Missing White Girl Syndrome

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Patty Hearst (pictured) was held captive by the Canadian Liberation Front, where she was infected with Stockholm Syndrome.

“I have never missed a white girl. Ever.”

~ Noel Coward on Missing White Girl Syndrome

Missing White Girl Syndrome or otherwise known as MWGS is the condition when the media unreacts to an attractive young female kidnapping. The liberal media never mentions who the kidnapper is, but it is always the fault of former communist President Bill Clinton.

Lucky there are members of the liberal media who make up false statements in order to have Clinton arrested for the murders of thousands of innocent women. Due to the nature that the missing girls are usually hot it is diffcult for the media to pick up on their story.

Why the White Girls get more attention[edit | edit source]

White girls have DNA not found in other races that makes them prone to media attention. Scientists have isolated the gene and injected the gene into people like Shawn Hornbeck. The gene also is linked with skin color and not with eye, nose, hair, face, etc. Also, some people think white girls and cuter than other girls. Sometimes, I agree.

As with many of the sub-species Attention Whore (homo agnitio agnitius) White Girls have an innate ability to attract media attention to a much greater extent than other racial types.

Why the Fat Blacks Chicks get no attention[edit | edit source]

Fat Black Chicks get no attention because for three very good reasons. One, they are fat. Two, they are black and suffer from a condition known as being black people. Three, they are in fact not chicks. Since the black chicks lack the media DNA they cannot get on CNN or the fair and balanced network know as Fox News.

See Also[edit | edit source]