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Wednesday, February 19, 2020, 16:49 (UTC)
The Who unveils plan to lower insulin prices
UnNews:The Who unveils plan to lower insulin prices
LONDON, England -- No one knows what it's like to be the bad man, to be the sad man, quite like The Who. The legendary rock band is well aware that insulin is too expensive, and you'd have to be some rich pompous ass to afford it nowadays. But Roger Daltrey and Pete Townshend have a plan to lower the cost.

In November, the "My Generation" hit-makers launched a pilot program to boost the availability of insulin worldwide. The idea is to work with manufacturers to increase the global supply — and, in doing so, hopefully drive down the price tag. Since then, seven big pharma's have shown interest in the program.

"I mean, you know, Pete, diabetes is becoming more widespread, the amount of insulin available is pathetically low, prices are too bloody high, so, you know, Pete and I had to do something," Daltrey said.

Yang "a coronavirus carrier," says Trump
UnNews:Yang "a coronavirus carrier," says Trump
WASHINGTON -- Impeached President Donald Trump claims that former Democratic hopeful Andrew Yang, who dropped out of the race shortly before Tuesday's New Hampshire primary, is infected with the coronavirus, the latest trendy fad disease that no one will remember in five years. "He's got it bad," Trump tweeted, "he's hot for teacher. He needs to go back to China so they can cure him. Unforchinately (sic) China banned the letter N."
Camile Sesto
UnNews:Camile Sesto
HOLLYWOOD, CA — More than four months after Camilo Sesto's not completely unexpected death, Spanish-speaking music fans everywhere are left dumbfounded over a curious error in a memorial slideshow that was shown at this year's Grammy awards. It seems that someone, perhaps under the impression that it was okay to drink at work, had overlooked a typo that rendered his name as "Camile Sesto". All over Twitter and Instagram, people's reactions have gone so far as to claim that this was a grievous offense: "they don't care about Spanish or Latin talent at all!" Beloved YouTuber Boogie Tyme, famously bad with names, weighed in with his opinion: "I love Caramelo Santos! I'm just glad I'm not the only one here who can't spell his name. No hablo español!"

Trump butchers Franz Ferdinand hit
UnNews:Trump butchers Franz Ferdinand hit
WASHINGTON -- During Karaoke Night at the White House Friday, impeached President Donald Trump, who had already been singing off-key all night, launched into a 2004 hit by garage rockers Franz Ferdinand. But one line change during the chorus stunned the audience -- and the karaoke machine -- into a 20-minute silence. During "Take Me Out," Trump sang (emphasis ours): "I say, don't you know? You say you don't know. I say: take her out!"
Internet forum contributor lauded for insightful commentary
UnNews:Internet forum contributor lauded for insightful commentary
THE WORLD WIDE INTERWEB: Just a few days ago, an otherwise unnotable person posted a surprisingly insightful one-line comment on Liberty Eagle Forums, a relatively popular online venue for reasoned and structured discussion of contemporary political issues. It is true that Liberty Eagle Forums, just like many other websites which provide a means for free expression by private individuals, has had its fair share of heated arguments (if not outright emotional displays) concerning the disparate and frankly controversial viewpoints of its various proponents. Such is the nature of human-to-human interaction. However, one particular posting (by a participant who has chosen to be identified by the unassuming nickname "FurBallKitty") caught just about everybody off-guard for its inherent clearness and sagacity, which successfully elevated the entire train of discourse onto a new plane of mutual respect for those of divergent opinions.

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