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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Our Dear Leader has inspired us to work on 37,627 articles since opening in 1948. Before editing, please read the Manifesto and browse the Constitution. Korean Workers' Party | Military exercises | Military technology | Soldiers | Juche | Party line The Glory of Korea | ㅆ to ㅋ | Other...

Today's Party Column Snakes on a Plane is a 2006 high-concept action thriller film which also doubles as an Internet meme. Based on a relatively obscure Dr. Seuss book, the film highlights Samuel L. Jackson's desperate and heroic battle against some 200,000 poisonous snakes, all of which takes place on the titular plane. (It should be noted that every snake on the plane was non-venomous, and in real life, the flight would have ended with a few minor bites rather than gruesome death.) Snakes on a Plane was released to highly polarized opinions. Critics griped about its lack of a comprehensive plot, inaccuracies, and nonsensical mix of sex, drugs, gore, snakes, and planes. The Internet, on the other hand, loved it, and spouted Jackson's line "I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!" about fifty million times. (Full article...) Recently featured: Pikmin Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history April 12: Narcolepsy D....zzzzzz 30 AD - Jesus takes a nap. Apostles write their own parables while he's not aware. 124 BC - Forgetting to file his taxes on time, Prometheus uninvents fire in an attempt to delay the deadline, but the Sun foils his plans. 1945 - Orville Redenbacher begins work on The Manhattan Project. 1955 - February's Groundhog leaves hole (Pictured), Spring decides not to come at all this year, skips straight to Summer. 1961 - Yuri Gagarin flies into space, notices an unusual draft coming from his porthole window. 1967 - Che Guevara takes a nap and wakes up in a CIA prison in Bolivia. 1979 - Mel Gibson goes mad and eliminates a rogue biker gang. Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is desperation Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge (Pictured) NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig Climate activists ruin Jackson Pollock painting, no one notices Stalemate in Ukraine: Zelenskyy flees for greener pastures Steamboat Willie enters public domain, several Mickey Mouse horror films and games announced Santa's Elves on strike UnNews finally able to write obituaries for Shaft, Bull and Chandler Will Barbenheimer beat JigSaw in his own game? Ongoing: Russian Invasion · ABBA Recent deaths: Akira Toriyama · M. Emmet Walsh · Louis Gossett Jr. · Hype around the eclipse · O. J. Simpson Upcoming deaths: Kris Kristofferson · Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · The U.S. Federal Budget · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for White Broncos · God's curse on the Buffalo Bills (..maybe) Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes? You cannot deny... ... that you can fry a potato but not a potatoe, according to the Potato-tomato theorem? More wisdom
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Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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