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Because of their incurable biases, the so-called experts at Wikipedia will probably never have an article about Page with no links. We are sorry they insist on being this lame.
“I can't get out!”
~ Captain Obvious on the page with no links
“Hey whoever you are, come over here and help me with my computer - my damn browser is broken again!”
~ Your grandma on the page with no links
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Elton John - Linkless.ogg (file info)
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A short song about the emptiness and existential void that linklessness may lead to.
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Annoying as it may seem, there is no Link here, as the image demonstrates. Ganondorf is clearly behind it.
Main Page
This is a page with no links. Unlike the Page full of links, this is a waste of time for Uncyclopedia and should be deleted. However, since this has absolutely no links, there is no way to go anywhere on this page. If you're lucky, you might find one link on Wikipedia. This is nothing but a poor parody of those pages, as Wikipedia is a poor parody of Uncyclopedia full of bad jokes and useless misinformation.[citation needed] This page is supposed to not have any links or pictures on purpose. This article is just wasting your time reading looking for a link but that's what Wikipedia does. For a link, either look in Legend of Zelda, or just type something else.
If it looks like there are links here, it's only because fake links like this one have been implanted into the article just to annoy and confuse the reader. In truth, there are no real links here, only fake ones. There used to be real links here, but then all but one were eaten by grues, a fate that sadly befalls many other things around here. The only link that remained disappeared, and can not be found. This is not a real page. All Your Base Are Belong To Us. You are on your way to linklessness.
"I have found links! Check the top and bottom of the page." - A helpful voice
Contents [hide]
- 1 History
- 2 Math formulas discussing it
- 3 Disclaimer
- 4 In conclusion
- 5 This is so annoying - what's the point of all this?!
- 6 Ah fuck you for playing this kind of sh*t - just give me a YouTube video or something to watch, anything but this crap!!!
- 7 Help!!! There's nowhere to go! I want out of this madhouse! AAAAAAAAA!
- 8 See also
- 9 External links
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History
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Leonardo da Vinci just invented Uncyclopedia at the dawn of time. But unlike Morgan Freeman, he is not God. When the dinosaurs went extinct, a smell from their corpses made the cave-men and guinea pigs go insane and posted a lame version of Uncyclopedia called Wikipedia filled with lies and half truths. However the Martians were not affected, so they kept making Uncyclopedia powered by Extreme Sarcasm and Jesus Juice (thank you Michael). And they lived happily ever after in linkless bliss and played "Seven Tears" by Goombay Dance Band until they all turned gay. The end. Alright, that story sucked like a vacuum cleaner, but what else did you expect from a page consisting mostly of annoying fake links? It's not like we're writing a Shakespearean drama here...
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Math formulas discussing it
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There is a simple formula that demonstrates the non-locality inherent in the microcosm and undermines the true nature of the uncertainty principle. This is used to determine the average cave man's mind when doing a page like this (all of them). He is brain dead, however he thinks that he could do the page on Uncyclopedia. This article would provide a link, but...
...but this, however, is a Link, but since it's a Red Link, it's not against the rules to have it here.
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Disclaimer
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Whatever you do, you must not click on the link saying "What links here" on the menu to the left. Doing so will cause a paradox which will lead to irreversible damage in the fabric of the space-time continuum, resulting in a universal Blue Screen of Death from which there is no escape. Of course, you will probably still click on it since you're too stupid to heed this warning, but then it will be your fault that the universe collapsed into itself. Oh no - you clicked it! What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO?! You idiot! Look - a gigantic black hole is already growing with a geometric rate in the center of the Milky Way; the black hole which will engulf the entire universe in a cataclysmic implosion within less than six weeks, and it's all your fault! Damn - why did you have to click on "What links here"?! You could have just left it alone, you blundering miscreant! But no - you HAD to click on it, and now we're all doomed because of it!
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In conclusion
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In conclusion to this very informative warning page, you mustn't ever go to Wikipedia, for there death awaits you. This page is just a warning and should not be edited or tampered with in any way. If you do, then this would look like a warning to the informative Uncyclopedia which has educated the masses ever since Leonardo da Vinci invented it. I hope you will not tell anyone on Wikipedia about this page unless they go to Mars. Guess what, this may be a way out (or not).
Once again, Link refuses to remain at his duty, which is to provide us with the only actual link in this article (which will never happen of course). Leaving poor Zelda heartbroken and his shield and sword suspended in mid air and all... what a wimp.
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This is so annoying - what's the point of all this?!
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There is no point to it. You should have been able to deduce from the very page title what was coming. Just because you couldn't, you fail at life.
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Ah fuck you for playing this kind of sh*t - just give me a YouTube video or something to watch, anything but this crap!!!
Main Page
As you wish:
No seriously, what else did you expect? This IS the page with NO LINKS. For YouTube videos, go to just about any other article than this one, moron.
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You guys are so annoying, I hate this website, it's the worst ever! HATE HAET HAT
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Wow, so you only just now realised that Uncyclopedia is the worst? Well, congratu-fucking-lations for finally figuring out what the general public has already known for years. We might give you a real actual link as a reward, but it looks like all we have left is a blackened banana peel and a used toilet paper roll.
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Help!!! There's nowhere to go! I want out of this madhouse! AAAAAAAAA!
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YOU want out? Well, guess what - so does this guy apparently, and as you can see he's none the better for it, same as you. Oh yeah, and this guy got locked away because he told the psychiatrists that he had seen a real actual link somewhere inside this article. But that's absurd because the links are all fake in this article!
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See also
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Emo the Fish is feeling let down because he wanted to find a link in this article, but all he ever found was Waldo...
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- What,
- Were
- You
- Expecting
- Links
- Here?
- The Unclickable Link
- Template:Fakelink
- I Can't Believe It's Not A Hyperlink
- Ohhhh.... A Link!
In Soviet Russia, Waldo finds YOU! Matt Damon Bhutan Vodski Emo Hitler Windows 2000 Aeris Gainsborough Woodbines Fisher Price This is not Waldo Poison King Zog Math Munchers LOL WAR Gimli Mauled in America Load Fate Police officer Billondy Drowning Harp Legumes Big Show The Great Khali Unwritten Rules Gas Reasons why people create articles with horribly long titles for no apparent reason, hoping somebody will randomly stumble upon it and remark on the length of the title, but then forget about it in five minutes later because their gay granny had a seizure Kittenolivia Sauron Ionosphere Undertaker Overtaker Tom Lehrer EuroDisney Morrissey Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds Christmas carol Waldo's first girlfriend Egg Discombobulator RayUser:Mr. Bob HowTo:Kill Terminators Deja vu Deja-vu Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One Geordie LaForge Genetic modification Canada Council Rolling Stones See also Irken Empire Psst, he's in here Wal-Mart Wikithug Robot Robert Mugabe Québec The Wonderful World of Dildo Calista Flockhart Manu Chao You found Wally. Who's Wally? UnBestiary This isn't Waldo either Sure, this is Waldo The Devil Went Down To Georgia Zombie Poly Rick FlairHulk Hogan Disambiguation General Groove Robert Plant Tom Cruz Clinja BENSON Polyamory Invasion of Uncyclopedia Animaniacs Labradeer Retriever Cheese Elminster Adult Swim QVFD Meow VFD Wookie All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy Waldo's best friend. InvisiCluesElvis Crabs Arkansas Cheese mines Sitcom Barack Obama Music Theory This was a stupid idea for a page, who thought of it? I'd like to speak to his mother, or his wife, Eva Braun! Oooooooo! Personality Cult Mullet Paranormal Atari Victor Wooten Fashion The Sons of Jesus Nihilism Spanish Armada Milk Cow Where's Waldo? Look! Waldo isn't here! Redundancy Redundancy Redundancy Redundancy Redundancy Pie Redundancy All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy Garfield April Ralph Stanley Link Kiptown Upon Windsearching QVFD Bonobo Red link Supreme Court of the United States Laws of thermodynamics Western Bavaria Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet'N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice Read Spleen Olive Esc PWND Dead No Waldos Here Popsicle Rob Deer Dildo Catcher in the Rye Tipper Gore Strong Bad Decepticon Party Bill of Wrongs Dwight D. Eisenhower Roswell, New Mexico Fighting Insomnia Björk Ministry Easter Bunny Brokeback Mountain Osama Bin Laden J.K. Rowling Still not Waldo New Zealand Daily Express Anime SeagullGalaga Personal Jesus Paradise Valley Chemical General Tso Air conditioning Papercut Dan Kolb harry potter Wind Tunnel Water Shellac Girlfriend Norse Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God Politics of Romania God vs. New York Spock Chris Martin Old Jersey Ireland Your mom Mose Tai Di World War III Kirk Hammett Biological Weapons Nobel Prize for Being Bono Whore Katie Holmes Grey Jedi Bing Crosby Amanda Vanstone kmart New Bjork City inuyasha Penis Frosty The Snowman Erwin Rommel The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game Euroipods Peeve George W. Bush Stoke-on-Trent Wars of Napoleon's Stature Head David Hasselhoff red_link Internet toaster Earth Waldo is not here Alan Greenspan Cthulhu Cheryl Ladd Middle Earth International Student Terror Cell Unfocom John Elway Puddle GC-161 Fghdfgbdfb Time Travel Strong Bad The Rezorkful Book of Cheats Qcqgzqgz Rasputin Help:Contents Google Spiders Engrish Independence Day Winter War Yoda Lightsabre G-Dub Syndrome It's fucking cold eh! Erotic The Justice League of Jesus Ontology Chuck Norris Qwerty Roger Daltrey Shampoo Z War of Rock Nirvana Refrigerator magnet WordGirl Captian Huggyface Jimbo 1 Wall ball Musicians Who Suck So Monumentally That It Really, Truly Amazes Me That The Earth And Any Surrounding Planets And Quite Possibly A Good Bit Of The Afterlife Have Not Yet Been Swallowed Entirely Patriots Woody Woodpecker This person will never find Waldo Corporate Takeover Moogle Spam Making up Cthulhu quotes More Spam Stoner High School Flashback episode Man uncyclopedia Katakyuk Joe Collective Consciousness Coldplay Absolute Power Noel Coward Even more spam Weak Anthropic Principle Ginger Jack Kerouac Goa Tse Tab Post-grunge Black helicopter Slime Cube James Joyce Otaku Black Mage Richard Scarry Waldo's not here Spleen Gnomewi Junichiro Koizumi Kupo Jackson's Adventure Professor X William Shatner Bomb Toast Wars Ganondorf Tony La Russa Astrology I think he's here but I'm not sure Drenthe University of Leeds Mega Man 0 Terrorist Ę = Yen Wittinghermandershire Upon Broohavensmarshington, England MP3 Janet Jackson Fursecution Kitten Huffing Rhode Island Driving Laws Algebra Flying Gypsies Woodrow Wilson Worst 100 Ways to Deliver Bad News Jello Color World War IV Danish No Waldo Energizer bunny Mississippi River Wombat The "No Gaijin Allowed"'s of Japan Hamburglar Filibuster GNU Emacs Chanel 9 Australia The Gruesome Book of Grues Gregorian Bivolaru Original Jesus The Oldest Trick in the Book Nu metal Bearded clam Not Waldo Qubo Ian Paisley Katamari Damacy International Association For Important Unnecessary Acronyms Zero Wing AAAAAAAAA! Game:Zork Peepee Sexual innuendo Q Raccoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape Pot v. Kettle Linux Oops sorry, not Waldo Russia Internet Movie Database Five O'Clock Shadow of the Colossus Cunt cunt cunt cunt crap crap shit
Surrender already, you'll never find Waldo tornadocane Black Mage Wizard Suicide VCR Manual Homeless insane Fred Phelps Russian reversal Jimmy Carter’s Home Dr Dre Nile Victor Bette Hitler Blue Nile Bob Lost Pine cone tree G.O.L.E.M 8.3 Cauliflower White Sox Divination Pilot Moogle Human Meat User:Flutter/TLACEheader WordGirl Wordgirl Hufferfish Abdullah the Butcher Becky Speed Neopets Toast Lewis and Clark
Big Show Dolph Ziggler Denica Fairman The Whammer Polkadottia Zula Lexicon (planet) Budda Dark Truder
Traxie Captain Huggy Face Multo Zula Patrol Bobby Lashley HHH Ring of Honor Noumer Scotty Goldman Colt Cabana Planet Spogg Sailor Cancer Sailor Quaoar Sailor Irk Salior Zula Sailor Galaxy Sailor Centauri Sailor Sun Sailor Gliese 581 c Pizza Planet Eris Gliese 581 c Ceres Makemake Haumea Diesel 50000 Quaoar 90377 Sedna 90482 Orcus 20000 Varuna Maya & Miguel Sailor Earth Sailor Jupiter Nayelista El Generico Dr. Two Brains Lillian Lee Sailor Titan Titan MVP Hollywood, Los Angeles, California Richard Strauss Mnemonics Shot your fuck up Line The Midnight Sun The Abyss Hello Kitty White House What to do if you open your front door one day and there is a portal to an alternate dimension instead of what you expected to see, which was probably something along the lines of whatever is usually outside your house Telethon Darth Vader Bloodbath Big Red Ball Trampoline Game, God Damnit! Run-D.M.C. Cricket Inanimate Sponge Military of Sweden MC Hammer Farscape Five pillars of Uncyclopedia Oz Captain Ultra Uncyclopedia:What You Can Do A day in the life of Ivan Denisovich Law of large numbers Donald Trump Tux Fermat's Last Theorem Magic Humans Willy Wonka Homer Simpson ACME Joey Denisa End of the World The Jimmerman Telegram Virginia; Woolf; D-Generation X DX Denica Fairman Game:Zork 5 Nazi turtle Djarums Samba 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall User:Flutter/NeoAdventure Ashe Jihad Woof Bluenecks Penalties Baader Meinhof Swords Gunbound Book of Mormon Finnegans Wake Seven The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game Joseph Stalin's Secret Jamaican Boys Fight Club Choir Benson forum rebirth Songs about Cake Political Parties Rectum Home HelpDesk Kelly Kelly Lessons of 9/11 Kate Bush Teleportation Raven Denica Orton All-american rejects Twister Steve Irwin Rectum Pie 24 Trees! War of the Nerds John Cena Waldo isn't here either ytmnd l33t Luciano Pavarotti WikiML Violet Red Black Jesus William Shatner Woof TIME magazine names "Person of the Year": Not Waldo Yellowstone Nation Park Aegyl Baknamy Bangaa Gria Helgas Hume Garif Mogle Nu Mou Occuria Rebe Seeq Urutan-Yensa Viera cow tao Sears Cardinal Biggles crap nigger AAA Sweden Chuck Norris Facts Quasi-Featured Mongolia WWE Boston, Massachusetts Crustacean Fermat's Last Theorem Prostitution Hilary Duff Asians Crimes inspired by video games Cheese Woman Wonka rapist black Final Fantasy X User:Flutter/NA/n00b Human Lindsay Lohan Condoleeza Rice transvestite Manchester Red Sox Ltd. America Boogers Beach Boys Grand Theft Auto: Beirut Spain Human vs. Kitten War Ukrainians Emo-Mart Emo TV Billhook BUHHDA RUN, ITS A GRUE Us britts call him Wally, its cus were goodFalun DafachristianityFuck Glue Moogle EaterEdjik
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External links
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- The Most Annoying Thing In Existence
- The World Wide Web as it was before hyperlinks were invented
- Linkless in Seattle
- AIDS cure
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Categories:
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