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| North Pole elves go on strike | 01:02, 21 January 2024 |
| The Pope Finally Came! | 09:42, 18 December 2023 |
| Harmonix Worse Than Big Tobacco | 09:41, 18 December 2023 |
| EA Games partners with Reebok | 09:40, 18 December 2023 |
| Trump presidency just a dream, George W. Bush still president | 13:50, 8 December 2023 |
| Was 9/11 an outside job? | 05:26, 23 November 2023 |
| My balls itch | 08:11, 15 November 2023 |
| Scientists: Shape of hot dog should be changed because current shape is a choking hazard; Seriously though, your whore mother is dead | 15:06, 12 November 2023 |
| Dave Mustaine is running for president | 06:27, 19 October 2023 |
| Today's music is so horrible, I need to go to counseling | 11:19, 16 October 2023 |
| Ugly Child Abducted, Quickly Returned | 17:11, 29 September 2023 |
| Meet the voice behind Omnitrans | 16:19, 28 September 2023 |
| Donald Trump facing impeachment after GOP is assaulted by barrage of stonefruit in House of Representatives | 07:40, 15 September 2023 |
| Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! | 01:20, 15 September 2023 |
| Jesus returns from grave, traded to Jets | 13:50, 8 September 2023 |
| Abott tells surf lesson refugees 'I support smuggling budgies, not people' | 10:21, 8 September 2023 |
| Giant mutant jellyfish sighted off Tahiti | 10:19, 8 September 2023 |
| President pardons furries | 16:32, 4 September 2023 |
| Thursday is a dirty whore | 10:08, 4 September 2023 |
| Local grandfather won't just accept alien overlords | 19:20, 2 September 2023 |
| Classic style guide | 13:37, 22 August 2023 |
| Cypress Hill changes its name to Sigh | 07:26, 15 August 2023 |
| Haggard feels "fabulous!" | 11:46, 10 August 2023 |
| Scab workers hired on to produce content for UnNews | 12:35, 26 July 2023 |
| January 6, 2021 | 23:12, 21 July 2023 |
| US to fight robot uprising | 12:40, 14 July 2023 |
| Trump: "Iran will have a nuke by 2167!" | 12:36, 14 July 2023 |
| Trump tweets "Impeach the pres" | 12:34, 14 July 2023 |
| Trump does something stupid yet again | 12:28, 14 July 2023 |
| Trump demands to see all votes, Obama's passport, and US constitution | 12:27, 14 July 2023 |
| The Anticlaus has arrived | 12:23, 14 July 2023 |
| In response to Charlottesville incident | 12:12, 14 July 2023 |
| Endless whining about Trump grows so much, tilt of earth has changed to 24 degrees say NASA | 12:08, 14 July 2023 |
| 2020 refuses to concede, vows to continue one more year | 12:01, 14 July 2023 |
| Chevy Chase, Maryland, to change name to Bill Murray | 18:46, 7 July 2023 |
| Earth gains on Mars for sandiest planet | 21:26, 30 June 2023 |
| Heaven under coronavirus quarantine | 19:13, 26 June 2023 |
| A-bombs dropped on Japan awarded Nobel Peace Prize | 22:40, 13 June 2023 |
| CDC recommends eating boogers to curb coronavirus | 23:04, 8 April 2023 |
| Man's nipples fall right off | 01:51, 7 April 2023 |
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