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The official Uncyclopedia page for the official Staind Instagram account, Staind.

There is no official Instagram account for the American heavy metal band, Staind. Staind's frontman, Aaron Lewis, who recently said that Staind will never tour again, DOES have an Instagram account. Still, Staind's Instagram account has its own official Uncyclopedia page. Just in case Aaron decides to create an Instagram profile for his band. There aren't plenty of official pages for things that don't exist. This is one of them, we hope you enjoy it.

Staind Instawatch, Part I[edit]

Today, the Staind Instagram account still didn't exist. It reminded me of the single "Just Go", the best song from Staind's first album, which was absent from the band's Greatest Hits album. Another song, which is called "Layne" and is probably Staind's signature song, wasn't included in the Greatest Hits too. This was just annoying.

Part II[edit]

Speaking of annoying, why isn't Staind touring anymore? Can't they just do it less, instead of stopping it altogether? Didn't you ever hear about "Less is More", Aaron? For example, you don't even have to take silly photos and upload them to Instagram, during and around the shows. You don't even have to THINK about it. Because Staind does not have an Instagram. You can also do a show once a month. How hard is that, man?

Part III[edit]

So we agree that there should NOT be a Staind Instagram account. Ever. And Staind should do a show once a month. And drop the official tours bullshit, man. You can do a show whenever you like and just put signs and posters on the streets. People will come. I mean, it's fucking Staind, man. The whole universe is one big Staind tour, if you ask me. And the world is Aaron Lewis's head. Seriously. People used to be SURE that the world is flat. Then, when Staind stopped touring, everyone were SURE that their flat is the world. Wanna know what they will be SURE of next?

Just watch the "Outside" video.

Part IV[edit]

I didn't listen to Staind's last 2 albums. The honest truth is, I didn't want to spoil the stuff I've heard on the album Chapter V from 2005. It was too fucking good. I NEED to see a Staind show, man. They never came to my country. I hope they do it soon. Some people don't come to my country because they are afraid, like Lionel Messi and Lorde. The others don't come here because they think Israel should be banned from Earth. Since it is impossible to ban Israel from Earth, most of the musicians end up overcoming their fears and doing a show in Israel. The fact is, there is less chance to die in Israel than to be banned from Staind's official Instagram.


Everything changes, Aaron. Come to Israel and start Staind again. We could conquer the world, man.

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