User talk:HELPME/Archive 4
Archive- January 15-February 14. HELPME crash lands on Uncyclopedia, some incidents and stuff, and is adopted by User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig2. He also wins a golden shower and gets into PEEING.
Archive 2- February 14-April 20. NOTM and all of its escapades, my disappearance, and Paizuri's gay retard fagginess.
Archive 3 - April 20-June 22. Mostly thankings and requests for voting, reviewing, and some other stuff and junk. Quite a bit of sexual talking here...
Rules
- Be as gay as possible, at all times.
- When I finally do archive this, do not just say "rape!!!1!!!" for the first message. Be creative. If you make the first message on my new page after this is archived anything to do with rape, I'll probably put it back in the archive. THIS JUST IN: I just requested UU extend his "rape" bans to my talk page, as well. We'll see how it goes.
- Unless you're really close to me and plan to be funny when doing it, DO NOT WHORE ON MY TALK PAGE!!! I'm an active
userRAPIST and I will see yourthingDICK without any help.
I've got a brand new combine harvester[edit source]
And I'll give you the key. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 09:07, June 22, 2010 (UTC)
- I've got a brand new pair of rollerskates.... -- Sir Mhaille
(talk to me)
- Twice in a row, Chief? You're probably making some people sad. Also, if I knew what the hell that meant I'd say thanks.-- On Tuesday, 09:08, June 22 2010 UTC
- Mhaille: I'll wager you won't harvest much with those. HELPME: BAHAHAHAHAHA! --ChiefjusticeXBox360 09:10, June 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Twice in a row, Chief? You're probably making some people sad. Also, if I knew what the hell that meant I'd say thanks.-- On Tuesday, 09:08, June 22 2010 UTC
♥♥♥ I love you. ♥♥♥[edit source]
The reason for this being that I get to use this new and shiny template to say hi!! Yes, this does indeed mean I lied to you -- you smell and no one loves you. Anyways, you look like you could use a buddy. We're all good friends around here, so here's some important stuff to help you out!
- Beginner's Guide - this has lots of really cool stuff in it. I think.
- Our Vanity Policies - why we don't care about your grandmother, your gay teachers, or your dog.
- How to Be Funny and Not Just Stupid - how to be loved, even though you smell bad, and occasionally experience the uncontrollable urge to dance to 80's music.
If for some reason you you still want to find out more, these will help a bunch!
- About Uncyclopedia and The Five Pliers of Uncyclopedia
- How to Get Started Editing on Uncyclopedia
- Help Pages
One more thing! When you do stuff, remember to sign your name using four tildes or just that weird looking sign (
) button at the top of the little edit box thingy.
Anyways, I've gotta go practice being a fairy princess. Love,
- Thanks for the welcome- I love you too! I wish I knew how to code...HELPME 09:13, Jun 22 2010 (UTC)HELPME
This[edit source]
|
John Lydon has been watching you and noticed you voted for Stalker to be Featured. Now he doesn't have to kill you. |
--—John Lydon 12:22, June 22, 2010 (UTC)
No amount of archiving will get rid of me[edit source]
>:< I'm very cross. Orian57 Talk 
16:57 22 June 2010
- What if I archived your penis?-- On Tuesday, 08:02, June 22 2010 UTC
- I think we'd both like that. Just so long as you put it in a folder first, maybe to folders so it can be archived safely. Orian57 Talk
23:36 22 June 2010
- I wouldn't like it. I don't think we should change your penis when it gets too long...-- On Tuesday, 11:49, June 22 2010 UTC
- I think we'd both like that. Just so long as you put it in a folder first, maybe to folders so it can be archived safely. Orian57 Talk
Viking![edit source]
I hate it when I miss out on the fresh archives. ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* 
(talk) (stalk) Π ~ 
~ 22 Jun 2010 ~ 23:51 (UTC)
- FUCK OFF! Orian57 Talk 23:52 22 June 2010
- Whoa! such angst. Remember,
- Kris Kross will make you
- Jump! Jump!
- Jump! Jump!
- The Mac Dad will make you
- Jump! Jump!
- Jump! Jump!
- The Daddy Mac will make you
- Jump! Jump!
- Jump! Jump!
- I'll make ya Jump! Jump!wiggle and shake your rump
- Cause I'll be kicking the flavor that makes you wanna Jump!
- How high? Real high
- CauseMac Daddy I'm just so fly
- uh huh uh huh
- Jump! Jump!
- Jump! Jump!
- Kris Kross will make you
- Jump! Jump!
- Some of them try to rhyme but they can't rhyme like this
- Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- Some of them try to rhyme but they can't rhyme like this
- Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- Some of them try to rhyme but they can't rhyme like this
- Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- Some of them try to rhyme but they can't
- Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- Cause I'm the miggida miggida miggida Mac Daddy
- Miggida miggida miggida Mac
- Cause I'm the miggida miggida miggida Mac Daddy, Daddy Mac
- I make you wanna
- Jump! Jump!
- Jump! Jump!
- Believe dat! ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~
~ 23 Jun 2010 ~ 00:08 (UTC)
Well oiled birds[edit source]
Thank you very much for your vote on Well-Oiled Birds. This is a special page to both Guildy and I, and lots of magic brought it forward. Thanks. Al 00:31 23 6 MMX
Noob in need of adoption[edit source]
i'm am way to old to be sitting here in the noob orphanage. I even come with my own puppy. Oh did I mention i'm paper trained. the puppy is not! ~ The* 
(say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:37, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- My puppy is, ha ha! About adoption, sure! Just put {{Adoptee|HELPME}} on your userpage. Then, you can ask me for help on a specific issue, or I can give you the full rundown, whichever you like.-- On Wednesday, 04:39, June 23 2010 UTC
- grrrrr that damn you have a message thing took me forever to realize it was part of the page every time i tried to look at your user page I ended up at paz's talk page ~ The*
(say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:50, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Ha ha. Nub. I love doing that to people!-- On Wednesday, 04:51, June 23 2010 UTC
- You are not right. I can respect that. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:53, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- The funny thing is, HELPME didn't even put that there. this guy did. —Pelozurian (talk) 04:54, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
- I really liked it. I was really getting pissed at the computer for a min there. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 05:00, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Actually Paizuri, I did put that there. He messed with it. I'm not sure why...-- On Wednesday, 05:02, June 23 2010 UTC
- This bug really got me too. i had to steal it, to see how it worked ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 05:20, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I taught that bug how to dance. Do I get ANY recognition for it? Nope. Jump! Jump!! ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~ ~ 24 Jun 2010 ~ 01:47 (UTC)
- I taught that bug how to dance. Do I get ANY recognition for it? Nope. Jump! Jump!! ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*
- This bug really got me too. i had to steal it, to see how it worked ~ The*
- Actually Paizuri, I did put that there. He messed with it. I'm not sure why...-- On Wednesday, 05:02, June 23 2010 UTC
- I really liked it. I was really getting pissed at the computer for a min there. ~ The*
- The funny thing is, HELPME didn't even put that there. this guy did. —Pelozurian (talk) 04:54, 23 June 2010 (UTC)
- You are not right. I can respect that. ~ The*
- Ha ha. Nub. I love doing that to people!-- On Wednesday, 04:51, June 23 2010 UTC
- grrrrr that damn you have a message thing took me forever to realize it was part of the page every time i tried to look at your user page I ended up at paz's talk page ~ The*
I know you wanted to vote for this. . .[edit source]
. . .but your dad or uncle or someone was looking over your shoulder and you were ashamed to vote yes. Surprise! Funnybony and I are psychic, and give templates to people who just think of any of our pages. Al timeless in the throes of tantra
This is fucked[edit source]
I have been trying to figure out this site. It does have many funny articles, and there is a lot of promise. On the other hand there is a lot of crap, unfortunately most of the crap seems to make it on the merits of this being a social networking site. lets promote user a's shit article because he's our friend. The sad part is if someone stumble's across the site they are greeted by an in-joke or sub-par article as a representation of a featured article( a sample of what this site has to offer). not that i feel i am better but then again i'm not trying for any so called Awards. besides is it really worth winning a beauty contest if all the the standards are so low? ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 21:59, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I'd like to think the site is far more complex than described although there is always the danger you have highlighted. -- Sir Mhaille (talk to me)
- Hey, don't worry too much. Number one, I know there's a lot of crap. That's what VFD, QVFD, and ICU are for. Number two, is this about Gramp's Insane Ramblings: Life Lessons on VFH? Some people probably do find it funny. Remember always that humor is subjective. There have been features I didn't like, but I just said "Damn, I wish that hadn't made it." and moved on. Sometimes, you don't like an article, but everyone else does. There are no people who vote based on who wrote something. If there are, they should be banned from VFH, or have probably already been warned over it. Whatever you do, just assume good faith as much as possible, or else you'll get drama, which will lead to bans, which will lead to complaining about bans, and a lot more trouble for admins then they have enough aspirin for. Hope this helps.-- On Wednesday, 10:07, June 23 2010 UTC
- Also, one more thing: Ignore how everyone else votes and vote how you feel. Even if it doesn't go your way, your voice was at least heard and considered. The majority may win always, but being the minority is not a bad thing.-- On Wednesday, 10:15, June 23 2010 UTC
- That's the strength and the curse of a wiki. It's open to everyone (look, HELPME got in!) and edited by anyone. Most people stop by as an IP, play around, then they find these massive complicated welcome templates on their talk page and get intimidated by such an anal approach to welcoming, and leave. Others stick around long enough to actually register with a name, and then they find people offering to blow them and to fuck them in the ass, and they leave. So the ones who stick around are usually pretty cool or crazy as fuck but with a touch of literacy. Then they write, and like HELPME stumbled on to, regular users have different tastes. Vastly different in some cases. But there are literally a couple thousand pages on this site which are very good, and hundreds which are exceptionally good. You just have to search and ask, and then appreciate some writers and scorn and spit on others. It all comes with thec territory, and makes for a great adult playground. Fun stuff. Aleister 22:19 23 6 MMX
- Bottom line - do I get to ban anyone? ~
22:21, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I wouldn't mind if you banned Paizuri.-- On Wednesday, 10:29, June 23 2010 UTC
- Its all good just aggravated with the whole grammar thing i guess. and was trying to figure out the merits of Opacity it was just copy paste. was working on proofing one of my how to's and came across it. also i saw a feature that had on sentence paragraphs. oh well just trying to figure out the audience I'm writing for. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 22:45, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I actually liked Opacity...Which article was that, by the way?-- On Wednesday, 10:46, June 23 2010 UTC
- I've never seen it! Thanks for pointing it out, nice code. And HELPME, you may have caused some drama over at the toasters. I'm popping the popcorn now, and maybe Mordillo may have found someone to ban. Ummmmm, olive oil, dill, nutritional yeast and a touch of ume plum vinegar on the popcorn. Aleister
- I was joking...-- On Wednesday, 10:50, June 23 2010 UTC
- What was the humor in opacity? ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 22:52, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- The page got less and less opaque. Also, it was just created today. Give the author some time.-- On Wednesday, 10:53, June 23 2010 UTC
- It was also created by a bureaucrat. If there was a cabal it would be ordering you all back down the mine at this very second for daring to discuss discussing the prospect of deleting the page. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 22:55, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Ah, a joke. That should be as fun as a non-joke lifetime ban. Popcorn ready and I've got my feet up waiting for the fireworks. Aleister 23:00 23 6 MMX
- Mordillo, you can also ban Aleister.-- On Wednesday, 11:01, June 23 2010 UTC
- I get the joke now it works. as for the cabal or bureaucrat part you have to realize i am a noob and don't get the significance of such terms. The page is amusing in lite of the "clearing up" of the matter. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 23:02, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Check out Cabal and the pages that are linked in that series for some information on the joke. It's an in-joke. Bureaucrats are admins that have the power to change user rights. Try Wikipedia:Wikipedia:Bureaucrats for more. Mordillo and Mhaille are the active bureaucrats..-- On Wednesday, 11:11, June 23 2010 UTC
- Ah, a joke. That should be as fun as a non-joke lifetime ban. Popcorn ready and I've got my feet up waiting for the fireworks. Aleister 23:00 23 6 MMX
- It was also created by a bureaucrat. If there was a cabal it would be ordering you all back down the mine at this very second for daring to discuss discussing the prospect of deleting the page. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 22:55, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- The page got less and less opaque. Also, it was just created today. Give the author some time.-- On Wednesday, 10:53, June 23 2010 UTC
- What was the humor in opacity? ~ The*
- I was joking...-- On Wednesday, 10:50, June 23 2010 UTC
- I've never seen it! Thanks for pointing it out, nice code. And HELPME, you may have caused some drama over at the toasters. I'm popping the popcorn now, and maybe Mordillo may have found someone to ban. Ummmmm, olive oil, dill, nutritional yeast and a touch of ume plum vinegar on the popcorn. Aleister
- I actually liked Opacity...Which article was that, by the way?-- On Wednesday, 10:46, June 23 2010 UTC
- Its all good just aggravated with the whole grammar thing i guess. and was trying to figure out the merits of Opacity it was just copy paste. was working on proofing one of my how to's and came across it. also i saw a feature that had on sentence paragraphs. oh well just trying to figure out the audience I'm writing for. ~ The*
- I wouldn't mind if you banned Paizuri.-- On Wednesday, 10:29, June 23 2010 UTC
- Bottom line - do I get to ban anyone? ~
- That's the strength and the curse of a wiki. It's open to everyone (look, HELPME got in!) and edited by anyone. Most people stop by as an IP, play around, then they find these massive complicated welcome templates on their talk page and get intimidated by such an anal approach to welcoming, and leave. Others stick around long enough to actually register with a name, and then they find people offering to blow them and to fuck them in the ass, and they leave. So the ones who stick around are usually pretty cool or crazy as fuck but with a touch of literacy. Then they write, and like HELPME stumbled on to, regular users have different tastes. Vastly different in some cases. But there are literally a couple thousand pages on this site which are very good, and hundreds which are exceptionally good. You just have to search and ask, and then appreciate some writers and scorn and spit on others. It all comes with thec territory, and makes for a great adult playground. Fun stuff. Aleister 22:19 23 6 MMX
OK now i understand, i read the page. its all good, problem straightened up. admins need a identifier for their sig. it would clarify these issues, lol ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 23:17, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Sure thing. Not an admin. 23:18, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- Psst! That's a cabal member in disguise. Just smile and walk away slowly.-- On Wednesday, 11:22, June 23 2010 UTC
- Yeah. They're like those Harry Potter Deatheaters, you feel all cold and drained of spirit when they pass you. Gives me the shivers, too. Aleister 23:24 23 6 MMX
- They do no scare me I'm married. That sucks the life out of you quicker ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 23:29, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- I think I just learned more about the site by reading this thread than I have in a long time. I hate you all. Love ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~ ~ 24 Jun 2010 ~ 01:54 (UTC)
- I think I just learned more about the site by reading this thread than I have in a long time. I hate you all. Love ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*
- They do no scare me I'm married. That sucks the life out of you quicker ~ The*
- Yeah. They're like those Harry Potter Deatheaters, you feel all cold and drained of spirit when they pass you. Gives me the shivers, too. Aleister 23:24 23 6 MMX
- Psst! That's a cabal member in disguise. Just smile and walk away slowly.-- On Wednesday, 11:22, June 23 2010 UTC
This guy doesn't know shit. Everyone knows that people only vote for your articles if you send them nudes. *Hint hint* -- shimmery Ape (bamboozle) (Riot Porn) 01:27, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
Grammer[edit source]
thanks for the correction dude, i always forgot to do that. --Sephirothwolf 22:01, June 23, 2010 (UTC)
- All in a day's work.-- On Wednesday, 10:08, June 23 2010 UTC
- Help me is always their for writer's like me that usually dont no how to put stuff in the order's that they belong in, of which Im guilty to. It doesnt get said enough how help me stop's us from doing those things. [[user:Aleister in Chains|Aleister 00:20 21 5 MMX
- AAGH! THE MISUSED COMMAS AND THE MISSED APOSTROPHES! IT BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRNS!-- On Wednesday, 10:13, June 23 2010 UTC
- Help me is always their for writer's like me that usually dont no how to put stuff in the order's that they belong in, of which Im guilty to. It doesnt get said enough how help me stop's us from doing those things. [[user:Aleister in Chains|Aleister 00:20 21 5 MMX
I voted for you[edit source]
For Uncyclopedia of the month, now stay out of trouble. i don't want to bail your ass out again like that last time--
Director
WILL
YOU 333 00:12, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
QUESTION[edit source]
I wanted to run an idea by you, i am writing a page on dislexipedia a fictional site for people with the decease. my plan is to write the entire article from right to left. I have it finished on paper and will take a bit to transfer on to the page. so before i put forth the effort i wondered if this was original enough to do? like this; .tfel ot thgir nettirw llA ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:29, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Hm. There are a couple pages that make fun of mental disorders in that sort of way (by pretending to have the disorder), but I don't think any take that direction. You may want to put it in your userspace first and then ask an admin, but I'm pretty sure it won't be a problem.-- On Thursday, 03:35, June 24 2010 UTC
- i even have a few pics that i reversed ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:39, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
- OK, now I'm positive it's fine.-- On Thursday, 03:40, June 24 2010 UTC
- i even have a few pics that i reversed ~ The*
Review....[edit source]
This; respond here... maybe? ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~ ~ 24 Jun 2010 ~ 04:30 (UTC)
I didn't forget it[edit source]
Computer started auto-updating. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 07:21, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Well, either way, I fixed everything for everyone. I rule, bitch.-- On Thursday, 07:23, June 24 2010 UTC
- yes ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 07:35, June 24, 2010 (UTC)
- yes ~ The*
The UnSignpost Is Not Dead![edit source]
The Newspaper Not Secretly Controlled By Mordillo, We Swear!
Jun 24th, 2010 • Issue 86 • Oh yeah, the UnSignpost, I remember that...
|
Conservation Week Approaches
 Fancy watering Uncyclopedia's forestry? Want to be a good conservationist? Fancy taking up the rewriting sword of justice, and righteously smiting the dragon of shit writing? Actually, the hell with that, do you want to take a bunch of bad articles, and make them suck less? Then you, my friend, are in luck! Conservation Week 2010 starts on July 5th, and actively encourages users to scour the wiki (perhaps through judicious use of Special:Random, or possibly through exploration of Category:Rewrite or Category:Ideas or even Special:Lonelypages), find lame articles that they consider are taking up the very space which could be occupied by something less sucky, and then using their skill and judgement to turn those articles into shining examples of comedic writing. As this is a competition dedicated to simultaneously reducing the number of useless articles on the wiki and increasing the number of good ones, some naysayers believe it to be completely pointless - Uncyclopedia is the worst, they say, and no amount of well-intentioned competitions can change that. But were it to exist, the Cabal would probably beg to differ. They may call it something like "a genuinely good thing", and "a ray of hope, signalling that occasionally, even the most worthless dreck may be redeemed". So if you think what your userpage is missing is a template called the "Greasy Mechanic Award", then prepare to rewrite like you've never re-written before. Just don't forget to make your new version better than the original. Something summarizing the events of the last month or so It has been said by one of our esteemed administrators here at UnSignpost that if it wasn't reported in the UnSignpost, then it didn't happen. As there has been no UnSignpost produced for the last few days, due to one of the editors having a real life, and another one being lazy, there are several things that didn't happen. Yes, the loss of the UnSignpost for so long sent a shiver down the spines of many an Uncyclopedian. So much so that one member of the community decided that it was timely to look at a new way to produce the UnSignpost. One such idea was to release a monthly periodical in the place of USP. Although there has been several attempts by this reporter to obtain a quote from said insurrectional community member, to date no response has been heard. As part of the ongoing struggle to maintain our independent stance from Wikia, several members decided that it would be a wise idea to create a way to cash in on the popularity of the site. As such the UnShoppe has been created, where you may purchase any one of a number of Uncyclopedia-related pieces of merchandise. So far all purchases have been made by the individuals who created the store. However, if you are looking for the place to buy a shirt that shows that your nipples have been featured, that a wizard did something, whatever it was, and that you have an in-depth knowledge of who Dan Kwon is. There was a competition. Congratulations go to mrthejazz, who got the pun. Imperial Colonisation has taken a brief hiatus after the new head of IC became the old head of IC. He was an Australian, and his example has inspired the entire nation so much that the new head of Parliament for the country is now the old head of parliament. Congratulations go out to the new new head of IC. A strange bandwagon has been created by a drunken Bonner, who has challenged all and sundry to ask him anything at all. As such there are various forums dedicated to asking regular Uncyclopedian members things. These previously were known as user talk pages, but who can stand in the way of progress? And that's all that didn't happen. Although now it's listed in UnSignpost that means it actually did happen. Which suggests that by editing UnSignpost I have the power to change the past. If I could change anything about the past, what would it be? I had sex with a real person![1]
|
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UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox
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A new UnSignpost issue, another template spammed onto your talkpage, enjoy! —Sir Socky
(talk) (stalk)
GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:21, 24 June 2010
Horace Donald Chesterflap[edit source]
Hello, HELPME, the toast of the town, aye. Hey, this jerk went through most of the feature noms and voted no one after the other, obviously without reading them, in a fit of what I see as vandalism. I couldn't find an admin on duty, so what do you think? I want to just revert the guy, but that would take almost as long as it took him to write them in. If you take half I'll take half, and we can both get banned together. Aleister 00:30 25 6 (Half way to "Christmas") MMX
- I would just ask an admin- this happened with another user once. I'm not too sure about this guy, though.-- On Friday, 12:34, June 25 2010 UTC
- I asked Zim. I guess I'm emotionally invested in the Well-Oiled Birds poem (I've actually married it, which is picking up some news coverage in my hometown) and it's personal when my wife is attacked by a vandal. Aleister 00:38 25 6 MMX
Pee Review Request and Thanks[edit source]
Mind reviewing this? And thank you for helping me deal with that IP prick that kept ruining up my featured article.--DirectorWILLYOU 333 21:30, June 25, 2010 (UTC)
- I'll try. I'm currently in a very lazy mode, but I can be forced out, I guess.-- On Friday, 10:22, June 25 2010 UTC
I need adoption[edit source]
I have a computer with a keyboard, a (soon to be deleted) article and am a Spartan, the only one in Uncyclopedia: the reason you'd want to adopt me. Psychotic Spartan 00:01, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Sure, I guess. Just add {{Adoptee|HELPME}} to your user page. I'll help you with anything you need.-- On Saturday, 02:10, June 26 2010 UTC
Cool, I have an owner now.Someone to annoy for questions for now own instead of answering them myself. Psychotic Spartan 02:22, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Aw, you got a
fuckbudyorphan now HelpMe. Maybe I can help inrapingtaking care of him if you like--
Director
WILL
YOU 333 02:37, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- You're finally catching up to me nooblet-wise! —Pelozurian (talk) 02:49, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- I'm jealous ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 02:58, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- You could always some over to the
darkstraight side. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:00, 26 June 2010 (UTC)- There's a difference between the dark side and the straight side?-- On Saturday, 03:02, June 26 2010 UTC
- i'm straight and afraid of the dark. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:05, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- My son is straight? Excuse me, I have to cry now. My baby can't be straight! NOOOOOO!!!!-- On Saturday, 03:07, June 26 2010 UTC
- i'm straight and afraid of the dark. ~ The*
- There's a difference between the dark side and the straight side?-- On Saturday, 03:02, June 26 2010 UTC
- You could always some over to the
- I'm jealous ~ The*
- You're finally catching up to me nooblet-wise! —Pelozurian (talk) 02:49, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- Aw, you got a
The only Difference is that the dark side does evil, and the light side does your mom.--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:06, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Then there's the rainbow side, which just does other men. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:08, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- And you owe us a favor. Get in the back room, bitch.-- On Saturday, 03:09, June 26 2010 UTC
- Well i'm evil and my mom is available for a price. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:09, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Everyone knows me now Psychotic Spartan 03:11, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I'llpay you $60000000000000000000 for you mom--DirectorWILLYOU 33303:11, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Nah, I only buy things I can take advantage of, you know?-- On Saturday, 03:12, June 26 2010 UTC
- Like Helpless 18 year olds?--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:15, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- If male, sure.-- On Saturday, 03:16, June 26 2010 UTC
- SOLD ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:13, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- SOLD ~ The*
- If male, sure.-- On Saturday, 03:16, June 26 2010 UTC
- I'llpay you $60000000000000000000 for you mom--
- Everyone knows me now Psychotic Spartan 03:11, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Well i'm evil and my mom is available for a price. ~ The*
- And you owe us a favor. Get in the back room, bitch.-- On Saturday, 03:09, June 26 2010 UTC
Also, the next person who edit conflicts me will be forcibly raped.-- On Saturday, 03:14, June 26 2010 UTC
- I'm yours Psychotic Spartan 03:17, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Not me, I hope. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:18, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- You didn't edit conflict me. Paizuri did. But if you want forcible rape, who am I to say no?-- On Saturday, 03:19, June 26 2010 UTC
- It's not rape then, it's just hardcore gay sex. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:20, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- ♫Shut up, shut up
- You're annoying us all
- Now meet me in the kitchen...♫-- On Saturday, 03:23, June 26 2010 UTC
- It's not rape then, it's just hardcore gay sex. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:20, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- You didn't edit conflict me. Paizuri did. But if you want forcible rape, who am I to say no?-- On Saturday, 03:19, June 26 2010 UTC
- Not me, I hope. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:18, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- I'm yours Psychotic Spartan 03:17, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- uh...i have noyhing here ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:21, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I'll join you HelpMe >:)--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:22, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- It's not HelpMe, it's hElpmE. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:24, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- It's better with fake rape Psychotic Spartan 03:25, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- It's "HELPME". All of you fail at caps.-- On Saturday, 03:25, June 26 2010 UTC
- I don't Psychotic Spartan 03:27, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Good. Now, if only you could use punctuation:P...-- On Saturday, 03:31, June 26 2010 UTC
- nEIthER dO i so StfU NooB —Pelozurian (talk) 03:30, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- I don't Psychotic Spartan 03:27, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- It's not HelpMe, it's hElpmE. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:24, 26 June 2010 (UTC)
- I'll join you HelpMe >:)--
- uh...i have noyhing here ~ The*
I got an idea, how about we all start raping HELPME!--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:34, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Good idea, unless you're a girl...-- On Saturday, 03:36, June 26 2010 UTC
- I don't rape new daddy Psychotic Spartan 03:35, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Cool, can I also eat your brain--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:38, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Nah...You can't unless you use punctuation properly.-- On Saturday, 03:40, June 26 2010 UTC
- well.i.guess.i.am.out ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:41, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- well.i.guess.i.am.out ~ The*
- Nah...You can't unless you use punctuation properly.-- On Saturday, 03:40, June 26 2010 UTC
- Cool, can I also eat your brain--
- I don't rape new daddy Psychotic Spartan 03:35, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
Deal. Rape and Brains, here I come--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:44, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Nope...the end of your post needs a period.-- On Saturday, 03:45, June 26 2010 UTC
- Don't forget money Psychotic Spartan 03:45, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I thought that was the bonus of guy on guy sex... not having to deal with periods. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 03:47, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I could show you what the advantage of guy on guy sex is...-- On Saturday, 03:56, June 26 2010 UTC
- FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!--DirectorWILLYOU 333 03:47, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Think again Psychotic Spartan 03:48, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Hey HELPME, if I can't rape you, can i rape your new son?--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:00, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- You'll have to ask him...-- On Saturday, 04:01, June 26 2010 UTC
- Sure why not I need the practice. Psychotic Spartan 04:03, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- You'll have to ask him...-- On Saturday, 04:01, June 26 2010 UTC
- Hey HELPME, if I can't rape you, can i rape your new son?--
- Think again Psychotic Spartan 03:48, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I thought that was the bonus of guy on guy sex... not having to deal with periods. ~ The*
- Don't forget money Psychotic Spartan 03:45, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
Ok, hold still this will hurt like hell wont hurt a bit. Rape--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:05, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- That
hurt like a watermelonfelt fan-fucking-tastic!Psychotic Spartan 04:06, June 26, 2010 (UTC) - See? You becoming a man now--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:09, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- i need a new family.... ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~
- You're just lucky User:Why do I need to provide this? isn't your dad and User:PuppyOnTheRadio isn't your uncle.-- On Saturday, 04:09, June 26 2010 UTC
- don't be crazy. Psychotic Spartan 04:08, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Ohhhh snap! ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:11, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Hey, unlike a certain one of those two, I'm decent enough to not have sex with my own son...-- On Saturday, 04:12, June 26 2010 UTC
- I really appreciate that. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:15, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I do too (my ass hurts enough anyway).Psychotic Spartan 04:17, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- WHo the hell would rape their own son?--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:19, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- You'd be surprised...-- On Saturday, 04:20, June 26 2010 UTC
- WHo the hell would rape their own son?--
- I do too (my ass hurts enough anyway).Psychotic Spartan 04:17, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I really appreciate that. ~ The*
- Hey, unlike a certain one of those two, I'm decent enough to not have sex with my own son...-- On Saturday, 04:12, June 26 2010 UTC
- Ohhhh snap! ~ The*
- i need a new family.... ~ The*
- That
Luckily I don't do that. I do what every good parent does and teach my son (if I had one) the greatness of dictatorships--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:23, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
Germans ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 04:24, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Thats what you should do HELPME. Teach your son how to be a dictator, like I'll do if I had one--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:28, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Don't listen to him, daddy, he bad.Psychotic Spartan 04:29, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- I'm not bad, I'm just a killer who kills people 333 times. But I am a bad influence--DirectorWILLYOU 333 04:31, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- Fuck, I've been
raped in assinfluenced Psychotic Spartan 04:36, June 26, 2010 (UTC)- See? I told you. But whatever you do, keep away from this guy he's even worst than me.
- I learn so fast.Psychotic Spartan 04:41, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
- See? I told you. But whatever you do, keep away from this guy he's even worst than me.
- Fuck, I've been
- I'm not bad, I'm just a killer who kills people 333 times. But I am a bad influence--
- Don't listen to him, daddy, he bad.Psychotic Spartan 04:29, June 26, 2010 (UTC)
Wow, neat bird. And writing contest[edit source]
Hi. Will you be awake for the start of the writing contest tonight? I'm trying to find someone to give me a list of three topics to pick from at about two minutes to midnight est. Fairly general topics, not like a specific band or sports team or what your dad wears to bed (oh, wait, cross out that last one, too easy). And wow, neat bird. Aleister 00:56 28 6 MMX
- The contest is based on EST, which is my timezone. I'll be awake- I'm just not thinking about it at the moment.-- On Monday, 12:59, June 28 2010 UTC
edit to far away[edit source]
Thank you[edit source]
For the review of my UnNews. You have gave me some good advice and pointed out a few mistkaes I completely missed. As for what you said, "also the whole puking up goop thing isn't very understandable. twinkies and doughnuts turn green in a zombie's stomach? zombies are attracted to zombie vomit rather than human flesh?" I assume you don't plat Left 4 Dead. Theres a type of special zombie called a Boomer, a zombie that is fat, spits out goo (called Boomer bile) that attreacts regular zombies, and explodes when killed (but gets Boomer bile on anyone who gets too close). I guess I hould've be more in-depth about that. Anyway, your help is appreciated. Thank you.--If you're 555 then I'm 
00:59, June 28, 2010 (UTC)
- That wasn't me. It was obvious, considering the grammar sucked.-- On Monday, 01:00, June 28 2010 UTC
- Oh, I didn't see the sig. Shit sorry, I thought you did it--If you're 555 then I'm
01:03, June 28, 2010 (UTC)
- Oh, I didn't see the sig. Shit sorry, I thought you did it--If you're 555 then I'm
Mind Voting for this[edit source]
Mind voting for this. Appreciate it!--If you're 555 then I'm 01:05, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- I might if I like it. I would really like if you would be funny if you whore to me. Other than that, don't. I'm an active VFH voter and I'll see it on my own.-- On Wednesday, 01:18, June 30 2010 UTC
- Would you mind nomming this at the same time? Thanks. Aleister 1:22 30 6 MMX
- I would--If you're 555 then I'm 01:24, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- I would--If you're 555 then I'm
- Would you mind nomming this at the same time? Thanks. Aleister 1:22 30 6 MMX
And by the way, If you don't want me to do something, just tell me. Don't say something sarcastic, I seriously hate that.--If you're 555 then I'm 07:34, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- I wasn't being sarcastic...-- On Wednesday, 08:02, June 30 2010 UTC
- "I would really like if you would be funny if you whore to me" Sounds sarcastic. But mabye I misinterpret what you said--If you're 555 then I'm 08:16, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- It's not.-- On Wednesday, 07:00, June 30 2010 UTC
- "I would really like if you would be funny if you whore to me" Sounds sarcastic. But mabye I misinterpret what you said--If you're 555 then I'm
- There isn't enough sex on this talk page, remedy this immediately, HELPME, or prepare to step outside with me to face a bit of rough and tumble. There, I've even started you off. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 19:09, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- The alarming sex shortage is caused by the decrease in activity from Onion69.-- On Wednesday, 07:11, June 30 2010 UTC
- That's no excuse. Go on get started, obviously I'll have to watch to make sure you do it. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 19:14, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- OK, but with who? There are too many cute straight boys here. D:-- On Wednesday, 07:15, June 30 2010 UTC
- Get started on your own and hope someone else joins in. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 19:17, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- Ah, fuck that. /me violently rapes IWKU333-- On Wednesday, 07:19, June 30 2010 UTC
- I feel refreshed--If you're 555 then I'm 19:25, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- I feel refreshed--If you're 555 then I'm
- Ah, fuck that. /me violently rapes IWKU333-- On Wednesday, 07:19, June 30 2010 UTC
- Get started on your own and hope someone else joins in. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 19:17, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- OK, but with who? There are too many cute straight boys here. D:-- On Wednesday, 07:15, June 30 2010 UTC
- That's no excuse. Go on get started, obviously I'll have to watch to make sure you do it. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 19:14, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- The alarming sex shortage is caused by the decrease in activity from Onion69.-- On Wednesday, 07:11, June 30 2010 UTC
Well-Oiled Birds[edit source]
First of all, thank you for voting for mine and Al's collaborative effort. Secondly, he and I worked out a system where I would thank the odd-numbered voters and he would thank the even-numbered voters, hence you lack of thanks from myself. Hope that clears things up. And thanks again for the vote. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 19:29, June 30, 2010 (UTC)
- Well, I deserve to be thanked twice. I am me, after all. SIR Arrogant Prick [worship me]
- You are being thanked again, and again. There is much to thank you for. There will be a Well-Oiled Horse's head in your bed when you wake up in the morning. This will be a sign of thanks. Aleister, hoping for a couple of ties tonight 21:15 30 6 MMX
Congrats[edit source]
|
Reviewer of the Month June 2010 |
Well done, keep reviewing, always wear a condom. --ChiefjusticeXBox360 00:05, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Yayzorz.-- On Thursday, 01:08, July 01 2010 UTC
- Yay! Well deserved, as was the Uncy of the Month. Would have been nicer as a tie, you voted for Ethine and all. But just wait, just wait as the award floats your way very soon. Congrats again! Al 1:14 1 7 MMX
- Nice going. Your like the last best pee reviewer (besides me) to win the award.--If you're 555 then I'm 01:18, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
- But you haven't won it, lol. Also, Chief, Skinfan, HH, BF11, UU, Puppy, Why, etc. are way better than me.-- On Thursday, 01:20, July 01 2010 UTC
- Thats my point. I'm the only one who hasn't won. I think its because I went on vacation so much in three weeks that kept me from pee reviewing.--If you're 555 then I'm 01:22, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Thats my point. I'm the only one who hasn't won. I think its because I went on vacation so much in three weeks that kept me from pee reviewing.--If you're 555 then I'm
- But you haven't won it, lol. Also, Chief, Skinfan, HH, BF11, UU, Puppy, Why, etc. are way better than me.-- On Thursday, 01:20, July 01 2010 UTC
- Nice going. Your like the last best pee reviewer (besides me) to win the award.--If you're 555 then I'm
- Yay! Well deserved, as was the Uncy of the Month. Would have been nicer as a tie, you voted for Ethine and all. But just wait, just wait as the award floats your way very soon. Congrats again! Al 1:14 1 7 MMX
Thanks!!! <3[edit source]
Awwwww, thank you for votin' for me!
Look! Now I can look at pictures of small animals and feel serious, because you voted for me. So thanks! <3
Love,
All the news that's unfit to print![edit source]
The Newspaper With Words n' Shit!
Jul 1st, 2010 • Issue 87 • More news than something with less news than us
|
Things getting boring on the wiki? Time to write at speed!
 We're still waiting for that, but until it arrives, Skull's hour-long writing contest will do nicely. Shamelessly pinching Cajek's idea of time-limited writing competitions (which brought us such classics as HowTo:Sexually Stimulate an Ant, lest we forget), but putting his own distinct spin on it, Uncyc's own mad Doctor challenged Uncyclopedians to write an article in a single hour that would survive VFD. Given Uncyclopedia's well-known exacting quality standards, this promised to be a tough task, but a surprising number of people were up for it. And so it was that a frenzy erupted across the wiki, and baffled Europeans and other users not around at the time awoke the next day to a slew of brand new articles, not all of which ended up being deleted. They liked the idea so much, they held their own a couple of days later. When asked to comment on his brainchild, the commotion and excitement it had caused, and the size of his penis, Dr. Skullthumper exclusively told us "Sure. I'll get on that. I swear". Things getting boring on the wiki? Time to start pointless drama! Giant evil multinational wiki-hosting conglomerate Wikia won a major victory last month, when a rebellion by a small but dedicated band of anti-capitalist radicals was brutally put down by a bunch of fascistic Wikia-collaborators. Or at least, that's what happened in the heads of Carlb, Roye7777777 and CartoonistHenning after they nailed their anti-Wikia manifesto to the metaphorical door of Uncyclopedia's metaphorical Wittenberg Cathedral. The 1,000-word anti-Wikia tract, despite the shocking and previously unknown revelation that Wikia was not in fact the wiki-hosting charity that it claimed to be, but rather a commercial company, failed to ignite a spontaneous revolt against Wikia among the Uncyclopedia community. A heated and sexually-charge discussion ensued, with strong arguments offered by both sides. However, it seems that some people were unable to grasp the enormity of the revelation that Wikia's motives were less than altruistic. Eventually, the thread descended into an all-out flamewar and a waaaaaaaaaaaaaahmbulance was called to treat the injured. "We may have lost this round," Carlb told UnSignpost reporters "but it is only a temporary setback. One day, the tyranny of Wikia will be no more. Our revenge will be the laughter of our children." It is rumoured that Carlb, Roye7777777 and CartoonistHenning will employ Black Bloc tactics at the next Wikia conference in an attempt to escalate the struggle against Wikia oppression. |
| ||||
| UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox | |||||
--ChiefjusticeXBox360 12:23, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
You thought I forgot?[edit source]
|
Thanks for voting Socky Uncyclopedian of the Year | 
|
| Mere words cannot express my gratitude, so I'm giving you this beautiful spinning sock star as well. |
Thanks! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:54, 1 July 2010
Thanks for the nom[edit source]
I see that you are on vacation/sabatical/fucking off or whatever, but I still wanted to say thanks for the nomination for ROTM. So.... Thanks.... and stuff. --—John Lydon 17:50, July 1, 2010 (UTC)
- Nah, I was just too lazy to get rid of that.-- On Thursday, 06:11, July 01 2010 UTC
A postcard from HELPME's vacation[edit source]
The list[edit source]
Are you entirely familiar with how to update it, as I just noticed Skinfan updating the top 5 for you? Have you read the guide properly? --ChiefjusticeXBox360 08:04, July 2, 2010 (UTC)
- DAMMIT! I knew I forgot something. I practiced it earlier, but I was kind of in a rush. That was more of a trial, anyway. I wanted to see if I could do it properly. I'm stupid.-- On Friday, 07:00, July 02 2010 UTC
- Just updated the lists. I think you need to re-read the instructions, you didn't update the scores properly. At the bottom of the list where all the averages are added up you need to replace the old numbers rather than just adding the new numbers in. read the instructions carefully, they tell you which number lists need to be added to and which ones need to have numbers replaced. Along the same lines, only change the averages total (i.e. the number after the "/") when a new user is added to the list. Any other problems/questions, hit up my or Chief's talk page, or look through the guide. --
GUN WotM RotM FBotM VFH SK Maj. ΥΣΣ 05:22 EST 4 July, 2010
- Just updated the lists. I think you need to re-read the instructions, you didn't update the scores properly. At the bottom of the list where all the averages are added up you need to replace the old numbers rather than just adding the new numbers in. read the instructions carefully, they tell you which number lists need to be added to and which ones need to have numbers replaced. Along the same lines, only change the averages total (i.e. the number after the "/") when a new user is added to the list. Any other problems/questions, hit up my or Chief's talk page, or look through the guide. --
SK review stuffs[edit source]
a suggestion, perhaps developing a signature more 'compact' for signing when doing pee review evaluations would be a good idea. And...
Congrats on ROTM!
-- Sf13 
04:05 EST 2 July, 2010
Uh Oh[edit source]
- Is that bad spelling done on purpose?-- On Saturday, 04:40, July 03 2010 UTC
- No, I don't know why that happened--If you're 555 then I'm 04:44, July 3, 2010 (UTC)
- No, I don't know why that happened--If you're 555 then I'm
helloooo[edit source]
i got featured ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 00:54, July 4, 2010 (UTC)
About That Review I Did...[edit source]
It had been booked five days ago and the booker had done anything at all. It even says on the Pee Review homepage If you put a tag on a review or otherwise promise to review it, please only do so when you start the review. Any persistent offenders who "book" a review and then don't complete it within 24 hours without further comment to explain why will earn themselves a free ban. Otherwise I wouldn't have reviewed it, but it seemed to me that that booking had expired a long time ago.--Some Idiot 06:57, July 5, 2010 (UTC)
- Well, the rationale was on User talk:Guildensternenstein. I just think you should have at least told Guildy- but what you did was borderline OK. It doesn't matter, because no one's mad, anyway.-- On Monday, 07:28, July 05 2010 UTC
Ok, then. --Some Idiot 00:42, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
Hey stupid[edit source]
How come you still have that vacation template set for June 17/18 when it's already July? —Pelozurian (talk) 08:30, 5 July 2010 (UTC)
- I'm incredibly lazy. Sue me.-- On Monday, 03:51, July 05 2010 UTC
~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 16:18, July 5, 2010 (UTC)
- I like the way Arcadian thinks. —Pelozurian (talk) 22:49, 5 July 2010 (UTC)
- Actually it was a typo....is should have read June 1718. Also, can I have my time machine back if you've finished with it. Thanks... -- Sir Mhaille (talk to me)
- Go away, British boy. I stole it from you, and you know it. At least Orian has the decency to be Scottish. -- On Wednesday, 08:05, July 07 2010 UTC
- Actually it was a typo....is should have read June 1718. Also, can I have my time machine back if you've finished with it. Thanks... -- Sir Mhaille
Hey my illegal piece of teenage ass[edit source]
How you getting on? (Also for prying members of the FBI it all happened in the UK so it's perfectly legal) Orian57 Talk 22:57 5 July 2010
- Pretty well, actually. I'm out of school until September, so I have all of the time in the world. I'm on here about 20 hours per day, basically. Oh yeah, it's also my birthday in six days.
- You still too busy these days?-- On Monday, 11:01, July 05 2010 UTC
- kinda trying to get back here though and write something as hillariouse as Sandcastle. Other than that my life has been going pretty well. Just thought I'd come over here and hang with my homies, or whatever it is the kids say these days. Orian57 Talk 23:11 5 July 2010
- Please don't. I hate it when people talk like that.
- Funny you should say that. Recently, I've been thinking about actually writing something. During school I had no time for it, but I think I can now. I just need a concept and an angle.-- On Monday, 11:13, July 05 2010 UTC
- Yo bitch I think that's a fab idea, or whatever. How about an article from the point of view of a four year old boy whose father is trying to teach him how to build a perfect sandcastle? I've found that to be a landslide success in the past. Orian57 Talk 23:18 5 July 2010
- No, then I'd have to use improper grammar. Of course, you did that to the father's grammar too, but that's just because you fail.-- On Monday, 11:20, July 05 2010 UTC
- See also my last edit summary of sandcastle. dialogue never has to follow grmaticalitalities. Orian57 Talk 23:23 5 July 2010
- Did you find it funny though? I still condider it my second best work. my best being UnBooks:Daddy, There's a Zombie in the Garden with third being Why?:Am I a Power Ranger?. Orian57 Talk 23:26 5 July 2010
- I just finished Sandcastle and I've already read the Zombie one. Those both made me actually laugh, which is really rare for me. I haven't read the Power Ranger one, though.-- On Monday, 11:31, July 05 2010 UTC
- it was one of my earlier pieces. was #7 of 2008 though. And thank you, they actually make me laugh. which isn't rare at all, I only write stuff I find physically funny at the time. Orian57 Talk 23:34 5 July 2010
- hello hello ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 00:25, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
- hello hello ~ The*
- it was one of my earlier pieces. was #7 of 2008 though. And thank you, they actually make me laugh. which isn't rare at all, I only write stuff I find physically funny at the time. Orian57 Talk
- I just finished Sandcastle and I've already read the Zombie one. Those both made me actually laugh, which is really rare for me. I haven't read the Power Ranger one, though.-- On Monday, 11:31, July 05 2010 UTC
- See also my last edit summary of sandcastle. dialogue never has to follow grmaticalitalities. Orian57 Talk
- No, then I'd have to use improper grammar. Of course, you did that to the father's grammar too, but that's just because you fail.-- On Monday, 11:20, July 05 2010 UTC
- Yo bitch I think that's a fab idea, or whatever. How about an article from the point of view of a four year old boy whose father is trying to teach him how to build a perfect sandcastle? I've found that to be a landslide success in the past. Orian57 Talk
- kinda trying to get back here though and write something as hillariouse as Sandcastle. Other than that my life has been going pretty well. Just thought I'd come over here and hang with my homies, or whatever it is the kids say these days. Orian57 Talk
Ref: your edit comment[edit source]
Force of habit, really. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 06:24, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
- Well, it is tradition to blame Mordillo.-- On Tuesday, 06:25, July 06 2010 UTC
- Wait...did Modus just post on my talk page?! I feel so special.-- On Tuesday, 06:28, July 06 2010 UTC
- This is your talkpage? Oh. What's with all the Playskool Gloworld Activity Play Mats? One, I can understand, but thirty seems pathological. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 06:45, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
- When you're an Uncyclopedia editor, you come up with some really creative sex toys. And I have thirty because I have thirty part- um, it would be best not to let you in on that.-- On Tuesday, 06:47, July 06 2010 UTC
- That's probably for the best. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 07:45, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
- When you're an Uncyclopedia editor, you come up with some really creative sex toys. And I have thirty because I have thirty part- um, it would be best not to let you in on that.-- On Tuesday, 06:47, July 06 2010 UTC
- This is your talkpage? Oh. What's with all the Playskool Gloworld Activity Play Mats? One, I can understand, but thirty seems pathological. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 06:45, July 6, 2010 (UTC)
Pee review booking[edit source]
Yeah, did you see the red text on the pee review page that says "If you put a tag on a review or otherwise promise to review it, please only do so when you start the review. Any persistent offenders who "book" a review and then don't complete it within 24 hours without further comment to explain why will earn themselves a free ban"? Just checking, because putting "I think I'll do this sometime within the next few days" is pretty much the same thing or even worse, as far as I'm concerned. If you're going to do the review, do the review, but don't just put a nebulous comment about maybe getting round to it. That manages the simultaneous tricks of putting anyone else off reviewing the article and pissing off the person waiting for the review. I'm going to go give you your free ban now, as the red text promises, but I wanted to explain fully first. Don't do it again. --UU - natter 
09:54, Jul 8
- Whoops. I gave it that because I wondered if I could make it in time. I also actually forgot part of my text. I was even going to say "Anyone can review this in the meantime, I'll just add mine on." after the first day, but I forgot. Not a very good excuse, I know.-- On Thursday, 05:06, July 08 2010 UTC
Hall of shame[edit source]
I know how much you love updating it. Want to add on where do babies come from for me? Nominally Humane! some time Friday, 03:33, Jul 9 2010 UTC
- But of course. <3-- On Friday, 04:25, July 09 2010 UTC
- Oh, you have my permission to update all my HOS stuff for life. Not that I get features that often, but when I do, updating it hurts my head. --Matfen 16:42, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
hello =[edit source]
Long time no see I have tried to make you proud. Am having fun, this place really kicks ass. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 05:18, July 9, 2010 (UTC)
- Yeah, I discovered that soon after joining. But be careful not to write too fast. Ljlego warned me about that once. -- On Friday, 05:45, July 09 2010 UTC
- You have a valid point, I think I will take a moment to reflect, then give my self a root beer enema ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 06:16, July 9, 2010 (UTC)
- You have a valid point, I think I will take a moment to reflect, then give my self a root beer enema ~ The*
Signpost: normal service resumed[edit source]
The Newspaper That Won't Tell Everyone That You Wet the Bed! Oops...
Jul 8th, 2010 • Issue 88 • Hand-stitched for comfort
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Conservation week: how's it going, and what is it anyway?
Conservation week has been running since autumn 2007, starting life in Jocke Pirat's userspace, and spending a confused few hours being called the rewrite-a-thon in an early attempt to get around the whole week-fortnight thing. The first iteration was a resounding success, and about 38 people signed up to rewrite over 50 articles (with Zombiebaron hilariously missing the point and going on a deletion spree instead), making the current iteration look like it has some work to do. However, there was no quality control at the outset - if an article was rewritten in any way, that was deemed good enough. Some of those early articles may well have been made worse, we just don't know (or can't be bothered to check). Quality control arrived later on, when erstwhile gentleman editor of this very organ Gerrycheevers stepped up to run the first 2009 CW, and ran the rule over all the rewrites personally, so that the attendant award was only bestowed on those doing quality rewrites. That task this year falls to Dexter111344, who has promised to be "harsh but harsh". Probably. So, with a prize on offer to the person with the most high quality rewrites, and plenty of time left in which to do said rewrites, the only question left is: "why haven't you entered yet"? We asked this question of one completely random user, and he exclusively told us "because I'm busy writing this week's issue of the UnSignpost, duh!" Image Request: A Retrospective
 Established in March 2005 by a user called Machinecurse, this page has been the domain of most of the legends of Uncyc image manipulation at one time or another - as one 'chopper has left, another has arisen to take their place, in some kind of Potatochop Royal Succession stylee. Or something. Whatever, the likes of Paulgb, Zombiebaron, Seeker, Sonje and, more recently, KneeChee27 and MeepStarLives have slaved over hot image editing software to fulfil the esoteric image requirements of the Uncyclopedia populace. The response time has always varied on the page, as it largely depends on how active the 'choppers are at the time, how achievable the requests actually are, and how polite the request is. But for those with a little patience, it is undoubtedly a useful resource in the ongoing quest for that perfect image of Mario and Master Chief riding Pikachu down the Death Star Trench run. Or something. Have a look at the gallery to see some of the more recent work. |
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Oh dear god, am I really doing this again? --UU - natter 11:01, Jul 9
Yet Another Worthless Award[edit source]
As YOU voted for BIBLE! to be featured on the front page,
this FRAMED, VERY RARE and HIGH COLLECTIBLE
JESUS AND LINDSAY LOHAN
issue of the magazine is YOURS TO KEEP!
Generations to come will thank you for this wonderful keepsake.
Rabbi Techno 
kvetch 
Contribs 
FOXES 11:27, July 9, 2010 (UTC)
Guess what?[edit source]
I made this as a response for that. (Now I feel all YOUTUBEy, ick!) ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~ ~ 09 Jul 2010 ~ 23:44 (UTC)
i had a mean idea[edit source]
was playing around with code, and noticed if I put this in my sig everywhere i left a sig it would leave that damn dancing rubber behind. you have to put it between the ]] [[ somewhere in the middle. <span style="position:fixed;top:273px;left:115px">[[File:Rdancer.gif|right]] </span> – Preceding unsigned comment added by Lordarcadian (talk • contribs)
Collabs don't count?[edit source]
Where does it say that, good sir? —Pelozurian (talk) 07:42, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
- I thought it said that. In fact, I can swear it did. It's a weird territory since you didn't write your own feature; you should probably ask an admin. Also, I'm going to go vandalise your userpage.-- On Saturday, 07:44, July 10 2010 UTC
- I'm pretty sure collabs count as half a feature each, and Tim Burton was my second featured collab. Also, I'm going to revert you. —Pelozurian (talk) 07:49, 10 July 2010 (UTC)
Welcome aboard![edit source]
Get to shoving the poop piles. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 08:31, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
- /me pushes Dexter HA!-- On Saturday, 08:32, July 10 2010 UTC
- Well, you better be here if I ever am in the hospital for an extended period of time again. Which, from the way I'm feeling as of late, could be soon. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 08:39, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
- You probably got the poop in a cut. Next thing you know, you have sepsis.-- On Saturday, 08:40, July 10 2010 UTC
- See what I mean? Piece of piss really, isn't it? :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch
Contribs 
FOXES 08:57, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
- You shouldn't talk about Dexter that way. ;) (Haha, pwned. Again.)-- On Saturday, 08:59, July 10 2010 UTC
- See what I mean? Piece of piss really, isn't it? :-) Rabbi Techno
- You probably got the poop in a cut. Next thing you know, you have sepsis.-- On Saturday, 08:40, July 10 2010 UTC
- Well, you better be here if I ever am in the hospital for an extended period of time again. Which, from the way I'm feeling as of late, could be soon. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 08:39, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
I figure I should tell you who all came before you:
- "Wait! Isn't this a chick?!"
- "Music-man."
- "Angry little Britcunt-robot."
- "Hey, YOU'RE NOT UNKNOWN USER!! GO FUCK YOURSELF!"
- "A really big tree."
- "Filthy well-poisoning Jew rat kike who apparently is named John (WTF, right?)"
- "Brain-damaged ever since the day he was born."
Yep. You're the eighth member of the most elite group on Uncyclopedia. It's enough for you to become suicidal, ain't it? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:05, July 10, 2010 (UTC)
Disneyfan[edit source]
You might as well allow him to continue deleting bits and pieces from his talkpage, since it is his talkpage after all. Stick him on Ban Patrol the moment he creates another userpage like he has been doing, though - he's had two warnings so next time a ban's in order. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 17:06, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
- Yeah, OK. I was hoping the first rollback would knock sense into him, but I guess not. Well, just because he blanks our messages doesn't mean they aren't in the history. ;)-- On Sunday, 05:11, July 11 2010 UTC
Your family is dead[edit source]
Everybody but POTR seems to have left you. Sad, really. —Pelozurian (talk) 17:22, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
- He's enough for me, anyway. Although I do think it's sad that daddy missed my birthday. What an asshole.-- On Sunday, 06:36, July 11 2010 UTC
- i am with holding my birthday wishes till i find a decent gift. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 19:05, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
- was it bad? ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 20:42, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
- I suppose I'll have to update it eventually to fit in Lordarcadian and that other guy you adopted. It'll have to wait until I get Photoshop back though, probably when school starts again. And yes, his birthday was terrible without any of his relatives to celebrate with him, so you should give your daddy a nice present. —Pelozurian (talk) 21:06, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
- was it bad? ~ The*
- i am with holding my birthday wishes till i find a decent gift. ~ The*
if you need any programs let me know i am a damn good pirate. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 21:14, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
- i have a key gen for CS5 ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 21:23, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
- Ooooh! Gimme gimme gimme! —Pelozurian (talk) 21:26, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
- i have a key gen for CS5 ~ The*
send email to prolinejames@yahoo.com ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 21:33, July 11, 2010 (UTC)
You still have me[edit source]
Family-friend-brother, or something. ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π ~ ~ 12 Jul 2010 ~ 06:37 (UTC)
- Damn, I hate having to settle for stuff.-- On Monday, 06:40, July 12 2010 UTC
- That's one of the funniest section titles and pic I've seen here. Reading through the names, and seeing the head "Your family is dead". lol. Feature. Al 1:58 13 7
- I know, I'm a comedic genious when it comes to talkpage headers. —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:03, 13 July 2010 (UTC)
- And nothing else.-- On Tuesday, 05:04, July 13 2010 UTC
- FU HEP! —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:19, 13 July 2010 (UTC)
- And nothing else.-- On Tuesday, 05:04, July 13 2010 UTC
- I know, I'm a comedic genious when it comes to talkpage headers. —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:03, 13 July 2010 (UTC)
- That's one of the funniest section titles and pic I've seen here. Reading through the names, and seeing the head "Your family is dead". lol. Feature. Al 1:58 13 7
NEW GIFT[edit source]
I put this thing on your user page it goes back to talk try it. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 01:51, July 13, 2010 (UTC)
Can I fuck your pink boi-hole?[edit source]
I'm really sorry. You bring out the worst in me. Orian57 Talk 16:46 13 July 2010
- That's really why I'm here. Even though you missed my birthday. Ass.-- On Tuesday, 04:58, July 13 2010 UTC
- Ghey. Nominally Humane! some time Thursday, 00:36, Jul 15 2010 UTC
I'm onto your Little Game...[edit source]
So take this!
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My plans for world domination are nearly complete now that HowTo:Survive the Titanic was featured!Thank you for your part in bringing about the end of the world. |
Another UnSignpost! Rejoice![edit source]
The Newspaper That DOESN'T Think It's Better Than You!
Jul 15th, 2010 • Issue 89 • Made with 100% recycled vuvuzelas
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The 40+ club expands
 We asked them all for quotes, and Mhaille exclusively told us: ""Go eat more shit, fuckers"...obviously I am excited to have reached the BIG 4-0, and am delighted that enough of my peers deem the quality of my work good enough to have reached that figure, although I have to say I'm a little pissed that at least 10 other of my articles are feature-worthy and are constant overlooked (lengthy bans will ensue, I'm sure), I am equally as proud of my featured images, as well as many of my other contributions that I hope that my peers feel have augmented the work of others. That I am still here after five long years, and still contributing says something about Uncyclopedia itself. What that is, I wouldn't like to speculate. But sometimes you have to in order to accumulate. Apparently." Which is such a long quote we're going to need at least one blatant filler box in the right-hand panel. Bastard. Meanwhile, Modus exclusively told us "It's not that myself and Mhaille have written so very many great and fantastic pages that have, and will continue to, entertain the people for years to come. It's just that Mhaille did. "I" am one of his many sockpuppets. He writes as "Modusoperandi" when he needs a page without a "foreign" accent. Look around. There are a bunch more Mhaille sockpuppets here, too. Hyperbole, for one. Mhaille is like a wet Mogwai." Which is more concise, and therefore OK. Finally, Hype exclusively commented: "I'd like to say thank you to Uncyclopedia for voting to feature my many excellent, high-quality articles, including the drunken insistence that you accept a diseased poodle, the song about having sex with sporting goods, and the blatantly racist tirade about having to wait too long for a Pee Review. Writing 39.5 features has been literally the most important accomplishment I will ever have in my life. I look forward to continuing to service each and every one of you in the future." Which was nice of him. So, the burning question now has to be: who will be first to 50? Modus obviously has the lead, but Mhaille is writing in greater volume than he has for some time, and if Hype keeps up the pace, he's probably a good bet. But they're not the only candidates - Sog is coming up the rails rapidly, and could reach the 40 mark even quicker than Hype - could he overtake the lot of them? The only thing certain is that with these guys around, Uncyc should be assured of some half-decent articles amongst the dross. World Cup over - Romartus struggling for UnNews inspiration
 The scourge of Junior Uncyclopedia has discovered his muse in the planet's biggest sporting event, and has been cranking out UnNews articles on the subject at an alarming rate. Now, without Jabulani balls, biting tackles and Messi long shots to inspire him, what is there to inspire him to maintain such prolific standards? Suspicions abound that the Tour De France is passing him by, he seems far too English to care about the various draft and transfer shenanigans in the NFL and NBA and the like, and as the only story to emerge from golf's Open Championship so far is Tiger Woods changing his putter (wow, someone hold me back), that seems unlikely to unleash his inner news-hound. With a worrying lack of global sporting tournaments on the horizon, will we have to wait another 4 years for the next Romartus article splurge? Stay tuned to UnNews to find out! |
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—Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 10:25, 16 July 2010
Poopsmith business[edit source]
Need to talk to you. Can you come on Skype? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 05:57, July 17, 2010 (UTC)
- No, I don't have it downloaded and my sister said it slowed her computer. I'm scared. But, I'll be happy to talk to you in private somehow. Of course, I could just get over it and download Skype.-- On Saturday, 06:05, July 17 2010 UTC
- Hmm... Can you get on IRC quick then? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 06:10, July 17, 2010 (UTC)
- Yeah.-- On Saturday, 06:12, July 17 2010 UTC
- Lulz. Pokemon. And if anyone was interested in the chat we had, it was about the nutritional value of feces. Cause I eat my own shit. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 08:02, July 17, 2010 (UTC)
- Yeah.-- On Saturday, 06:12, July 17 2010 UTC
- Hmm... Can you get on IRC quick then? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 06:10, July 17, 2010 (UTC)
Showdown for Cookies[edit source]
Hello there HELPME. Congratulations! You have been chosen to be one of our not-so-special judges for the writers showdown that will be between Aleister in Chains and me Happymonkey39. This will be a showdown were we give each other a name of an unwritten article and we must write as much as we can in 1 hour and 15 minutes. Then our 5 judges will choose which article is better overall. A template on how it shall be evaluated will be given later.
This showdown will be held at 10:30EDT, please convert the time yourself. At 11:50EDT each judge will review each article and chose which he finds best. The user with the most votes wins. And yes the prize will be cookies, the loser must give 100 cookies to the winner on the users talk page.
So are you willing to be an unhonorable judge? --Happymonkey39 
Dah Meme Master 16:31, July 17, 2010 (UTC)
- Hi. Happymonkey is setting this up, and making his arrangements. Just want to say that if you do judge it doesn't have to be right after the "event" but can be tomorrow, the next day, etc. And I better whore Marilyn Monroe here (jeez, I wish I could have been MM's pimp) as she only has five votes and deserves many more. She deserves the world in fact, at her feet, but she's dead, so this is the best we can do short of. . .well, short of that thing about her crypt and all. Thanks. Aleister 16:15 20 7
Since you're such a pisser...[edit source]
I figure I may as well ask you.
Is it generally considered bad practice to threaten to kill people and/or sell their kidneys in a pee review? ~ 
Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20100719 - 16:09 (UTC)
- It is OK to do that when requesting a review, but not in a review. That is the holy law of the land.-- On Monday, 04:17, July 19 2010 UTC
- Hmm... guess that is why I asked. Alright, thanks. ~
Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20100719 - 16:28 (UTC)
- Hmm... guess that is why I asked. Alright, thanks. ~
Pee Queue thing[edit source]
So yeah, at least one person has bitched in the forums that the queue is getting lengthy - it must be time for action! I'm respectfully requesting that every active peeing member do one or two reviews this week to hammer that sucker right down. You may already have done some, I'm just copy/pasintg this message on to your page, so don't feel slighted, just feel I'm lazy - you'll be right. But if you haven't done any, do you think you could rattle a review or two off this week? Let's show 'em what we can do when we can be arsed! --UU - natter 20:36, Jul 19
- Yeah, I've done one already, and I may do another.-- On Wednesday, 06:42, July 21 2010 UTC
Thanks[edit source]
I want to thank you for voting for on my article Dear Mr. Hornet.-- 18:33, July 20, 2010 (UTC)
Pee List[edit source]
You can put self yes on the pee list. Remember, your a fucking steel kidney, dammit!--If you're 555 then I'm 06:12, July 21, 2010 (UTC)
- I don't like doing that. I'm worried I might not have such a great review and will be biased when judging it. Paranoid? Probably.-- On Wednesday, 06:34, July 21 2010 UTC
- Wussy. LOL--If you're 555 then I'm 07:41, July 21, 2010 (UTC)
- Wussy. LOL--If you're 555 then I'm
lost me[edit source]
there are 4 fors and no against how is that 3 ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 05:35, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- No, there aren't. There are 3 fors.-- On Thursday, 05:37, July 22 2010 UTC
- just for the record that was an huge help. really clarified a lot.
- In case you're being sarcastic, think about this: If "spiritual for" was an actual vote, how could Al make two of them? You can only have one vote.-- On Thursday, 05:49, July 22 2010 UTC
- that would have explained it fine now i understand it. much better thank you ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 05:52, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- sorry about the trouble it's been a shitty day. finished cleaning up my office now I'm going kayaking for a while. will check up in evenings but not adding or writing right now. just reading and voting. thank you for the assistance on the wiki stuff. ~ The* (say shit) (My train wrecks) Π ~ 06:48, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- I love sarcassism--If you're 555 then I'm 19:09, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- 18:33, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User:Athyria (→Hmm...) (top)
- I love sarcassism--If you're 555 then I'm
- sorry about the trouble it's been a shitty day. finished cleaning up my office now I'm going kayaking for a while. will check up in evenings but not adding or writing right now. just reading and voting. thank you for the assistance on the wiki stuff. ~ The*
- that would have explained it fine now i understand it. much better thank you ~ The*
- In case you're being sarcastic, think about this: If "spiritual for" was an actual vote, how could Al make two of them? You can only have one vote.-- On Thursday, 05:49, July 22 2010 UTC
- just for the record that was an huge help. really clarified a lot.
- 15:19, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) Template talk:Taxobox (Ghah, formatting.) (top)
- 15:19, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) Template talk:Taxobox
- 14:51, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User talk:Lyrithya (→You're an idiot.: new section)
- 14:50, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User:Athyria (o___O)
- 14:45, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User:Athyria
- 14:31, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) N File:Illustration Athyrium filix-femina0.jpg (Fern stolen from Wikipedia) (top)
- 14:18, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User:Athyria (Stupid.)
- 14:17, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User talk:Paizuri (→*poke*...Nrrrr.)
- 14:13, June 7, 2010 (hist) (diff) User talk:Paizuri (→*poke* Help. Please.)
- 18:20, July 2, 2009 (hist) (diff) m Wine (program)
- 18:18, July 2, 2009 (hist) (diff) Wine (→See also)
- 18:17, July 2, 2009 (hist) (diff) Wine (→See also)
- 18:14, July 2, 2009 (hist) (diff) N Wine (program) (Muffins.)
- 16:56, July 2, 2009 (hist) (diff) N User:Athyria (←Created page with ' Athyria does not exist. Athyria is merely a stolen name to use with stolen ideas while stealing time and bandwidth and grammatical precepts. Or something. Stuff t...')
- its the same person plus there was more from ip not registered as per her user page. she wrote it not me71.51.120.60 19:22, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
but yes i do agree i did not realize he had so many edits.71.51.120.60 19:24, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Nope, he's still barely eligible. Only by a few days.-- On Thursday, 07:30, July 22 2010 UTC
june second 2009 to now is a few days? it's over a year. 71.51.120.60 19:32, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- Heh, whoops. I was looking at the top. Well, I'm not sure what applies with this situation. It wasn't an account, it was just an IP, so it's a gray area... -- On Thursday, 07:34, July 22 2010 UTC
it was she had 2 accounts look at her talk page cheif started the conversation. then on her user page there is a claim to the ip. There was 2 user acount and an additional ip. Cheif told her she had to stick with one of them. 71.51.120.60 19:39, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- i just thought it was unfair to the others like miley who got denied.71.51.120.60 19:40, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
- The Athyria thing was from last month, so it doesn't matter.-- On Thursday, 07:42, July 22 2010 UTC
Read all about it! The UnSignpost rides again![edit source]
Word to your mother.
Jul 22nd, 2010 • Issue 90 • Suddenly, Signpost!
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UnNews hits warp factor Whore
 That bastard child of Uncyclopedia and WikiNews, UnNews, is in full-on whoring mode. Tired of being relegated to the bilge hold of Uncyc, staff have collectively and to a man, woman or it, decided to resort to the time-honored tradition of whoring themselves for attention. 2010 is shaping up to be a record year for lots of stuff, which I am too lazy to actually reference. We've had lots of cool coding happenings, resulting in a facelift to the Main Page, and a really cool navigation bar giving access to a plethora (well, 7 sections in fact) of sections including Sports, Comics, Editorials, and special coverage of the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. Contributors to UnNews of note are Funnybony, SPIKE, Romartus, Modusoperandi, Mordillo, Multiliteralist, PuppyOnTheRadio, Happytimes, Matt lobster and MrN9000 (when the bugger's here). Apologies to anybody I've missed. The Newsroom, home to nefarious plots and odd ideas, has once again become an active core of resistance against Uncyc's unofficial policy of ignoring us. Always leading edge, UnNews is acquiring a stable of notable personalities for a new series of Uncolumns called "Reductio ad Hitlerum", a guest column that invites persons of note to do an article for us, usually under threat of blackmail. Discussion here, first RaH column here by guest Sarah Palin. Techno gets Mhaille'd
 The award is, unusually on vote-happy Uncyclopedia, not decided on by voting, but is bestowed at the sole discretion of feature-monster, bureaucrat, whoring legend and token Liverpool fan Mhaille, according to his own criteria. Looking down the list of previous winners - Shandon, ENeGMA, Tompkins, Zombiebaron, Prettiestpretty, Savethemooses and the rest, it's pretty clear that the good Rabbi is a) in good company, and b) not going to be here much longer. |
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--ChiefjusticeXBox360 14:06, July 22, 2010 (UTC)
Noob[edit source]
And on h talk page, another section, where s/he says that s.he found Lungs a page s.he wrote in '009. Aleister 18:39 23 7
HELPME[edit source]
I had a really hard time with this Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/ADD I had to read it 6 times. I tried to give a good review. He asked me to review it was i too harsh? I tried not to be. Need advice. Lordarcadian 07:13, July 24, 2010 (UTC)
- Your scoring was a bit harsh and I had a bit of trouble reading a couple of sentences, but it was OK otherwise.-- On Saturday, 03:39, July 24 2010 UTC
- what do you typically give it for no pictures 0 or a 5? Lordarcadian 15:45, July 24, 2010 (UTC)
- A 0, as it says in UN:PRG. I thought your humor score was a bit harsh, though. My scoring scale: Give it a 4 if you think it deserves a rewrite, a 3 if it it deserves a hard rewrite, a 2 if it's VFD level, and a 1 if it belongs on ICU. A 6 is for articles that are pretty good overall, but needing of some help. A 7 is for good articles. An 8 is for probable features. A 9 is for something you would definitely vote for on VFH. Don't give 10s. Seriously.-- On Saturday, 03:53, July 24 2010 UTC
- i guess it wasn't too bad then i really thought it needed a rewrite. It started out so far off the subject. It was a rant. I really expected a play on the theme. but there is room for potential in the rest. Lordarcadian 16:00, July 24, 2010 (UTC)
- A 0, as it says in UN:PRG. I thought your humor score was a bit harsh, though. My scoring scale: Give it a 4 if you think it deserves a rewrite, a 3 if it it deserves a hard rewrite, a 2 if it's VFD level, and a 1 if it belongs on ICU. A 6 is for articles that are pretty good overall, but needing of some help. A 7 is for good articles. An 8 is for probable features. A 9 is for something you would definitely vote for on VFH. Don't give 10s. Seriously.-- On Saturday, 03:53, July 24 2010 UTC
- what do you typically give it for no pictures 0 or a 5? Lordarcadian 15:45, July 24, 2010 (UTC)
Policy[edit source]
I saw your note on VFD, and realized after answering it you may not look at it again. Something over a week old? I recently had a page of mine I like, which is months old, huffed by an admin who shall remain nameless except for his particularly tasty legs, and have had no luck in getting it mainspaced again. Now on my user space. Where is this strange policy you speak of, sire? Aleister 22:47 25 7
- It wasn't on QVFD- TKF just wanted to delete it. The only time old pages can be QVFD'd is by author request.-- On Sunday, 10:50, July 25 2010 UTC
- Ah, ok. Huh? Aleister 23:00 25 7
- Helpful link. —Sir Socky
(talk) (stalk)
GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 23:04, 25 July 2010
- Thanks, I've read it several times, esp. since my page went south for the winter. I still can't find where it fits in, so have assumed it fell into the top template marking the policy as an ignorable policy. Aleister 23:09 25 7
- Helpful link. —Sir Socky
- Ah, ok. Huh? Aleister 23:00 25 7
?[edit source]
How goes it father? We don't communicate enough. Lets go fishing or play catch. It's no wonder I need therapy. Lordarcadian 01:30, July 27, 2010 (UTC)
- That's not the reason you need therapy. I did warn you though; I'm into incest.-- On Tuesday, 01:54, July 27 2010 UTC
- Lies, Lies, Its acually funny really. how old are you? Lordarcadian 01:57, July 27, 2010 (UTC)
- I turned 17 a little over two weeks ago.-- On Tuesday, 01:58, July 27 2010 UTC
- now that's funny. I have a son that is 16. Lordarcadian 02:04, July 27, 2010 (UTC)
- Stop cramping my style, old man. (Ironically, Miley Spears adopted by adopter, Why do I need to provide this?. Miley is my age and Why is about yours. It's tradition.)-- On Tuesday, 02:08, July 27 2010 UTC
- now that's funny. I have a son that is 16. Lordarcadian 02:04, July 27, 2010 (UTC)
- I turned 17 a little over two weeks ago.-- On Tuesday, 01:58, July 27 2010 UTC
- Lies, Lies, Its acually funny really. how old are you? Lordarcadian 01:57, July 27, 2010 (UTC)
Wait, what?![edit source]
A wizard did it was featured?! And Filial Piety?! Wow, Uncyc jumped a few distant cousins of Jaws while I was gone. Ugh.
And no, I can't see much wrong with your points (not familiar with the politics around here, though), yet I keep coming back for whatever reason. Again, ugh. Oh, and sorry if I encouraged any of this in any way. To reiterate, ugh. 
Sir MacMania GUN—[03:29 28 Jul 2010]
- Tell me about it. But don't worry about me- I'll still be around whenever you need me. I just won't be the recent changes monster I once was.-- On Wednesday, 03:31, July 28 2010 UTC