|Another Oscar Wilde picture. From:
Chastity is a calling higher than marriage, and spiritually more profitable.
Oscar's Chosen Article
“I am speaking to you at what I know is an increasingly challenging time. It affects us all; Phillip and I are stuck in this 1000-room castle on a paltry 13 acre estate, with a skeleton staff of just 132.
"One thing that I would recommend to you all in this period is to make the most of the three wings of the fortress you don't use in a typical year. No good can come of having dinner in the same dining hall every night. So, try to find that swan-roasting banquet room your great-grandfather inaugurated in 1872!
"And if you feel your resolve or self-discipline begin to wane, I heartily recommend a retreat to your Imperial Billiards Room. If you are anything like me, you will get a real boost from the satisfaction that comes with using a mammoth-ivory cue to sink a tarsian's eye-ball into a tiger mouth-pocket. (Full article...)
You can suggest articles for Oscar to read.
Why was I born with such contemporaries?
The one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it.
It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information, so did you know...
From Uncyclopedia's playwrights:
This Month's Wit
Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
For Oscar-related chatter, see this room to talk about Oscar.