Page with no links
“I can't get out!”
“Hey whoever you are, come over here and help me with my computer - my damn browser is broken again!”
|Elton John - Linkless.ogg (file info)|
|A short song about the emptiness and existential void that linklessness may lead to.|
This is a page with no links. Unlike the Page full of links, this is a waste of time for Uncyclopedia and should be deleted. However, since this has absolutely no links, there is no way to go anywhere on this page. If you're lucky, you might find one link on Wikipedia. This is nothing but a poor parody of those pages, as Wikipedia is a poor parody of Uncyclopedia full of bad jokes and useless misinformation. This page is supposed to not have any links or pictures on purpose. This article is just wasting your time reading looking for a link but that's what Wikipedia does. For a link, either look in Legend of Zelda, or just type something else.
If it looks like there are links here, it's only because fake links like this one have been implanted into the article just to annoy and confuse the reader. In truth, there are no real links here, only fake ones. There used to be real links here, but then all but one were eaten by grues, a fate that sadly befalls many other things around here. The only link that remained disappeared, and can not be found. This is not a real page. All Your Base Are Belong To Us. You are on your way to linklessness.
"I have found links! Check the top and bottom of the page." - A helpful voice
Leonardo da Vinci just invented Uncyclopedia at the dawn of time. But unlike Morgan Freeman, he is not God. When the dinosaurs went extinct, a smell from their corpses made the cave-men and guinea pigs go insane and posted a lame version of Uncyclopedia called Wikipedia filled with lies and half truths. However the Martians were not affected, so they kept making Uncyclopedia powered by Extreme Sarcasm and Jesus Juice (thank you Michael). And they lived happily ever after in linkless bliss and played "Seven Tears" by Goombay Dance Band until they all turned gay. The end. Alright, that story sucked like a vacuum cleaner, but what else did you expect from a page consisting mostly of annoying fake links? It's not like we're writing a Shakespearean drama here...
Math formulas discussing it
There is a simple formula that demonstrates the non-locality inherent in the microcosm and undermines the true nature of the uncertainty principle. This is used to determine the average cave man's mind when doing a page like this (all of them). He is brain dead, however he thinks that he could do the page on Uncyclopedia. This article would provide a link, but...
Whatever you do, you must not click on the link saying "What links here" on the menu to the left. Doing so will cause a paradox which will lead to irreversible damage in the fabric of the space-time continuum, resulting in a universal Blue Screen of Death from which there is no escape. Of course, you will probably still click on it since you're too stupid to heed this warning, but then it will be your fault that the universe collapsed into itself. Oh no - you clicked it! What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO?! You idiot! Look - a gigantic black hole is already growing with a geometric rate in the center of the Milky Way; the black hole which will engulf the entire universe in a cataclysmic implosion within less than six weeks, and it's all your fault! Damn - why did you have to click on "What links here"?! You could have just left it alone, you blundering miscreant! But no - you HAD to click on it, and now we're all doomed because of it!
In conclusion to this very informative warning page, you mustn't ever go to Wikipedia, for there death awaits you. This page is just a warning and should not be edited or tampered with in any way. If you do, then this would look like a warning to the informative Uncyclopedia which has educated the masses ever since Leonardo da Vinci invented it. I hope you will not tell anyone on Wikipedia about this page unless they go to Mars. Guess what, this may be a way out (or not).
This is so annoying - what's the point of all this?!
There is no point to it. You should have been able to deduce from the very page title what was coming. Just because you couldn't, you fail at life.
Ah fuck you for playing this kind of sh*t - just give me a YouTube video or something to watch, anything but this crap!!!
As you wish:
No seriously, what else did you expect? This IS the page with NO LINKS. For YouTube videos, go to just about any other article than this one, moron.
You guys are so annoying, I hate this website, it's the worst ever! HATE HAET HAT
Wow, so you only just now realised that Uncyclopedia is the worst? Well, congratu-fucking-lations for finally figuring out what the general public has already known for years. We might give you a real actual link as a reward, but it looks like all we have left is a blackened banana peel and a used toilet paper roll.
Help!!! There's nowhere to go! I want out of this madhouse! AAAAAAAAA!
YOU want out? Well, guess what - so does this guy apparently, and as you can see he's none the better for it, same as you. Oh yeah, and this guy got locked away because he told the psychiatrists that he had seen a real actual link somewhere inside this article. But that's absurd because the links are all fake in this article!
- The Unclickable Link
- I Can't Believe It's Not A Hyperlink
- Ohhhh.... A Link!
Big Show Dolph Ziggler Denica Fairman The Whammer Polkadottia Zula Lexicon (planet) Budda Dark TruderTraxie Captain Huggy Face Multo Zula Patrol Bobby Lashley HHH Ring of Honor Noumer Scotty Goldman Colt Cabana Planet Spogg Sailor Cancer Sailor Quaoar Sailor Irk Salior Zula Sailor Galaxy Sailor Centauri Sailor Sun Sailor Gliese 581 c Pizza Planet Eris Gliese 581 c Ceres Makemake Haumea Diesel 50000 Quaoar 90377 Sedna 90482 Orcus 20000 Varuna Maya & Miguel Sailor Earth Sailor Jupiter Nayelista El Generico Dr. Two Brains Lillian Lee Sailor Titan Titan MVP Hollywood, Los Angeles, California Richard Strauss Mnemonics Shot your fuck up Line The Midnight Sun The Abyss Hello Kitty White House What to do if you open your front door one day and there is a portal to an alternate dimension instead of what you expected to see, which was probably something along the lines of whatever is usually outside your house Telethon Darth Vader Bloodbath Big Red Ball Trampoline Game, God Damnit! Run-D.M.C. Cricket Inanimate Sponge Military of Sweden MC Hammer Farscape Five pillars of Uncyclopedia Oz Captain Ultra Uncyclopedia:What You Can Do A day in the life of Ivan Denisovich Law of large numbers Donald Trump Tux Fermat's Last Theorem Magic Humans Willy Wonka Homer Simpson ACME Joey Denisa End of the World The Jimmerman Telegram Virginia; Woolf; D-Generation X DX Denica Fairman Game:Zork 5 Nazi turtle Djarums Samba 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall User:Flutter/NeoAdventure Ashe Jihad Woof Bluenecks Penalties Baader Meinhof Swords Gunbound Book of Mormon Finnegans Wake Seven The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game Joseph Stalin's Secret Jamaican Boys Fight Club Choir Benson forum rebirth Songs about Cake Political Parties Rectum Home HelpDesk Kelly Kelly Lessons of 9/11 Kate Bush Teleportation Raven Denica Orton All-american rejects Twister Steve Irwin Rectum Pie 24 Trees! War of the Nerds John Cena Waldo isn't here either ytmnd l33t Luciano Pavarotti WikiML Violet Red Black Jesus William Shatner Woof TIME magazine names "Person of the Year": Not Waldo Yellowstone Nation Park Aegyl Baknamy Bangaa Gria Helgas Hume Garif Mogle Nu Mou Occuria Rebe Seeq Urutan-Yensa Viera cow tao Sears Cardinal Biggles crap nigger AAA Sweden Chuck Norris Facts Quasi-Featured Mongolia WWE Boston, Massachusetts Crustacean Fermat's Last Theorem Prostitution Hilary Duff Asians Crimes inspired by video games Cheese Woman Wonka rapist black Final Fantasy X User:Flutter/NA/n00b Human Lindsay Lohan Condoleeza Rice transvestite Manchester Red Sox Ltd. America Boogers Beach Boys Grand Theft Auto: Beirut Spain Human vs. Kitten War Ukrainians Emo-Mart Emo TV Billhook BUHHDA RUN, ITS A GRUE Us britts call him Wally, its cus were goodFalun DafachristianityFuck Glue Moogle EaterEdjik
- The Most Annoying Thing In Existence
- The World Wide Web as it was before hyperlinks were invented
- Linkless in Seattle
- AIDS cure
- Articles whose editors should be hanged
- Epic Fail
- Things that don't exist
- Things that may be out to get you