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Biffy Clyro is a Scottish rock band from Scotland. As well as being Scottish, nobody outside of the rainy isles has heard of them. The band is composed of one Scottish guy, and two other Scottish guys who are for some reason twins, even though they look nothing alike. During concerts, the trio are joined by musicians Mike Vennart and Dick "99% of Gamblers Quit Before They Win it Big" Ingram. Currently signed to 14th Floor Records, they have released at least six albums. Following the first three, their maybe-existent fan base grew to slightly larger numbers. As for who they actually are, I'm still not sure. I'm pretty sure they're a band, however. As well as being from Scotland, they are apparently very popular in the UK, which is not a place I've visited. As for their music... I'm not sure that exists either. (Full article...) Recently featured: Biffy Clyro Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Conspiracy Theory Generator Archive · Vote for featured articles · Featured today, a long long time ago Rhode Island, featured on 11 March 2025: Featured version XBA, featured on 12 March 2021: Featured version Did you know... ... I could absolutely kill for something to eat right now? (Pictured) ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... that a chicken-proof lawn is impeckable? ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge? ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries! ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe? Like, way more? ... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped? ... that the Pope recently announced that the whole "Christianity" thing is a whole load of shit? ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside? ... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"? ... that I think you know what's happening today? ... Donald Trump? More like... Donald Gay! Hah, gottem! ... I could absolutely kill for something to eat right now? (Pictured) ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... that a chicken-proof lawn is impeckable? ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge? ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries! ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe? Like, way more? ... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped? ... that the Pope recently announced that the whole "Christianity" thing is a whole load of shit? ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside? ... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"? ... that I think you know what's happening today? ... Donald Trump? More like... Donald Gay! Hah, gottem! ... I could absolutely kill for something to eat right now? (Pictured) ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... that a chicken-proof lawn is impeckable? ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge? ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries! ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe? Like, way more? ... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing? ... that communist jokes are only funny if everyone gets them? ... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped? ... that the Pope recently announced that the whole "Christianity" thing is a whole load of shit? ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside? ... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"? ... that I think you know what's happening today? ... Donald Trump? More like... Donald Gay! Hah, gottem! ... I could absolutely kill for something to eat right now? (Pictured) ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... that a chicken-proof lawn is impeckable? ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge? ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries! ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe? Like, way more?	In the news Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize (Pictured) Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein Files • War Special Combat Operation in Iran • Winter Paralympics • Saturn Awards • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed Recent deaths: Warner Bros. bidding war • Neil Sedaka • Ali Khamenei • Team Italy sled hockey • Miami Dolphins • That guy from Boston. The band, not the city. But isn't the band from the city? Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • Weed • Dancin' Maduro • Iran • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons On this day... March 12: Indecent Exposure Day 1504 - Michelangelo's David lambasted by contemporary Italian critics for being insufficiently endowed (Pictured). 1923 - Mankind declares war on the rainforest after a tree lands on my infant boy, you are dead to me trees dead to me. 1962 - Beach bums take over much of Southern California, rendering it uninhabitable for decades. 1982 - Hospital administrators announce that disco has slipped into a coma and not expected to survive. 1994 - The Church of England allows women to become priests, but only on Sundays. 2011 - A Nuclear power plant in Japan explodes after massive earthquake and tsunami, Japanese children are born kinda fat now: coincidence?
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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