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Zork

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This makes the article more aerodynamic, and thus more maneuverable at high speeds. Take caution and carry a first-aid kit at all times if you don't know that the colonel and Rosemary are actually Metal Gear Arsenal's AI, O'Brien was an agent of the Ministry of Love, Seinfeld and his friends are found guilty, Prufrock isn't Prince Hamlet, Janeway defeats the Borg, Fayed detonates a nuke, Brandy Alexander is Shannon's brother, M. Bison was the killer of Chun Li's father, and Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!!
 InvisiClues Score: 0, duh Moves: 0

Welcome to the Zork InvisiClues menu! Since you obviously have both the gaming skills of a limbless rabbit and the self-restraint of a limbless rabbit in heat, we at Unfocom have provided you with a series of ambiguous hints and wildly inaccurate prophecies so that you, too, can produce the Victory screen on your monitor for a few seconds and thus receive full product satisfaction!