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The short-lived UnNews TV channel ran afoul of broadcasting standards.

Welcome to the Newsroom!

UnNews is a parody of WikiNews. The content is up to you, but below you will find some suggestions about formatting, and some tips and stuff.

Write a Headline[edit]

Short and sweet. If possible, your headline should fit on a single line in the daily list of stories on the UnNews front page.

You could try one out right now.

Add a picture[edit]

This is too small and those are too big.

At least one picture should be in your article. Experiment with the size - pictures which are too big or too small are no fun.

You either have to find a picture on here that someone has uploaded already, or upload one by clicking on "Upload File" on the side bar (or clicking here if you're a lazy fuck: Special:Upload).

Once in the story, the default template looks like this.

[[Image:Name of your image.jpg|thumb|left|Type a '''funny''' caption here.]]

Things you can do:

  • To change the picture size, put the number of pixels you want, followed by px, followed by a pipe. So, 400px| if you want to make the picture 400px.

[[Image:Name of your image.jpg|thumb|400px|Type a '''funny''' caption here.]]

  • Align the picture however you want using right| center| etc

[[Image:Name of your image.jpg|thumb|400px|right|Type a '''funny''' caption here.]]

  • Delete thumb| if you want it to function just like a picture. This will mean, however, that the text of your article does not wrap properly. It also means you cannot have a caption.

[[Image:Name of your image.jpg|Type a '''funny''' caption here.]]

A picture really is worth 1,000 words. Unless it's a picture of your mother, in which case it's not worth enough to buy a Coke with.

There's probably some other stuff too, but you don't want to mess around too much with the format.

Or a video[edit]

Videos from Youtube can be jammed into stories. Some editors don't like it, because it looks a bit ugly, but hey, some people probably don't like you because you're a bit ugly.

Anyway, the code is simple.


So, if the address is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R-1-62TcN70 copy the part of the address that comes after v=

Like so: <youtube>R-1-62TcN70</youtube>

This displays the video like this. Note that it's pretty big, nothing can go alongside it, and no caption is possible.

One of Britain's most important hospital dramas.

Another possibility is using this long-ass code, which has the advantage of putting the video in a thumbnail on the right of the page.

<div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner"><youtube>PASTE_LAST_BIT_OF_ADDRESS_HERE</youtube><div class="thumbcaption">PUT_YOUR_FUNNY_CAPTION_HERE.</div></div></div>

So here, using that same address, the code would be:

<div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner"><youtube>R-1-62TcN70</youtube><div class="thumbcaption">One of Britain's most important hospital dramas.</div></div></div>

This displays the video as you see it on the right. Still pretty large, but now the text wraps and the video can be captioned.

Cite sources[edit]

Sources are great to link readers to the original story - and bear in mind some readers will have no idea what you are talking about if you don't include one. There is a template at the bottom of all new UnNewses.

url= web address of the real news
title= article's title
author= article's author(s)
pub= website name (CNN, MSN, BBC, etc.)
date= date the article was published

Add categories[edit]

It is also nice to add categories at the end, to link your new page with other pages. You could, for example, use a category to indicate what nation is the setting, such as [[Category:United States]]. Categories can also indicate the general field of interest, such as [[Category:Politics]]. You can see a complete list of categories in Category:Categories.

Get stories in that sexy "In the News" section on the first page[edit]

Edit this page here. More complex is making your article one of the five "lead articles".

Control the stars[edit]

Edit the sneak preview here, and the full page here. Do not confuse the order of the star signs. We have a hell of a lot of intense, obsessive whoroscopers here.

Use UnNews Audio[edit]

How to listen[edit]

You will find the mp3s embedded in the stories in Flash players. You simply have to enable Flash to work on the site. They look something like this:

If you want to pore over links to recent audio recordings you can find an archive at this lovely place here.

As well as the archive, you can find new stories at the UnNews Audio bit at the bottom right hand corner of the UnNews mainpage.

If you're more of a doer than a listener, read on for a guide on how to upload your own audio!

How to author[edit]

  • Create an mp3 file on your computer machine.
  • Upload your recording as you would any other file, under 'Upload file'.
  • When you have updated your file, you should see a screen like this. Click on the link under the white square (here, UnNews--South.mp3).


  • A second screen, like this, will appear. Copy the URL.


How to add the audio to your story[edit]

  • Edit your story and add the following template as the first line.


  • Edit the areas in bold. Paste your url, making sure it starts with "images." - and not with http://
  • Write what you like for the message. Whatever is in your heart.


Let's continue with the UnNews--South.mp3 from the screen shot above. Here is what we want to add:

URL: images.uncyclomedia.co/uncyclopedia/en/1/14/UnNews--South.mp3

Message: Interview with Marios Charalambous

The code to display it, therefore, looks like this:

{{UnNews Audio|file=images.uncyclomedia.co/uncyclopedia/en/1/14/UnNews--South.mp3|title=Interview with Marios Charalambous}}

That's it. Good luck and God bless.

Who can I talk to?[edit]

On any newspage, click history and you will find out the author! You then have a 30-70 chance of having a pleasant conversation! Alternatively, push your eyes a little further down to see a list of recent contributors to UnNews.

Icons-flag-gb.png Leverage Foolitzer.png
Icons-flag-us.png Kip the Dip Foolitzer.png
Icons-flag-gb.png Banzaikitten
Icons-flag-us.png PF4Eva
Icons-flag-ir.png Dexter
Icons-flag-il.png Kakun