User:Isra1337/Main Page hybrid

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Today's featured picture
Hand Grenade

After being given superpowers by the Manhattan Project, Harry S. Truman (a.k.a. The Truman Torch) personally drops the bomb on Hiroshima. (Photo credit: Isra1337 · Archive · Nominate new image)

Today's featured article
Aristocracy.jpg

Aristocrats are a grouping of people who are thought to be the highest social class in a population. They are typically above the general populace but below the monarch, although generally speaking most aristocrats don't mind who they are on top of, or indeed beneath.

Throughout history, nobles have commanded tribute in the form of cash, labour, crop yield and other despicable acts of submission from commoners. In some countries, the local lord could impose restrictions on such a commoner's movements, religion or sexuality; a power he took advantage of without a second's thought. From the Middle Ages onwards, aristocrats have always had a need for hapless peasants desperate to earn a quick half-a-crown by taking part in the family's sadistic rituals. (Full article...)

Did you know...
*... that Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales lost his virginity at age 34, but he found it again at age 35?
Word of the Day
procrastination
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
Recent News
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It's real.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Hamas "peace talks" • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • SNL cast exodus • K-pop: The Movie • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys

Recent deaths: Ozzy OsbourneChuck MangioneHulk HoganResident AlienDown syndromeTom LehrerThe systemFUBARCartoon Network on Comcast's basic cable package • Sydney Sweeney's new movie • Terence StampThe Devil's Rejects Unrated Director's Cut 4K (also Saw 2 & 3)

Upcoming deaths: DEIR. Kelly and Bryan Kohberger in jail • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • The flowers you bring Alan BergmanDallas Cowboys' season • MSNBCLil Nas XDonald Trump, either by angry cartel members, "meanie judges", or (finally) releasing the Epstein files

On this day...
September 4: Unnecessary Surgery Day
  • 30 - The Original Artists release album "20/20: The 20 Greatest hits from the 20's"
  • 1427 - Katie Price formed by sending an electric current through plastic. Generally seen to be a lousy idea.
  • 2003 - Al Gore has an aditional nose surgically attatched to his back, thus letting him smell his own farts.
  • 1834 - Vlad Drakul cancels newspaper subscription.
  • 1933 or 1934 - Eduard Khil was born. Let the trolling begin!
  • 1952 - Colonel Potter tries to take out Lt. Radar O'Riley's appendix, only to discover after making an incision that it's already out.
  • 1954 - In the only such instance in recorded history, your mom lost weight.
  • 1971 - Elvis gets a paper cut.
  • 1972 - Elvis gets a paper clip.
  • 1975 - A distant relative of a famous musician accidentally stumbles in front of an oncoming taxi cab, but the car stops, and he survives.
  • 1980 - John Denver hits the snooze button.
  • 1983 - Michael Jackson nearly dies of food poisoning after eating 12-year-old nuts.
  • 1984 - Pop star Prince has a second penis surgically attached. Millions think he's a gimp. Millions more just think it is so he can go and fuck himself. A recent internet video proves this.
  • 1985 - Cary Grant finds his bedside table has a small crack on one of the legs.
  • 1994 - An Ace Of Base song is released. The subsequent decontamination process takes 15 years to complete.
  • 1996 - Pop star Prince (or whatever the fuck he's called now) has a third penis surgically attached.
  • 1997 - Prince succesfully sues his surgeon for giving him the penis of an impotent man, claiming it has given his other two penises "performance anxiety". Nobody knows what the fuck he's talking about. Again.
  • 2005 - Steve Irwin kills a stingray in a boating accident while 5 times over the drink drive limit.
  • 2006 - Steve Irwin is murdered by a stingray. Police say it was an accident and the stingray isn't charged.
  • 2050 - Australians finally stop referring to Steve Irwin as a great bloke/battler/fighter/true Aussie and generally agree he was a bit stupid.
Recent Articles


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Writer and Noob of the Month
Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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