From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Today's Featured Article
|
|
Mark Rothko (September 25, 1903 – February 25, 1970) was a Latvian born, American artist who became famous for his color field, abstract expressionist paintings. Since he personally rejected those labels to describe his work and even bristled at the word “abstract”, it’s fair to throw in pretentious avante-garde nutjob as well.
The first achievement of anyone who wishes to become an artist is to break your parent’s hearts by becoming “the special child” who ignores the economic realities of life and forgoes a lucrative or realistic career for the sake of hanging out with other people just like him or herself. Rothko accomplished this pre-requisite during the American Great Depression of the 1930’s and left his mother crying “why why why” many years before the phrase would be popularized by Nancy Kerrigan. (Full article...)
|
Did you know...
|
- ... that Angelina Jolie took method acting to the extreme to play the role of Slim in A Bug's Life? (Pictured)
- ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
- ... that 100% of divorces start with marriage?
- ... that Alexander isn't really that Great?
- ... that Richard Nixon was well-known for his honesty and often referred to as Honest Dick?
- ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
- ... that if you poke a whale in the tummy it will giggle like a schoolgirl?
- ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
- ... that Pigpen had a collection of over 200 various skin diseases during his childhood? (Pictured)
- ... that everything will become nostalgic due to everything being worse?
- ... that individuals born under the sign of Gemini are often flammable and vulnerable to bear attacks?
- ... tennis isn't just a game?
- ... that I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the frickin' frogs gay?
- ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... that women are more likely to have a vagina than men?
- ... that Angelina Jolie took method acting to the extreme to play the role of Slim in A Bug's Life? (Pictured)
- ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
- ... that 100% of divorces start with marriage?
- ... that Alexander isn't really that Great?
- ... that Richard Nixon was well-known for his honesty and often referred to as Honest Dick?
- ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
- ... that if you poke a whale in the tummy it will giggle like a schoolgirl?
- ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
- ... that Pigpen had a collection of over 200 various skin diseases during his childhood? (Pictured)
- ... that everything will become nostalgic due to everything being worse?
- ... that individuals born under the sign of Gemini are often flammable and vulnerable to bear attacks?
- ... tennis isn't just a game?
- ... that I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the frickin' frogs gay?
- ... that a simile is like a metaphor? And hyperbole is the greatest thing ever?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... that women are more likely to have a vagina than men?
- ... that Angelina Jolie took method acting to the extreme to play the role of Slim in A Bug's Life? (Pictured)
- ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
- ... that 100% of divorces start with marriage?
- ... that Alexander isn't really that Great?
- ... that Richard Nixon was well-known for his honesty and often referred to as Honest Dick?
- ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
- ... that if you poke a whale in the tummy it will giggle like a schoolgirl?
- ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
|
|
In the news
|
|
|
On this day...
|
March 6: Roadkill Appreciation Day (North America & Australia)
- 3500 BC - In the first recorded instance of roadkill, Egyptian Pharaoh Ramses IV hits a small cat with his chariot. Shameful.
- 1869 - The first historical instance of so-called "cannibal roadkill" occurs when a horse-drawn buggy strikes a horse pulling a second buggy.
- 1934 - Hitler runs over a small ferret in his Volkswagen, precipitating his later invasion of Poland.
- 1962 - Julia Childs releases a groundbreaking roadkill culinary masterpiece titled Treadmarks and Tarragon.
- 1969 - President Nixon continues the Road Kill bombing over Vietnam.
- 1990 - Road Kill is officially the new Mystery Meat in school lunches.
- 1995 - Steve Ballmer runs over my dog after yelling at the top of his lungs "I'm going to fucking bury that dog. I've done it before and I will do it again. I'm going to Fucking Kill that dog."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Uncyclopedia's sista projects
|
| Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.
|
Uncyclopedia Languages
|
| This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,982 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Japanese!:
|
Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.
