Babel:Spam

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CHeaP Original SoftWare McDonald's is a chain of restaurants that serves "fusty food". Their menu includes hamburgers, french fries (Put mayo on mine, please!), chicken, milkshakes, and other marvelous synthetic products of dubious ingredients. Recently, after protests by flat-earthers, McDonald's has added "healthy food" such as salads and fruits. Extensive testing and reformulation successfully made them as greasy and bad for the body as the rest of the menu. McDonald's has locations all over the world, and is coming soon to the rest of the universe. There is no place without a McDonald's there, or at least nearby; they have become as common as air pollution and the girl next door. The chain's strategy is to achieve a single monopoly where people have no choice but to eat every meal there. Corporate training consists of re-running the movie WALL-E. (Full article...) Recently featured: McDonald's Jeffrey Epstein UnNews:James Dean named Sexiest Man Dead Climate change Archive · Vote for featured articles · Send This mail to 1000000 contacts, or the universe will explode. Send this mail to 999999 contacts edit Special Offerts!! March 27: Typhoid Mary Day 1513 - Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de León searches Florida for the Fountain of Youth, finds a Marshalls next to a Randalls next to another Marshalls. 1915 - Mary Mallon, nicknamed Typhoid Mary since her name is Mary and she gives people Typhoid, is detained by the authorities after killing like fifty people. 1921 - Activists from the group "Justice for Mary Mallon" die of typhoid after Mary prepares them all a lovely Peach Melba. (Pictured) 1998 - The head of the FDA recommends that men suffering from premature ejaculation just "think about your dad." 1999 - A Lockheed F-117 Nighthawk is shot down over Serbia by a Slav wielding an evil glare. 2014 - The Moro Islamic Liberation Front agrees to ceasefire with Philippines government while they figure out what's so fucking hilarious about their name. Featured Cheap Items!	edit News on cheap electronic deviceS!!:. Britney Spears is a Red. Hannity column: Britney Spears is a fucking commie (Pictured) U.S. to foreign actor Gerard Depardieu: "Stay out of our elections" Avoid the coronavirus: tips for readers K-pop supports BTS XFL to launch franchises in pissed off markets The Who plan to lower insulin prices Yang a "coronavirus carrier," says Trump Trump butchers Franz Ferdinand hit Internet troll scores major win with stunning display of statesmanship Hannity scrambles to intervew Levi Parnas Pansexual announces she is Liberal Democrat Black Panther director on Gilliam's Brazil: "WTF?!" Trump tweets: "impeach the pres" Trump impeached, Christmas cancelled BUY THIS AT BUYBUYBUY.COM edit This is a great teaching from your doctor. From Uncyclopedia's playwrights: ... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws? GET MORE INFORMATION
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YOU ARE THE 100000!! VISITOR OF THIS PAGE!!! YOU WON!! HERE ARE ANOTHER WINENRS Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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