Protected page

Road Rage

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Road rage)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
You think you're so cool, in your little piss-fueled fuckwagon? DAMNIT, QUIT GOING SO SLOW, ASSBLASTER!

PICK A FUCKING SIDE, ASSWIT! Anyways, road rage is what happens when THESE FUCKTARDS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE! TAKE YOUR GODDAMN SIGNAL OFF, YA FUCK UDDER! As I was saying, when mommy and daddy really love each- Oh, sorry, wrong article. So road rage is what happens when somebody driving bothers another driver. It is a very serious thing, and should be STAY IN THE LINES, FUCK UDDER! LIKE A FUCKING COLORING BOOK! Like I was saying, it should be avoided at all costs. Life is precious after all. DIE YOU USELESS CYCLIST! YOU'RE TAKING UP THE WHOLE FUCKING LANE, MOUSECOCK!

Causes

Often a result of road rage. YOU HEAR THAT, YOU DICKFACE? MY UNBORN FUCKING BABY CAN DRIVE BETTER THAN YOU, UNEMPLOYED ASSWIPE!

Road Rage is caused by YOU TRYING TO NASCAR THIS AND CAUSE A CRASH, YOU ASSDICK?! *ahem* People thinking they're better than every other driver on the road. In most scenarios, the rager is the worse driver, like this fucker BEHIND ME! GET OUT OF THE FUCKING ROAD, ASSWALLLOP! Woah, almost hit that group of children there. Don't contribute to this by being a SHIT DRIVER! GET ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK! YOU HEARD ME! KNEES TO CHEST, POOP NOSE!


Results

Flip me off, eh, you little fuckferret? I'll fucking show you! MY UNBORN FUCKING BABY CAN DRIVE BETTER THAN YOU, RASIN DICK!

Road ragers are often some of the most intelligent people on Earth, unlike THIS RETARD! MAYBE GRADUATE PRESCHOOL BEFORE YOU DRIVE THAT THING, YOU JACKHOLE! They will not hesitate to fuck your shit up. Majorly. Most road ragers are very determined, and will not stop pursuing an aggressor for several hundred miles, like this TAILGATING FUCK! STAY IN THE LINES, TURKEY BURGER! LIKE A FUCKING COLORING BOOK! .

Some drivers carry turtles in their cars.

WHAT'S THIS FUCKER DOING?!

Hey, you in the piece-of-shit '97 Corolla! Yeah, you! PEDAL TO THE FUCKING METAL, YOU FEDORA-WEARING, KAZOO-PUNCHING, PURPLE-AND-GREEN-STRIPED FUCKPAD! You wanna fucking go?!? WHAT THE HELL? WHY THE FUCK DID YOU RUN ME OFF THE ROAD?!? I'LL FUCKING KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING ASKED FOR IT, ARSEBISCUT! GET READY TO SAY GOODNIGHT! Wait, is that a fucking KNIFE?! Hey no need to get aggressive. I just wanted to have a civil conversation.[Citation desprately needed] WHY, GOD, WHY? HEY, WHAT'S THAT FUCKER IN THE FORD F-150 DOING?! TAKE YOUR GODDAMN SIGNAL OFF, YA FEDORA-WEARING, KAZOO-PUNCHING, PURPLE-AND-GREEN-STRIPED FUCKPAD! Wait, NOOOO! LET'S TALK THIS THROUGH!!! NOT THE HANDS! WHAT THE FUCK! WHY THE FUCKING WINDOW? YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT COST ME FAGGOT?!!? OH, GOD IT HURTS!! OW OW OW OW! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAA-

Blood Spatter.jpg

See also

Potatohead aqua.png
Featured version: 6 October 2025
This article has been featured on the front page. You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.Template:FA/06 October 2025Template:FA/2025Template:FQ/06 October 2025Template:FQ/2025