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40,261 Zombiebaron Zombiebaron Zombiebaron
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The Metalheads are an ethno-religious tribe and primitive forerunner of the human race that display heightened levels of aggression, exceptional constitution, narrowmindedness, and a strong affection for loud, violent, evil-sounding, vaguely otherworldly (Brutal) music. They are widely accepted, by most academics, to be the basis for Gods and supernatural deities in all popular religions. While the average Metalhead sees himself as a rock god, the average person sees a woman in bad need of a new wardrobe. However, this dreaded aperture when presented on stage begins to shine like gold in the form of sounds manipulated via surprising mental and physical manual dexterity. (Full article...)
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Did you know...
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- ... that this is why we can't have nice things?
- ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
- ... that you're more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to discard an irrational fear based on a statistic like this one?
- ...that Santa sees you while you're sleeping, and he knows when you're awake?
- ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)?
- ... that life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate?
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In the news
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Sly Stallone
(1946-Present)
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On this day...
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June 30: Dare A Younger Sibling To Eat An Insect Day (pictured)
- 3000 BC – Cain dares Abel to eat a scorpion. Abel does, and falls dead. Cain tries to explain it was an accident, but nobody will listen.
- 1500 BC – Aaron dares his younger brother Moses to eat a scarab beetle. Moses does so, and the gritty taste convinces him to lead his people from Egypt.
- 1859 – Oscar Wilde, despondent over not having a sibling to dare to eat an insect or be dared to eat an insect by, consumes an earwig.
- 1921 – U.S. President Warren G. Harding appoints former President William Howard Taft to the Supreme Court, after Taft successfully attempts to eat a small quantitiy of mosquitoes.
- 1959 – American actor Vincent D'Onofrio is born, paving the way to a career of acting as though he had just accepted a dare to eat a rather nasty-tasting insect.
- 1971 – Ohio ratifies the 26th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, lowering the voting age to 18, and lowering the threshold at which younger siblings are no longer required to accept bug-related dares to 16.
- 1999 – The Court of Bermuda sentences Erik Deli to death for putting mosquito paste on his younger brother's sandwich.
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
Oh my god! There are no more days left! It's today or miss the boat to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!
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| This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,261 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Zombiebaron/Zombiebaron Day!:
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