush? ... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around? ... that I'd rather be a hammer than a nail? ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty? ... that the universe is made up of protons, electrons, neutrons and morons? ... that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles? ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?	In the news Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize (Pictured) Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Privacy-infringing Nanny state officials enforcing social media bans and digital ID to "protect the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Files • War Special Combat Operation in Iran • Winter Paralympics • Saturn Awards Recent deaths: Warner Bros. bidding war • Neil Sedaka • Ali Khamenei • Team Italy sled hockey • Miami Dolphins • That guy from Boston. The band, not the city. But isn't the band from the city? Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • Weed • Dancin' Maduro • Iran • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons On this day... March 10: Opposite Day 1810 - For opposite day, Napoleon Bonaparte decides to wear stilts or something I don't know. 1922 - Gandhi, in a fit of anger, nukes the peaceful country of East Volta. You've never heard of East Volta? Exactly. 1952 - Cuban dictator Fulgencio Batista decides to celebrate opposite day by taking the land and wealth from the poor instead of the rich. 1977 - Astronomers discover the rings of Uranus, they of course keep their cool since they pronounce it "Urine-us" like a bunch of nerds. Still sounds like pee though. 1994 - O.J. Simpson makes history, becomes the first African-American man to get away with the murder of a rich white woman, signalling monumental progress for people of color who also happen to be filthy rich. 2011 - Tiny politically unstable oil-rich Middle Eastern country drone strikes a wedding in Tulsa, Oklahoma. 2020 - Donald Trump blacks out his Twitter page for BLM.
Today's featured picture The 1997 film Tombstone Kops, one of many Hollywood movies based on the historic events surrounding the now infamous Bunfight at the OK Corrall, is considered by many to be the nadir of Slapstick Movies. Image credit: Mhaille View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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