“They just buy stuff from Mitsubishi and sell it as their own huh?”
“I have simple tastes, I just won't buy a Proton.”
Proton (pronounced as Porn-tonne, Potong, Tronton, Megatron, Pr0nton, Pootong, Poon-Tang, Plotong, Tin Kosong or Shitbox ) is the first and original national car manufacturer of Malaysia. Like nearly all things made in Malaysia, they are made to be pure shit. Unlike Perodua who claim to be the number 1 national car manufacturer of Malaysia, they are actually a conspiracy, a betrayal and a big time spy from Toyota and Daihatsu. Proton is actually an insidious Malaysian Government's agency which is secretly helping the undeserving Malaysian to own a damn fucking car, no matter how wrecked it is. 894 people all around the world die everyday because they were driving Proton cars. (Maybe more)
Proton sells metal buckets with 4 wheels that really can move, that are re-badged and assembled from damaged and faulty old Mitsubishi models, and made it shittier. No crash test ever made to proof the safety due to budget constraint. The only problem: Almost every consumer will have a stiff neck after continually reversing the car for 3 hours a day. Thanks to the overall stupidity of Malaysian consumers, until today most of them haven't realized that their 'national' vehicle that they're driving is actually a Mitsubishi. The slogan for Proton is Dare To Change, which suits the company well because they dare to change the Mitsubishi model badges and then claim those cars as their own.
Apart from that, Proton are believed to be the original inventors of, and the builders of a car bumper from thick cardboard that gets broken easily unlike others. It is believed that when you buy a Proton car, you are required to sign a death warrant for you and your family in order for the company to prevent multiple lawsuits.
- 1 The Great Proton Cars
- 2 Proton's Power
- 3 The Proud Owner of Lotus
- 4 Proton in The World
- 5 Proton Car Models
- 6 Rumor/Concept/Prototype Car
- 7 Proton Motorsporting Division (R3)
- 8 Buy Proton if you're Patriotic
- 9 The Automotive Globalization
- 10 Protect me more please
- 11 Their biggest enemy after Pedoduck
- 12 People on Proton
The Great Proton Cars[edit | edit source]
The Proton Saga was the first 'car' introduced to the unsuspecting public in 1985 which is still sold even today with its over
21 24 28-year old Mitsubishi engine and chassis. The earliest models were actually very robust and reliable, because very little changes were made to the re-badged Japanese cars. People liked Proton that time and wanted better cars in the future. However, the idiots in EON decided that they wanted to make extra profit by cutting production costs - screw what their consumers want, they say. Ergo, they replaced the high-quality Japanese chassis parts with third-hand (s)crap materials from China, Vietnam and Botswana, so that they can charge the costumers the same exact price with the newer, far crappier editions of their Proton Sagas.
As quoted by Jeremy Clarkson in Top Gear : "What is the difference between Proton and another car company?"
Proton is a company created entirely to make money, where all the engineers and workers keep developing new ways to cut cost and safety features off their cars in order to keep the production cost down and ask poor Malaysians to pay more.
“Aiya scare what? Proton is protekted by gaberment because it was the Government-Link-Company kan? If Proton bankrupt then the gahpamen will shame dan the only Malaysia's pride is gone lah!”
“If the country is trying very hard to produce something which would stand to benefit us in return why are we making so much fuss out of it. Just see the new proton. isn't THIS AN IMPROVEMENT? Come on lah jangan duk caci sana sini”
After that the second model was the Proton Wira which was introduced in 1993. It was sold like blue VCDs in a night market. The Malaysians actually thought that this car was THE SHIT unlike the Proton Saga, but it turned out that the car was more expensive and of even poorer quality. Proton realised what Malaysian consumers need, a poor quality car proven to be more popular. Proton Wira gave its buyers a lingering headache (more of a butt ache because the car would hit every hump on the road) which made them always think about and remember the car company that ripped them off. (I will remember you... I will never forget those damn bastards at Proton who made these shitty cars that disgrace Malaysia!!!).
Proton's Power[edit | edit source]
All Proton car owners will proudly tell you their car's air-condition system is the coldest unlike any other(well only just for a while~). Their car quality must be the
worst special among any car around the world to gain more popularity. Protons have unique assembly loops exposed between parts to gain more fresh air into your car, cheap and fragile plastic components to ensure that the owners always replace new parts to service their car, no anti-rust coat on body the iron oxide makes the car look even more beautiful (optional), special noise effects over the car which causes the car engines to beat the audio system's noise to it, problematic engine and gearbox system, giving the car more power and performance, funny electronic systems where the ECU(Electronic Control Unit) in the car will make the driver always in a happy mood even when they are crying, super hard and noisy suspension system giving their car the best suspension setting and an inaccurate speedometer, which gives drivers the feeling they are driving very fast and furious.
The Proud Owner of Lotus[edit | edit source]
Mahathir Mohamad bought Lotus, a British Sport Car manufacturer to Proton by using the Malaysians' tax money. Then Proton spread word to people that all their cars are engineered using Lotus technology, and this will mean that their future designs will have great handling like a Porsche, power like a Lamborghini, speed like a Ferrari, pussy magnet power like a McLaren.
Not only that, even the steering, rims, bumper, seat, dashboard, carpet, outlook, headlight, exhaust, everything and anything is designed or engineered by Lotus (and so they say). Proton cars will be even been re-badged as Lotus-Proton in some part of the world to gain a better image.(Lotus mah...)
Well OF COURSE the new cars have a Lotus feel in them. Just like the previous ones have a Mitsubishi feel in them. Which means the cars feel like being built by a dozen fat blokes in a shed in Essex rather than in a (claimed) sophisticated-robotized factory.But hey, Malaysia Boleh kan? If they could do it in the past, they could do it again!
“Hoi...Don't Play-Play!!! My car is engineered by LOTUS!!! You want challenge me???”
“ Wah, you know something, ah?! My proton car so strong like a tank!!!”
“ I'll gladly trade the Lotus-developed suspension with the Toyota-developed doortrims.”
Proton in The World[edit | edit source]
Proton feels that they are very important in the world's automotive industry due to their over-proud Malaysia Boleh spirit. The truth is 94% of Proton cars are sold inside Malaysia. Every year Proton 'successfully' sells around 150000 units of their car(except in 2006 when they were only able to sell 110,000 units). Compared to Russian, Chinese or Indian car manufacturers such as GAZ, Lada, Daihatsu, Daewoo, Doyoda, Tata, Subroo, Maruti, Chery, Yahama, Hongda, Geely, Great Wall, Hafei or whatever, the number of Proton sales of 150,000 units is just a big joke.
For exported cars, Proton will only use 'Grade A' parts with better assembly methods, as well as other customer services such as ridiculously long warranty periods and a high bunch of free gifts upon purchase. They make sure that the car quality is much superior than the cars for the domestic markets. But even with those extra buffs, Proton cars didn't really make it outside Malaysia anyway.
“Make sure that our exported cars are well built because the Britons are very fussy. Or else, the car will be rejected and sent back to Malaysia. Car for Malaysia market? Tak apa lah, no need quality control since poor quality will make sure they always replace and service their car. More profit for us. ”
Proton is currently trying to improve its range and regain its market share especially in Malaysia. Good luck to Proton on this front. While some feeble attempts have been made to introduce 'new' models, one just can't help noticing the now 22-year old Proton Sagas is still in production and remains one of Proton's 'Best Seller' (because it is the cheapest of the shitty cars).
Proton is an assembler of very cheap and very nasty cars in Malaysia. Malaysians have suffered greatly from this corporation hell bent on making money rather than having a passion to build good cars that the country can actually take pride in. The quality is terrible, a fact well known among Malaysians and abroad. Just sit in any Malaysian taxi to experience Proton first-hand. You will regret it. Even the local Malaysian trishaws produce less vibration and noise than a Proton car. They last a lot longer before breaking down too, BTW.
Another benchmark of Proton success is they successfully penetrated into the American automotive market defeating other giant car maker such as Ford, GM, Ferrari and even Toyota to be sold in to Amish Community. It is the only known vehicle in the world that ever passed the strict regulation of Amish Transportation guide with flying colours results as other car maker failed miserably. One of the most important guidelines known is "Ye shall not have evil technology in Ye Donkey coach". At first the marketing strategy is to give out free horse for every proton purchased but latter phased out and replaced by "free one proton with one horse purchase" and "for one donkey purchased get 2 proton for free"
Proton recently tried to penetrate the Indonesian market, which is a stupid move really, considering the relationship between the two countries. It's actually like selling Israel-made goods in Palestine, really, only worse. Of course, despite years of expensive-priced crap cars, Indonesians are quick to point out that Protons are rubbish and they rather work harder, save more money, and buy a better car, or not buy a car in first place. Not a bad move, since walking is actually cheaper than a Proton, and it's actually safer and more comfortable.
“What the fuck is this? It smells and looks worse than any other taxis in other third-world countries! I even used a Toyota Vios in Indonesia, a Toyota Corolla in Thailand and a Toyota Innova in the Philippines! Low standard cheap vehicraps! That is more fucking horrible than communist China or Russia! If I were a Malaysian, I'd rather my country don't produce any national cars(rebadged japanese left-overs) than any of these. Jeez! ”
They also claim that they have received a lot of bookings in China and Tomyamland, average 11 car in China and 200 car sold in Tomyamland per month. Nobody would be stupid enough to buy a Proton which will cost more than a Volkswagen or Toyota in those two countries where good cars are really cheap.
Proton Car Models[edit | edit source]
Still In Production[edit | edit source]
- Potong Sucka (since 1985)
This coffin looking shit box was introduced in 1985 since the birth of Proton. The Proton Saga had been given more facelifts than Michael Jackson; again and again in 1991, 1993, 2003, 2006, 2010, 2020 for more (supposedly) chicks-inducing looks. In 1993 the Saga was rebadged as Saga Iswara (Is-shit). In 1998 the Saga Iswara became modern AGAIN by receiving a new more sporty (Proton owns Lotus, so all cars in its line-up has to look "sporty", see?) steering than its original squarish look.
In 2003, a sports version of Saga Iswara powered by a miserable 550kw pushrod, Milo-tin cylinder 8000cc V12 disposable, intercooled engine with Nissan Skyline taillights and Subaru Impreza WRX exhaust system hit the market. It was designed to be sent to junkyards after one drag race, much like a disposable camera. Sometime in 2004, the Saga Iswara was facelifted again and renamed as Saga LMST (Like My ShiT, or alternaively, Lame Miserable Slow Turd). This new version featured enlarged tits both front and rear. It also had an Audi TT-inspired dashboard, Civic Type R bucket-seat and 1st generation Lotus Elise-derived dashboard display. As you can see, Proton try very hard to be sporty, just like Lotus.
In 2006, the Saga was facelifted yet AGAIN!!!! to include a new Wau profiled grille to match the rest of the family. In 2007 Proton is selling Saga at RM26,999 (around 7000USD to celebrate poor sales of Proton cars in 2006. Proton is trying to lure more innocent Malaysians into buying this piece of shit box with the slogan "Thank you Malaysian over 22 years for the support of Proton". Insiders said that the actual message is "Thank you Malaysian, over 22 years you have been stupid enough to let us rip your ass off"
It is believed that Proton will continue selling the Proton Saga till the end of time as they claim that this Saga is a icon car of Malaysia just like the Rover's (now BMW) Mini, old Volkswagen Beetle or Land Rover Defender.
- Proton Gila (since 1993)
A rebadged 1991 Mitsubishi Lancer, production still continues until today as this car still outsells the Gen2 which should be the Wira Replacement Model. Proton Wira is believe to have been given facelifts for more than 5 times in its current lifespan. Wira is the most wanted vehicle by every Ah Beng and Ah Long as it is fierce looking and is easily converted into a Lancer Evolution VIII just by a muffler swap.
A sport version of Wira know as WiSE or Wira Sohai Edition were introduce in 2003 with Mugen-look ricer's-standard-issue spoiler, GT-Wing from Nissan Silvia and Subaru Impreza WRX exhaust system powered by 150cc 1 cylinder engine. The car is capable of smoking Evolution 9s, Ferrari F360s or Mazda RX8s on the Federal Highway during peak hours.
- Proton Suckria
It actually a rebadge from the 1991 Mitsubishi Mirage/Colt. A much slower model, GTi was introduced in 1998. Proton claimed it was engineered and the handling done by LOTUS, which is stupid because, again, it's a Mitsubishi left-over. The GTi version did not last long because Ah Beng out there can do a better job than Proton by fitting a more powerful Mitsubishi engine. There is also an R3 limited edition of Satria which Proton claims was 0.1 second faster than the normal version.
The new Sucktria Neonzzz replaced the old Sucktria, with even more underpowered maCAMPRO engine. CAMPRO is the short for CAMe with PROblems which truly shows the quality of Satria Neonzz. Shortly after the release of Satria Neonzz, Potong came out with another faster more expensive version of Neonzz called the Satria Neonzzz CPS (Cincai-Pasang-Sahaja) which in plain English means VTEC.
- Proton Banana (since 1995)
This is the most exclusive car made by Proton; again it was rebadge from the 1990 Nissan Skyline R32 GTR but with more doors. The engine is powered by 6 bananas which is also engineered by LOTUS.
This car claims to have the same standard as BMW 7 Series, Mercedes Benz S-Class or Lexus LS460. So once upon a time Mahathir MohaMAD asked all the government ministers to use the Banana as their official vehicle, but it failed as he switched back to a Mercedes S-Class to his office because he can't afford having a car whose engine might blow up when being chased by terrorists. Besides that the cost of maintaining & supplying that stupid car by their sole/official govt car mechanics Spanco is as much as maintaining a Merc E CLass and the stupid V6 gearbox cost RM 24k each!! More expensive that any luxury German cars. Actually, the car is a rebadged Mitshitbushit Galant, but not the current one, or even the one before the current one. Originally a quite decent car, Proton managed to ruin this car with a body panel so thin you can see through it, an engine with less power than the Swiss Army, and to top it off, a big-sized-taxi image for what supposed to be a flagship car. Well done!
- Proton Wajunk! (since 2000)
Wajunk is Asian BMW. Why buy BMW when you can have the Wajunk? Proton tells the whole world that Wajunk is their first own built, design and engineered vehicle. However the secret was outed when the straight-faced Nazis from BMW strip-search the Wajunk and found that Wajunk is (again) built on Mitsubishi Carisma's floorplan. And look at that headlamps! VW Jetta anyone?
In UK, Wajunk is renamed to Proton Impian to prevent the British from pronouncing it as "Wah JUNK!". A few years later, Proton came out with another longer version of Wajunk known as "Proton Chancellor" Rumours had it that it was as luxurious as a Mercedes Benz S-Class, Royce Rolls Phantom or even a Maybach but no one knows, partly because no one has ever sat in this car because it was more expensive than the most expensive car in this world, and partly because it's all bullshit and due to the fact that in Europe it only got
five one star for pedestrian safety, which shows just how greedy Proton is since they never care about safety but only about making more money.
In 2007 the Waja was finally given a facelift and fitted with the
miserable unreliable maCamPro engine to replace the ye'olde but more reliable Mitsubishi 4G18. The new WaJunk Campro is design to look more like a VW Jetta/Bora to show the possibity of Proton, being a typical Malaysian, claiming that the brand "Volkswagen" are actually theirs.
ricer fan clubs were formed by Waja owners such as WPC (World-Wide Pokemon Club or WAN PAN CHAT). These hardcore say their Wajas are capable of smoking a Nissan 350Z on traffic light sprint, Mercedes C200K on a top speed run and were more comfortable than BMW 745Li. More adventurous members even spend as much as RM70,000 modernizing their Waja (more than the car worth) for performance parts and claimed to have smoked a Mazda RX7 or a Porsche Cayman at Sepong Sepang circuit. A top speed is 350km/h is claimed, thanks to the ever so inaccurate speedometer. nobody give a fucks anyway
- Proton Arena (since 2002)
This car was actually a failure from Proton R&D to clone the Toyota Hilux while develop a replacement coupe for Proton Putra. Wira front end joined with truck rear end, and you get an Arena! A typical Bolehland Multi Purpose potong car that can be sporty and bring 2 cow or 5 goat on it. It gives you the impression that you are in the Wild Wild West riding a bronco with its wonderful suspension. In reality, what you're doing is delivering refrigerators and smoking those rubbers like all ricers on every red light. You want SPORTY and MORE POWER? Optional GT-Wing is available and guaranteed to add 1000 raging horn power. Bugatti Veyron? Piece of cake!!
- Proton Junk2 (since 2003)
Gen2 or known as the Junk2 means Proton will start making 2nd generation junk engineered by monkeys built in jungle clearings by people who failed their primary 6 mathematics. Duit Kopi inspired Proton management to buy all the low quality parts from Babiputra company to build the Junk2. Junk2 is powered by an ex-renault engine. Actually, the engine was a part of a trial and error research conducted by renault (it was the error though). Rather than pay someone to crush the engine, renault sold the design to a bunch of imbecile called Proton Engineers.
This car was meant as a "WRX (Wira Replacement Xtreme)" but unfortunately, the older and prettier Proton Gila still has much higher sales figures than its replacement model, mainly due to the fact that the Junk2 is widely known as a highly unreliable machine, with frequent complaints of faulty power windows, gearbox failure, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, unable to open door, cheap plastic interior, faulty ECU, mechanical problem, leaking roof, faulty power windows, gearbox failure, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, cheap plastic interior, faulty ECU, gearbox failure, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, unable to open door, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, unable to open door, cheap plastic interior, faulty ECU, mechanical problem, leaking roof, faulty power windows, gearbox failure, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, unable to open door,cheap plastic interior, faulty ECU, mechanical problem, leaking roof, faulty power windows, gearbox failure, mechanical problem, leaking roof, paint defect, unable to open door, cheap plastic interior and various other trademark Proton defects. (repeat)
The tag of Proton own built engine is called
maCamRy or Cam Ry. However, Toyota sue Proton because it resembled the name of one of it's cars, so Proton crossed the "Ry" and put "Pro" instead maCampro. Not as claimed by Proton people and the not so accurate and reliable wikipedia.
- Proton Sawi (since 2005)
Proton Savvy a.k.a Sawi is a kind of vegetable launch in 2005 as the replacement model for the well known low quality and suicidal depreciating "Proton Tiara". The car is fitted with engine and gearbox sourced from Peanut. Launched with tag line
"My first time being ripped off" "My first mistake" "My first heap of junk" "My First Lotus" whereit had good handling close to a supercar. This model is as of the same range and almost same sound of name as the BerokTua Mawi, a car from Malaysia's second national car project, Perodua.
Proton was supposed to fit Sawi with the not so successful CamPro 1.3 engine inside but they noticed the fucked-up CamPro engine was too expensive and too big to fit inside this car which was specifically targeted at the low budget car market, although RM450million had been used to develop the low budget
Sawi is claimed to be super tough and built like a nano-tech-strength-enhanced-super-tank that can withstand an indirect nuclear blast from a Japan's Fukushima Nuclear Meltdown. Proton advertised that Sawi is too tough to be destroyed so it doesn't need any airbags inside. However, real life testing confirms that it's chassis is just as tough as a creme brulee.
- Proton Persona (New 2007 model)
Persona is a new Protong car Potong from the old Protong Junk2. Proton have not enough money for their R&D to design and built another new junk due to the internal corruption. They come out with an idea, rename, recycle and refurbish the Junk2 which full of quality problem as another new car. What they need is just cut or Potong the ass of Junk2 and joint it with extra 28cm of metal to make it longer larger and spacious and claimed it as a new car. This is believed to be the first Protong car ever that was Potong from Proton!!!
- Proton Sucka BLM
Before the car is announced, it has many alias such as Buruk Lagi Murah(Crap is cheaper), Banyak Lagi Masalah(Still more problem), Boleh Lepas Mawi(Can over Mawi), Belum Lagi Maju (Not improve yet), Bagi Lu Malu(Make you ashame), and Babi Lembu Malaisial(Pig & cow of Malaisial), Boleh Letak Mivec(Mistubishi Mivec Transplant).
This is the dark resurrection model of the old Sucka since the old Sucka began to rest in peace after 22 year of service(still on sale to clear the old stock).
This is the main model to give Plotong a chance to beat the ProTua Mawi and Siva in terms of size and price. It has bigger chassis, bigger interior, bigger engine, bigger front & rear lamp and bigger doors than the much more expensive Mawi. It also has the power to drive over Mawi with its refined 'Can-not-Pro' engine (which is actually moved from old Junk2 1.3 liter engine).
Some said it has the front look of Audi TT, rear look of Mercedes , and side look of Toyota Vios(what a copy cat design, but again, Malaysia Boleh!!). In fact, it has none of these element found on the retail model, as for the pre-order, the brochure only show the greatest part of the car, not the whole car, and no test drive is provided as the car is sealed until the launching day.
The waiting list to get the car is extremely long with more than 6 month waiting period (very ridiculous, Plotong claims that there are too much orders until not enough time to make more ready stock), but you can paid RM100 in order to quit from queue immediately and straight away get a whole new Sucka, "A New Sucka Begin".
Frankly, the new Sucka is actually the "Cut and Paste" version of Protong Sawi (currently is recalled back to Plotong factory due to some issue) which been giving a mask plus cosmetic copy from Toyota Altezza. Same like the Persona model it also been Potong and added 35cm of steel recycle from old refrigerator making with an extra butt. All thanks to Protong genius solution of Cut and Paste technology from Microsoft Paint together with the help from Lotus. This budget solution is only cost RM110million ringgit sponsor by the Barisan National.
As time goes, the Saga BLM design is consider outdated as it was copy from model that had discontinued. Proton keep the spirit of tradition by facelift the outlook of Saga BLM becoming Saga FL. Now the new Saga been modernization again yet look like the latest Subaru Impreza WRX kahwined with Renault Megane.
- Proton Exora
An apparently revolutionary self made MPV. As only RM450million instead of RM1billion were spend to develop the MPV. However, it has been very successful to date as many people of the Proton Extremists Society sexually exercise with their wives everyday and they never heard of condoms hence they have lots of kids. The name of this car is based on the Lotus Evora but that is where the relation of sport begin. It is world renowned for sporty handling making it the world best handling and rides MPV.
- Proton Inspira
Overshadow and jealous of how success Perodua re-badged ToyolDuck Basuh and Ah Boon. Proton came out an inspriration of re-badging back Mitsubishi Lancer again for the celebration of 25 years Proton being survive. The car is a result of partnershit between Mitsubishi after Proton send their top Chairman and Director for a vacation trip to Japan. They call it a collaboration rather than a rebadge(LOL) which only take up RM250million to develop a better version of Lancer. The new car with a tagline of Smart Guys Get It
Dumb ass bought Lancer offer in MiVEC engine and F1 style paddle shift, where Proton trademark of own quality product and unique installation were feature.
According to Proton the top spec version of 2.0 CVT will sold at RM95,000.00 in Peninsular, at the same time a new Mitsubishi Lancer GT (CBU) in Langkawi dutyfree island only sold for RM70,000.00. The extra cost of RM25,000.00 is due to special accessories such as better bumper design, more bling-bling chrome, Lotus Handling, cronies stomach, Dr.M salaries and 1Malaysia Lotus Racing teams. Where it's consider best value for Rakyat money for Proton.
- Proton Pariah
Pariah was launched in early 2012 as Malaysia first global car. Pariah was proven to have 10 stars ANCAP safety rating, it's driver confirm can survives in head on collision with German tank. The Pariah's 8-liter V12 CFE engine which develop by Pratt & Whitney sounds like lots of small things exploding. At max output 900kW (1600Nm), it can achives 0-320km/h in just mere 9.9 secs. It was rumors that a white Pariah smoked a Bugatti Veyron at MEX Highway somewhere early of June this year, but spokesperson from Proton was unable to reach to further comment and verify.
Out of Production[edit | edit source]
- Proton Tiada
The most suicidal most ass depreciating car on earth. Tiara is rebadge from the 1986 Citroen AX. With the lack of availability of parts and overpriced parts from Proton plus their cool management, in 3 years time the Tiara will only cost around RM2k from its original price of RM35k. Add a couple of years more and it will go to the value of 50 cents. - how do you double its value? Just fill it's radiator with water.
- Proton Putra
Proton own sports car is a rebadge(Ahhh again~) from the Mitsubishi Mirage Asti. Production was stopped as Proton claimed that too many owners of Putrid had rebadged their vehicles back to the Mitsubishi Mirage and that it was not selling as well as other Proton makes. To save factory space and assembly line for other vehicles, Proton introduced Proton Arena to replace the Putra.
- Proton Juara
The most obvious failed vehicle make by Proton with a stupid name Juara which means Champion in English. This car is claimed by many to be a coffin car, esp when it is black in color. Malaysians were not attracted to this unsporty vehicle which looks more like giant assorted biscuit tins (which is a very accurate hunch, since they were is in fact giant assorted biscuit tins from Giant supermarkets with holes cut out and wheels attached). Production of this car ended after less than a Proton, and this car will be the last Mitsubishi rebadge by Proton. Maybe not..
Rumor/Concept/Prototype Car[edit | edit source]
Proton is also well known for spreading rumors, hoaxes, bias and bullshit about their upcoming car which handle better than Porsche 911 & faster than Nissan Skyline GTR 35 in Autobahn. Proton once have asked Kleemann to supply a Supercharger for their Satria Neo in 2005 but there is no official update until today. Later, they asked ATOM to help develop a more powerful Campro engine to them. Proton announced a partnership with VW without the agreement from VW. They have even decided the name for the partnership,Voltron. Pathetic, but again, Malaysia Boleh!!
- Proton MPX
A rebadged version of Lotus APX concept car which debut in 2005 Geneva Motor Show.
- Proton Gen2 EVE Hybrid Concept
A concept car of take a Gen2 body and fix with golf caddy engine and battery. The car had been drive by Pak Lah during the 50 years of independence in 2007 at the hike of fuel price.
- Proton PM5
A concept sport car based on 1:8 scale diecast model. No engine and technology details were given.
- Islamic Car a.k.a Muslim Car
Somehow the brain of Proton CEO were just too smart came out with this idea. Aim for Islamic country's market
and some kamikaze, the car could boast special features like a compass pointing to Mecca and a dedicated space to keep a copy of the Koran and a headscarf.  Other source said the car will automatically stop whenever the time of prayer is begin regardless where you are as it is believe God will protect the car from any accidents.
- Proton EMAS
For the sake of Malaysia Boleh, Proton and Dictator M make debut to the world in the 2010 Geneva Motor Show in a
Tata Nano Proton EMAS concept car. The concept car is design, built and develop by Italdesign Giugiaro which hire by Proton. On paper it looks promising because it is a concept car that won't be built after all with a hybrid engine and is expected to be in production by 2012.
The Pahlawan Concept[edit | edit source]
To show off how creative and hardworking the Proton group. Proton had bring 5
copied concept car into 2010 KLIMS (Kampung Lanun Inter-kampung Kuala Lumpur International Motor Show) in the hope too boost their car sales and government financial and physical support. Of course all the 5 what so Proton call concept car is just an ecstasy to their diehard Proton supporter.
- Proton Kasturi - Saga FL with some strip of R3 sticker line
- Proton Jebat - rebadged of Mitsubishi Evolution X
- Proton Lekir - rebadged of Lotus Europa
- Proton Lekiu - mold concept of SUV based on Proton Exora that without interior
- Proton Tuah - mold concept of Sedan based on Youngman L5 that without interior
Proton Motorsporting Division (R3)[edit | edit source]
Proton's Motorsporting Division or better known as R3 (Rubbish, Ruined, Refurbished) is a sub division of Proton specializing in tinting, sticker and pimpify-ing Proton cars. The models pimped by R3 included:
- Suckria R3 - 1.6 Inline-1 NOHC (No Overhead Cam) engine.
- R2D2 Junk.2 R3 - 1.6 Inline-1 TMOHC (Too Much Overhead Cam)
- Sawi R3 - Vista Premium specs. Able to upgrade to Vista Ultimate.
- Wajunk R3 - available in both 1.6 and 1.8 404OHCNF (404 Overhead Cam Not Found)
- Wira "SE" (R3 Shit Edition) - addition of bigger GT-wing giving extra 40bhp (Beng-Hilarious-Power)
R3 headquarter is located within a stone throw away from the infamous Tanjung Rambutan Mental Hospital. Their product includes super dark tints, racing stripes, in-car dildos, vibrators and vaseline-based engine oil.
According to R3 spokesperson, R3P0, they're currently researching on racing stripes that is able to add at least 50hp on the wheel per-inch. This innovative breakthrough is currently still under R&D testing at their Tanjung Rambutan testing facility. It would be made available to Proton enthusiast by the end of 2020.
“We are superior compared to M-Technik, Alpina, AC Schnitzer, Nismo, Sti, AMG, Brabus, Pantiebus etc etc. don play play ...rawr!!!”
Buy Proton if you're Patriotic[edit | edit source]
Thanks to Proton's "unreliable" car history, in 2006 they suffered a massive drop in sales. Their dealers all ate buns, their share price dropped like a meteor, their managers asked for higher pay and bonus(aiya the hike in oil price), their salesman had nothing to do and became part time Mat Rempit, their female workers forced to work as GRO. Proton blamed their woes on other car companies for selling advanced, up to date, reliable and better quality cars. Tengku Mahaleel dust bin Brainless cried that he government wasn't protecting them(that's what all Malays do), even when the government sent Malaysia into another economic crisis by draining all the country's money into saving Bolehcar.
It was reported that over 10,000 Proton new cars were still stuck in the Proton factory due to their
excellent quality. To promote Proton cars, the government ministers told all Malaysians to buy Proton cars if they love their own country. Buy a foreign car or Perodua if you're a retard! (yeah right, and when did the last time you see a government official in a sodding Proton?) Proton desperately tried to boost sales by offering incentives such as free window tints, free GT-Wings, free sex with the salesman's daughter, free Japanese Porn, and to top it all off, zero down payment and zero to pay until the end of time. If all these freebies still don't work (especially the sex part), then cars of all makes over 5 years old shall be banned from the roads unless it is a Proton.
“Company no profit is never mind lah, but promise i got salary la.., and also higher bonus for this year lah please. Tolong lah we are so patriotic and proud to work with Proton!”
“Jika anda tidak beli proton, anda tidak cinta akan negara. (If you don't buy a Goddamn Proton than you hate your own country
and you shall be hung in front of public.”
The Automotive Globalization[edit | edit source]
Proton realised they needed to co-operate with some big car manufacturing company to survive. Having LOTUS alone is not enough. In 2007, Proton started to lick Volkswagen's balls, hoping for a partnership. But actually VW were more interested to buy the entire Proton company. The partnership failed due to the Never Ending Policy of Bolehland which does not allow Prorot to be bought and owned by a foreign entity like Volkswagen.
Lately they started to negotiate with Peugeot but still failed due to the same unknown reason. Then they started a rumour saying that General Motors was interested in a partnership with them but later General Motors claimed it was bullshit. On a second try, Proton was back in talks with Volkswagen again but still failed. Proton sent out representatives which is the Malaysian Prime Minister Datuk Seri Amat AduhLah Bodohwi to lick the anus of VW's CEO. It still failed however.
On May 31st 2007, the Pak Lembik@Pak Lah@Pak Tidur dalam meeting proudly announced that Proton doesn't need Volkswagen and the deal is over. (We all know that VW don't give a shit about Proton). On 1st June 2007, Proton reported a loss of over RM600 million. All Malaysians are anticipating for Proton announce bankruptcy but as we know this won't happen because government will keep on pouring Malaysian tax payer's money to save Proton.
Again on June 2007 they spread their second rumor that Volkswagen AG already bought them but later Volkswagen say it was hoax and scam from Proton. WTF is wrong with them?!?!?
As of November Pak Lembik@Pak Lah@Pak Tidur announced that "hey look, we don't actually need to lick Volkswagen's balls in order to make better quality cars. We could actually look for partners from India or Cambodia or some factory in Ghana".
A good thing about this idea is because we will safe our face and "We - Malaysians with our Boleh spirit" will not kowtao to any lame American/English/European Faggots and need to follow their rules in producing quality cars. We will continue to use our own faggoty rule and continue producing low quality cars with or without any partners even if we have to squeeze every damn penny from the citizen.
“You die your problem, you get permanent disability your problem, you pay $70,000 to buy our low quality car your problem, If you don't buy our sucky car is our problem because we need this money to support our high class lifestyle, it doesn't matter if you be eating Maggi Mee every day for the rest of your day as long as we are eating caviar and driving a personal jet on autopilot while humping Models.”
~ The Proton management people
Protect me more please[edit | edit source]
From its launch, Proton has been given a high tax and duty exemption from the Government compared to other imported makes. The price differential is enormous.
After the birth of Proton, Japanese/European cars were taxed up to 200% of their actual prices. Poor Malaysians are FORCED to buy buy Proton cars because of the high import taxes of foreign makes. With an average income of around RM1,600 per person, they could afford no better, while some Datuk or Tan Sri could ride around in their BMWs flushed with money from their Ali Baba businesses.
Mengenai kerugian itu, antara lain ia disebabkan jumlah jualan kereta yang kurang kualiti dan juga faktor kebencian pembeli-pembeli kereta kepada Proton yang sering ditunjukkan di dalam siri Top Gear.
The above statement was spoken by one Malaysian minister. Translated it means "As for the losses in Proton, the reasons are low quality and also the reasons of dislike that buyers had for Proton (cars) that was shown in the Top Gear series."
Once again,true to bolehland standards,blaming others is the way to solve their own problems.
Their biggest enemy after Pedoduck[edit | edit source]
Proton feels a real threat from the appearance of China cars because after a 50% tax & duty, those Chinese cars are still cheaper than Proton cars. So the government imposed a 100% tax & duty on Chinese cars from their original price and made them more expensive than Proton cars.
A few china car manufacturers were interested in building a factory to assemble their own cars to get lower tax for their cars in the local market. However suddenly the government changed the National Automotive Policy (NAP) to force them to comply with a 2:8 local distribution to export ratio. And this is only approved for the assembly of cars with 1.6 liters of displacement and above.
This had resulted in 1 of the Chinese car makers being forced to give Proton to assemble their car while another China car maker changed their original plan to built a assembly factory in Malaysia and shifted to Indonesia.
==Pauline Tan, the Loyal Moronic Supporters of Proton==
Potong pays RM3 per article for Pauline Tan just to say good things about Potong in his Proton-fanboy Automotive Blog. Pauline Tan has his cronies, accordmania, the three gay paedophiles kjryth, osh_kosh and My Ah Boy who play little napoleons in their pussy "Ploton So Totally Rules" Forum. They will do anything just to protect the Potong namesake and won't admit that Potong is making craps. Any people who disagree with them will be bombarded with lame jokes, poor english, rude words and raped or sodomy by the three gay paedophiles kjryth, osh_kosh and My Ah Boy. It will only be time before they come here and rewrite this whole Proton subject into praising about Potong.
accordmania drives a shit car like the potong sawi because he can afford REAL CARS, so he hate people in BMWs and always say that the heap-of-misery he drives is still better than BMW or Porsche. kjryth can't afford an Audi so he always bombards people who can afford 1. osh_kosh owns a Ploton version of Audi - the Wajunk but hide the Ploton badge to show how patriotic he is to the national car program, he even changed the engine from his Camproke engine into a Saga 1.3 carburetor engine that has the word "LOTUS" written on it. They are very much like AP Empress Rafidah, always very bold in fighting people, but due to the lack of command of english(what to do, ketuanan melayu ma, bumiputra rox), they always lose and cry, so that they can be forgiven. They always think that they are hell lot of matured, because they simply can't keep up with he english proficiency of others. They will then go crying to Paultan " Paultan , paultan, that guy bully me!" "PAULINE TAN will then go ban the other users and then those three stooges will be very happy talking to themselves in their proton world. they have their mini-me potong so totally rulez forum"
The sight of a proton waja causes them to suddenly stand on the road and masturbate. Currently these fans gave themselves a name called "plotongnians" where they set up 200 accounts a person on the Paultan website so that they can post a lot of comments on the Paultan website and praise how good that rubbish bitch son of an MPV the "plotong exora" is eventhough it is really rubbish.
Asshole PaulineTan is more of a spoilt brat blogger than a "motoring journalist" this asshole claims to be. PaulineTan is superbiased against established car companies like Perodua, Toyota, Nissan, Mercedes-Benz, etc since they do not treat him seriously since he is just an idiot blogger. PaulineTan, through his subtlely biased shite blog-posts, influences the moronic readers of the shite paultan.org blogsite to hate these brands by writing biased "reviews". PaulineTan is a shithead fan of Plotong(they pay him money mah), Hongdah (guess who sponsored his trip to 2009 Tokyo Motorshow) and BMW (arrogant people like PaulineTan own crap Beemers). He also likes these three shitty brands since the stupid companies advertise on his shitty blog. Of course biased mah! You call yourself a "motoring journalist" you arrogant, biased PaulineTan?
Supporters of PaulineTan are all uneducated kampung folk who believe whatever this asshole writes and should be treated like Mat Rempit scum. These asswipes then go and harass any smarter people who see the flaws of PaulineTan and his superbiasness of Plotong, Hongdah and BMW. Easiest way to avoid the exposure to extreme stupidity is to block paultan.org from your internet browser.
Just lately, the news of Proton going to Geneva have prompted the Proton Ultras but not really power Club to loudly proclaim that proton is a great car and is strong enough to be shown alongside the likes of Lembukini and Ferrrlari. Little do they know their exhibit is quite far away from the Geneva convention centre, somewhere near Ulu Klang in fact.
People on Proton[edit | edit source]
“Hey isn't that dangerous? Taking spyshots of Proton cars with the mobile phone and posting it up on Paul Tan's website? I mean that's literally using mobile phone while driving. ”
~ Captain Obvious on Paul Tan posting up spyshots of Proton cars by readers.
“WHAT THE FUCK?! Need to replace the fucking gearbox again? Fuck man! This is the fucking... shit I fucking lost count how many times I've replaced the fucking gearbox for my Proton Chancellor ”
~ Tun Mahathir whining about his Proton car gearbox to Proton's service advisor
“WHAT THE FUCK?! Need to replace the fucking gearbox again? Fuck man! I just stopped driving this car (Proton Chancellor) already and just leave it at home. Why still need to change gearbox? What the fuck, right? ”
~ Tun Mahathir still whining about his Proton car gearbox to Proton's service advisor
“Fuck it lah. If they're involved in an accident and die then that's their problem lah. They die because they are weak. I don't give a shit and we won't, I repeat, we won't put airbag in our cars. ”
~ Proton CEO before he decide to include airbag in all Proton cars.
“Mana ada bocor? Proton Perdana saya pun bocor tiap-tiap bulan!”
~ Bung Moktar Radin from Kinabatangan comment about his Proton Perdana
“Why would i buy a Proton when i could buy a real car. Like a KIA.”
~ "Enlightened" kid
“Kereta ini kereta Malaysia, you tak suka, you keluar dari Malaysia! ”
~ Badruddin Amiruldin, on people who modified a Proton back to Mitsubishi
“I don't think Proton car is rubbish, as a matter in fact, our Ploton car is even better than Frawd, Shitvrolet, Mar-Sir-Lee BENG, Toyoduck, Mitubishit, Fucklari or Lembukini !!!"”
~ Proton CEO
“"What the hell !!! Are you stupid ???!!! Why should we produce high quality cars? Malaysian still will buy our car one, even though our great Proton cars are no quality (not low quality) because our car is the cheapest in Malaysia. We just need to produce low quality cars for Malaysian is enough lah, why waste money on doing QC and R&D?" ”
~ Proton CEO roared fiercely to the Proton Engineer who wish to improve the cars' quality
“"The government is scouring all avenues to bring about Proton's financial recovery and enable its products to be globally competitive. ”
~ Datuk Seri Dr Hilmi Yahaya in his dream
“Do this have a pu$$y magnet? ”
~ Borat, looking for a car to travel all the way from KL to Sabah.
“You don't know cars, you shut up lah! ”
~ Proton CEO roared fiercely to Mitsubishi, Toyota, Nissan, Mercedes, BMW, Porsche during Shanghai International Car Exhibition
“If you have a crash in one of these, you would be seriously fatally killed...to death ”
~ Jeremy Clarkson, on the Proton Arena's NCAP crash test result, in which the car crumpled vertically.
“Malaysians must drive protons, each person must have at least 3 protons in their garage, only I can shove my fat ass around in a Porshces Gayenne ”
“Actually I only drive proton because Najis threatened to C4 me and my family if I don't. ”
~ A traumatized Malaysian citizen.
“Plotong has fucked my ass hard enough due to their faulty suspension, and I thought I have lost my virginity! ”
~ Some porn star
“OMG OMG OMG THIS CAR IS HOTTER THAN JESSICA ALBA ”
~ Proton Blind Fanboys on the new P3-21A concept
See also[edit | edit source]