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| Russian Space Chief Announces Operation Ass Monkey | 23:32, 4 February 2026 |
| Pope appoints first non-human Primate | 17:20, 28 January 2026 |
| Pope calls out Stephen Hawking | 01:29, 16 January 2026 |
| Scientists reveal chicken came before egg | 01:24, 16 January 2026 |
| Scientists build thought-controlled wheelchair | 01:23, 16 January 2026 |
| Leading scientists declare global warming associated with Menopause | 01:06, 16 January 2026 |
| I Am Built Like a 'Horse' Claims Italian Prime Minister | 12:57, 14 January 2026 |
| New penis developer 'a success' | 12:49, 14 January 2026 |
| Increased sunspot activity cause for concern at Vatican | 16:18, 11 January 2026 |
| Praying pilot jailed | 15:05, 11 January 2026 |
| Former Primate of Utrecht Thomas Gibbon resigns in disgrace | 01:32, 9 January 2026 |
| Papal proclamation to procure profit for prophet | 01:22, 9 January 2026 |
| Believers see Holy Father in flames | 08:58, 8 January 2026 |
| After 598 years, Catholic Church admits wrongdoings | 05:09, 8 December 2025 |
| Satanic front group convenes in Vienna | 04:37, 8 December 2025 |
| Leader of Ireland's Catholics says God is 'ok with kiddy fiddling' | 04:08, 8 December 2025 |
| Russia’s new humanoid robot faceplants on stage | 02:05, 15 November 2025 |
| PM promises more satisfying narratives for road congestion | 23:37, 30 July 2025 |
| Random Outcry as Young Boy Sneezes On David Cameron | 23:31, 30 July 2025 |
| New Pope Alert! | 18:17, 22 May 2025 |
| Pope Francis is dead | 23:06, 8 May 2025 |
| Spain and Portugal go dark | 05:05, 30 April 2025 |
| Greece destabilises Europe | 08:05, 5 February 2025 |
| Celtic F.C. sign youth player in transfer mix-up | 23:28, 27 January 2025 |
| Britain is on Fire | 00:56, 14 January 2025 |
| Tommy Wiseau making film on cocaine sharks | 21:40, 13 August 2024 |
| Brits get their ass kicked | 12:19, 22 July 2024 |
| Biden apologizes for forgetting about Ukraine | 22:21, 7 June 2024 |
| Lexicographer's call for suspension of English Language | 01:58, 16 June 2023 |
| Vatican City coup: Cardinal strung up from Sistine Chapel "distraught but alive" | 17:33, 12 June 2023 |
| Kevin Sama not guilty of his warcrimes! | 12:36, 28 April 2023 |
| Seventeen baseball players arrested in Poland; Cubans are shocked | 14:55, 24 October 2022 |
| Russell Brand offends some Spaniard | 14:50, 24 October 2022 |
| Russell Brand in the running for Pope job | 14:50, 24 October 2022 |
| Polish Language Council's orthographic fail | 14:39, 24 October 2022 |
| Interview with an amateur abortionist | 06:14, 24 October 2022 |
| International Olympic Committee strips former female American Olympic athlete of medals, dignity, .... and clothing?! | 06:13, 24 October 2022 |
| Icarus International Airlines to resume flying | 06:10, 24 October 2022 |
| Guy Fawkes's euro account to be 'stressed tested' today | 05:59, 24 October 2022 |
| Godless Europeans blast US technological dominance | 05:55, 24 October 2022 |
| Geordie horse wants rematch | 05:51, 24 October 2022 |
| French caliph reveals shocking truth about wife | 05:48, 24 October 2022 |
| Former Australian President Kurt Waldheim dies | 05:46, 24 October 2022 |
| FARK YOU America and Europe, you're ALL faggots! | 05:42, 24 October 2022 |
| FaceBook comments arrest terrifies trolls | 05:40, 24 October 2022 |
| Errata 4 February 2008 | 05:37, 24 October 2022 |
| Entire UK population asks itself why it did nothing about Savile despite hearing the rumours | 05:37, 24 October 2022 |
| Drunk guy experiments with booty tweets | 05:31, 24 October 2022 |
| Bananas intercepted; Apes charged with smuggling | 04:44, 24 October 2022 |
| Cheese addicts go crazy in English sun | 20:30, 11 September 2021 |
