User:UnJetamo

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the content-free enjetamopedia that anyone-but-you can edit.
23 articles in Jetlish

The Guide that Beginners(and hitchhikers) refer to. I think. · Hawaii Five-o · Yea mahn. We be styling! · Answers · HELP ME!

· Donate all your moneyz 2 MEEEEE Blouse..Hehe! · The stuff that's TEH BEST · ALL THE FREAKING PAGES IN THE WORLD! INCLUDING MADDOX'S!

Today's featured article

MonkeyInFridge69.png

Ahhh. Long day of work over. Time to grab that big-ass bowl of vegetable beef barley soup in the fridge.

Bill, you better not have touched my soup again! Like that time you got so drunk you took a whiz in it. Twice. Come to think of it, it was shitty soup. That probably improved it. Not like this one.

Let's see, cake, milk, horse semen, ketchup, monkey, hair roller thingy, soup! Yes! My life is whole again!

Hold on...

Why is my hair roller in here?

Wait...

This horse semen tastes funny. Did you put your semen in here again, Bill?

Don't ask how I know what yours tastes like. We were drunk. Not my fault.

Just a minute...

WHY IS THERE A MONKEY IN MY FUCKING FRIDGE?!? (Full article...)

Did you know...

689509 military parade 2.jpg
  • ... that the entire army of Liechtenstein consists of 3 soldiers? (Pictured)
  • ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
  • ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace...
  • ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
  • ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
  • ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?
  • ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
  • ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?
Icecream6gyfc2.jpg
  • ... that "crack" is the hood's most effective diet pill? (Pictured)
  • ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
  • ... that Uranus is a gas giant?
  • ... that Abraham Lincoln was an accomplished skateboarder?
  • ... that making drugs explode in your stomach is not a good way to make yourself smarter?
  • ... that within a few weeks of being held in captivity dolphins are able to train humans to stand at the side of a pool and throw them fish?
  • ... that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience?
  • ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra?
689509 military parade 2.jpg
  • ... that the entire army of Liechtenstein consists of 3 soldiers? (Pictured)
  • ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
  • ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace...
  • ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
  • ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
  • ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?
  • ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
  • ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?
Icecream6gyfc2.jpg
  • ... that "crack" is the hood's most effective diet pill? (Pictured)
  • ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
  • ... that Uranus is a gas giant?
  • ... that Abraham Lincoln was an accomplished skateboarder?
  • ... that making drugs explode in your stomach is not a good way to make yourself smarter?
  • ... that within a few weeks of being held in captivity dolphins are able to train humans to stand at the side of a pool and throw them fish?
  • ... that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience?
  • ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra?
689509 military parade 2.jpg
  • ... that the entire army of Liechtenstein consists of 3 soldiers? (Pictured)
  • ... that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
  • ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace...
  • ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
  • ... that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
  • ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?
  • ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
  • ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?

Some stuff i picked up.

CHJpdmF0ZS9sci9pbWFnZXMvd2Vic2l0ZS8yMDIyLTA1L2xvY2dvdHRsaWViMTI1MDEtaW1hZ2UuanBn.jpg
"Come! Come support my tacky AI website!"

Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein FilesWinter Olympicsr/TheDarnold still having a massive field day • NFL fans experiencing withdrawal symptoms with the season now over

Recent deaths: LamontBrad ArnoldNFL season • Lindsay Vonn's legSome kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny titleJames Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) • Robert DuvallKurt Van Dyke (not Dick) • Jesse JacksonYouTubeTom NoonanMcSteamy from Grey's Anatomy (if you're Gen X) or the dad from Euphoria (if you're a Millennial or Gen Z)

Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek) • Quinton Reviews

Upcoming deaths: Donald TrumpNYC's economy • WeedDick van Dyke, eventually • Dancin' Maduro • Aaron Rodgers' career • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files (cough cough Bill and Hillary Clinton) • Travis Kelce • the US government, again • Warner Bros. (?) • A Las Vegas hotel that no one's going to care about

On this day...

Pictured: Your taste in music/television/everything.

February 20: Hot Garbage Day

Today's featured picture

Bad News soup
Just when you thought hospital food couldn't get any worse...

Image credit: Doug
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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