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Mathematics (from Greek άθημα máthēma, “knowledge, study, learning”) is the systematic torture of students disguised as the study of quantity, structure, space, and change. Mathematicians seek out patterns and formulate new conjectures, trying to make sense of the universe by examining these abstract concepts, determining common traits, and then experimenting to see if this advanced knowledge will help them get women into bed. These conjectures are often faulty, and this subsequent failure is referred to as mathematical proof.
Galileo Galilei (1564–1642) said, "The universe cannot be read until we have learned the language and become familiar with the characters in which it is written. It is written in mathematical language... Without these, one is wandering about in a dark labyrinth". He was also condemned by the church for heresy, and the only surviving body part of his is his middle finger on his right hand. This is currently kept at the Museo Galileo in Florence, Italy, allowing him to give the finger to the Catholic Church from beyond the grave. (Full article...)
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Did you know...
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| *... That Hanukkah is the festivle of lights, and has been celebrated by kids for the same reason for several thousand years?
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- ... that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
- ... that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
- ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... the muffin man?
- ... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
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- ... that Stan Lee originally conceived the X-Men as a group of post-op transgenders?
- ... that The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
- ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
- ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
- ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
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- ... that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
- ... that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
- ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... the muffin man?
- ... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
|
- ... that Stan Lee originally conceived the X-Men as a group of post-op transgenders?
- ... that The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
- ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
- ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
- ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
|
- ... that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
- ... that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
- ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... the muffin man?
- ... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
|
- ... that Stan Lee originally conceived the X-Men as a group of post-op transgenders?
- ... that The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
- ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
- ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
- ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)?
- ... that Uncyclopedia regularly kills its editors mid-sent
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
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In the news
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Chuck Norris didn't die, Death got Chuck Norris'd.
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On this day...
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