User:Argo v8.2/1984 Front Page

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*... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?

In the news

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"...at least panda meat doesn't give you autism!" ‑RFK Jr.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Hollow Knight: Silksong, and Deltarune Chapter 3Eurovision Song ContestRussian InvasionIsrael‑Hamas conflict • ICE rounding up illegal immigrantsTaylor Swift's very unlucky, no good yearDOGE firings and budget cuts • Myanmar earthquakeTornadoes shredding the American South • Post-apocalyptic streaming movies starring Stranger Things actors • Disney fans re-watching the original Snow White to forget the remake

Recent deaths: SkypeKingda Ka • David Johansen, The New York Dolls, and Buster Poindexter • UnSpoiler and BeGone extensionsSpace GhostTesla's stock • Bob RiversMeghan Markle's Netflix show • The Electric State • Kurt from Good BurgerGeorge Foreman23andMeSnow Broke and the 9-figure loss for DisneyBruce GloverRichard ChamberlainRoger Daltrey's eyesight and hearingVal Kilmer

Upcoming deaths: Luigi MangioneYoon Suk Yeol's presidency and freedomKate MiddletonLaura PalmerDEI, for better or for worsePope Francis • Meghan Markle's remaining likeability • Your March Madness bracket and bank accountTornado Alley • Somebody from The Rugrats Movie

On this day...

The Rite of Spring, you had to read the alt text to get it didn't you

April 3: Vivaldi Appreciation Day

  • 1220 - Rampaging crusaders drive a trebuchet through the walls of two towers in Ancient Syria.
  • 1666 - Sir Marquis Baron Vivaldi walks to the crossroad and sells his soul to Satan
  • 1888 - Vivaldi composes new record "A Change of Four Seasons", inspired by regressive metal band Dream Theater.
  • 1945 - Scientists discover that if you play John Cage's 4'33" backward you'll hear someone cough, but backwards.
  • 1974 - Tornadoes sweep the U.S.A, inspiring the invention of the tumble drier.
  • 1986 - D.J. murder rate at all-time high, blamed on the provocative lyrics of The Smiths.
  • 1996 - Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber, is arrested for crimes against tasteful nomenclature, and killing like six people.


Colonization of the Week
For the glory of her majesty
Help us clear the ivy of crap,
and plant the seeds of humour.

Today's featured picture

Little Miss Psycho
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Image credit: Bonjo Nelson
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Writer and Noob of the Month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


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