Uncyclopedia talk:Noob of the Moment

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Are you guys seriously going to do this? cuz it's been almost a month since I nominated him, he's almost ineligible!--slack 18:27, 28 Apr 2005 (EDT)

Sorry for the implication that you forgot this, didn't read the full rules (attach the stone of shame)--slack 18:29, 28 Apr 2005 (EDT)

Remove the stone of shame, attach the stone of triumph! But seriously, it's the 3rd, ya gonna pick someone?--slack 13:44, 3 May 2005 (EDT)

nominations ending[edit source]

what day does nominations end this month (december 25??) k3vin 19:39, 30 Dec 2005 (UTC)

Probably sometime in mid-February. We're pretty lax around here. --—rc (t) 19:40, 30 Dec 2005 (UTC)

Comments[edit source]

Can we pretty pretty please keep the personal arguments and comments to a minimum. If there is something you need to discuss with one of the nominees, you could at least have the common courtesy to discuss it with them in private, on their talk page. Furthermore, there is no reason to bash people with your votes, It's very rude and disrespectful. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 17:30, 5 March 2006 (UTC)
Tompy baby, Im sorry. It's just I had to explain why I voted against Village, and I don't want the NotM to be someone who votes only along personal line...ie I pissed him off with my clever wit, and so he votes against anything I do in the future. --The Zombiebaron 18:06, 5 March 2006 (UTC)

Whatever, I was only partially referring to you, it happened on the other nomination as well. And just for future reference, it only makes it worse when you respond, so if you must respond, do it on a different page. HOMESTAR ME!!! TURTLE ME!!! t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 18:15, 5 March 2006 (UTC)

If I were an admin both of u, Zombie and V.I, would be pretty close to get a ban for insulting each other. V.I would be closer though. But I'm not, so who cares...--Rataube 18:27, 5 March 2006 (UTC)
And I would ban you, sir, for spelling you as "u" in such a hous of knowlage. Wait, insulting people is a bannable offence? --The Zombiebaron 18:32, 5 March 2006 (UTC)

Maybe Insulting uncyclopedians for silly childish reasons should be.--Rataube 18:46, 5 March 2006 (UTC)

Maybe you not noticing me misspelling house (spelling it hous was a joke) should bee. --The Zombiebaron 19:31, 5 March 2006 (UTC)

If I wern't an admin, I'd suggest an admin ban all of you. Rar! --Splaka 05:43, 6 March 2006 (UTC)

Failed Nominations[edit source]

That slashed text stuff looks nasty and makes the page a mess. I'm moving here the irregular nominations. -- herr doktor needsApistol Rocket.gif [scream!] 13:51, 15 May 2007 (UTC)

Digimon[edit source]

Score: 0

--Digimon 01:12, 11 May 2007 (UTC)

Ineligible. No self-noms. –—Hv (talk) 11/05 14:10

Zana Dark (talk) – contribs (newdel)edit-countblock (remlist)all logsgroupscheckuser[edit source]

Score: +1
  • Nom and for Within just 3 days of his/her arrival, he/she has been doing a great deal of work to make Uncyclopedia a better place. I believe that this award will be most appropriate in commemoration of his/her duties. --General Insineratehymn 04:02, 12 May 2007 (UTC)
    • Oh fuck. I just realized that this person is more than one month old. --General Insineratehymn 04:03, 12 May 2007 (UTC)

Thenick606 (talk) – contribs (newdel)edit-countblock (remlist)all logsgroupscheckuser[edit source]

Score: 0 very lame nickmanes
  • Nominating. I received this kid some days ago, (s)he started Industrialization, a promising WIP, in raw HTML, no wiki format - so we at least can rest assured he's not from wikipedia nor ED. -- herr doktor needsApistol Rocket.gif [scream!] 15:26, 14 May 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment: Rejected the prize in his page, in an unpolite manner. Calling NotM "stupid prize"? What a N00b! -- herr doktor needsApistol Rocket.gif [scream!] 13:51, 15 May 2007 (UTC)

clarification[edit source]

Can the definition of Noob be clarified? It says member of no more than 30 days. 30 days from when? - since the voting goes for a month. Maybe having begun no earlier than the previous month? (e.g., not before July 1 for August Noob of the month). Slithy Tove 06:40, 15 August 2007 (UTC)

That rule is poor. It has kept me from nomming two awesome n00bs. :( --THINKER 15:55, 15 August 2007 (UTC)

Well think about this hypothical example:

  • 15 year old kid goes on Uncyclopedia and creates a login
  • He doesn't go on for a year
  • He remembers about uncyclopedia and goes on
  • He makes brilliant articles
  • But he can't be nominated, because he's been on this site for longer that 30 days, (in fact he has only been a user for a few hours)
  • He has to make do with just all the other prizes on Uncyclopedia.
  • That's bad!

--I like cheese 11:38, 16 December 2007 (UTC)

Tis true I like cheese That would be unfair, but how else can you judge who is a n00b? You would need a hard and fast way of defining what a 'fair' n00b is and what a fair n00b is not. How about if the n00b in question logged on once a month, for 6 months, did two edits each time and then left again for the month... After 6 months of this the user then becomes very active in one month and then gets a nom for n00b of the month. During that 6 months they were probably reading the site a fair bit also, and would have been learning all sorts of things which would be making them less n00bish all the time... I think the problem is that although the case which you described would be a tad unfair we do need a solid defined rule to follow. What else would we use?
In the particular case you describe of a guy who still remembers his login password after 12 month of inactivity? That's no n00b. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 13:45, Dec 16
Wanna hear a funny story, MrN? Well, it's not so much "funny" as it is "in direct contradiction to your final thought". I made my login on April 6, 2006 (upon reading teenagers, but I digress), and then proceeded to become COMPLETELY inactive until December 16 (upon reading prog rock, but I digress again, this time purposely), whereupon I began my saga of barraging Uncyclopedia with crap.
What's that you say? Eight months isn't twelve months? Well, screw you and your semantics, bud!-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 14:02, 16 December 2007 (UTC)
I'm sure there are some exceptions. What's your suggestion for how we could judge who is a n00b, bud? MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 21:56, Dec 16
Hrm, you seem to have taken my innocuous personally. Sorry for that. I have no problem with the noob regulations as they stand, though they could do with some sort of stab at the literacy tests employed by Jim Crow laws....ah, pomposity!-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 23:41, 16 December 2007 (UTC)

Person arguements not kept to a minimum.[edit source]

Look Max, it says keep the personal arguments to a minimum. No it doesn't. Yes it does!! Well this is a minimum. No it isn't yes it is! If this is a minimum then why did you just respond to me? But I didn't just respond to you! Yes you did, ha, got you. Err, that wasn't a response! That was an inquiry. And inquiry to what? Responses. No it wasn't. Sure it was. Prove it. Ok fine I will then. You do that. Ha, I tricked you, this is not a minimum anymore. Damn you sucker, but we're still not having a personal argument. I said, we're still not having a personal argument. Sorry sir, but your ten minutes is up. No it isn't! 'Fraid I can't argue with you unless you pay more. --MaddMax 00:36, 21 December 2007 (UTC)

Dam it's a close one this month![edit source]

Can I clear something up... If a person votes against, can they also vote for someone else? Unless of course it's RC in which case everyone obviously does whatever the hell they want. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 01:48, Dec 28

Against whatever he said, for rcmurphy. Boomer New Years.png Happy New Years! Shouldn't I be partying? PEEING 01:51, 28 December 2007 (UTC)
Votes concerning Rcmurphy do not apply to the actual election. However, other than the Rcmurphy exception, then yeah. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 00:42, 30 December 2007 (UTC)

Alright, I'ma fight for YTTE's right to partay.[edit source]

So I guess I'll try to open up some dialog here, even though we've got five days until the NotM is named. YTTE has already received an overwhelming majority of the votes out there for this month. But, according to TKF, he's now ineligible due to some edits back in late February. This makes him two months old, not one.

Personally, I don't give a shit. YTTE has been nothing but helpful during his stay. He's one of the better noobs this site has seen, writing good articles, giving great Pee Reviews, and being friendly, approachable, proactive, and just a great Uncyclopedian. He's a model noob, and I don't think he deserves to have his award taken away from him on a technicality. I think it's unfair and I'd like it if we made an exception for this month.

On the flip side, you may say "Uh, SysRq, won't that kinda undermine NotM and make it less meaningful if we're willing to bend the rules to every noob that has someone stick up for him? Rules are there for a reason, we have to be consistent!" I agree, that's a valid point. This is why I am going to propose a new rule for NotM. Suck it.

Any nominated user later found to be ineligible (by no more than another 30 days) must have a number of votes majority over the other nominees.

Now, I'm not going to say any number right now, because I would like some feedback on this proposal before I even start worrying about minor details. I'm open to respectful comments, even if they're to say that I'm fulla shit and that this is a stupid idea.

One more thing: My apologies to The Improver, the other nominee for this month. I think he's a great user, and is a great candidate for NotM. But I'm just taking this opportunity to address something that's been bothering me for a while about NotM. I am in no way trying to defer people from voting for Improver. ~Minitrue Sir SysRq! Talk! Sex! =/ GUNWotMRotMAotMVFHSKPEEINGHPBFF @ 18:30 Apr 26

Forum:ITT: 3 Day First-Edit Grace Period for NotM --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 18:32, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
Ah the first controversy in my Uncyclopedia life that I've been aware of, and I'm at the centre of it. I'm annoyed and frustrated, for obvious reasons: I could do something silly and pointless like going on strike against Uncyclopedia and the fairness of disqualification so late on, but what's the point? I'm bitter as well, even more so that the user who is now in first place felt it necessary to come to my talk page and feel he was the one who should break this news to me (since I've been away from the computer all day). And thank you (to the same user) kindly for observing my YesTimeTo title rule - yes I know that's unfair built up rage, but you can understand my annoyance. I've got plenty of reasons - which are clearly selfish - why I should not be disqualified. I'm not going to bring them into this, I'll stay out of the whole thing - and if a debate over this does start I think everyone nominated and therefore involved in this should abstain from arguing, too. If I am to be disqualified it's only fair to call the vote again, that's what you would do in any official vote or election (in Britain, at least, where I live) - but since this may prove complex it'll probably have to be forgone.
Also I do not appreciate pity votes on my VFH, thank you, I don't want the article in question to be featured - even if it's considered poor - because I didn't win something else. And while I know you were just trying to help, I don't appreciate being offered other awards just to make up for this. Awards should go to those who are most deserving.
A "noob" is something which is very difficult to define precisely for the purpose of these rules - for a lot of people being denied a full-blown official award (and what would almost certainly be their first award) would put them off Uncyclopedia - not that I've been put off this great site nor that I'm saying I'm particularly resilient. This has all come out of the blue and has been quite a shock but I suppose at least it's almost qualified my talk page for a second archive. I'll let the matter be discussed, debated or ignored as you wish. - 08:55 26 AprilSir FSt. (QotF BFF NotM) YTTETalk!Read!Sign!Whore!CMC!Pee!
To get the drama out of the way, I'll just say that I agree that it was out of line for Improver to be the one to come to your talk page. He should have just kept quiet and not said anything. But I don't want this to become about drama. This is for discussion of my alternative to a simple "Make it a two month requirement instead of one" rule. YTTE, I know you're frustrated. But don't let it get the better of you. Keep a level head and let's try to keep this drama free. ~Minitrue Sir SysRq! Talk! Sex! =/ GUNWotMRotMAotMVFHSKPEEINGHPBFF @ 20:11 Apr 26
I say for for your little proposal. --The Improver talkcontribs22:07, Apr 26 2008 (UTC)

Who made everyone who voted for Rcmurphy suspicious?[edit source]

I ask you, who? Because I voted for Rcmurphy and I'm a mamber. Then this guy called Thekillerfroggy comes around and makes every vote suspicious. I'm just a n00b but some people have been here for a long time. I'm voicing my opinion on this but I don't think it's fair to mark every vote as suspicious just because you want one person to win. That's not fair. Those people who voted have a fair right of doing so, he didn't get the award last month. Why not give it to him, why not I ask you? Do you guys have anything against rcmurphy? So why not? --¿Qua? es mi página de discusión, es lo que mi contribuiría 17:32, 19 May 2008 (UTC)

/me Snooze.... Just on the off chance that's a serious question... Look at his user page, and contributions. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 17:40, May 19
Hey, play nice MrN9000 Edit Conflicter! The reason was because Rcmurphy is an extremely experienced user, but is considered a big n00b as part of a sorta in-joke. I think he was nominated before the real n00b candidates came along and so everyone voted for him. However, if he won he'd be robbing the real n00bs of the award. Rcmurphy hardly needs another award. - 17:42 19 May Sir FSt. (QotF BFF NotM) YTTETalk!Read!Sign!Whore!CMC!Pee!
Yeah, what they said. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 20:06, 19 May 2008 (UTC)

February 2009[edit source]

This is a tough month. Sir SysRq (talk) 19:15, 11 February 2009 (UTC)

Seems easy enough to me..... --TPLN 22:06, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
That's funny. You're funny. Sir SysRq (talk) 23:25, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
But you know what isn't funny? Genital herpes. Genital herpes is a serious condition that affects 15% of all adults over the age of 21. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 23:38, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
Heheh. He said "Genital". Heh heh. --TPLN 23:39, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
But you know what is funny? Genital warts. Genital warts is a hilarious condition that affects 100% of all the mothers I have. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 00:16, 12 February 2009 (UTC)
If that's true, there's a good chance you have congenital warts. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 00:17, 12 February 2009 (UTC)
Try asking Orian about genital warts. Sir SysRq (talk) 02:52, 12 February 2009 (UTC)
Yeh. His are bad. It's more wart than genitals, though. - [07:39 12 February 2009] YYettie

EnKay[edit source]

Hey I've written nothing. Can I be Noob of the Month?xD --Enkay 06:36, 27 May 2009 (UTC)

Yes, and by "yes", I mean "no". Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 07:10, 27 May 2009 (UTC)

Verto[edit source]

  • Why can't he be nommed next month? Icons-flag-it.png Don 15px-AAN.jpg20px-Oberst.jpg Puttano cHeDDs 15px-Jenny_Spy_Revised_Again.jpg 19px-Leprechaun_army.jpg 15px-TMMAN.jpeg 20px-Missmurder.jpeg 15px-SCBBQGPOS.jpg User talk:CheddarBBQ 14:54,16June,2009
    Because he plagiarized. You don't get awards for doing that. There are plenty of other editors around good enough which don't go around copying other people's work and claiming it as their own. ~Jewriken.GIF 14:57, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
    There's still half a month to go though. If he does in fact make a turn-around and become a solid member by July, can he be nommed? Icons-flag-it.png Don 15px-AAN.jpg20px-Oberst.jpg Puttano cHeDDs 15px-Jenny_Spy_Revised_Again.jpg 19px-Leprechaun_army.jpg 15px-TMMAN.jpeg 20px-Missmurder.jpeg 15px-SCBBQGPOS.jpg User talk:CheddarBBQ 15:07,16June,2009
    No. Sorry. People normally get long bans or office rules for this kind of behavior. ~Jewriken.GIF 15:09, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
    Okay, I can accept that. Just trying to help out my adoptee as much as possible. Icons-flag-it.png Don 15px-AAN.jpg20px-Oberst.jpg Puttano cHeDDs 15px-Jenny_Spy_Revised_Again.jpg 19px-Leprechaun_army.jpg 15px-TMMAN.jpeg 20px-Missmurder.jpeg 15px-SCBBQGPOS.jpg User talk:CheddarBBQ 15:21,16June,2009
    That's fine, might want to explain to him why we take it so seriously. He doesn't seem to care that much. ~Jewriken.GIF 15:24, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
    Will do. Icons-flag-it.png Don 15px-AAN.jpg20px-Oberst.jpg Puttano cHeDDs 15px-Jenny_Spy_Revised_Again.jpg 19px-Leprechaun_army.jpg 15px-TMMAN.jpeg 20px-Missmurder.jpeg 15px-SCBBQGPOS.jpg User talk:CheddarBBQ 15:30,16June,2009

New users[edit source]

I'm generally not too involved with the award pages but here's are a few recent arrivals (with the exception of Funnybony and Mykell) to keep an eye on. MadMax 15:50, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

I like STParker. He had the gall to get rid of a few of my contributions to his article and I had the gall to let him get away with it! --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 18:29, 22 July 2009 (UTC)
I like Ironic Youth. He has a cool name. Icons-flag-it.png 17YEARSOFcHeDDaR 15px-SBQ3.JPG 18:35,22July,2009

Disqualified noms[edit source]

Move from the main page for cosmetic reasons. I didn't sign on the main page for exactly the same reason. Pup t 10:51, 6/08/2009

Siddhartha-Wolf (talk) – contribs (newdel)edit-countblock (remlist)all logsgroupscheckuser[edit source]

Score: Ineligible
Hang on, is he to old for this award? Looks like his first contribution was on 11:24, 28 June 2009. Hmm how many days is that? Dam this is a close one. MrN MrN9000SouthParksmall.jpg 14:19, Aug 2
At best he makes the limit, at worst he's a day or two too old. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:33, 2 August 2009 (UTC)
Eh, we really fnagled our way to get that grace period up there added, then subsequently promised we'd never fuck with the times again. If someone bothers to do the math and discovers he's a day over, I don't know what to say. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 15:36, 2 August 2009 (UTC)
The answer is simple--no one do the math. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:12, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
I did the math. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:16, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
The results are in, then? Who is the father? --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 04:28, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
Give me a moment, I like to build suspense. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:46, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
I'd say that's enough time. He's ineligible by a day. Had there been one less day in July... Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 17:28, 4 August 2009 (UTC)
Symbol for vote.svg For. I don't care if you put that scratchy S thingys over his name, 1 fucking day ppl! Srsly! Surely we can create a clause bending it? Besides all votes are currently going to someone who hasn't been a noob for like over a year Sir ACROLO KUNFPWAOTMFA •(SPAM) 06:30, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
We created the clause already. That's why the "±3" is up there next to the 30 days of eligibility. Had we not created the "clause", he would be ineligible by four days (this comment is just to prevent what I predict will be a further argument to expand/ignore it). Also, when rc wins NotM it's because there's nobody else that deserves it, he actually hasn't been a noob in a little over four years. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 06:38, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
Oh I get it now lol I am behind the times... So does that still make sid inelligable? Ill just leave my vote there and if vultures eat it then so be it Sir ACROLO KUNFPWAOTMFA •(SPAM) 06:48, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
Sorry about my confrontational tone above. If I recall correctly, we went through this over a little over a year ago, except it involved a particularly popular noob and a huge issue was raised over it. After the usual textual shouting matches over the forums, somebody, I think TKF, suggested expanding the eligibility period by three days. The suggestion was overwhelmingly supported, the ±(seriously, what the hell is that thing?)3 was added, and everybody went to get Fudgesicles. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 06:59, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
No worries at all, at least I know now for future reference :) Sir ACROLO KUNFPWAOTMFA •(SPAM) 07:07, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
It's a plus/minus. It's like the interrobang of mathematics. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 07:01, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
Oh, I thought it was an underlined plus. Until I tried to underline a plus, that is. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 07:04, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Keeping the discussion off the front page.[edit source]

Have to admit I'm getting a teensy bit annoyed at the time restriction stuff on NotM. I was close to disqualified for last month due to time frames (just managed to squeeze in) and Miley and Sid are disqualified this month (just outside in one instance and well outside but non-contributing in the other.) I'm in favour of the concept of keeping it down to the 30(symbol that I don't know the ascii code for so can't be buggered putting it in but means effectively "more or less")3 as it gives a clear-cut definition, but by the same token I think that it would take someone fairly tightassed to say that neither Miley or Sid are n00bs in the spirit of the award. I also wonder at the logic of this as there are people who come here from other parody/comedy wiki's and start writing frantically from day one, and yet there are others who are completely new to wiki formatting (and I include myself in this) who have to learn that at the same time as being creative, which adds a certain element of challenge to it. I'm not arguing that we should do away with this restriction, but I'm interested to know if I'm alone in my opinion here (and yes, this is an opinion only. I've just forgotten how to enclose it in the <opinion></opinion> tags.) Pup t 23:47, 7/08/2009

1th, NotM bears a terrible curse,
2rd, Forum:Noob eligibility requirements. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 23:58, 7 August 2009 (UTC)
Hardly a consensus 9 vs. 11. Also, what about wikipedia:ignore all rules? – Preceding unsigned comment added by An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays (talk • contribs)
Vote hasn't closed, but I'm happy to go with majority consensus, assuming that there is a clear consensus. Pup t 00:05, 8/08/2009
No clear consensus = status quo. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:22, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
I don't agree with that. Let's have a vote on it! Pup t 00:25, 8/08/2009
Symbol declined.svg Against. having a vote on it. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN13:57, 8 Aug

I'm citing Ignore All Rules. These two are good noobs, and WikiLawyering is preventing them from winning. -- sheer Ape (fart) (Riot Porn) 15:05, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

They're over the limit, which gives them an advantage over other noobs who came in more recently. This isn't wikilawyering, please see UN:WRITE, UN:SEATING, UN:CURTAINS, and UN:BIRCHBARK for greater understanding of what wikilawyering looks like. - T.L.B. Baloon.gif WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 16:37, Aug 8
What about UN:IGNOREALLLEDBALLOONS? -- sheer Ape (fart) (Riot Porn) 16:56, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
That balloon comment just went over my head Pup t 01:06, 9/08/2009
Um, TheLedBalloon -- sheer Ape (fart) (Riot Porn) 01:18, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
Um, Balloon = floaty thing in the sky = over my head. Pup t 01:36, 9/08/2009
http://instantrimshot.com/ - T.L.B. Baloon.gif WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:59, Aug 9
Rimshot.gif Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 03:09, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
Thank you, thank you... I'll be here until banned... Pup t 04:10, 9/08/2009
It's cool you'd even consider me! I joined and edited here for one day right before finals, and that was it for a while. I finished the school year, moved for the summer, etc. then came back about 2 1/2 weeks ago. So if you don't count that one day (June 9), I've only edited here since July 25. But I have edited on other wikis for a long time, so I'm a n00b here but not n00b to Wikis. So even if you didn't count that one day, I wouldn't really be a noob anyway. But thanks! :) Miley Spears 03:37, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
Woah, woah! Woah! We didn't ask for your life story, here. We asked if you could pass the ketchup. Jeez! Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 04:49, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
I think she's looking for a tip or something. Sig pic.PNG Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:55, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
Not for service like this! Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 05:57, 12 August 2009 (UTC)
Music to be a n00b by potr

Nominations[edit source]

I have a question. There are nominations... But in fact there is nothing mentioned what noobish they did. well, I think there should be written examples so those that doesn't know everything will know reason :P Polisz.jpgSir Ptok-BentonicznyPisz tutaj KUN 21:26, November 1, 2009 (UTC)

Click on the Special:Contributions tag. The reality is the n00bishness is due to the date of becoming a member. (Except Rcmurphy - he's just a n00b.) Pup
I hope you don't think that I will be checking his editions :P And well.. Whats going on with Rcmurphy? :P I also wanna know why you call him noob so much :P Polisz.jpgSir Ptok-BentonicznyPisz tutaj KUN 01:03, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
And what means 30+/- days of being member. members are people having accounts or I missed something and member is some kind of rank you get? Polisz.jpgSir Ptok-BentonicznyPisz tutaj KUN 01:16, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Members are people who have achieved the rank of MUN. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 01:19, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
You know when you got a username? That's when you became a member. So, in short, when you joined was when you joined. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 01:21, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Theoretically as I got my username here one and half months ago I can't be nominated for noob, right? Well, I'm surprised of that rule because in Polish uncyclopedia it's totally different... To nominate you need to be at least 30 days (or more), and you CAN nominate yourself and you cant vote for yourself :P Well... Cultural shock ;D Polisz.jpgSir Ptok-BentonicznyPisz tutaj KUN 01:36, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
I hate to point this out, but this isn't the Polish Uncyclopedia. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:03, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Chill, I didn't say they are better... Actually they are worse :P Polisz.jpgSir Ptok-BentonicznyPisz tutaj KUN 11:42, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
But Uncyclopedia is the worst, right? Please tell us it is. It's what we live for. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 16:06, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Personally, I think most of the articles on the English uncyclopedia are crap, and I haven't seen a single article on the Polish uncyclopedia that I thought was badly written. Of course that might be because I can't read Polish. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:42, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Their wiki is all jokes about how many of them it takes to do something. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 17:06, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Translated from Polish: "How many Americans does it take to tell a joke? Answer: One." Pup
The people I was going to nominate already got nominated by someone else. It's just so unfair! I was the previous NotM I should get to nominate, darnit! You people are all really, uh, poopy! There, I said it. Poopy! (I read somewhere that people who win NotM are supposed to be nice at first, then start acting like jerks. Am I doing it right?) King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  03:07, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
No. Winners of NotM are supposed to promptly disappear. It's "The NotM Curse"! Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 03:29, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Oh, darnit, I got it wrong. Well then. I'm off to, I don't know, take a trip, get my battery recharged, look for a job, start a war, fight for a lady, something. Goodbye! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:09, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
I don't know where you get this isane NOTM curse idea from anyway PuppyOnTheRadio
Oh, you and your fancy smancy templates. You expect people to be impressed? OK so I am impressed, but that's not the point. Besides that you misspelled "insane." Misspeller! Misspeller! Pffffft! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:45, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Also while you're misspelling I am fighting for a lass. Don't believe me? See here. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:48, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Hah! You're wrong! I misspelt asinine. Pup


And I never won Noob of the Month. Outrage! Where the Wild Colins Are - LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! 04:25, November 4, 2009 (UTC)

You should have done what I did. Come in right at the end of summer/winter break (depending upon hemisphere) when all the would-be noobs are going back to high school/college and don't have time to start anything new other than school. Also make sure your hours at work get cut way, way back because of the recession so you have lots of time to waste when you should be looking for more work because you're running out of money. Did you know you can make three meals out of one package of Top Ramen? Just add a little cardboard. It's filling, and full of fiber! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:52, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Top Ramen?! Elitist. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 05:29, November 4, 2009 (UTC)
Yep, I am. Also I only eat cardboard from the top of the box. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  05:40, November 4, 2009 (UTC)

I must win this! Consider this a statement of intent! Dannehvirus 03:41, January 5, 2010 (UTC)

Consider this advice not to say things like that. Also you don't yet qualify--see the project page (link above). King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:38, January 6, 2010 (UTC)
Hey, there's nothing wrong with having a little ambition. I wouldn't vote for him, though, because the vowel-to-consonant ratio on his userpage is simply too high. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 21:45, January 6, 2010 (UTC)
I don't know; I've got no ambition and Unc has given me awards because they felt sorry for me. I like doing the pity mode better because I am so pitiful. Notice how pitilessful that sounds? "You can vote for me if you really want to, but I won't because I'll never know if I won or not anyway as I'm hiding my head under a pillow for feeling worthless." Works every time. Except when it doesn't. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:55, January 6, 2010 (UTC)

Heh... Don't worry about me, you lot. I'll find an excellent idea for an article and win some kind of award, even if it isn't Noob of the Month. I'll make it happen. I don't need pity, or patronising either. Consider THIS advice not to underestimate me! Dannehvirus 03:03, January 7, 2010 (UTC)

That's terrible advice. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 03:39, January 7, 2010 (UTC)
Hey, there's nothing wrong with a weird, thinly-veiled threat. I'm still going to underestimate him, though, because he keeps announcing on the forums that he has no ideas for articles. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 00:20, January 8, 2010 (UTC)
Maybe his plan is to appear hopelessly incompetent so we all underestimate him. It won't work on me though, I don't believe in estimating. Exact measurements for life yo! -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN00:23, 8 Jan
Besides, if he's only pretending to be incompetent, he's managed to surround himself with actual incompetents. There's simply no way he'll amount to anything. It's like being the only smart guy in the Bush Administration. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 00:48, January 8, 2010 (UTC)
Before he does away with the site, though, it bit him on the ass once. He got caught in the -username- trick on the vote for ban page late last night, freaked out both on that site and on his talk page, and I talked him down while at the same time realizing that he will win many potatoes and other shiny objects. Aleister in Chains] July 4th, 1776

Is there like a list of all users who have joined in the last month?[edit source]

It would be very helpful. Like something based on time, that left them off the list after 31 days. So that we could see what noobs there actually were. It's Magically Fucking Delicious!!! It really is. 17:10,6February,2010

It's at Special:Log/newusers. That may not be exactly what you're saying, but it's very close. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  17:38, February 6, 2010 (UTC)
Also as a NotM has to have written a new article (or substantially rewritten an existing one), or made five cool images to qualify, you can check Special:RecentChanges. There's links at the top of that page for New pages and New images. Unfortunately, I don't believe there's one link that puts this all together, so you have to go through them yourself. If anyone knows of such a thing, please let us know. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  17:43, February 6, 2010 (UTC)
Have you tried Ban Patrol? Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 20:25, February 6, 2010 (UTC)

Happymonkey39's nom[edit source]

But i never used it...look at my history, i edited 1 or two articles and then left my account to die...*sniff sniff* This is all i have left...i can't be nominated for uncylopedian of the month...or can i? NOM ME OR ESLE...hehe nom me, nom nom...on second thought i don't have a shot against helpme but maybe the writer of the mounth!...ill shut up now. --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 15:19, July 15, 2010 (UTC)
HEY WAIT A SECOND! at the top it says 30 days except Rcmurphy, he had this award 2 years ago! Why is he so special, someone add my name up there! I mean cmon i have a good reason, i didn't use the account cause i was in the hospital...or not, but still i wasn't here so... --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 15:24, July 15, 2010 (UTC)
Rcmurphy as NOTM has been an injoke for a while. Changing the rule from 30 days to 30+3 days was enough of a stretch. A lot of people consider it unfair for cases like yours to be allowed to win, so they don't.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Thursday, 03:51, July 15 2010 UTC
Also, you have to be around a lot longer to be UOTM or WOTM...--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Thursday, 03:52, July 15 2010 UTC
You did quite a few edits in February, it just seemed like a few. But look on the bright side, you are actually no longer a noob! You are a veteran of the Uncy crew, a man about town, a guy the noobs have to get coffee for. And you are too much fun to be put off by this, let the noobs fight it out (and hopefully tie) and then laugh at their noobness. Only assholes win Notm, according to HELPME, so people like you, I, and HELPME don't want it anyway. Leave it to the others and wipe the dust of their noobness off your feet. Aleister 16:00 15 7
...you and HELPME have won NOTM. But i get you Aliester....ALIESTER! GIVE ME MY DAMN COOKIES! I WANT MY COOKIES BACK NOW! DON'T MAKE ME PULL OUT THE GUN AGAIN! --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 16:05, July 15, 2010 (UTC) --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 16:05, July 15, 2010 (UTC)
Eh, actually, the monkey has a point, in a way. I shouldn't qualify either, as I've been here a lot longer than him... since before there was a noob of the month thing, in fact. Just saying. Rather like him, I didn't actually do anything until last month, though. ~ Lyrithya sig daji.png Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20100715 - 16:07 (UTC)
Well thank you, but Aliester just conviced me that I really shouldn't get this award, give it to that Lord fellow, i didn't even know he was new. --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 16:09, July 15, 2010 (UTC)
What? I won it? Oh, yeah, forgot. Well, proves the point. Only assholes win it. But I use my award as a doorstop, and don't really make a big deal out of awards anyway, like other people do. Take them (like cookies) or leave them actually. But my point is, seriously, you are a very good writer, editor, and talk page player, so this is icing on someone else's cake. Ummmm, cake. Aleister few minutes later
Lyrithya is cutting it close, but is still eligible. Looking at Happymonkey's contribs, I see the problem. You made quite a few edits in January and February.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Thursday, 04:15, July 15 2010 UTC
Didn't Why have some sorta "spiritual noob" award for people who didn't win or were ineligible? —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 20:28, 15 July 2010 (UTC)
=D --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 01:26, July 16, 2010 (UTC)
Ah, here it is:

fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:06, 17 July 2010 (UTC)

Don't feel bad noob[edit source]

I didn't even know about NOTM until 3 or 4 months after I was here. It's probably the reason I refuse to write articles.  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  24 Jul 2010 ~ 00:43 (UTC)

Lyrithya's nom[edit source]

I've been watching everyone talk about this for days, wondering if s/he had a past history here, and all the time s/he's said so right on hir talk page! under the heading Dogs that need putting down. . .in other words, proof that this account is a sock listing the full article and other edits s/he wrote in July of 2009. Lord and others have told people about this, even copied hr history, and people kept voting. If it was the last day I'd vote for hir just because of this, watching it has been fun. One of the best new/old writers on the site, check out hir Fern and other pages. Aleister, Lyrithya fan 15:46 23 7
  • Hold on a second. I'm pretty sure the contributions from then were from an IP- does that still count? Or am I reading this wrong?--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Friday, 06:28, July 23 2010 UTC
I thought Lyrithya = Athyria ... MacManiasig.png MacManiasig-cheerios.png MacManiasig-holmes.png MacManiasig-starwars.png MacManiasig-firefly.png MacManiasig-pixar.png MacManiasig-oregon.png MacManiasig-lesmiz.png MacManiasig-doctor.png HalLogo.png Portal16px.png UncycLensFlare16px.pngDalek16px.png ChekhovSig.pngJapanSig.png Sir MacMania GUN[18:30 23 Jul 2010]
Again, on hir user page under the heading "Dogs that need putting down". S/he told everyone all along!!!! I love it. Aleister a minute later
One of you now kindly move this unnecessary discussion to the talk page otherwise I'll ban the lot of you. And your raccoon as well. ~Jewriken.GIF 18:35, July 23, 2010 (UTC)
Sorry. :( I just wanted you to respond, and everyone else to shut their mouths so this wouldn't turn into a big discussion.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Friday, 06:46, July 23 2010 UTC

Hi Lyrith. They finally read your user page, the bastards! And all of this hir and s/he, I'm pretty sure you're a woman or a really gay guy, but the feeling is a woman. But Paizuri and others have been saying he, so I've kept my opinion on that to myself. No use telling us either, since you can make up anything you want. This has been fun, and not only are you noob of the month in my heart but you're one of the really good newly active writers around here, for surtainly. Aleister 18:43 23 7

On top of reading the page, we did a proper checkuser to make sure no mistake is done. ~Jewriken.GIF 19:04, July 23, 2010 (UTC)
After all this, finally disqualified for the account that lasted two hours. And I didn't even have to do anything but write a crappy article a year ago. I love you guys. (No, that is not sarcasm. I find this hilarious.) ~ Do not question the madness. Apheori *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20100723 - 23:41 (UTC)
JUSTICE IS SERVED!...and see, I'm not the only one confused of your gender. --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 20:54, July 26, 2010 (UTC)
I take it this means you don't want to make out... *shifty eyes* ~ Do not question the madness. Apheori *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20100727 - 00:55 (UTC)
This is why i don't have a girlfriend...and after hearing about the plastic surgery of yours, im good. --Happymonkey39 LAZAR.gifWeegeeheadbobin.gifDomo kun dance1.gif Dah Meme Master 05:31, July 29, 2010 (UTC)
Plastic surgery? Plastic surgery?! I'll have you know there was no plastic involved... it was all firming and stretching. Well, besides the plastic wrap, but that was merest technicality. And resolution of complications... and, why, I almost do look like a lady now... *sigh*
Maybe you need a boyfriend. ~ Do not question the madness. Apheori *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20100730 - 03:43 (UTC)

I was winning![edit source]

Right up until I was invalidated. I was robbed I tell ya, robbed!

Ok, not really.

It's really just an honor to be nominated. I'll always have that. (Congrats to Tonillero.)  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  02 Oct 2010 ~ 02:10 (UTC)

Eh, you were doing rather funnily. If anyone was robbed, though, it was the guy who was invalidly nominated, invalidated, and then still received further invalid votes (especially since at least two of them voted twice)... ah, well. You made the other point fairly well, I'd say, anyhow, with that nomination... I really was going to do the same, but I chickened out. *siiiigh* Oh... okay, there's a wasp on my hand... er... crap, I forgot what I saying. ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101002 - 02:42 (UTC)
I love that guy! I think I may have even voted for him.  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  02 Oct 2010 ~ 02:48 (UTC)
I think I may have voted for him, too, actually... odd. Wait, did I seriously vote for three people? o__O ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101002 - 03:13 (UTC)
People? (Nobody knows you're a dog on the internet.)  Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!* Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~ Xkey280.jpg ~  02 Oct 2010 ~ 03:15 (UTC)
I figure anything sentient and capable of coherent communication is a person. Yes, that rules out quite a few humans. But it also allows for some rather odder things, which works just fine for me. Even dogs... or better yet, brooms pretending to be horses. o_O ~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101002 - 03:52 (UTC)

Nominations[edit source]

Can you nominate me for Noob of the Month sometime? Matthlock Talk to me! Soundgarden.jpg Follow the yellow-eyed eagle to see what I've done for Uncyclopedia Check me out on Wikipedia! Lionel Hutz.jpg India! Greed is - for lack of a better word - good 21:58, March 21, 2012 (UTC)

Only if you fix that broken motherfucker of a signature. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngWed, Mar 21 '12 22:27 (UTC)
People who ask for nominations..are banned for being nominated for a two year period. I'm sorry, but there are no exceptions. Not even the most powerful admin can undo the damage that you've brought upon yourself. We are sorry --ShabiDOO 23:44, March 21, 2012 (UTC)

Noob of the Moment???[edit source]

What happened to Noob of the Month (which is the award most of the listed people actually won)? King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  05:23, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

This. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 07:39, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

A minor edit[edit source]

I have changed the procedure ever so slightly to clear up confusion regarding when someone is presented the NOTM award. Currently someone gets to +5 then sits on the page until the end of the month when someone comes along and hands them the award and archives everything. All I have done is to lend this a little more clarity so it actually looks like we know what we are doing. From now on NOTM will be given out at the end of the month to all noobs with a score of 5 or over. This means that if a promising young noob reaches a score of +10 on the second day of the month they remain on the NOTM page until the end of the month when we will hand out the award, they are not given it immediately. The 30 day expiry will still work; if Rcmurphy is nominated on the 20th of the month and has only gotten 3 votes by the end of the month, they will carry over to the next month, remembering that a noob with a score of +5 will not be removed after the 30 day limit.

I have made this change partly because it's pretty much what was happening anyway and because it makes the archiving make more sense. I call this the Noob of the Monthment solution.

TL:DR version: The NOTM award will only be given out at the end of the month to any noob with a score of +5 at that time.

Thank you, we now return to our scheduled programmes. --ChiefjusticeGameCube 06:49, September 1, 2012 (UTC)

I think we should do this like the way the up to 62 days interest free on credit cards works, in that the interest doesn't get charged until 31 days after the statement date, and the statement date is when the statement is regularly printed out and sent to customers. Although keep in mind that credit card insurance is calculated based upon the balance of the account at the statement date, and that charges are based on a similar calculation. But the interest is different, so that the statement date, which we will nominally leave as the last date of the month, includes all purchases - er, votes - made over the statement period from the day following the printing of the last statement - which for practicality reasons is actually done on the day following the date nominated as the statement date, unless that is a weekend, in which case it falls to the next banking business day - are still considered interest free - or in this case, valid - up to the next statement date, which as we've already explained is not the actual date the statement is printed but the nominal date of statement printing. If of course, the votes still haven't been cleared off - in this case that would refer to the position being awarded to the n00b in question, then the interest is backdated to the date of purchase (or to stretch the metaphor, back to the date that the initial nomination was cast). Of course, nominations are not considered as completed transactions until the paperwork, which may be electronically submitted, making it paperless paperwork - is sent through from the merchant - in this case, the Uncyclopedian community - to the customer's - the noobs - own financial institution. Which as this doesn't fit into the metaphor easily we'll simply refer to it as when the first vote is cast. Also note that under international credit card law - which isn't actually a law as much as a code of conduct adhered to by the major credit card companies but does adhere to legal changes made by local governments - and by which we refer to federal governments, and not the local governments that you would usually think of as an adjunct to state and/or territory governments, assuming a three tier government system - that the individual credit card companies have to adhere to, the onus on verification of the validity of the transaction is on the merchant and not the customer or the merchant bank, customer's bank, or credit card companies. In which case a customer - read n00b - can later dispute the validity of the transaction. This of course needs to go through the n00b's own financial institution - or an admin - to back through to the credit card companies - or the community vote - through to the merchant bank - which following the Wikipedian style of RfC we can have this as an impartial admin who has refrained from being involved previously, and has had more than 12 months of experience as an admin - can go back through to the paperwork supplied paperlessly by the merchant - or in this case the original nominater - and verified by a representative of the original merchant - which in this case could be the original voter, which may or may not be the original nominater - to verify the verification of the validity of the voucher is valid. This process can take between 45 - 60 days to confirm.
TL;DR: If you blow an admin, you'll get it sooner. Nominally Humane! 07:19 01 Sep
POTR, I humbly suggest that you blow me first. --ChiefjusticeGameCube 07:21, September 1, 2012 (UTC)
Thanks for the offer, but that paragraph was enough of a mouthful for now. Nominally Humane! 07:25 01 Sep

Where do we vote?[edit source]

I'm not sure where to tell anybody or do anything, but I notice Frosty nommed me. Which makes sense. I got my account yeasterday, and I've already done some fabulous contributions. And also, I know that noobs can't nominate, but can they at least vote? Twinkleblue43 Call me up if you a gangsta 03:18, October 8, 2012 (UTC)

Yes. Click the 'edit' button next to the user's name, and add your vote with your signature and stuff.--Snippy 04:09, October 8, 2012 (UTC)

Huh?[edit source]

  1. Is there any difference between Noob of the Month and Noob of the Moment?
  2. Someone who has benn Noob of the Moment (like me) is considered a Commander of the Order? I read this here: Is Noob of the Month, is the writer of a Featured Article, is the artist of a Featured Image or is the winner of the Emmanuel Goldstein Award of Excellence in the Distribution of Misinformation

--Icons-flag-gr.png Sir SinnerSandbox (¿?) 17:31, October 21, 2012 (UTC)

Per an executive decision, Noob of the Month has been changed to Noob of the Moment. —qzekrom.net16.net clicky! 17:59, October 21, 2012 (UTC)
What about my second question?--Icons-flag-gr.png Sir SinnerSandbox (¿?) 23:18, October 21, 2012 (UTC)
If you've been Noob of the Moment, then you are a CUN. —qzekrom.net16.net clicky! 23:22, October 21, 2012 (UTC)

As Rommel used to say...[edit source]

...Tanks allot. Didn't know who to thank, or where, so this seemed like as good a place as any. I'm making a small circular waving motion with my hand, like the Pope. --Bill Melater (talk) 10:37, January 2, 2013 (UTC)

Excellent. The next step in the traditional Thanking of the Voters consists of (1) donning kneepads, (2) assuming the position, and (3) acting like you enjoy it. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngWed, Jan 2 '13 12:47 (UTC)
Oh shit, I have to get a prostate exam? Oh, well--Bill Melater (talk) 07:41, January 3, 2013 (UTC)
If that's what your doctor calls it, then yes, that's exactly it. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngThu, Jan 3 '13 8:32 (UTC)

No one new[edit source]

No one new to put here.  MagicBus 21:38, 18 November 2013 (UTC)

Thanks for letting us know. --Mimo&maxus 22:06, 18 November 2013 (UTC)
Let's nominate spambots. Anton (talk) 11:20, 24 November 2013 (UTC)
SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAM BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! --ShabiDOO 11:29, 24 November 2013 (UTC)

2017?[edit source]

This hasn't been updated for one whole year and two months! Why? -- MagicBus Can you ride my Magic Bus? 01:04, 13 July 2018 (UTC)