Tax fraud

FBI WARNING TO THE PAGE VIEWER

You goddamn un-American piece of shit, we finally found you! After 12 years of treating your taxes more like a suggestion, and less like something as important as breathing, we've got your fat ass, you cocksucker. Did you really think Uncle Sam was just gonna forget you owed him $1.57? Think again, moron, because you're in a HEAP of trouble now! When Uncle Sam wants his money, Uncle Sam gets his money. The nerve of people like you to withhold what he so righteously asks from you for every day of your life, from every purchase in your life. And you have the gall, the hutzpah to run away like a weak little bitch ass rat back to this place, your den. And what is this fucking place anyway, some kind of safe haven for tax evaders like yourself? Hell, this place is probably FULL of foul degenerates, criminals, low-lifes, and all round dirty, scummy, evil, sneaky, and rotten rat bastards like yourself! You all make me sick! Legally speaking, I have to say 'probably' make me sick. Ok, scanning your IP now... aaaaand... gotcha! We'll be there in a few minutes you fat fuck, and you'd better hope Deputy Nate Higgers' AR-15 is jammed with Hubba Bubba Bubblegum again, or else you might just be breathing through a new set of holes! They're gonna make a t-shirt outta you... oh, who the fuck am I kidding, nobody is going to remember you ever existed, you tax evading little rodent. Hey, what's that noise? You're crying? Well, save some tears for later, because you've got a severe case of lead deficiency our boys in black and blue are gonna have to fix up the old-fashioned way!
Now, open up, you fucking rat!
Up yours,

-the FBI

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