Babel:Falwell

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Welcome to Falwellapedia,

The official Encyclopedia of Liberty University.
40,187 articles in (American) English

Beginner's Guide · The Five Solas · Style · Questions · Help · Charity

Categories · Biblical Canon · A–Z index

Welcome to Falwellapedia

The literal and inerrant encyclopedia you can trust.
To get to heaven, you have to get past me, first.

Falwellapedia has over 10,000 educational, clean, and concise entries, including exactly 66 canonical texts. There have been over 11,600,000 page views and over 172,000 page edits, including 171,699 reversions of heretical edits.

Jerry's Daily Sermon:

"Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them." Crossfire (17 May 1997)

Daily Historical Falwell Quote:

"Han, Han. If only you hadn't had to dump that shipment of spice. I just can't make exceptions. Where would I be if every pilot who smuggled for me dumped their shipment at the first sign of an Imperial starship? It's not good business."

On Han Solo's loss of Jerry the Hutt's illegal cargo (Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Special Conservative Edition, 1997)

Please read our rules here, and how we differ from the too-liberal Conservapedia here.

FATTY1234567890.jpg

There you are - forty-one years old, single, on your way home from work. It's been a long day. It's a Monday, or a Wednesday, and you've got plenty more days left just like this one. So to cheer yourself up, you stop at the local candy shop. You make your selection carefully. Pear drops, rhubarb and custard, the lovely little chocolate mice - whatever you like. You spend the loose change in your pocket and feel good about yourself. You leave the shop, delve your hand in the bag, and then...

You see them. They're coming. Your oh-so-friendly neighbour and her oh-so-evil son. How old is he? He's got to be at least 3, right? Why the hell is he still in a pushchair? Probably too fat to walk. And then you realise...

Quick, you think. Hide the candy. You try to stuff it in your pockets, but it's too late. You've drawn attention to yourself. The mother smiles - pity she's got a boyfriend - but her fat baby has noticed the little white bag. "Hello," he thinks, "I'll have some of that." With time running out, you swing the bag behind your back, but the mother notices. And now she's stopped! This is getting out of hand! (Full article...)

Breaking News

"You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold, resurrected hands."

On this day...

How to Get Away with Murder: 1) Be rich. 2) Don't be poor.

June 12: Elephant Flossing Day

Featured picture

Uluru's Paintjob
Each year, Uluru's paint is refreshed to prepare for the upcoming tourist season.

Image credit: Hindleyite
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images


Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


BePrepared.png

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Noobaward.png

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,187 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Falwell!:
United Kingdom
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
40,187
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
50785
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
19194
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
Wikia 17766
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
Wikia 14423
Italy
France
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
Wikia 8936
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
Wikia 12400
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
6417
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
Wikia 6330
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7300
Finland
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.

Protected by Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior, and an elite clan of Baptists.