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Welcome to The House of Pomegranates, the collection of short stories that is intended neither for the British child nor the British public.


Oscar Wilde has inspired us to work on 39,609 stories and plays since opening in January 2005.

Before modifying any of Wilde's works, please read the snooty writing guidelines and homo-acceptance manual.

Browse:

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Oscar's Picks | Straight Index | Works in other Genres...


Another Oscar Wilde picture. From:

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Chastity is a calling higher than marriage, and spiritually more profitable.

Oscar's Chosen Article

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She was one hundred sixteen years old and different from other girls. She wasn't notably pretty and was socially awkward. She was the only alien in her school, which didn't help her feelings of exclusion. But the tolerant people of her town for the most part saw past her glowing blue skin.

Despite this all, she was in with the popular girls. Guys were cordial with her but nothing more. Drunken jocks at parties often dared each other to score with the alien chick. "Fifty bucks for the bro who scores some Pluto pussy" they said. They always failed. At parties she was so socially awkward that any guy coming near her would set off blue LED like lights in her cheeks. It is a biological trait Plutonian females have. It instantly freaks out any guy who gets near her. (Full article...)

You can suggest articles for Oscar to read.

More of Oscar's picks


Why was I born with such contemporaries?

Handsome, boy does he know it

April 16: 42nd Josef Stalin Appreciation Day (World)


The history of the United Kingdom

The one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it.


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The face of HATE!

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, and DeltaruneEurovisionRussian InvasionIsrael-Palestine conflictDOGE budget cuts • Everyone ditching some Disney live-action remake for A Minecraft MovieTrump and Xi's tariff games • Americans scrambling last-minute to pay their taxes

Recent deaths: Meghan Markle's Netflix show • Kurt from Good BurgerGeorge Foreman23andMeBruce GloverRichard ChamberlainRoger Daltrey's eyes and earsVal KilmerYoon Suk Yeol's presidency and freedom • Your 401KJay North • The playoff bids of all New York State NHL teams

Upcoming deaths: U.S. and Global Economy • Luigi MangioneKate MiddletonLaura PalmerDEIColumbus Blue Jackets' playoff chances • Gawr Gura


Today in London


It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information, so did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's playwrights:

  • ... that Alaska's principle exports include snow, ice, frozen water, and permafrost?


Read on

This Month's Wit

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.

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For Oscar-related chatter, see this room to talk about Oscar.

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