~ Captain Obvious on SF.
Sexual frustration is a disease commonly found in men. If you are worried that a man you know may suffer from this sometimes terminal disease, then before consulting your local GP, check that he has at least two of the following symptoms:
- He has regular trips to the supermarket, to buy toiletries
- He often sits at his computer watching educational videos
- You have caught him browsing the website for Fleshlights
Often, when viewing a member of the public, a man with this disease can lose his dignity by resorting to getting his dong out, and dribbling on her bra. Also, taking one off the hand in public is very common for the unfortunate sufferers. As sexual frustration is a disease, it can quite easily be spread. The usual methods of contracting this disease are coughing, sneezing, close physical contact, breathing, raping, and sometimes even just a long stare. Because of this you must employ constant vigilance, and always carry a condom/tissue/biography of Jesus on your person.
Are you a sufferer?
Well, if you think you are, then you shouldn't be reading this article! Go and get some help. See the diagram on the right for ideas as to exactly how you should go about doing this.
Books to Read
Movies to see
- The Rapid and The Ragey; Uncle Vin gives you a few tips on how to get the ladies.
- 2 Girls 1 Calculus Equation; Who said maths won't help you get laid!?