The Jetsons

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Here's The Jetsons watching porn...of Astro!

The Jetsons was a prime-time documentary produced by Hanna-Barbera. It aired Sunday nights on ABC in the 1960s.

It was Hanna-Barbera’s space age counterpart to The Flintstones. Like the former show, it is a half-hour documentary on a bizarre American subculture and lifestyle.[I am not kidding] While the Flintstones documented a cult which used machines powered by birds and dinosaurs, the Jetsons live in a retrofuturistic cult that claims to be from the year 2062[Why don't you get a life already?] of elaborate robotic contraptions, aliens, holograms, and whimsical inventions. The series ended when the FBI raided the compound during filming, leaving 27 dead, 18 injured, and enough controversy to force the show to be cancelled even though production of the second season had already begun.

The show received high ratings during its initial broadcast,[1] which ultimately led to a revival, of sorts, in the 1980s. The revival only lasted two seasons and is generally perceived to have been of a lower quality, as they had ditched the documentary format, and instead hired actors to follow scripts typed by the same stupid monkeys who wrote the complete works of William Shakespeare.[2]

Setting[edit]

Have you seen this man?

The show takes place in the American city of New Chicago in the year 2062. George Jetson works for Spacely who now owns half of Chicago (The owner of the other half is never specified, but it is occasionally implied to be Astro). Jane, his wife, is a 32 year old stay-at-home mother who drinks 1/2 a gallon of wine a day and openly admits that she can't drink a full gallon without flirting with the house plants. Their 16 year old daughter Judy goes to High School where she dates the elderly principal. Her 2 year old son, Elroy, goes to the Little Dipper School.

The Characters[edit]

  • George Jetson; An odd fellow, George is an outspoken man, whose hobbies include listening to jazz and getting fired from his job. He is currently failing his GED.
  • Jane Jetson; Married to George Jetson, Jane spends her days at home watching Oprah reruns and binge drinking. Occasionally she goes to the mall with her daughter, Judy Jetson, to hit on the underage boys. In the third episode, she gets banned from Detroit.
  • Judy Jetson; The promiscuous sixteen year old daughter of George and Jane. Initially a boy-crazy lunatic, she mellowed out considerably after she began dating her principal. She is a natural brunette.
  • Elroy "Leroy" Jetson; Judy's two year old son, conceived with an unidentified male. He spends his days at Little Dipper Middle School, and his nights at home, where he enjoys feeding his grandpa dangerous radioactive waste.
  • Lee Sanders; The normal one. He knew everything about supercomputers, A.I, and getting banned from Sharper Image. His dream was to go to New Harvard University. He perished during the F.B.I raid.
  • Astro; The famiy dog. He is believed to be a descendant of Scoobert D. Doo. Not much is known about him, although it appears there is more to him than meets the eye. He may have mafia connections, seeing as on at least one occasion the don calls off a hit on George after seeing him with Astro. He is the current owner of the New York Knicks.
  • Rosie; The Jetson's maid. Her mysterious origins are a running gag. She keeps to herself most of the time, so not much is known about her personal life, although her room is full of posters of circuitry and cans of WD40. She is wanted for questioning in Cogswell's disappearance.
  • RUDI; Only appeared in one hilarious episode.[3] He[I am not kidding] is George's computer and only friend. Used exclusively for solitaire, he[I am not kidding] died when George reformatted his[I am not kidding] hard drive in a misguided effort to reset the high score.
  • Spacely; Best known for his odd choice of facial hair, Spacely owns half of New Chicago where everyone lives 1000 feet above Sea Level and has flying cars. He never looks down at the people who live in Old Chicago because he finds them unattractive.
  • Orbity; An alien that Elroy adopted. Late in the series, Astro put him in charge of a puppet government.

The TV Show[edit]

The Jetsons first aired in 1962 when Bill Hanna and Joe Barbera met a delusional nutcase who referred to himself as Marty McFly[4] who claimed that back in 1955 he witnessed the year 2055 with his own two-eyes. They initially ignored him, but he persisted. After hours of inane rambling, he offered to show them where he lived. This intrigued them, and they allowed him to give them a tour of his compound. They discussed the cultists' bizarre lifestyle and decided that it would make a great, thought-provoking documentary.

When the Jetsons met the Flinstones[edit]

After a night of binge-drinking, George and Astro wound up in the distant past where they met the Flintstones. George and Astro immediately saw an opportunity to use their knowledge of the future for personal gain, and quickly invented the piano key necktie, among other less important things. It was all going smooth until the Flintstone's car decided it wanted everyone to go back to their own time[5]

References[edit]

  1. this was later attributed to some jerk hoarding Neilsen boxes
  2. more commonly known as Ol' Shakey
  3. and three episodes from the revival
  4. real name Joseph Hairydong
  5. This is actually pretty close to what really happened