Ford Ka

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Ever seen one of these in your streets?

Ford Ka is a small hatchback-crap car, with others in the same category being Ford Fiesta and Ford Pinto.

Ford Ka is present in many 3rd world countries, since it's presence in the USA has been forbidden. Ford Ka can barely manage to move it's weight mass from the ground, because it has a weak motorization. With the average weight world-wide going way high in numerical terms, there is a risk of a messy experience with fat adults.

The Original Concept for Ford Ka[edit | edit source]

Unhappily Ford Ka is a a project gone wrong from Ford Motor Co. Besides it actually resembling a car, it is in fact an archived project for a textile vapor-machine that would be made for Toyota in the twentieth century when the ``zapanese´´ used to make clothing products.

Although the engine can be very economic, it was supposed to combust coal and generate heat for the machinery, but not produce mechanical movement, or, layman's term, making the car move. That's why it can carry a thin man, 4 passengers and a flea-circus (supposing each person weights around 70 pounds).

Ford Ka motorization[edit | edit source]

Even with electronic injection this car can't make it out of it's first steps. Probably you'll weight more than the car itself, fat ass. As I was saying, to make this thing get out of the initial point, there is a technique of getting out of the car, putting all the strenght you can in your feet, push a Ford Ka door, and praying "Oh god give me strenght". When you hear a loud noise, but not that loud, ressembling a beaver tooth gnawing a tree, you probably can enjoy the ride.

Ford Motor Co projects in the origin of Ford Kaka

While driving this piece of Ford KRap, you will enjoy a 5 mile ride, when thinking into straights. The fuel capacity on it is so low, that you can buy a optional plastic bottle and fill it up with gas, to complement the actual capacity of your Ford Ka. Since it dies everytime, you need to be careful when going on slopes higher than 20 degrees, as the only ride you'll be taking is the highway to hell, with your Ford Krapped going downhill saying "Huff-puff, I'm tired".

Ford Ka and South America[edit | edit source]

Place that everyone like, South America is the primary place to keep seeing these automobiles. From Peru (turkey!!) to Ecuador, From Argentina to Brazil (lots of "bundas"), the only thing the landscape displays are a whole lot of Ford Kashits. Give me a break.

Poor Ford Ka wasn't well received in any place it was displayed. This charriot posses more uses as a dog house, hobo home or to simply be left put into the junkyard with old Bill O' Benny and his even redneck dog. Yee-a Yee-a Yo.

Ford Ka for the po'[edit | edit source]

Ford Ka for the po's (poors) a project made by Ford Motor Co. Since there were overproduction of this automobile, the company started giving away undone Ford Ka to the mass. In exchange people needed to bring their mother-in-law, kids and/or any other companion. If the car could hold them and not break up, Ford Motor Co would achieve happy people and give away a chassis of a vehicle. The motorization of chooses would be Ford Motor Co "beavertooth" engines (original vapor-machine engine for Toyota, same project from 1911) or "tri-combustor" engines with three carburators and a V8 engine (imported directly from US, which was infact just Ford Maverick's motors, refurbished of course, for your/ours latin cousins).

Since it didn't always worked out all right, the casuality factor in many countries actually went high, thanks to people getting smashed by "metallic parts" while inside Ford Kapengas, generating high "tax of mortality" in babies and overall satisfaction of Ford Motor Co getting below imaginated ever.

This little guy wasn't satisfied with his family Ford Ka, thus scolding henry. Circa 1915.

The downfall of Ford Ka[edit | edit source]

Ford Ka finished being produced in the end of time (more precisevely in 3:48 PM Central U.S. Time, May 14, 9,020,364 A.D.) The overload of Ford Ka all around scattered in 3rd world cities made it be considered rubbish. Now it is part of many scenarios, predictively in the area of "Andes", Peru (turkey!!).

Ford Ka is the predescessor of Ford Focus, thus, another unsucesful line of car from Ford Motor Co.

My ford KA got banned from british pubs for smoking.
"I had owned my Ka for 3 weeks before I realised what it was." A quote from "A famous teapot." a book sorting out the long lasting
fable about what a ford ka is and what you can do with it once you have come to terms with it. The follow up book was "Oh dear
what have I done." This book covered what you do after you have done what you did with your Ford Ka, the book was also published in
German and was given the title "Mein Kampf." and then re-published as "Ein Kamp." as it appealed to the Ford Ka owners more.

See also[edit | edit source]