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Good evening crew of the RMS Titanic. My name is Scuttlebutt, Sidney Scuttlebutt. I am the head of the exterior furniture section on this ship. My job is to provide deckchairs for the comfort of all First Class and Second Class passengers. Third Class passengers are not entitled to deckchairs so you will not need to show them how they work.
This may be the Titanic's maiden voyage but I am already a professional at the art of deckchair maintenance as I have worked on the Titanic's sister ship RMS Olympic. I believe a carefully prepared deckchair with the option of a blanket and cushion is essential if travellers want to take in the cold April air of 1912. So I will now demonstrate what we do.
What was that? You want to know more about the lifeboats? We can talk about that tomorrow. Those boats are to rescue people at sea, not the people here as this ship is unsinkable, made of steel that is light enough to float. There is no need to be worried. For those who really want to learn more about lifeboats, I understand Captain Smith will be holding a class tomorrow. (Full article...)
Featured today, a long long time ago
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Did you know...
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- ... that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
- ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!
- ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that a very large number of events, both noteworthy and non-noteworthy, occurred in 1993?
 - ... that although the effects of alternative medicine are difficult to separate from a placebo, dumb hippies are easy to separate from their money?
- ... that the largest collection of human bullshit is located in the United States Congress?
- ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure AIDS?
- ... that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?
- ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
- ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
 - ... that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
- ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!
- ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that a very large number of events, both noteworthy and non-noteworthy, occurred in 1993?
- ... that although the effects of alternative medicine are difficult to separate from a placebo, dumb hippies are easy to separate from their money?
- ... that the largest collection of human bullshit is located in the United States Congress?
- ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure AIDS?
- ... that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?
- ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
- ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
- ... that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
- ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!
- ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that a very large number of events, both noteworthy and non-noteworthy, occurred in 1993?
- ... that although the effects of alternative medicine are difficult to separate from a placebo, dumb hippies are easy to separate from their money?
- ... that the largest collection of human bullshit is located in the United States Congress?
- ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise?
- ... that Mercury is not a miracle substance and does not cure AIDS?
- ... that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?
- ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
- ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time?
- ... that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
- ... that in Spanish, "¡Chinga tu madre, cabrón!" means "Have a nice day"? Tell your friends!
- ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that a very large number of events, both noteworthy and non-noteworthy, occurred in 1993?
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On this day...
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