Kenneth
He knows the Frequency. Find him. Find him and destroy him.
Pertinent Information[edit | edit source]
Kenneth M̶c̶D̶u̶f̶f̶ is a middle-aged man who resides in Manhattan. You will find him walking late at night through Midtown. We have reason to believe that he has been and continues to be in contact with several major intelligence operatives. He keeps the Frequency in his very teeth! Not too close, now... you don't know whether they could be watching.
In the mid 1970s Kenneth was spotted in the very heart of the Vietcong wilderness, wearing only his own urine. The tribes there worshipped him as a god. He knows what you're thinking; he has the Frequency. You must not reveal yourself to him!
If all else fails, remember your pocketbook! Fill your heart with its golden leaves!!!
Plan of Attack[edit | edit source]
Kenneth, now, he's a wily one. If you walk behind him, he'll snap your neck, I swear to god I've seen him do it. Instead you must adopt the ways of the Ninja! Replace your blood with kidney beans, he cannot smell them! Do not think about him! Think only of raspberries!
When you face him, remember: No matter what, do not relinquish control of your weapon! It is your key to victory, and the salvation of mankind. Only when you devour his very soul will humanity be safe!
Godspeed, fair reader! Do what must be done!