User:Isra1337/Main Page

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Today's featured picture
Hand Grenade

The M822 Hand Grenade is an explosive device that resembles a hand. On activation, the device lunges towards the nearest throat or throat-like object and latches on tight with its five "fingers" exploding violently in a gruesome mess. Special care must be taken when activating the grenade. When activated, one should run behind the nearest wall or bush and squat down, so that the grenade cannot "see" you.

Photo credit: Mosquitopsu
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Today's featured article
Dalmatianandcat.jpg

"Sorry I'm closing" he said.

"Not until you've seen our audition" said the father.

"Come tomorrow in the morning"

"By tomorrow you'll have lost the most sensational variety show ever to blow people's faces off".

"Okay...you've got 5 minutes" said the talent agent. (Full article...)

Did you know...
*... that Richard Nixon was well-known for his honesty and often referred to as Honest Dick?
  • ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?
Word of the Day
orgasm
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
Recent News
Jacksonbabyoutback.jpg
Not my baby!

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Pregnant moms taking Tylenol to give their babies "autism powers" • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in D.C. • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Showdown in NYC between Mamdani the Commie, The Andrew Formerly Known as Governor, and a Republican cat man

Recent deaths: Trump's pet slothRobert RedfordU.S. Federal GovernmentJane GoodallDiane KeatonGaza WarDrew StruzanWindows 10D'AngeloYouTube player's old design • A guitarist and a security guard from KISSJune LockhartNick MangoldJamaica, at the hands of Hurricane Melissa • Toronto Blue Jays' World Series dreams • Donna GodchauxDiane LaddDick Cheney

Upcoming deaths: DEIIran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBCDonald Trump • Aforementioned Tylenol moms • Mark Butt-fumble's career• Coral reefsCapitalism in NYC • Blue Jays fans' livers and kidneys

On this day...
Red states voted for Bush while blue states voted for Hussein. People in Yellow states threw their votes away by voting for Ross Perot.

November 4: Artificial Limb Awareness Diurnal Period

  • 200 - Oedipus: One Bad Mothafucka released by Mythic Records, goes triple platinum.
  • 1600 and something - Descartes decides the mind is separate from the body, through logical reasoning and skeptical doubt.
  • 2001 - God wins Mega-Ball lottery. Fix suspected.
  • 2009 - List of people who steal lists is stolen.
  • 2012 - Mexicans win gold, silver, and bronze in Olympic Lawn-mowing.
Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...


Writer and Noob of the Month
Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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