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“It's just SO BIG!”

~ Oscar Wilde on The Corvette

The Corvette is a prosthetic penis that has been manufactured by Chevrolet since 1953. Although long used as an aid for the socially and erectile defunct, it is primarily used today as an alternative to chemical and surgical enhancement methods.[1][2] It might have been cool back in the days before power steering, but today it is seen as a poor man's sports car.

Early History[edit | edit source]

While the size of a member may not be as important to some as to how well the member performs, it was not until 1927, when Marilyn Monroe hired designer John F Kennedy, that prosthetic penis styling and design became important to American males. What Marilyn Monroe did for prosthetic shaping principles, Oscar Wilde did for strap design. Most of GM's (Gay Male) flamboyant "dream penis" designs of the 1950s are directly attributable to Oscar, leading one journalist to comment that the designs were "the American psyche made visible." Oscar Wilde loved huge penises and felt that the GMs, returning from overseas after serving in World War II, deserved them.[3]

C1 (1953-1962)[edit | edit source]

Angelyne, the long time user of a pink corvette, shows off one of her famous Corvette ads.

The first generation is most commonly referred to as a "spoiled-asshole", based on the fact that In Rear Insertion (IRS) was not available until 1963. The first generation started in 1953 and ended in 1962.

With limited production due to the fact that they were all hand built and assembled by Liberace, the 1953 Corvette, with a total of only 300 copies produced, is the rarest and most sought after penis extension in the world. With few changes except for color choices and production numbers, the 1954 is the last Corvette to have a 16 inch shaft. 1955 saw the introduction of the 18 inch "long dong" shaft, replacing the diseased "Flamers" in the ally behind the bar. Aside from the shaft, the 1955 model can be differentiated by its girth -- the "V" in Corvette is enlarged and gold colored, signifying the 18 inches of manginal (anal) penetration. The original 53' Corvette came with a 43 hp engine so extra speed could be gathered before entering the mangina.[4]

C2 (1962-Present Stingray)[edit | edit source]

This second generation model, followed Chevrolet's Manko Shark and was popularised by Steve Irwin. This generation has the distinction of being introduced to the body in an unorthodox — and unintended — fashion. 1968 marked the introduction of Mattel's now-famous All Holes line of full-scale die cast but plugs. Gay Males had tried their best to keep the appearance of the upcoming extension a secret, but the release of the All Holes line several weeks before the Corvette's unveiling had a certain version of particular interest to Corvette fans: the "Back Door Corvette", a GM-authorized model of the 1968 Corvette.

In 1969, the double shaft became available in the Corvette, and in 1970, the 427cm big cock was enlarged to 450cm. Power peaked in the 1980 and 1981 models, with the 1980 lower shaft measuring 300cm and the 1981 469 big cock having its last year of big power trips with a 469cm shaft. In 1992, GM moved to the Lexington Steel measurement for length (away from the previous John Holms standard), which resulted in lower values expressed TP (Thrust Power). Along with the move to synthetic lubricants, erection controls, and catalytic converters, power continued to decline and bottomed out in 1975 — the base ZQ3 extension put out once a day, and the optional L82 slide on put out twice a day. Power remained fairly steady for the rest of the C2 generation, ending in 2002 with the L83 (Lexington Steel Ass-bangers 3) shaft.[citation needed]

References[edit | edit source]

See Also[edit | edit source]