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Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit. Sophia has inspired us to work on 41,340 articles since opening in January 2005. Before editing, please read the Beginner's Guide and browse the Big Five. Politics | Games | Computers | People | Quaint | Coherent Most Popular | Alphabetical Index | Other Categories...

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Today's Featured Article Stop, stop there my friend! You, my fine fellow, were born several years ago and now you are gay. gay gay gay I'm here to tell you that you're gay and you'd better get used to it. Er, what? No whining or going into a hissy fit. Although that is now infinitely more socially acceptable now that you are gay. Why have you handcuffed yourself to me? Ahahaha, I'm afraid you'll have to get used to things like that now, gay boy! And that also goes for you if you're not a boy. You're gay too – as a Christmas tree. A true friend of Dorothy. Don't pretend you aren't, don't fight it, get yourself right up here and pin your pink colours to the mincey mast aboard the good ship Rainbow, setting sail from closet harbour and out into the big wide world! (Full article...) Recently featured: Skittles Suicide note Oh My God! There's a Meteor Heading Towards Us Joe Rogan Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia edit Selected anniversaries August 7: Anniversary of the Day The Matrix Stopped Being Cool 2003 - An adolescent who, for no reason at all, starts mimicking the slow-motion bullet dodge from the first Matrix film on a bus, is appalled to discover that his fellow passengers are not immediately breaking out in applause and high-fives, as is usual whenever any reference to The Matrix is made by anyone at any time. 2004 - A suburban family, watching a toothpaste advertisement featuring characters in black leather doing kung-fu, lets out a bored sigh in complete unison. 2005 - A stand-up comedian, beginning a joke with the words "You take the blue pill", is booed off-stage and has his car tires slashed. 2006 - A man is kicked to death for saying "whoa" in a Keanu-esque fashion. 2008 - Robert Mugabe becomes 44th President of the USA, announces that the Matrix "is totally not cool" and that people caught watching it "will be shot." 2014 - The Matrix finally becomes cool again, for about three weeks until everyone gets to the third movie on their rewatch. 2021 - They make a fourth Matrix movie, under the mistaken belief some of the love for John Wick will rub off on the movie by association. Archived Anniversaries	edit In the news Seventh time lucky? Country you've never heard of changes name, not too different from old name Mr. Blobby burninates the whole of Europe Andy Murray becomes Pope of the United Kingdom (Pictured) HATSUNE MIKU IS SPANI— *ahem* I mean, Argentina loses to Spain at the 2026 FIFA World Cup Canada is on fire again The United States gives birth at 250 Giraffe marries hippo in Mamdanistan, at a ceremony attended by the Illuminati, officiated by Happy Gilmore. Insiders claim the upcoming divorce album will "be lit". I asked AI to write me an Uncyclopedia article: the results surprised me We asked current UFC champions what their favorite Mitski song is! Seattle, FIFA troll homosexuals and homophobes Europe repeatedly melts into pile of goo Deltarune Chapter 5 to be released IN 3 MOTHERFUCKING SECONDS!!! Wikipedia co-founder permanently blocked, unblocked, and then re-blocked from his own creation; hundreds of Wikipedia editors swarm to Uncyclopedia Starmer to force UnNews to prioritise BBC over the "disinformation" we apparently provide Ongoing: Argentina still refusing to accept defeat at the World Cup • Falklands War 2: Electric Boogaloo • Trump claiming victory in Iran... for like the 101st time or something • Chicago Bears moving to Indiana, keeping name? What? Recent deaths: That deaf girl from those Godzilla and Kong movies • Lettuce industry • Chuck Russell • Pussy Upcoming deaths: PlayStation • Iran • Dick Van Dyke • Bitch McTurtleface • Lionel Messi • Dr. Fauci More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons: ... that Canadian baseball (Pictured) is a thing? ... that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it? ... that I think you know what's happening today? ... that not all πr², there are also many π that r rounded? ... that many diseases can be prevented by washing your hands before eating, after eating, during eating, and another couple of times just in case? ... that two peanuts were walking down a street and one was a salted? ... that she ruined my career? ... that anyone who pronounces it "jif" is going to the 11th circle of hell? Read More
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,340 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Gen Alpha!: Uncyclopedia English United States 41,340 Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785 アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 19194 Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 17766 Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14423 Désencyclopédie Français France 8936 Inciclopedia Español Spain 12400 偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6417 Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 6330 Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Other Uncyclopedias 백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 6303 ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3132 Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 275 Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 105 伪基百科 汉语 China 8269 איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2187 קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 46 Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 6054 Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4563 Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 762 اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 976 نانشنامه فارسی Iran 943 ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 4 Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 1 Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9095 Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2497 Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 4 ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 8 আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 17 Φρικηπαίδεια Ελληνικά Greece 2812 Celwyddoniadur Cymraeg Wales 103 Scotypedia Scots Scotland 10 Frithchiclipéid Gaeilge Ireland 19 Kengencyclopedia Lëtzebuergesch Luxembourg 7 Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 456 Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27 Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303 Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 31 Википедија Македонски Macedonia 175 Oncyclopedia Nederlands Belgium and Holland 2807 Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 21 Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3530 Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1888 Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1731 Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 234 Neciclopedie Română Romania 167 Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 4 Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1117 Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4466 Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96 Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 159 Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 267 Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 3176 Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 14 Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 5009 Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 33 Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 279 Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar 8 Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel 7 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Complete list • Multilingual coordination • Requests for new languages

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