User:Lenoxus/Main page

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia that can edit anyone. 41,026 articles in English

Politics Games Computers

People Quaint Coherent

Science History All

Today's Featured Article The Autoconspiracy 2000 (more commonly known as the Conspiracy Theory Generator) is a top-secret computer program built by the world's most elite historians and computer scientists for the purpose of expanding historical knowledge beyond that which would normally not be achievable by humans. The goal of the program is to map out and eventually solve every historical uncertainty by "Exploring the Infinite Chronoscape" as the program's metadata puts it. Early versions of the Autoconspiracy can be traced back to prehistoric times, where archaeological records show evidence of some particularly clever cavemen who had studied the natural patterns of moss and of mud to explain the origins of organic material. More refined methods of discovering hidden truths came later, culminating with the final Autoconspiracy version, Autoconspiracy 2000 c. 2000. (Full article...) Recently featured: Why?:Is there a monkey in my fridge? John Marshall You Rob Gronkowski Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... ... that the waterways of Oslo, Norway are much like Venice, except that they are open sewers? (Pictured) ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it? ... that torture is better to give than to receive? ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"? ... that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind? ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together? ... that Wikipedia contains millions of articles written by countless anonymous contributors? (Pictured) ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car? ... that everything will become nostalgic due to everything being worse? ... no, you didn't! Stop lying! ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?" ... that Boston Bruins goaltender Gerry Cheevers was one of the most feared hockey players in the so-called "stick to the groin" era? ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that the only cure for the hiccups is an orgasm? ... that the waterways of Oslo, Norway are much like Venice, except that they are open sewers? (Pictured) ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it? ... that torture is better to give than to receive? ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"? ... that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind? ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together? ... that Wikipedia contains millions of articles written by countless anonymous contributors? (Pictured) ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car? ... that everything will become nostalgic due to everything being worse? ... no, you didn't! Stop lying! ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?" ... that Boston Bruins goaltender Gerry Cheevers was one of the most feared hockey players in the so-called "stick to the groin" era? ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand? ... that the only cure for the hiccups is an orgasm? ... that the waterways of Oslo, Norway are much like Venice, except that they are open sewers? (Pictured) ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it? ... that torture is better to give than to receive? ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank? ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die? ... that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"? ... that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind? ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?	In the news He literally fought nail and tooth for Team America Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey (Pictured); Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters So.. about that Super Bowl.. Bad Bunny and TPUSA offer equally heathen, equally crappy halftime shows GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL!! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Next season's Super Bowl revealed to be on Valentine's Day Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Files • r/TheDarnold still having a massive field day • NFL fans experiencing withdrawal symptoms with the season now over • Team Canada rethinking life Recent deaths: Brad Arnold • NFL season • Winter Olympics • Some kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny title • James Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) • Robert Duvall • Kurt Van Dyke (not Dick) • Jesse Jackson • YouTube • Tom Noonan • Eric Dane • Melania Trump's big movie star career • Team Canada hockey, twice, AND their curling team • Some Nerd named Robert Carradine Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek) • Quinton Reviews Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy and snow handling capability • Weed • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Dancin' Maduro • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files • the US government, again • Warner Bros. (?) • A Las Vegas hotel that no one's going to remember • Mexico On this day... February 24: "I don't care what day it is" Day 1803 - In Marbury v Madison, two men named Mr. Marbury and Mr. Madison fight each other with canes, and the Supreme Court decides who wins. 1863 - People on their way to California collapse from heat while traveling across the desert, and rather than dying with humanity, they found Arizona. 1920 - God decides today is a good day to create Nazis, a few select Germans suddenly feel an unusual aversion to international Jewry. 1942 - Aliens attack the city of Los Angeles! (Pictured) They're confused for Japanese soldiers due to racism. 1978 - Five men disappear after attending a college basketball game in California. The bodies of four of them were actually clones of the same person. 2007 - Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe launches a spy satellite to perv on Kim Jong-un's sister, Kim Yo-jong. 2008 - Fidel Castro retires, spends the rest of his days smoking cigars and laughing at assassination attempts.
Today's featured picture A sickophant in its natural habitat. Image credit: Lyrithya View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
edit Recent Articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push
Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners Now you only have 4, yes 4 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia. UnNews News on crack Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia Undictionary Best left unsaid UnTunes Noisy things UnGames Ways to waste away HowTo Like Ikea without the pictures UnBooks Content-free books Unquotable Useless misquotes Uncycloversity No student loans UnPoetia Dreams deferred UnDebate Debate the irrelevant UnScripts We ruin stage too Why? Because UnReviews Hack frauds UnVoyage Armchair travel Uncyclomedia The Foundation
Uncyclopedia Languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,026 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Spanish!: Uncyclopedia English United States 41,026 Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785 アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 19194 Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 17766 Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14423 Désencyclopédie Français France 8936 Inciclopedia Español Spain 12400 偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6417 Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 6330 Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Other Uncyclopedias 백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 6303 ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3132 Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 275 Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 105 伪基百科 汉语 China 8269 איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2187 קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 46 Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 6054 Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4563 Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 762 اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 976 نانشنامه فارسی Iran 943 ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 4 Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 1 Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9095 Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2497 Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 4 ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 8 আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 17 Φρικηπαίδεια Ελληνικά Greece 2812 Celwyddoniadur Cymraeg Wales 103 Scotypedia Scots Scotland 10 Frithchiclipéid Gaeilge Ireland 19 Kengencyclopedia Lëtzebuergesch Luxembourg 7 Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 456 Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27 Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303 Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 31 Википедија Македонски Macedonia 175 Oncyclopedia Nederlands Belgium and Holland 2807 Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 21 Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3530 Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1888 Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1731 Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 234 Neciclopedie Română Romania 167 Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 4 Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1117 Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4466 Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96 Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 159 Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 267 Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 3176 Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 14 Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 5009 Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 33 Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 279 Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar 8 Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel 7 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Complete list • Multilingual coordination • Requests for new languages

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.