Babel:Lolcat

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WELCOM 2 LOLPEDIA,
TEH CONTENT-FREE ENCYCLOPEDIA DAT ANY1 CAN EDIT.
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For every 10 production workers a company has, there needs to be at least one employee who stands there with his arms folded and watches them. However, in modern times, it's not uncommon to have a single yet highly devoted control freak to supervise scores of employees. HowTo: Be A Production Manager is the perfect guide for anyone who finds themselves thrown into this lucrative position through nepotism, extortion or influential friends.

A Production Manager essentially acts as the liaison between the office staff and the dregs of society known as production workers. The unpleasant part of the job is that sales and management are able to use you as the focal point of their rage, due to the inherent responsibilities of the position, and the traditional purpose of the Production Manager is to transfer that abuse to the bottom of the employee food chain. When you play your cards right, everyone will be fighting amongst themselves and the winds of blame shall never touch your sails. (Full article...)

DID U KNOE...

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  • ... that women get periods, but men get commas?
  • ... that dihydrogen monoxide can kill you, specially if you breathe it?
  • ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
  • ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
  • ... that individuals born under the sign of Gemini are often flammable and vulnerable to bear attacks?
  • ... that Ben Stiller's face makes everything funny?
  • ... that one person can change the world, but the admins will probably just revert it?
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  • ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else?
  • ... that contrary to popular belief, the emoticon ":3" is a depiction of someone with a scrotum for a mouth?
  • ... that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"?
  • ... You can do anything with creativity, determination, and the exploitation of the working class?
  • ... that every single day, we breathe enough air to continue living?
  • ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane?
  • ... that a bird in the hand is better than crabs in your bush?
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  • ... that the Easter Bunny must kill every 100 years? (Pictured)
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  • ... that contrary to popular belief, the emoticon ":3" is a depiction of someone with a scrotum for a mouth?
  • ... that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
  • ... that the Kingfisher does not dine exclusively on kings, but also hunts queens, emperors, princes, dukes, viceroys and any other high-ranking members of the nobility?
  • ... that in 1933, the US Supreme Court accidentally repealed the 19th Amendment instead of the 18th Amendment, causing FDR - who abused Eleanor while he was in a wheelchair - to be reelected three more times due to women being banned from voting in the 1930's and 1940's?
  • ... that you have probably broken at least three of the Ten Commandments just by visiting this website?
  • ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
  • ... that 100% of people who are rushed to the hospital will die?
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  • ... that tickle fights are a common occurrence in soccer? (Pictured)
  • ... that there is no consensus among experts on vice presidential history that Al Gore exists?
  • ... that Earth is the best planet in the world?
  • ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores?
  • ... that half of all American schoolchildren graduate in the bottom 50% of their class?
  • ... that Jackson Pollock is the Jackson Pollock of painting?
  • ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
  • ... that those suspicious white spots on your professor's blazer are in fact mayonnaise?

In the news

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He literally fought nail and tooth for Team America

Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Filesr/TheDarnold still having a massive field day • NFL fans experiencing withdrawal symptoms with the season now over • Team Canada rethinking life

Recent deaths: Brad ArnoldNFL season • Winter OlympicsSome kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny titleJames Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) • Robert DuvallKurt Van Dyke (not Dick) • Jesse JacksonYouTubeTom NoonanEric DaneMelania Trump's big movie star career • Team Canada hockey, twice, AND their curling team

Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek) • Quinton Reviews

Upcoming deaths: Donald TrumpNYC's economy and snow handling capability • WeedDick van Dyke, eventually • Dancin' MaduroIran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files • the US government, again • Warner Bros. (?) • A Las Vegas hotel that no one's going to rememberMexico

ON DIS DAI...

Justice for Han

February 23: Vin Diesel Saying the Word "Family" Day

COLONIZASHUN OV TEH WEEK
For the glory of her majesty
HALP US CLEAR TEH IVY OV CRAP,
AN PLANT TEH SEEDZ OV HUMOR.

TODAIS FEATURD PICCHUR

"tihs" is funny
Never underestimate the power of the dwarf.

Image credit: Modusoperandi
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

RESENT ARTICLEZ

MOAR RESENT ARTICLEZ | MOST WANTD PAGEZ | REQUESTD REWRITEZ | ADD 2 STUBS | LONELY PAGEZ | PEE REVIEW | TRY WRITIN BOUT... | STUCK ARTICLEZ NEEDIN PUSH | GREAT IDEAS

WRITR AN N00B OV TEH MONTH

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You only have 5 (five!) more days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

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