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From today's featured article 

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Hello and welcome to our one hour special on the American Man, brought to you by cool, refreshing, Coors Light! In the next hour, you will learn the ins and outs of being a true man according to our sponsor, Coors Light. Silver Bullet!

Many of these qualities are (or should be) entirely obvious to any man living in America, sitting on his couch with his dumbass friends, a plate of wings on the coffee table, and a frost-brewed Coors Light in his hand to wash it all down with. However, for those wishing to study the subtle mannerisms of the species, for lesser men hoping to become less of a wimp (or straight), or for annoyed girlfriends/wives who are sick of repressing their rage for their beastly better halves, we present the following crash-course in manhood as our sponsor, ice cold Coors Light, would have us do so. (Full article...)

Did you know... 

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  • ... that Pigpen had a collection of over 200 various skin diseases during his childhood? (Pictured)
  • ...that Ram Ranch really rocks?
  • ... that 69% percent of statistics contain sexual innuendo?
  • ... that Phonics (pronounced Pa-hon-iks.) is one of the deadliest and most addictive drugs on the streets? It is said to get children "hooked" in four weeks or your money back.
  • ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
  • ... that your car is rolling down the driveway right now?
  • …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
  • ... that you can fry a potato but not a potatoe, according to the Potato-tomato theorem?

In the news 

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Ongoing: The wait for GTA VIEurovision Song ContestRussian InvasionIsrael–Hamas conflictUnited States presidential election aftermath • College football championship game • Another Josh Allen/Patrick Mahomes playoff game. Spoiler Alert: refs rig game for Chiefs again

Recent deaths: A CEO who died peacefully and surrounded by his loving familyGreg GumbelJimmy CarterLiberal Party of CanadaAaron Rodgers' career • Jean-Marie Le PenPeter YarrowAnita BryantYoon Suk Yeol's presidency and freedomBob UeckerDame Joan Plowright

Upcoming deaths: TikTokThe Kansas City Chiefs Refs seasonBashar al-AssadDiddy's freedomJay‑Z's career and freedomLuigi MangioneKate MiddletonYour New Year's resolutionsLos AngelesIsrael–Hamas conflictLaura Palmer

On this day 

Don't fucking move

January 22: National Cover-Up Day

Picture of the day

Truthful Vending Coffee Machine
The future of coffee vending machines is here! We shan't be lied to anymore, and when we press the button marked coffee colored water we will actually get that, and not frothy double glazed cappuccino! Or vice versa.

Image credit: Modusoperandi
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