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Today's featured article may overheat your computer if you try to see it Albert Arnold "Al" Gore, Jr. (allegedly born March 31, 1948) is purported to be a prominent liberal spokesperson for and inventor of global warming and environmentalism. He is portrayed by the liberal media as an author, a businessperson, former journalist, inventor of the algorithm, and recipient of a scientific prize. According to Wikipedia, Gore has served as United States Vice President, Senator, and Representative, and has also served as a military journalist during the Vietnam War. However, despite efforts by the liberal media to prove otherwise, there is no completely irrefutable evidence that Al Gore exists. (Full article...) Recently featured: Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Conspiracy Theory Generator Why?:Is there a monkey in my fridge? Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can wait for your favorite articles to be featured. You're in for a long night!! Download article feed plugin for Google Desktop edit Selected anniversaries March 5: Jump to the Beat of the Party Line Day (Turkey) 1914 - Preparations for the wildest party known to mankind are well on their way 1947 - The wildest party known to mankind begins today, death tolls are still rising. 1991 - Emperor George Bush, Sr. takes over all of the Americas, except Hawaii. 1999 - The party almost stops over fear of the Y2K Bug. Then someone gets a fly swatter. Party continues. 2006 - Party nearly ends due to sudden Bird Flu epidemic. Ends with Bird Flu being deported to Britain and the death of Big Bird. Party Continues. 2008 - Aliens invade the Eastern Seaboard, destroying the cities of New York and Washington, D.C., party suspended until Will Smith blows up their mothership. 2148 - End of the World, the Turks party in Heaven, with Allah, Buddha and Jesus. Archived Anniversaries	Word of yesterday, just finished loading shiny Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize (Pictured) Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Privacy-infringing Nanny state officials enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Files • War Special Combat Operation in Iran Recent deaths: Team Canada's pride • Some nerd named Robert Carradine • Warner Bros. bidding war • Neil Sedaka • Ali Khamenei, et. al, Undetermined: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Upcoming deaths: Weed • Dancin' Maduro • Iran • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Need advice? Ask Cthulhu! More Current (by the time the page loads they won't be anymore) Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... ... that President Hoover (Pictured) was an actual hoover? ... that the police are at your door? ... that the amount of cats in the area is directly proportionate to the distance from the Hot Dog factory? ... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE! ... that in an experiment known as Monty Hall problem, if you never make up your mind about which door to choose, the goat behind the door will grow tired and burst out? ... that the average human male between the ages of 18 and 42 has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once? ... that Joe Biden stepped in dog shit? ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven? Do you care... ... that Lost Labyrinth is a cannibal? (Pictured) ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit? ... that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth? ... tennis isn't just a game? ... that two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane? ... that the Kingfisher does not dine exclusively on kings, but also hunts queens, emperors, princes, dukes, viceroys and any other high-ranking members of the nobility? ... that the lawman/outlaw Wild Bill Hickok had one of the most celebrated mustaches in the Wild West? ... that you can fry a potato but not a potatoe, according to the Potato-tomato theorem? Wait More
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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