Road Rage
PICK A FUCKING SIDE, ASSWIT! Anyways, road rage is what happens when THESE FUCKTARDS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE! MAYBE GRADUATE PRESCHOOL BEFORE YOU DRIVE THAT THING, YOU FEDORA-WEARING, KAZOO-PUNCHING, PURPLE-AND-GREEN-STRIPED FUCKPAD! As I was saying, when mommy and daddy really love each- Oh, sorry, wrong article. So road rage is what happens when somebody driving bothers another driver. It is a very serious thing, and should be TAKE YOUR GODDAMN SIGNAL OFF, YA MOTHERFUCKER! Like I was saying, it should be avoided at all costs. Life is precious after all. DIE YOU USELESS CYCLIST! YOU'RE TAKING UP THE WHOLE FUCKING LANE, DICK-ASSED FACE-HEAD!
Causes
Road Rage is caused by MY UNBORN FUCKING BABY CAN DRIVE BETTER THAN YOU, SHITSTAIN! *ahem* People thinking they're better than every other driver on the road. In most scenarios, the rager is the worse driver, like this fucker BEHIND ME! DAMNIT, QUIT GOING SO SLOW, DICK-ASSED FACE-HEAD! Woah, almost hit that group of children there. Don't contribute to this by being a SHIT DRIVER! PICK A FUCKING SIDE, PIZZA-COVERED LAWN CHAIR!
Results
Road ragers are often some of the most intelligent people on Earth, unlike THIS RETARD! ARE YOU DRIVING A FUCKING LAWNMOWER? SPEED IT UP, ASSCLOWN! They will not hesitate to fuck your shit up. Majorly. Most road ragers are very determined, and will not stop pursuing an aggressor for several hundred miles, like this TAILGATING FUCK! GET OFF THE DAMN ROAD, YOU DIAPERWIT! .
WHAT'S THIS FUCKER DOING?!
Hey, you in the piece-of-shit '97 Corolla! Yeah, you! GOING 80 ON THESE TWISTY LITTLE ROADS? GET TORN TO SHREDS BY A FUCKING BEAR, ASSCLOWN! You wanna fucking go?!? WHAT THE HELL? WHY THE FUCK DID YOU RUN ME OFF THE ROAD?!? I'LL FUCKING KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING ASKED FOR IT,ASSBLASTER! GET READY TO SAY GOODNIGHT! Wait, is that a fucking KNIFE?! Hey no need to get aggressive. I just wanted to have a civil conversation.[Citation desprately needed] WHY, GOD, WHY? HEY, WHAT'S THAT FUCKER IN THE FORD F-150 DOING?! DRIVE OFF A FUCKING BRIDGE, YOU ASSTARD! Wait, NOOOO! LET'S TALK THIS THROUGH!!! NOT THE HANDS! WHAT THE FUCK! WHY THE FUCKING WINDOW? YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT COST ME FAGGOT?!!? OH, GOD IT HURTS!! OW OW OW OW! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAA-
See also
 | Article written in the style of its subject This article is funny because it is written in the real or imagined writing style of its subject. If you do not find it funny, it is because you are an ignorant cultural philistine on account of having not consumed the same media the writer has. Shame on you. |
- Articles with unsourced statements
- Automobiles
- Cars
- Things on wheels
- Crime
- Pages that look like the things they're about
- Really Angry People
- Rage
- People Who Need an Asskicking
- Profanity
- The Al Pacino Academy of Shouting
- Bat Fuck Insane
- Things you'll find wandering the streets of New York City
- People who want to destroy all things
- People who wanted to be like William Shakespeare but failed
- Twat Bastard
- Murder
- FA Transport
- FA Crime
- FA Pages that look like the things they're about
- Featured
- Top 10 Articles of 2025