Unmain Page

Welcome to the Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopaedia that any intelligent primate can edit. 41,103 articles in English

Politics Games Music

Science History Art

Television Film Theatre

Society People All Portals

You are wasting this internet site's time. You should be writing something, but instead you are just sitting there, waiting for it to entertain you. You could even be the Time Magazine Person of the Year. Don't you have any sense of responsibility? How can you live with yourself? Think about all the times you've laughed heartily at some passing rejoinder in the forums, guffawed mightily at a clever turn of phrase on your talkpage, or even politely smiled at some article during your favorite Uncyclopedia program: HumorSearch. Don't you think you owe it to this wiki to put in at least a semblance of effort to return the favor? You should cease and desist all extraneous and benign activity and write an article. Okay, that was incredibly rude, mate. Firstly, I think you should be the one writing the article, seeing as you are the one who bloody gives a damn. Secondly, by caring about what I do with every second of my precious time spent on Uncyclopedia and forming an essay on what I should be doing, you have wasted more of the common people's time than I could ever imagine. Thirdly, how can you live with yourself? You think yourself funny, don't you? Well I don't. You are an idiot and have problems. Bugger off. What? Who says "bugger" besides Captain Price? Probably some British creeper. British creeper, whoever you are, you need to "bugger" off, you filthy "wanker"!(Full article...) Recently featured: Rob Gronkowski Kirkification Osu! Maxipad Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... *... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that 69% percent of statistics contain sexual innuendo? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior? ... that 69% percent of statistics contain sexual innuendo? ... that the American Civil War was actually marked by many instances of uncivil behavior?	In the news Too bad you can't customize this in the original. Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April (Pictured) Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Buffalo Bills owner Terry Pegula proven to be clueless, fires the wrong guy Denver Broncos quarterback Bo Nix accidentally curses himself in playoff win Ongoing: Eurovision Green Room in danger of sexual harassment • The wait for GTA VI and Spaceballs 2 • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • Non-Bears invading Tennessee • Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • New England Patriots fans being insufferable like it's 2016 • r/TheDarnold having a field day • ICE-y chaos in Minnesota • Fallout from the Epstein Files Recent deaths: The MetroCard • Stranger Things • the other Black guy from John Carpenter's The Thing • Bob Weir • Scott Adams • Kianna Underwood • Buffalo Bills', San Francisco 49ers', Houston Texans' and Da Bears' seasons • Bo Nix's ankle • Sean McDermott's Bills tenure • Denver Broncos' and Los Angeles Rams' seasons • Uncyclopedia • Catherine O'Hara • Lamont Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Weed • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • Dancin' Maduro • Aaron Rodgers' career • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files (cough cough Bill and Hillary Clinton) • Travis Kelce On this day... February 4: Nobody Does Anything Interesting Day 220 AD - Emperor Cao Cao of the Han Dynasty, knowing the end is near, has the imperial chef make him his favorite sandwich. 1142 - Starving peasants in medieval Germany continue to starve. 1877 - Charles Dickens has severe constipation, contemplates going to the doctor. 1943 - Hitler finds some time out of his day to play with his dog Blondi. 1968 - Lyndon B. Johnson drinks some really bad coffee, tells his wife. 1977 - Eric Clapton orders a tuna sandwich from the deli but is given egg salad instead, doesn't notice until he gets home. 2004 - Mark Zuckerberg invents the Facebook status, now people can be uninteresting whenever they want. 2008 - Parliament forces non-electric cars to drive in a place that is not in London. 2017 - Mike in HR spreads butter on a burnt piece of toast on purpose. Many speculate him to be completely batshit insane.
Today's featured picture The Drunk Olympics is an athletic competition in which all participating athletes compete in several sporting events while intoxicated far beyond the typical human breaking point. It has spawned the creation of several organized competitions, including Thunderdome and Cup Stacking. Image credit: The Thinker View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
edit Recent Articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...
Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia. UnNews News on crack Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia Undictionary Best left unsaid UnTunes Noisy things UnGames Ways to waste away HowTo Like Ikea without the pictures UnBooks Content-free books Unquotable Useless misquotes Uncycloversity No student loans UnPoetia Dreams deferred UnDebate Debate the irrelevant UnScripts We ruin stage too Why? Because UnReviews Hack frauds UnVoyage Armchair travel Uncyclomedia The Foundation
Uncyclopedia Languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,103 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Unmain Page!: Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 41,103 Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785 アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 19194 Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 17766 Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14423 Désencyclopédie Français France 8936 Inciclopedia Español Spain 12400 偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6417 Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 6330 Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Other Uncyclopedias 백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 6303 ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3132 Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 275 Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 105 伪基百科 汉语 Commie China 8269 איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2187 קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 46 Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 6054 Ndhablek Basa Jawa Java 14 Goblogpedia Basa Sunda Sunda 11 Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 762 اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 976 نانشنامه فارسی Iran 943 ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 4 Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 1 Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9095 Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4563 Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2497 Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 4 ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 8 Valenciclopèdia Català Andorra 1060 Nunyepedia Asturianu Asturias 59 Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 5009 Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 33 আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 17 Φρικηπαίδεια Ελληνικά Greece 2812 Celwyddoniadur Cymraeg Wales 103 Scotypedia Scots Scotland 10 Frithchiclipéid Gaeilge Ireland 19 Kengencyclopedia Lëtzebuergesch Luxembourg 7 Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 456 Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27 Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303 Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 31 Википедија Македонски Macedonia 175 Oncyclopedia Nederlands Belgium and Holland 2807 Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 21 Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3530 Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1888 Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1731 Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 234 Neciclopedie Română Romania 167 Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 4 Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1117 Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4466 Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96 Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 159 Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 267 Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 3176 Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 14 Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 279 Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar 8 Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel 7 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Article (Main) • Eald Ænglisc (Old English) • Babelfish • Blog • CafeMess (CafePress) • We get signal. (Engrish) • Galactic Basic Standard • Hitlerbear • Lietuvių Jiaunimų kalba • iHumor (Apple) • 1337 (Leet) • Re: PharmaccgRy (Mail Spam) • 조선말 (North Korean) • Newspeak • Nub (N00b) • Wildeizms (Oscar Wilde) • Manx (Pirate) • Middle Egyptian (Hieroglyphic) • Napulitana (Neapolitan) • Trekkies • Simple English • Testament • AAAAAAAAA! (Vagrant) • Vèneto (Venetian) • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese) • White Nationalist (White Supremacist) Complete list • Multilingual coordination • Requests for new languages

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.