User:Zombiebaron/VanHalen

Welcome to Halenopedia, the Van Halen-obsessed encyclopedia that can Jump! 1984 articles about Panama

Van Halen Eddie Van Halen David Lee Roth

Sammy Hagar Hot for Teacher You Really Got Me

Dreams Jamie's Cryin' Eruption

Analog horror (Horrori internetus analogus) is an invasive species that have infested the realms of the interwebs, especially in the deserted landscape known as YouTube. Some traits that these species share include horrible visual effects, some dumb storyline of someone recording a video then dying for no reason, stretched out faces, and absurd amounts of static. It is an incredibly dangerous species and it is highly advised to not walk near it, as immediate contact with it can lead to severe health issues such as boredom and, in the worst of cases, cringe. (Full article...) Recently featured: Boston Analog horror Admiral Ackbar Everyone is Hitler Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... *... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores? ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink? ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores? ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink? ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores? ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink? ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores?	In the news "It's for the children's own good!" Uncylopedia introduces AI Age Guesser™, petition nears 100,000 signatures Trump fires Zakk Wylde Trump sends condolences to "Ozzie Nelson," "Paul Hogan," "Luigi Mangione" Epstein list predictions Starmer bans pornography nationwide (Pictured) Starmer to ban VPNs nationwide Ozzy Osbourne remembers Uncyclopedia Obama to Democrats: "toughen up, you fucking pussies!" Trump sends condolences to tough-guy actor "Mikey Madison" Clint Eastwood announces plans to live forever Trumpman introduces Trumpmobile Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill" United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins Lawyer is unable to remember what the trial is about, defendant is convicted of burglary Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Superman and Super Dog's movie doing surprisingly well • Israel/Iran and Russia/Ukraine "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk) Recent deaths: Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Bill Cosby's TV son • Bryan Kohberger's freedom • Ozzy Osbourne • Chuck Mangione • Hulk Hogan • Resident Alien • Down syndrome • Tom Lehrer • The system • FUBAR Upcoming deaths: DEI • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game • MAGA • Joe Biden's credibility • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Bryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates On this day... August 15: Hug People While You're on Fire Day: 1,000,000 BC - Caveman introduces fire to humankind as he hugs people for help while he is on fire. 1800 - Napoleon invades Russia, but forgets to hug Stalin when he on fire, thus ensuring French defeat. 1963 - Buddhist Monks protest South Vietnam government's discriminatory policies which favor Catholics by lighting themselves on fire and hugging the Arch-Bishop. 1975 - Three members of the Fantastic Four hospitalized with third degree burns after the fourth member, Johnny Storm, takes Ecstasy. 2002 - Hug People While You're on Fire Day partially negated by Hug People While You're Wet Day
Featured picture It wasn't until Michelangelo's parents gave him a "Etch-A-Sculpt" that he decided to become an artist. Image credit: Modusoperandi View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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