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jetpakturtle will work for food.

jetpakturtle is an uncyclopedian
jetpakturtle has a jetpack
jetpakturtle has a turtle
jetpakturtle cannot spell which is why he is jetpakturtle
jetpakturtle worships aimsplode
jetpakturtle likes c418
jetpakturtle likes adding links to asplode in its articles
jetpakturtle wrote the article on apple park
jetpakturtle wrote the article on redaction
jetpakturtle just realized that it wrote an article on ralph breaks the internet and it isn't even funny
jetpakturtle is an egotist for talking about itself so much