UnNews:Main Page opt3

UnNews Main Page

3 December Grover Cleveland pretty depressed after Trump takes his one cool thing South Korean President Yoon Suk Yeol accidentally declares martial law while ordering pizza Archives: December 2024 | Older Indigestions Refresh – add	Sarah Palin: 'Going Rouge' Hits Stores; Hints to Maverick Party ANCHORAGE, Alaska -- Sarah Palin begins her whirlwind tour of her newest book, fittingly titled Going Rouge. Sources tell that it was originally going to be called Story of an Average Maverick Hockey-Mom, but Palin refuted that title, calling it "anti-un-Americana." » Full story US briefly takes lead in war of religious insults ( listen) GAINESVILLE, Florida -- The United States briefly jumped ahead in the months-long battle between Muslims and Christians to give the other side gratuitous offense when Pastor Terry Jones designated next Saturday as the first "Burn a Koran Day." » Full story Tea Party supporters oppose plans to display severed heads of 9/11 victims at Ground Zero GROUND ZERO, New York City -- Supporters of the Tea Party movement have demonstrated in opposition to plans to "display the severed heads of 9/11 victims on spikes at Ground Zero." Supporters of the proposal, however, accuse opponents of being "misleading" and "hysterical." » Full story	From the Chief • Audio • Podcast • Goldstein Award • Foolitzer Prize • Ask Cthulhu • Ask Hal 9000 • Tech Support Write a new UnNews story: Type your desired headline and then click on the button. Read Me First | Style Guide | Newsroom Stories with Audio President Partons turkey UnNews remembers Phil Spector Strait Country is Rolling Stone's Gayest Album of All Time Tips to avoid the coronavirus North Korea to separate onto their own island Something might happen tomorrow » More | Podcast Horoscope for This Month Week of the: Sagittarius Read this month's predictions UnFunnies for December 8 (show)

PoliticsMore American base at South Pole accused of flying US flag upside-down Scooby-Doo Named Acting Director of Division of Enforcement Toilet paper scarcity in Germany Biggest WTO meeting ever held Boney M removes Neil Young cover from Spotify Governor Cuomo is screwed Christina Chandler announces her candidacy Russia declares Venus as a Russian Planet If Joe Biden isn't a creep, then he isn't a creep! U.S. warns Gerard Depardieu: Stay out of our elections Yang "a coronavirus carrier," says Trump Internet forum contributor lauded for insightful commentary	TechnologyMore 500 gigabytes of hentai found inside of Tesla's "Full Self Driving" source code Scorsese discovers Britney Spears Email song NASA fixes supercomputer by turning it off and then back on Tiktok's scientists train users to "scroll down" National dogeday ensues, Dogecoin price is pumping, everyone is rich Trolling AI "indistinguishable" from humans Lordy, there are tapes! Holiday shopping preview 2017 We need to talk about net neutrality New Amazon gadget may be last device you will ever need if you can figure out what it does Hasta la Vista, baby! Windows 7 predecessor terminated CNN becomes first TV network to broadcast in low definition	EntertainmentMore Stephen Root warns character actors of impending doom: "You're not safe either, Malcolm McDowell" If you don't watch this movie, we will do something Pleakley to Have Sex with Men in Exchange for Money New "Weird Al" album to be executively produced by an infant baby Richard Hammond joins One Direction Cliff Richard abuse allegations investigated by police Mick Jagger: Van Halen are wrinkly old men trying to relive their youth Scale Everest: Now’s your chance! Lindsay Lohan creamed in Liz Taylor portrayal Wii U on indefinite hold Population of men who identify as gay up nearly 200% in month following leak of Snooki nudes Editorial - Why SOPA and PIPA are good ideas	Original reportingMore Grover Cleveland pretty depressed after Trump takes his one cool thing KKK grand wizard woke up from a terrible dream last night 10-year old math prodigy just realized Santa can't eat all those cookies OH MY GOD WHAT THE FREAK Trump just won, so here's a special HowTo about dealing with the hard times that are coming NFL player Sam Darnold emerges from election anarchy, crowned GEQBUS Peter gets dementia to stop stupid cutaways on next week's Family Guy Springfield infant arrested for second Trump shooting Biden shits himself! Lon Chaney endorses Kamala Harris Kamala Harris announces shark as running mate Jim Cantore going to Florida
On This Day December 8, 2023 December 8, 2022 Ireland Eases Disco Dancing Restrictions	ReligionMore Toast seen in face of Jesus Billy Graham dies at 99: What other obits aren't telling you America setting up for a coup by Satanists, Angel says Apple plans electric religion Bats are eating my legs! Controversial gay admits to Christian feelings Conversion therapy leader admits to male practice; closes facility After 598 years, Catholic Church admits wrongdoings Low-ranking Syrian terrorist defects from NATO Did the Time Warp wreck Canadian's Pope chances? The new looks sweeping the Muslim world Obama forgets sister's holiday	HealthMore Countries Unveil Breakfast Cereal Plan Australia names Mike Gibbons as October's 'National Fart Month' 2023 Ambassador. 'Sunday Papers Podcast' Host Greg Fitzsimmons' Sex Tape Becomes Highest-Rated Film in India Latest Narcissism Wave Grips Los Angeles County, Women Urged to Stay Low for Now Hundreds of Patients Stuck in Oregon Hospital Beds California officials declare Elon Musk's ego essential UnNews Quarantine Guide 2020 The Who unveils plan to lower insulin prices Yang "a coronavirus carrier," says Trump Rush Limbaugh accidentaly ties wrong part of brain behind back, goes into cardiac arrest All 'girls' in sex chat room actually girls Man fighting for life after eating an entire Mickey D's Dinner Box	CrimeMore British Peace Officers to be Armed with Fortnite Shock Hammers. Scooby-Doo Robbed at Gunpoint in London Mr. Krabs tax returns released Police seize $37 billion cash in Federal Reserve Bank raid Nixon admits 'I am a crook. No wait.' Mueller turns in report You're in big trouble, mister Enough is enough Lordy, there are tapes! GOP ends House Russia probe; Veselnitskaya admits to being Russian spy Bill Cosby found guilty of every crime FBI raids Trump lawyer Michael Cohen
UnMagazine	Headlines (Add) Click a headline to make a story! Working class rocker Bruce Springsteen is a billionaire Roman gladiator escapes from tomb, goes on zombie rampage Scrappy Doo, Barney Rubble biographies published Real Timothee Chalamet at Chalamet lookalike contest actually Finn Wolfhard This machine is a fascist	Uncyclopedia is made possible through contributions from readers like you. All donations go toward the continuation of Uncyclopedia and its community of volunteer editors. If Uncyclopedia has ever made you laugh then we invite you to donate and help us pay for our expensive server(s). You can make all donations using your PayPal account or debit/credit card here. You can also support your local Uncyclopedia by purchasing merchandise from our merchandise store where 15% of all sales goes toward Uncyclopedia. If you cannot donate but still want to help Uncyclopedia monetarily, you can click some of the ads in our e-store to help us keep the rest of the site ad free.

Got something to say? Request an interview with the UnNews community Got news and no computer? Call the UnNews Hotline +1-900-867-5309 (toll-free* in the U.S. only, ask for Jenny [*may not actually be free]) +1-234-567-8910 (outside the U.S. - long distance) +44-(0)7758-913637 (U.K. / Europe) real number! If you have news, and a computer, and can't figure out how to work this page, try Clicking Here Latest news reports: Refresh to see the latest news! if you find a broken, true, or rubbish article, fix it.

Saturday an 11% chance of nuclear war Tuesday a 27% chance of happiness Tuesday an 11% chance of idiocy Suggested Recreation While there is a 57% chance of hail Tomorrow, we suggest running about in the buff.

Global Warming Indicator Global Warming Indicator International Posts Special Weather Report: A pack of wild hurricanes were reported to be cited with public intoxication and slamming into continents without a license. UnWeather Station Forecast Stats Statistically, this forecast makes more sense than some countries' foreign policy.

About UnNews An Uncyclomedia project We are a group of semi-sentient beings whose mission is to build a website with present, up-to-date, relevant, newsworthy and entertaining content without a shred of truth. All content is released under a free license. By making our content perpetually available for free redistribution and abuse, we hope to line the birdcages of people everywhere. UnNews also aims to write stories from a borg point of view. UnNews needs you! We want to create a diverse community where proles from around the globe can collaborate to report the news lies on a wide variety of events that never happened. If you would like to write, publish or edit articles, visit the Workspace and read the Introduction to UnNews. UnNews English InciNoticias Español UnNews Deutsch OnNieuws Nederlands NonNews Polski Desnotícias Português Nonnotizie Italiano Hikinews Suomi 偽基新聞 ‪正體中文 백괴뉴스 한국어 dÉsinformation Français Psyknyheter Svenska Ikkenytt Norsk バ科ニュース 日本語 ไร้ข่าว ไทย איןחדש עברית 伪基新闻 简体中文 UncikloNews Magyar YanHaber Türkçe PekeBalita Tagalog

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia. UnNews News on crack Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia Undictionary Best left unsaid UnTunes Noisy things UnGames Ways to waste away HowTo Like Ikea without the pictures UnBooks Content-free books Unquotable Useless misquotes Uncycloversity No student loans UnPoetia Dreams deferred UnDebate Debate the irrelevant UnScripts We ruin stage too Why? Because UnReviews Hack frauds UnVoyage Armchair travel Uncyclomedia The Foundation