User:Zombiebaron/2010

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Congratulations to former Uncyclopedian Blind "Zombiebaron" McTell on being named the host of "How Gay Are You, Sir," showing Tuesday nights at midnight on HGTV.
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia 2010,

The home of creative wiki-based internet humor since 2005.
41,054 articles in English

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Today's featured article

175449-platinum-ingot.jpg

Platinum is an extremely expensive, yet highly ordinary metal. It is essentially one of over ninety silverly metals. Gold and Copper, the colorful ones, are the envy of Platinum to no end. Then why is it so expensive? Because Platinum is literally the most anti-social metal ever. It refuses to react with anything, even Halogens, and almost every single acid known to science can not even stain it. One thing that can react with it is Aqua Regia, meaning royal water. It is arrogantly so named because it can react with the kings of metals Gold and Platinum. Talk about ego!

Platinum is commonly used by people in high grade laboratory equipment and in jewelry for people who consider themselves too posh to use common gold jewelry. It can also be found residing in the Earth's crust at a concentration of roughly one part per billion. Platinum is the 78th element of the periodic table, it is derived from the Latin word "Platina" which literally means "Little silver", despite costing roughly 60 times more than silver. (Full article...)

Did you know...

When-i-grow-up.jpg
Air Force technologies.jpg
  • …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
  • ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores?
  • ... that the Uncyclopedia Discord link contains a virus called which infects your computer with the Uncyclopedia Discord?
  • ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
  • ... that the police are at your door?
  • ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
  • ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?
When-i-grow-up.jpg
Air Force technologies.jpg
  • …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
  • ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores?
  • ... that the Uncyclopedia Discord link contains a virus called which infects your computer with the Uncyclopedia Discord?
  • ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
  • ... that the police are at your door?
  • ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
  • ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?
When-i-grow-up.jpg
Air Force technologies.jpg
  • …that it’s offensive to call them “black pencils” and we should call them “pencils of colour isntead”?
  • ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores?
  • ... that the Uncyclopedia Discord link contains a virus called which infects your computer with the Uncyclopedia Discord?
  • ... that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
  • ... that the police are at your door?
  • ... that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
  • ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?
When-i-grow-up.jpg

In the news

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1977-2026

Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • ICE-y chaos in Minnesota • Fallout from the Epstein FilesWinter OlympicsSeattle flooding the streets with Starbucks coffee to celebrate the Seahawks' win • New England Patriots fans hiding in a corner after being exposed • r/TheDarnold having a MASSIVE field day

Recent deaths: Scott AdamsKianna UnderwoodUncyclopediaCatherine O'HaraLamontBrad ArnoldNFL season • New England Patriots fans' insufferability, for now • Lindsay Vonn's legSome kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny titleJames Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) (Pictured)

Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek)

Upcoming deaths: Donald TrumpNYC's economy • WeedDick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • Dancin' Maduro • Aaron Rodgers' career • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files (cough cough Bill and Hillary Clinton) • Travis Kelce • the US government, again

On this day...

Mmm crunchy.

February 15: It Just Got Out Of Hand Day

Today's featured picture

The Fifth Horseman
"Who's Afwaid of a Widdle Apokowips?"

Image credit: Modusoperandi
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Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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