Babel:Nk

로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Our Dear Leader has inspired us to work on 36,025 articles since opening in 1948. Before editing, please read the Manifesto and browse the Constitution. Korean Workers' Party | Military exercises | Military technology | Soldiers | Juche | Party line The Glory of Korea | ㅆ to ㅋ | Other...

Today's Party Column As you are doubtlessly well aware, gypsies have been reading tea leaves for years with amazingly accurate results. Much like the reading of tea leaves, scatomancy studies the size, arrangement, colour, and interaction of bowel movements in the toilet bowl to predict secrets of the future, and give guidance to major life decisions. Now, through the marvels of technology, you can brush up on your ancient clairvoyant skills in the privacy of your very own commode! What will happen today? Is romance just around the corner? Will I get that promotion? All of these answers can truly come from 'within yourself'. In the past, seers would attempt to peer into the future by means of lots of methods. Some of the most popular methods would involve Cleromancy: the scattering of objects, such as dice, or rocks, and interpreting the results according to set principles. Scryomancy denotes divination by means of a bowl. Scatomancy, in this sense, is a form of scryomancy, for it also makes use of a bowl. (Full article...) Recently featured: Albert Einstein Tour de France Social Credit System Elon Musk Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history August 10: Vatican Mardi Gras 1479 - Pope Sixtus IV inaugurates Vatican Mardi Gras, a celebration of sexuality which is the only day of the year that Catholics are allowed to celebrate sex, dress provocatively, engage in sexual intercourse, expose themselves to crowds, and drink from extremely tall, thin vessels. 1675 - The foundation stone of the Royal Greenwich Observatory in London got laid. It was happy all day. 1829 - Pius VIII initiates the tradition of throwing beads to nuns and screaming "Show us your tits!". (pictured) 1914 - Pope Pius X is killed in a collision between carnival floats. The driver had become distracted after Pius threw beads to a group of nuns. 1989 - Pope John Paul II flashes a crowd of thoroughly appalled onlookers in Rome. 1992 - Girls Gone Wild: Cardinal Sins is released in the United States to critical acclaim. Gene Shalit declares it to be "one of the best movies released today." 2009 - Pope Benedict XVI enjoyed a massive gay sex party with all the other Popes. Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is procrastination Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK "I'm a woman, yes. I'm strong. I'm Strong Woman." Biden selects Strong Woman as running mate (Pictured) UnNews remembers Ennio Morricone Supreme Court to David Byrne: "This is not your beautiful wife" The Big Bang Theory pulled for being pizza-face Your favorite show is renewed for 9th season The Police shorten band name to "The" over controversy TV's Cops cancelled 25 years too late Pink Floyd killed by coronavirus Kalifornische Beamte erklären das Ego von Elon Musk für wesentlich Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization Your cat's gonna kill you Christof from The Truman Show dies aged 74 Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that you should accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, today! You cannot deny... ... that individuals born under the sign of Gemini are often flammable and vulnerable to bear attacks? More wisdom
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Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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