Worst 100 Creatures To Have Sex With

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Worst 100 Creatures To Have Sex With
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Contents:  100-91  90-81  80-71  70-61  60-51  50-41  40-31  30-21  20-11  10-1

The top Worst 100 Creatures To Have Sex With in all kinds (i.e|Oral, anal, etc.). There are important reasons not to have sex with these creatures, and some are too horrible to explain. It all happened one day when a friend of mine experimented by having sex with different creatures. Since that tragic incident on, I listed the most important creatures not to have sex with (just have it with a horse if you can't make it with a lady).

You may want to use precautions when having sex with any of the following creatures:

100-91[edit | edit source]

100.Dragon: Though, considering how large they are, they can still rip off your genitals.
99.Dinosaur: Very similar to dragons, except older!
98.Wooly mammoth: If you're lucky enough to get through all that hair without getting squashed.
97.Balloon Animals: Ever seen a fully-expanded balloon boner?
96.Skunk: Filth be upon you for thee who hump thy noble skunk.
94.Wild ass: They shit all over you.
93.Raptors with chainsaws: It is written... Only Leatherface can hump these things.
92.Humpback whale: A creature with a name that makes it a way too obvious subject.
91.1.Osama Bin Laden: Luckily he's dead... Or IS HE?

90-81[edit | edit source]

89.Flea: Try humping it without squashing it.
87.Zombie Ladies: If you did, congratulations! You got AIDS, and you are going to give birth to a corpse.
84.American: all of them are overweight and/or stupid.
83.Elmo: How do you procreate with a puppet anyways?
82.Yourself: If you are flexible enough.
81.Pinkie Pie: She might "cupcake" you out.
Do not believe. She's a psychopath (Or a cannibal).

80-71[edit | edit source]

80.pikachu:you will be shocked.
79.Twilight Sparkle: She will horn drill you.
78.Camper: You know the reason why they roast weinies on a stick? Because your's came along.
76.Black hole: If you did get your cock in there, you may never see it again!
75.Sunni Daze: That horrifying prick.
73.Kangaroo: You will suffer excruciating pain from an epic crotch-kick.
71.Any girl who watches Twilight: Anyone who makes out of them turned into a mother.

70-61[edit | edit source]

70.Your Dad: Way worse than 72.
69.Narwhal: Unless you want a dick kebab.
68.Anteater: Do you really feel safe being naked near a creature with a tongue like that!?
66.6.Antichrist: Just think about it.
65.Squidward: He has a dick for a nose. Why else do you think he doesn't wear pants?
64.Electric eel: You may need a rubber condom, or a penis made of silicon.
63.Griffins: I'm not procreating with those lion-bird things!
62.Peter Griffin: I take it back!
61.Zeus: Reason why Kratos wants revenge.

60-51[edit | edit source]

60.Grue: How can a man have sex with that?
59.a three-year old: Pedo, much?
58.Sarah Palin: NO.
57.Death: Once touched, never live again, even if it's a virgin.
56.Chief Man Who Dreams Of Sky: He's busy. Probably praying to his magical sky daddy.
55.Bigfoot: Why make love with a big hairy monkey thing that doesn't exist?
54.Doctor Octagonapus: BLAAAAAAARRRGGHHH!
53.Mickey Mouse: Disney-style sex with a talking animal. Need I say more?
52.Cock: Although it's named after "Cock", it will surely give you bird flu.
51.Your son: What Zeus does often to Kratos.

50-41[edit | edit source]

50.Athena: "My beauty killed you!"
49.The Foot: Silly filly, there's no hole in there.
48.The Lava Monsters: Roasted Man-Stick Barbecue, best served hot.
47.The school bully: Unless you're a jock.
46.Prostitute: Unless if trained.
45.A hive of Killer Bees: Though normal bees are fine. I did it, and attracted many chicks with the biggest swoolen dick in the world. Maybe I'll do it again.
44.Human: Don't get me started there.
42.The Doctor: See the number?
41.Murtaugh: He'll make a Karma Portal out of your dick for that.

40-31[edit | edit source]

40.Demons: They cause hell.
39.Glenn Quagmire: Don't bother. He'll have already raped you by the time you even think about it.
GIGGITY GIGGITY GOO
38.Imelda Marcos: Her shoes have the answer.
37.El Chupacabras: Not only will you have made it with a Mexican, but you'll have goat's blood all over you!
36.Rayquaza: It will use hyperbeam on ya, giving you a charred penis.
35.Fidel Castro:He likes Cigars.
34.Judas Iscariot: Since he betrayed Jesus Christ, he might do the same to you.
33.Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutated AIDS, STD, many other diseases.
32.Freddy Mercury: He died of AIDS, you had sex with him, you got AIDS, die, end.
31.Bobe: Congratulations, you are offically a Registered Sex Offender.

30-21[edit | edit source]

30. King Leonidas: TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL!
29.Bull: Unless you want to be tossed and trampled like a crushed Caesar salad.
27.Cthulhu: Tentacle rape, much?
26.Wild bush car: You'll be run over. D'uh!
25.Snapping turtle: Sounds painful, but not as bad as #24.
24.Shark: It not only won't give it back, but will then have a nice meal at your expense.
23.Piranha: Worse than sharks and snapping turtles combined.
22.Baby clown: I get nightmares thinking about it.
21.Jason Voorhees: Serial killer, request coitus, die, ???, PROFIT!

20-11[edit | edit source]

20.Pedobear: May give sensation and not discomfort if 91 years old above.
19.Grandma: The older the ass, the filthier
18.Ash ketchum:he is gay which explains why he never makes out with those pokemon girls.
17.Rarity: ಠ3ಠ
16.Robotnik: snooPINGAS usual, I see?
15.Blackbeard: You wanna have sex with a pirate? I didn't think so.
14.Vikings: Way worse than pirates.
13.Walrus: You'll need an oxygen tube for this one.
12.Sumo Wrestler: You'll need an oxygen tube for this one too
11.Hindu people: Kamasutra is the only reason why.

10-01[edit | edit source]

10.Platypus: It's already two animals at once, and Nature doesn't need another freak.
9.Ferret: Or any other small furry bastard that climbs up your pants and bites off your balls.
8.Hillbillies: For anyone who got kidnapped by one and ended up getting raped inside a log cabin.
7.Things: No! Please Not Those Things!
6.Martians: Not only because they're very foreign, but do you really wanna know where their privates are located?
5.Cannibal: May get hungry and mistake your dick for a Vienna sausage.
4.Ganon: YOU DARE BRING YOUR PENIS INTO MY LAIR? YOU MUST DIE!
3.A guy who looks like you: Like having sex with yourself but worse.
2.Porcupine: Do I need to explain why?
1.Justin Bieber: Holy Shit! Who on the planet would want to procreate with this creature?!
Worstlist.png
100 Animals
99 April Fools Jokes
98 Cartman Wannabes
97 Colors
96 Creatures to have sex with
95 Firefox extensions
94 Foods
93 Gifts to give a friend
92 Harry Potter Spin-offs
91 Inventions
90 Locations
89 LOL Cats
88 Make Out Songs
87 Moments to get a Boner
86 Moments to Laugh
85 Money Making Schemes
84 Movies
83 Nonexistent Words
82 Not In The Least Bit Sexual Things To Do With No Pants On
81 Nutty Conspiracy Theories
80 Overused Star Trek Episode Plots
79 Pokemon Cash-Ins
78 Porn Stars
77 Quick Detections that an Uncyclopedia page sucks
76 Weapons
75 Reflections on 2005
74 Reflections on 2006
73 Reflections on 2007
72 Reflections on 2008
71 Reflections on 2009
70 Reflections on 2010
69 Reflections on 2011
68 Reflections on 2012
67 Reflections on 2013
66 Reflections on 2018
65 Rejected Harry Potter Novels
64 Remakes
63 Restaurants
62 Self Help Books
61 Sexual Perversions
60 Short Poems
59 Sitcom Catchphrases
58 Songs
57 Songs about Seagulling
56 Songs To Have Sex To
55 Songs To Play At A Funeral
54 Spinoffs
53 Superheroes
52 Things About the '00s
51 Things to do during Christmas
50 Things to Put In An IV
49 Things To Say In Court
48 Things to Say in the Workplace
47 Things to say on a First Date
46 Toys
45 TV Programs
44 Uncyclopedia In-Jokes
43 Video Games of all time‎
42 Video Game Movies
41 Video Game Systems
40 Ways of Being a Dick
39 Ways To Be Castrated
38 Ways to be Circumcized
37 Ways to Deliver Bad News
36 Ways to Die
35 Ways to Kill Sarah Connor
34 Ways to Start a Novel
33 Ways to Win an Argument
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