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You are wasting this internet site's time. You should be writing something, but instead you are just sitting there, waiting for it to entertain you. You could even be the Time Magazine Person of the Year. Don't you have any sense of responsibility? How can you live with yourself? Think about all the times you've laughed heartily at some passing rejoinder in the forums, guffawed mightily at a clever turn of phrase on your talkpage, or even politely smiled at some article during your favorite Uncyclopedia program: HumorSearch. Don't you think you owe it to this wiki to put in at least a semblance of effort to return the favor? You should cease and desist all extraneous and benign activity and write an article. (Full article...)
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DID U KNOE...
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- ... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing?
- ... that Earth, Wind & Fire have produced a multi-season autobiography?
- ... that wearing a Top Hat is not only a sound fashion choice, it gives you somewhere to hide candy?
- ... that the world will beat a path to your door if you build a better Mousetrap?
- ... that the brainrot is taking oveBRR BRR PATAPIM, IL MIO CAPPELO E PIENO DI SLIM! TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG SAHUR! BOMBARDINO CROCODILO!
- ... that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
- ... that the police are at your door?
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In the news
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Too bad you can't customize this in the original.
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ON DIS DAI...
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February 7: Shit! I Forgot My Lines... Day
- 1599 - Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio, a man of uhh, shit. Line. Line, I need the—
- 1600 - A man of Infinite Jest. Of most excellent fancy. Wait, asshole.
- 1601 - Yeah, got it. Ahem. I knew him Horatio, a man of infinite jest. Of most fancy—Fuck—of most excellent fancy.
- 1602 - If this happens on the night we'll just use the alternate.
- 1603 - How about you go fuck yourself, I'm the artist around here, you just tell people where to move on stage.
- 1604 - Whatever, Kenneth Branagh, you do whatever you fucking want.
- 1605 - I don't need you, nobody needs you, I'll make my own fucking lines. I'm the fucking bard. Motherfucker.
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| COLONIZASHUN OV TEH WEEK
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For the glory of her majesty
HALP US CLEAR TEH IVY OV CRAP,
AN PLANT TEH SEEDZ OV HUMOR.
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WRITR AN N00B OV TEH MONTH
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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
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UNCYCLOPEDIAS SISTR PROJECTZ
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| Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.
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UNCYCLOPEDIA LANGUAGEZ
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| This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,111 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Lolcat!:
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