Babel:1337

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
W31(0m3 70 Un(y(10p3di@,
7|-|3 c0n73n7-fr33 3n(y(10p3di@ 7|-|47 4ny0n3 (@n 3di7.
36,618 @r7ic135 in 3ng1i5|-|

B3GINN3R'5 GUID3 · 7|-|3 BIG FI\/3 · 57Y13 · QU357I0N5 · |-|31P · D0N47I0N5

C473G0RI35 · F347UR3D C0N73N7 · 4-Z IND3X

Potted pot bonsai.png

Ah, hello, hello, do come in. I have, of course, been expecting you; I have a most pressing concern which simply must be addressed.

I need more plants, you see. I mean, sure, I have a few already, but only a few; as you can clearly tell, that's not nearly enough. There is still counter space left, and windowsill space, and most especially floor space, which just will not do. No, it won't do at all, and that's why you're here, I presume? After all, why else would you be here, especially after the ad I put out? Need someone to help with a plant problem, it said, and here you are, to help with the plant problem. It's all quite perfect, working out rather dandily already.

And don't you worry; I do fully intend to compensate you for your troubles. I did say I would, didn't I? Otherwise why would you be here, and you did come all this way. Yes, this is all going to work out quite nicely. I can feel it in my bones: the plants are going to like you. So let's get to it, shall we? (Full article...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured.png

Extension:DynamicPageList (DPL), version 3.3.3: Warning: No results.

Extension:DynamicPageList (DPL), version 3.3.3: Warning: No results.

DID Y0U KN0W...

I burning your dog real.jpg

IN 7H3 N3W5

Biden turkey pardon 2021.png
Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Joleeeene...

0N 7HI5 D4Y...

November 24: Pete Best's Birthday (UK)
The remaining Beatles slowly step away from Pete Best.
  • 1941 - Pete Best is kicked out of mother's womb. Mother auditions George Best as possible replacement in the family.
  • 1955 - Learns to play drums. Snares, bass and drumsticks go off and socialize with one another, leaving Best out.
  • 1962 - George stares icily at Best during a performance; Paul kicks his drum set during rehearsal; John hires Epstein solely to fire Best.
  • 1962 - Best kicked out of the Beatles, house, and UK. Elizabeth II says her kingdom "wants to go in a new direction."
  • 1970 - John, Paul, George and Ringo join Best in the "Ex-Beatles" group.
  • 2012 - Best celebrates 50th anniversary of Love Me Do release.

70D4Y'5 F347UR3D PIC7UR3

Nuke Me if you can
Now showing at all good Middle-Eastern warzones near you!

Image credit: Olipro
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

R3C3N7 4R7IC135

M0R3 R3C3N7 4R7IC135 | M057 W4N73D P4G35 | R3QU3573D R3WRI735 | 4DD 70 57UB5 | 10N31Y P4G35 | P33 R3\/I3W | 7RY WRI7ING 4B0U7... | 57UCK 4R7IC135 N33DING 4 PU5|-| | GR347 ID345

WRI73R 4ND N00B 0F 7H3 M0N7H

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You have less than a week, just 6 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 36,618 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Pig Latin!


Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.     

PR073C73D BY 7|-|3 F4IR U53 C14U53, 4ND 4 1337 C14N 0F C1INJ45.

Potatohead aqua.png

Featured Article  (read another featured article)
Featured version: 1 April 2008
This article has been featured on the front page. — You can nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.

Template:FA/01 April 2008Template:FA/2008Template:FQ/01 April 2008Template:FQ/2008