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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Our Dear Leader has inspired us to work on 36,618 articles since opening in 1948. Before editing, please read the Manifesto and browse the Constitution. Korean Workers' Party | Military exercises | Military technology | Soldiers | Juche | Party line The Glory of Korea | ㅆ to ㅋ | Other...

Today's Party Column The Reich thanks you for tuning in to this special broadcast of the Nineteen Thirty-Six Nuremberg Rally! All the beer and sausages in Bavaria can't keep you from this great sport, we know. The proud sponsors of this unequalled event, Otto Eberhardt Patronenfabrik, Fokker, and of course Schuberth Helme GmbH, wish to formally convey their joy in being associated with such an occasion. It's Day Two. Let's join the action! Ladies and gentlemen, this is your favorite official commentator, Irvine Lindenberg. Wow, have we got a race for you! It's a bit back from the front, where Mister Goring is off at his usual insurmountable lead, for fifth position. Yes, it's Erich von dem Bach in his trademark SS uniform, duking it out with Rudolph Hess. Look at those eyebrows! You could hide an entire armoured division in there! Hess is in a 1933 MechlebahnSchtop Roadster, 277 horsepower but prone to sudden breakdown; von dem Bach is suffering, you can clearly see it, under the weight of his two iron crosses as he sits uncomfortably at the wheel of his Überbungdenführer SA 18, manufactured in 1934. It's been back and forth as they burst through this last stretch to a High Command-approved watering hole somewhere in Bavaria. (Full article...) Recently featured: Newport Cigarettes because fuck yeah I'm drunk let's have some fun Category:Portal Highlights Clint Eastwood's Mule Romance of the Three Kingdoms Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history November 25: Feel Vague Anxiety Whilst Examining A Tattoo You Got On A Drunken Impulse Day 1622 - The toasted sandwich is invented in a joint venture by the Earl of Sandwich and the Duke of Toast. 1901 - Ernst Schrödinger, inventor of the Uncertainty Principle, was born on this day. Or was he? 1997 - Princess Diana dies in car crash after driver is distracted by the 'I love Charlie' on her right buttock. 2006 - Europeans give thanks for the farsighted move of kicking Ayn Rand off their continent. 2006 - Rush Limbaugh suffers great embarrassment after an assistant leaks information about his secret tattoo depicting two men engaging in immoral acts. Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is procrastination Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Joleeeene... President Partons turkey (Pictured) Girl remembers breakup song All too well Britpop fan's opinion on the Dexter revival Oscar the Grouch, Bert fired over vaccine mandates Windows 11 JBE will be hitting shelves just in time for Christmas A*Teens reunite 40 years later UnNews' exclusive interview with God R.E.M. members reunite, sign gigantic deal Patrick eats SpongeBob O.J. Simpson to make triumphant return to acting Citizen Kane sucks John Kerry comes out as a horse Supermarket thief: "Donkey Kong told me to" Mike Pence turns into a pickle It is all happening Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned Björk responds to Anti-Asian violence Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup sucks ass Biden responds to North Korea's "Stink" complaints BMI songwriters (but not ASCAP) to receive vaccine Governor Cuomo from New York is screwed Grodin Museum reopens to public Old movies are suddenly offensive Northeast getting another blizzard Just another dead doper and a dirtbag dies Marilyn Manson removed from New Radicals hit Biden will recognize Hillary as 45th President Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"? You cannot deny... ... that in 2007 the Department of Homeland Security released a series of informative pamphlets on surviving a terrorist attack? More wisdom
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Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners You only have 5 (five!) more days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

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