User:Dexter111344/archive3

Old stuff(August 2006 to January 26, 2008)

More stuff(Jan. 26, 2008 to Aug. 1, 2008)

When will these people stop talking to me? (Aug. 1, 2008 to Sep. 15, 2009)

Apparently not soon... (Sep. 15th, 2009 - Jan. 1st, 2011)

Fuck you all to Hell and back (Jan. 1st, 2011 - April 5th, 2013

MASTURBATE!!! LOL!!

Beat you all to it. Now fuck off. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 12:46, 1 August 2008 (UTC)

...God dammit.... -RAHB 12:46, 1 August 2008 (UTC)

Cuz i iz pwnzor! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 12:48, 1 August 2008 (UTC)

Hea dude.

Enjoy your wiki break... MrN 22:53, Aug 6

Join the UnOrder Today!

~ Readmesoon

Hea!

Welcome back. :) THERE IS ONLY 1 ARTICLE ON VFD!!! WTF? MrN 22:21, Sep 1

I'll fix it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:23, 1 September 2008 (UTC)

I just put three on it. You want more? I got a bunch others ready. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:35, 1 September 2008 (UTC)

Dude, the way I see it... If there are not many on there, it's not flooding... So long as you think they are good noms, do it... I never nom more than 5 or 6 in a row myself, but whatever... MrN 22:42, Sep 1

I think I'm above the rule about not flooding anyway. I was just seeing if you wanted more. /me gets right on it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:44, 1 September 2008 (UTC)

&lol

&breath & lol & breath & lol. - [17:38 25 September] Sir FSt Don Yettie

Okay, I give. What? --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:27, 26 September 2008 (UTC)

You cum-machine

You're welcome ^{Pirate Lord}__Sonic80 (Yell  •  Latest literary excretion) __ 02:27, 29 September 2008 (UTC)

☺ or ☻ --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 02:44, 29 September 2008 (UTC)

Are you an admin, and if so, why did you delete my article on...

...YOUR MOM??? BAM! I GOT YOU! After all these months, I got you, Dex.   Le Cejak • <2:58, 30 Sep 2008>

I saw it was you. I check my watchlist before I check my talk. You didn't get me. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 03:05, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

It's okay to admit that I got you. I mean, really: I wrote a WHOLE article on your mom last Februtober.   Le Cejak • <3:10, 30 Sep 2008>

Okay... Sure. Haven't you been here for a year now? Congradulations. You have no life. So, you mind reading/voitng on this? It could be my first feature (even though I think I should have several...) if you (yes, you!) do... And about 10 other people... Maybe I should force Outtrigger to get on and vote for it... Even though he really has never done anything for this site (other than piss me off with the Mass Effect article he was going to write)... Outtrigger is my bitch. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 03:36, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

Conservation

Shall we agree to stop and call this one a tie? Nice work, by the way. --Mr. Monkey Pant-hoot here. 23:52, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

Yeah... The thing I'm working on won't be finished in time... --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:53, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

I could finish something right now, but I'm not gonna because I don't feel like sniping you, especially because we both actually did quite a bit in the past few weeks... --Mr. Monkey Pant-hoot here. 23:55, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

By the way, also these past two weeks, I've been nursing a sick kitten back to health (he's doing pretty well, but still has another week till I feel he'll really be perfect), sick myself, and had several projects I had to do for school. I'm amazed I even rewrote anything to be quite honest... --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:58, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

Same, except the kitten. I have a puppy. She wasn't sick, though, just really energetic. --Mr. Monkey Pant-hoot here. 00:00, 1 October 2008 (UTC)

A toast to being the best Uncyclopedian's and people ever! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:03, 1 October 2008 (UTC)

You both suck. I finish 1 article to tie you guys and you go ahead with 3 more! forced me into doing my half-assed Nintendo DS rewrite. ^{Pirate Lord}__Sonic80 (Yell  •  Latest literary excretion) __ 00:20, 4 October 2008 (UTC)

Heh. /me hugs Sonic. Love you, too. Even if my article (the one you reviewed) failed on VFH (which it shouldn't have, dammit!). --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:42, 4 October 2008 (UTC)

Penis

That is all... MrN 19:53, Dec 20

Slug

is the shit, yo. Stay left, stay def. =) sirsysrq @ 18:33 Dec 25

Someone else who knows Atmosphere?!? AMAZING!!! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:50, 25 December 2008 (UTC)

Frlz, yo. I listen to all kinds of Def Jux: El-P, Aes, Mr. Lif, Percy P, Vast Aire, Can Ox, all that good janks. sirsysrq @ 19:09 Dec 25

Where are you?

I hope you haven't found some kind of life outside:)--Sycamore (Talk) 13:34, 8 March 2009 (UTC)

Yea, I was wondering that! MrN 13:45, Mar 8

Don't worry. I'm just busy with school. I'm gonna be back at no-life-outside-of-Uncyclopedia beginning May 22 (Last day of school). If you want, you could harass me on my YouTube account by the same name... --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 14:57, 13 March 2009 (UTC)

(Block log); 15:02 . . MrN9000 (Talk | contribs | block) blocked Dexter111344 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 minute 
(Not edited Uncyc for a while. Welcome back man!)

VFD has missed ya... MrN 15:08, Mar 13

Lol MrN 01:22, Mar 18

Feature that, bitch. Oh wait, you're a Nigger! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:27, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

I tell you what, I think whoring in the QVFD header is a dam awesome idea. I'm ashamed I did not think of it. MrN 01:29, Mar 18

I'm still suspect of one of the against votes. But I don't wanna waste Sannse's time doing a Usercheck thing. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:31, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

Yea, that is a bit odd. As you say, it's no biggie. It's going to get featured, just a matter of time. MrN 01:36, Mar 18

'Bout damn time it got nominated. I rewrote it back in September for CW. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:40, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

You are obviously not a very good whore. MrN 01:41, Mar 18

I say we just feature everything I've written. And do my whole "kill all but the 7000 best articles"-idea. And elect me Premier of Columbia. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:43, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

I thought it was 4,000. You are obviously going soft. MrN 01:45, Mar 18

Whatever. Let's just make me Premier of Columbia. I deal with it then. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:47, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

I LUV U A BIG MUCHIES!!!!111111111 I LOVIES! --– Preceding unsigned comment added by 99.242.33.46 (talk • contribs)

That's not how you do it dammit! Quit biting! Just suck. There. That's more like it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:17, 21 March 2009 (UTC)

By Cabal decree and personal request...

I was wondering if you'd be interested in being a poopsmith, I'm not really that hardcore a VFD user, and I'm looking to take a backseat on things. Its a fairly simple thing, and you'll have RabbiTechno for bedtime company. Interested?:)--Sycamore (Talk) 17:59, 25 March 2009 (UTC)

Eh, I guess. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:42, 25 March 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, just ive in there, Rabbi and MrN9000 will be about if you need anyhting, remeber the keep tags on the talkpages of the articles kept. Mordillo said he was cool with it (more than cool I think when I suggested this) so I think you'll be fine diving in there. Good luck:)

You can also add this template to your userpage:

Designated Poopsmith ! This user is designated an official scooper-jocky for VFD . Pity them.

--Sycamore (Talk) 13:47, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

With regards to Dexter I'm never cool. I'm very hawt. ~ 13:57, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

Hey Dexter matey. Seen you around the ol' site for a while now, but I don't think we've met as of yet. So I'll take this opportunity to say hello and welcome aboard the rusting old hulk that is HMS Poop. :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 15:59, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

Did anyone get him the hazmat suit? ~ 16:10, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

Who has the shovel? MrN 16:11, Mar 26

Damn it, I totally forgot the hazmat. Still, you soon build up a resistance and can manage without one. I cut myself on my first day (accidentally, not in some pathetic emo way) and it got infected. Three days later I went into a coma and when I woke up all my limbs and my penis had fallen off, but on the plus side I now have immunity to all forms of bacteria. So it seems there are good things about this job after all. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 16:16, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

This will totally inspire Dex for the job. ~ 16:19, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

You make it sound as though having neither limbs nor penis is in some way an undesirable state to be in. How odd of you. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 16:25, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

Congrats on your first feature

Now go eat an apple.Saberwolf116 05:03, 29 March 2009 (UTC)

Dude, I wish I had some. I haven't eaten one in about a week. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:07, 29 March 2009 (UTC)

ummmmmm

It doesn't look like SEHS was actually featured. The template seems to have been added completely out of process by a rogue user. pillow talk 20:40, 2 April 2009 (UTC)

Yes... It seems so... Hm... --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:43, 2 April 2009 (UTC)

Conservation Project

Can I take a crack at Uncyclopedia:Store and have it count as a "conservation"? It needs an advanced level of love and editing to make it highlight material and I'd love to give it a shot as part of my 3 rewrites.--    00:04, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Yes. Yes you may. Use the force, young one. Also, use The Critic. Cause that was a great cartoon. I loved it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:06, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

It Stinks!--    00:09, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

... Ack um! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:12, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

I'm also going to do Battle of Hastings, so I just need to find one more article to touch-up.--    00:13, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Good. Since it's my spring break next week, I'm gonna rewrite at least 10 articles. I know Jessica Alba is gonna be one of them. And Microsoft Sidewinder. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:16, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

So, apparently that naughty person who wrote "store" was big on the gibberish writing but he could sure HTML format and make animated GIFS. That one might take 5 days.--    00:21, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Good luck. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:25, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Hea you slut

Fancy knocking up another slut list? We have not had one for a while. The sluts are starting to ask questions. MrN 15:33, Apr 5

You're the slut. And I did it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 16:29, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Slut. (sexy) Sometimes we include the previous positions to show the movers and shakers, but I guess it's cool. Thanks man. MrN 16:40, Apr 5

I'm fucking lazy. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 16:45, 5 April 2009 (UTC)

Conservation

A bit of a mixup here. The PLS doesn't end until at least after the winners are announced. How about you push the Conservation week a week further and I'll change the template on the main page in a few days so everyone will join in? ~ 18:12, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

What about the people who have already begun? Tell them to wait a bit? --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:22, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Sounds like a good idea. ~ 21:25, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

You Mother Fucker...

Just kidding. Can I still call "dibs" on all those articles I plan on rewriting? And will my Ingmar Bergman article still count towards my rewrite total? (If the answer to either of those questions is "no," I'm going to kill your family. Not really.) I mean, if not that's cool but I'm just curious. —Sir Guildensternenstein 23:25, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Oh, this is of course all in reference to your botching of the Conseravition thingy, just so you know. —Sir Guildensternenstein 23:26, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Oh, and don't think I'm mocking you or anything by calling you on your "botch," because I'm not. —Sir Guildensternenstein 23:27, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

I hate you. —Sir Guildensternenstein 23:28, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Balls. —Sir Guildensternenstein 23:28, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Yes (to both answers). That other guy has... Issues. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:58, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Your mother

Nothing in particular about her. Just thought I would mention her. Anyway... As you are answering all the questions and such these days... What qualifies as a rewrite? What if a pages has all the crap cut out, formatting fixed, and "some" new text added. Where is the line for what counts as a "rewrite" Eh, Eh, Eh? ... Now answer that you goat fucking necrophilia protagonist. MrN 23:33, Apr 6

There has to be a significant change/addition to an article. The line is right here: ∟. Note what said line does. The article must improve in quality. Guess that means you can't enter. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:02, 7 April 2009 (UTC)

Unlike your mother. Who (of course), everyone enters... MrN 00:03, Apr 7

♦7☼♥╬╝○+M*≤8±8☼GGo▐▐▐M --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:08, 7 April 2009 (UTC)

I knew that

I was just testing you. – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 20:33 Apr 08, 2009

Sounds believable to me! Would you like some pie? --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:35, 8 April 2009 (UTC)

Depends on the sort of pie we're talking about, here. – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 20:37 Apr 08, 2009

P.S. I was definitely considering a wizard did it. But I was like... let's go for something nobody remembers. – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 20:40 Apr 08, 2009

Aight. And about the pie... I meant your mother. Dick! I remember what you did! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:41, 8 April 2009 (UTC)

Really? I don't. It happens when you're wasted. Do remind me. – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 20:46 Apr 08, 2009

1. (Block log); 13:36 . . Dr. Skullthumper (Talk | contribs) blocked Dexter111344 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 hours (Hey, look what I found, butthole.) --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:48, 8 April 2009 (UTC)

   Oh yeah... PLAGIARIZER! – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 20:50 Apr 08, 2009

My Vote Against Socks

It was a joke . I know you can't go there and vote against another contributor . --Romartus 09:18, 10 April 2009 (UTC)

Actually, you can, but you can only vote one time each month, so that'd mean you couldn't vote for someone else anymore. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 09:29, 10 April 2009 (UTC)

I figured it was a joke. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 16:26, 10 April 2009 (UTC)

We appear to have Schrödinger's article

Well, forum. If you go there via the vandal's edit and then go via my move you get different states. How the fuck did I manage that? –—Hv (talk) 11/04 18:22

I've got no fucking idea. Let Modus sort it out. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:24, 11 April 2009 (UTC)

Paula Abdul's a fucking bitch

shes an ugly man, a bitch and she loves fucking dog's ass-holes. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Koopaloopa35 (talk • contribs)

But nobody cares. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:56, 11 April 2009 (UTC)

Okay, she may be ugly, and is certainly and alcoholic (what a stupid cunt, jesus fucking christ), but you're just getting silly with this dog fucking business. Let it go, why obsess over it? -- Hi, hey! I'M A MOTERFUCKING NIGGER BITCH LOVER 21:11, 11 April 2009 (UTC)

Conservation is now officially on

Go forth and prosper. Don't forget to update the dates. ~ 11:45, 12 April 2009 (UTC)

Conservation Questions

Are we allowed to submit the articles we re-write for Pee Review and VFH while Conservation week is going on? Just curious. —Sir Guildensternenstein 16:09, 12 April 2009 (UTC)

There's no rule against it. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:03, 12 April 2009 (UTC)

A dead body

Would you please explain the article a bit at Uncyclopedia:VFH/Why?:Is a dead body lying on my couch? I don't think they get it. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 23:49, 16 April 2009 (UTC)

press

hey dex, just wondering if you had a comment for the unsignpost regarding the fact that, despite being a reigning greasy mechanic, you have made several edits during the current conservation week that have not been rewrite-related. what gives? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 15:08, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Bad weather fucks up my Internet. I'm editing this right now from school! The librarian just told me to leave. And I've rewritten Zeus. The other two things I've agreed to rewrite will be rewritten, as well. Just give me another day. Dex out! --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:08, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Please Go Here

And tell your friends--Smokin' Cheddar BBQ: The King of the Triangular Snackfoods 02:23, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

It might take a little bit

But I will finish my conservation projects. I just feel that subjects like "how to be British" and McDonald's need proper time and attention to be truly good.--    15:10, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

I feel the same way. I'm busy working on a movie for film class. And for the hell of it. Cause it's easier to make people do as I tell them than it is to actually do stuff. Also, the swine flu or some bs reason... Yeah. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:15, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost

I don't think a bot is gonna pop up anytime soon, so you might just as well start delivering it. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:05, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Just as soon as I remove all traces of Tyler Welsh from the site. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:07, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Good luck with that. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:10, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

I did it. And now, time for UnSignpost delivering. Actually, give it another 40 minutes. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:17, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Actually, I'll start now. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:20, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

How is moving to a talkpage easier to deliver? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 06:43, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

Cause all I have to do is press the "+" tab, type "U" which auto-fills, then press Ctrl+V, and press save page. It shaves off about 8 seconds. Yeah... --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 10:49, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

I moved it. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:54, 2 May 2009 (UTC)

delivery

thanks again for delivering the signpost! you really are a useful fellow. i'm thinking about putting you on the list of paperbots...SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 15:01, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

Works for me. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:45, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

You really should be granted bot status. I look forward to your excessive spamming in the future. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:57, 2 May 2009 (UTC)

/smiles. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:59, 2 May 2009 (UTC)

Why was this left out?

I don't know. I use this thingy that Spang wrote that one time, which automatifies the fuckulation of the page. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:23, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

Hmm... Spang is a hack. --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:29, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

He knows more about stuff of this nature than I. He's my Yoda. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:33, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

im a whore

vote for me please--Smokin' Cheddar BBQ: The King of the Triangular Snackfoods 23:31, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

HOW

dare you respond to this message ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 23:36, 3 May 2009 (UTC)

Hey, um... I see you missed your period. Preggo? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:37, 3 May 2009 (UTC)

Re-Reminder

Heya,

I'd like to draw your attention to a couple of policies:

• Uncyclopedia:Civility
• Beginner's_Guide/No_lip

Accepting my broadcast challenge to write new material was a good idea. Everything you did after that was not. It was an error, and I won't hold a grudge, but please refrain from this sort of behaviour in the future (and particularly with the senior admins).

Cheers,

--T. (talk) 03:50, 4 May 2009 (UTC)

Where are you?

What happened to you? I care, man. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:07, 6 May 2009 (UTC)

For Mahm00shA

Helpful Whoring-- Whore cHeDDaR 19:15,6May,2009

Hey

It's that time again! YAY WHORING!!!-- Whore cHeDDaR 01:13,7May,2009

This will make you happy

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Enjoy.

Saberwolf116 03:09, 9 May 2009 (UTC)

DUDE THEY ARE NOMMING SO CASH ON VFH

Don't let this fail. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 18:25, 9 May 2009 (UTC)

Well, it's too late now. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 10:38, 10 May 2009 (UTC)

This is a damn shame. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:23, 10 May 2009 (UTC)

I wonder what happened to him. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:27, 11 May 2009 (UTC)

Todd Lyons banned him awhile back, I hope he comes back. ~Formerly Annoying Crap 21:32, 11 May 2009

I noticed that too, but he was only banned for 1 day. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:33, 11 May 2009 (UTC)

Dude

Come back to Uncyclopedia, we miss you! Also, I PEE'd on your article. Saberwolf116 03:26, 16 May 2009 (UTC)

Also, I burning your dog. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 04:20, 18 May 2009 (UTC)

Takin' out the trash

I know you're likely avoding Uncyclopedia as a whole, but on the off chance that you decide to read this, I just thought you should know i've copied your vfd list onto my own. If you decide to return, don't be surprised if everything on your list is a redlink. Cheers! Saberwolf116 21:24, 19 May 2009 (UTC)

Ljlego?

When was the last time that nigguh came around these here parts? Welcome back. Douche. -- Roman Dog Bird 01:26, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

I've got no idea. I was hoping that since I'm back and that since Cajek seems to be back, Ljlego would appear. Probably not, though. Oh well. Any problems with idiots editing articles? --MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:28, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Problems? Like....hell, epidemics......and shit. You bet. Oh, and like MrNigger9000 before me, I'm black. But I feel so pretty inside. Like a flower garden. How can I be both of these things at once?! -- Roman Dog Bird 01:40, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Hmm... Well, I have no fucking idea. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:43, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Is it a good or bad thing that I assumed the link in "So close to getting some!!!" went to sick? • Spang • ☃ • talk • 02:16, 28 May 2009

I'd say good. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 13:42, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Hey dude

Welcome back; I was getting worried. Three other users are gone, and I only did the "New Poopsmiths" thing because I was freaking out about VFD- it and Pee Review mean so much to me. Sorry if you took offense- welcome back! *me searches for other missing users* Saberwolf116 04:07, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

You do realize

That you were banned for only 24 hours and not days, right? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 05:00, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

I didn't even know I had been banned. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 13:42, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Hmm again

Sorry, my brotehr was on my Uncyclopedia account while I went out :( Hamster6 • [talk]

Hmm

I didnt kno we had the image already Hamster6 • [talk]

You tried

I commend you for nicely inserting your opinions into this situation. We try to be nice, but sometimes it doesn't promote efficiency. Cheers! Oh, and I owe you one of these. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 00:14, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

WELCOME TO UNNEWS

On your knees, worthy one! The Right Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator blesses you. Your blessings are increasing exponentially. In the name of Sophia, the Church of Uncyclopedia and the Universal Church Triumphant of the Apathetic Agnostic, kneel and receive the melding of Zim's holy axe and your wetware. Now go write me a good UnNews article. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 03:48, March 15, 2010 (UTC)

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Dexter111344, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

---

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

---

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

---

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

---

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)

Hmm... Glad to see I've been welcomed to your cult. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:17, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

17?!

I thought you were a year older than me, not younger!!! Anyways, happy birthday,

-- Roman Dog Bird 22:57, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Um... Thanks? But yeah. I'm younger. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:35, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

You asshole!

Belated thanks for the UotMnom. Where do I send the bribe? -OptyC Sucks! CUN15:37, 6 Jun

Ah Dex

Please don't go around threating to perma ban people. Last time I checked it was my job. ~ 22:09, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey, sometimes I gotta threaten so they'll shut the fuck up. I'm not even sure which time you're referring to but fine. Whatever to please Moardildos. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 05:35, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

I think it was swordfish. But seriously, don't threaten. Just use the BP. ~ 09:59, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Fine grandpa. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:42, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

<mocking>Oh, oh, I'm Dexter111344 and I can do whatever I want</mocking> regardless of peoples' feelings!

But at least the "Cahitlerjek" thing was funny, right?   Le Cejak • <0:01 Jun 16, 2009>

Hey. I'm about to do something though. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:02, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Whooooo!

*claps* BRAVO! BRAVO! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 20:34, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

At the matter of fact

I actually do sleep. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 08:49, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

I doubt it Mr. 20410-edits-to-Uncyclopedia! You're a robot! I know it! A Belgian robot/waffle-maker! MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 08:50, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

Believe whatever you want to believe. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 08:55, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

Hooray!

Beginning of Time is dead! Now hurry up and archvie it so that we can put more on. Saberwolf116 17:53, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

I am. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:54, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Oakwood

Don't worry Dex, I have a feeling that one way or another, it'll die soon enough... No hard feelings, eh? ;-) --UU - natter 09:52, Jun 24

/evil glares followed by maniacal laughter. And it was just pissing me off looking at it cause I hadn't gone to sleep in more than 24 hours. And that I got a few hours of rest, I could care less about it. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 15:56, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Cowbell

Don't contribute to the killing this article, it was amazing before people like you came and deleted everything. --75.67.212.238 02:26, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

YEAH! ASSHOLE!!!!!!11!1!!1!!! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 02:31, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

YEAH! HOW DARE I REVERT THE ADDITION OF SOME UNFUNNY LISTS!!! MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 02:33, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

Just because you don't have a sense of humor doesn't mean everyone else doesn't, that was the best part of the whole article. --75.67.212.238 02:35, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND HUMOR YOU BIG DOODY-HEAD?!!! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 02:37, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

I KNOW!!! A LIST WITH CHUCK NORRIS, BARACK OBAMA, AND A BUNCH OF OTHER PEOPLE IS SO FUNNY!!! HOW DARE I DOUBT THAT!!! MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 02:44, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

Can you teach me how to become an admin please?

I want to know what it feels like to be admin. |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Kemador CUN|IC Kill | 04:51, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

Well, I know this is hard to believe, but I'm not an admin. I would never want to be an admin. Ask one of these people. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 06:01, 29 June 2009 (UTC)

top contributor

I just saw this. Makes sense. --Docile hippopotamus 03:51, 12 July 2009 (UTC)

Two articles on VFD...

...done by User:Thomasfan666. Both have had a bit of work done to them but both fall well short of the Uncyclopedia standard, however both are less than a day old. I've glued an ICU to the article for the moment. Are we able to throw these back into his user space and remove them from QVFD for the moment. This user had an attack of the "Nucking futz" and has had a few issues in the past as well, but I'd rather not just wipe these out completely. Maybe 80% gone, but not completely. Pup t 01:35, 19/07/2009

Wait, are you talking about Vice City or something else? Cause that nomination is kinda invalid as it was kept less than 24 hours ago on VFD... So yeah. I'm just waiting for an admin to close that (since I technically can't do...). Just don't worry about it. Let an admin deal with it. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:44, 19 July 2009 (UTC)

'Kay. I found what you're talking about. I put an ICU on the other one, too. Just horrible. And I think they are possibly vanity. Let an admin decide when the ICU run-outs to move it to his userspace or not. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:49, 19 July 2009 (UTC)

Fantasy Football

Would you be interested? Message me back on my talkpage if so. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 23:33, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

Robbie Fowler

The above article is shite which is presumably why you put an ICU on it. Robbie Fowler is worth a page however. I've been trying to encourage the author to improve it. He appears to be illiterate but he's made some effort. I'm kind of new, if it's still shite in a week would it be very bad form to blank the current bollocks and replace it with something else? --Sog1970 21:07, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

It is not only acceptable for you to edit it, it is your duty to edit it. For the greater good of Uncyclopedia!

Although having said I've came across similar issues. I send a note through to the author of the page, and stick something on the talk page, saying "Hey, can I have this? If I don't hear anything over the next couple of days, I'm going to assume that you've abandoned it." Then I wait a couple of days, or wait for the author's okay, and then take it over and do it my way. But remember that if it's ICU then it's likely to be deleted shortly anyway, so there's always the possibility that you create User:Sog1970/Robbie Fowler and create one while the inspiration is on and just wait until the old one gets axed. That also means you don't have embarrassing stuff in your pages history. Pup t 23:29, 24/07/2009

Yeah... What ol' POTR said. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:38, 24 July 2009 (UTC)

RE: Hey Nate

That's creepy, particularly the parts about you knowing my name and referencing Conservapedia. --EMC ^[TALK] 20:22, 25 July 2009 (UTC)

RE: RE: Hey Nate

Oy! Good find. Which one are you? Are you the one with the brown hair and shit-eating grin? --EMC ^[TALK] 02:29, 26 July 2009 (UTC)

1992

G'day mate. Howsit hangin'? Jus found this as part of this. And I know you were doing this so I thought, bonza, he'd have a crack at that. Irf ya don't wannit, just QVFD it. Sweet mate! Pup t 03:31, 29/07/2009

Also created 1996 with stuff from the same place. I haven't looked at it to see if any of it is any good, so don't blame me. Pup t 03:41, 29/07/2009

Thanks, POTR. I only used a few of the 1992 ones, but I see a handful of 1996 things I will use when I get around to it either this week or next. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 13:07, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Fucking magical

Hey Dexter, wanna do a collab on A wizard did it: A Retrospective? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 10:31, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

YES! Possibly include how it has swept the globe? Also, this'll be my first collaboration, so I'm kinda unfamiliar with all the positions. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 13:07, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

I was thinking about offering several interpretations of the sentence. Kinda like with Fisher Price, but a little bit less over the top. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:32, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Alright. I see where you're going. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 15:33, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

A quote perhaps?

Would you happen to have a quote for the UnSignpost about what's going on over at User:Gwax/Timeline rebuild? Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:41, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah. I think it's fucking great we're letting a wizard rewrite history. Like fucking magical or something. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:44, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Stone the Israeli Tank

In Stone th Israeli Tank you added :pl interwiki Kamieniowanie izraelskiego czołgu for my request but in comment you said i have to be from Brazil... Hm... (Tbh I don't get this joke...) Why did you think i could be from Brazil. I ask just because of curiosity:P Answer here please thank you pl:User:Ptok Bentoniczny

My mother is NOT a prostitute

A "prostitute" provides sex in EXCHANGE for monetary compensation. My mother provides sex FREE of charge. I hope this clarifies things. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Projectjulio (talk • contribs)

Signpost:

I put a draft for the newest signpost issue, but nobody cares for it. What do you think of it?: Recently in the forums, BHOP's activity has arguably skyrocketed. An IP has started a new rhyming craze, the cheesy, crunchy snack food CheddarBBQ has revived many topics that were getting rather aged, such as Fantasy Football, a Shakira-esque topic, and even his own birthday's topic. Back on BHOP, the fruity user Neox's random storytelling and serious user YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans' serious, dramatic storytelling have made Forum:Who HATES MochiAds? 2's story a complete, random mess. Finally, users have a had a heated battle over whether to ban the Abstain feature on VFH, which is ending up off-topic in the most random of ways. That's the forum news in your area, now here's Mr. G with the weather.--Bad Shroom 22:29, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

I'd say get rid of the part about the retrospective because that's not BHOP-related. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:38, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Okay, how about now?--Bad Shroom 22:40, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

User:Sockpuppet of an unregistered user/The Land Before Time

A possible start to the Land Before Time article. If you want to add anything or have a better idea for the article, knock yourself out. TKF showed some interest as well, so he might help out too. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:35, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

And there's also User:Sockpuppet of an unregistered user/The Land Before Human History, if you're interested. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:08, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

My activity is gonna see a sudden drop beginning tomorrow. School. I'll see if I can think of anything to add. If I don't, oh well, right? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:28, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

I just thought I'd let you now, since you said on VFD you might write it when you're bored in class. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 00:11, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

There

Happy now? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 01:07, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Hell yes. I wake up and find this. Thanks for giving what will be a horrible day a great start, Socky. Off to school in 5... MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 11:05, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Senses Fail Article Deleted?

I don't see why you're targetting my Senses Fail article. I understand that there were two previous articles which were deleted, but that is why I wanted to write a three page article on the subject with both truth and fiction instead of ignorant bias. I deleted a LOT of immiture content and unnessesary links but I don't think it matters. I used several articles, such as the Metallica article which I read in its entirely for inspiration and used techniques from the beginners guide. I'm not sure what exactly caused my article to be deleted. If it was the links, I ahve deleted most of the sarcastic ones. I just want the reason because this is far from the most immature article on this site. – Preceding unsigned comment added by MrFlopz (talk • contribs)

First off, I don't know what other two articles you are talking about, not that that matters. Secondly, it just isn't funny. Thirdly, most band articles are not funny. Um... Fourthly, learn to sign your posts. It's in the beginner's guide you said you read. Fifthly, I really don't think I could help you make this funny. Sixthly, it hasn't been deleted. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:02, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Well, MrFlopz, let's first clarify one thing. Dexter isn't the one who nominated your article for deletion, I was. Not that it matters. As far as why, MrN left a note on the article's talkpage, but allow me to eloborate a bit further. Unlike Wikipedia, we don't feel the need to have an article on every band that ever put out an album. Writing a humorous band article is notoriously difficult to do, even for Uncyc vets. They almost invariably end up the same way:

<insert band name here> is the best/worst/emo. <insert band name here> members include Jesus/Satan/Hitler. <insert band name here> once killed Santa/slept with Paris Hilton/fought terrorists. Here's an unfunny random list of albums/songs/band members that <insert band name here> are responsible for:

Jesus

Chuck Norris

Mr. T.

????

Stupid

For the record, the Metallica article is no exception, so looking to that for inspiration is your first mistake. /me heads off to nom Metallica for deletion. -Pleb TWAT Optyc1337 • Complain here • Vote now! 12:01 8/12/2024 MR FLOPZ: Yeah, I wrote that when I thought there was no hope for redemption. I cleaned up the article. Its still not mature humor, but I didn't think maturity was the key here.

I noticed Metallica was semi-protected, which I found strange for an incredibly stupid article. I skimmed over most of the redundant stuff but I got to the end. There were a few jokes that really made me laugh even though most was just stupid. I wanted to make an article with a lot of facts, but some random sarcasm thrown in. I know you have read through hundreds of these things so there is little hope of you finding any humor in my article, but I considered it moderately funny. Moderators who never heard of them weren't my target audience. Just wanted an "Eh, its tolerable"

By the way, most people I know have heard "Can't Be Saved" or "Rum is For Drinking Not Burning", but that's because I'm merely an 18 year old. :(

Edit conflict you bugger

I was doing exactly that!. Serious. MrN 00:48, Aug 9

Yeah. Sure you were. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:50, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Lier. MrN 01:02, Aug 9

And that isn't how you spell "lier." MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:04, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Yes it is. MrN 01:07, Aug 9

Liar. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:09, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

If he was doing the exact same thing, wouldn't that make him a Lyre? Okay, Lyre bird... Pup t 01:39, 9/08/2009

All I know is that he has a great pair of jugs. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here

I was just thinking I wouldn't mind a couple of Beers myself Pup t 01:50, 9/08/2009

Thang

Because you reverted some weird guy's edit on my userpage. zh/SG/13:34 August 10

There appears to be something wrong with my sig. zh/SG/13:34 August 10

No problem. And I have no idea what happened to your sig. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:33, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

BP

Didn't we have already the discussion about threatening other users? ~ 23:36, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

He broke the rules, I told him not to. Twice. I'm not threatening to ban him. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:38, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Just ban me for an hour. I'm being a douche. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:39, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

I saw just one message on his talk page that already mentioned BP. ~ 23:40, 10 August 2009 (UTC)

Monsieur Dexteur

Hi Dexter, thanks for showing interest in this scheme, there seems to be little interest in getting involved elsewhere on this site. Anyway, latest word is that Fire Wolf has suggested a meeting on IRC for all the ambassadors and interested parties so we can come to some clear objectives and rules regarding the running on future of the project. Are you interested? Also, any word from the Japanese yet? --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 19:55, 14 August 2009 (UTC)

Could you please...

...remove the articles that InMooseWeTrust has nominated for deletion from the VFD queue, please? It's pretty obvious from both his Pees and his VFD nominations Moose hasn't a fucking clue what he's doing. If you're unable to do this, could you find someone with the power to do so? Seriously. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:12, 20 August 2009 (UTC)

MrN's closed them, so now I'll do it. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:28, 20 August 2009 (UTC)

Wat

are you doing? -OptyC Sucks! CUN19:04, 29 Aug

I'm craving attention. Really, I just want it to go on a bit longer with better insults to the crazy guy. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:07, 29 August 2009 (UTC)

Ah, I can dig that. Also, I still have that cream dispenser all nice and warm if you're really craving attention. -OptyC Sucks! CUN19:09, 29 Aug

Nope. I'm not into that sort of thing. Mohammed is, though. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:15, 29 August 2009 (UTC)

I love you, man. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:28, 29 Aug

So this is my son. Talking to a young boy about him helping him out with a picture of a penis that he likes. I can't say I'm impressed with either of you. MrN 04:06, Aug 30

Opty is your son? Well, that explains a lot. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 04:16, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Why am i uploading all these images?

I'm working on an article, it will all make sense in about an hour or so - unresistered user

Dude

You're a total noob. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 19:08, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Shut up. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:10, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Dude

I know that. S-984 19:16, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Dude

I know that. S-984 19:16, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Dude

"If we cannot claim her heart, at least she's in the arms of a truly worthy adversary."

"Witness the magic of Uncyclopedia!" And witness the new image I made for my new and improved welcome message. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:34, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I did a Google search for "a wizard did it" without "quotes". There were 15,200,000 hits, and the Uncyc article was 4th. Now don't you feel ashamed of yourself? --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 20:29, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

First off, it's 15,300,000 hits. Secondly, the goal is to get my page above Wikipedia and Urban Dictionary by the end of the year. It can stay behind TVTropes since I don't care about them. Thirdly, I'm not ashamed in the least. Fourthly, it's fucking magical. Fifthly, my horrible YouTube video for it is on the next page. Sixthly, I actually showed this semi-good-looking girl the article today when I was in Japanese on the teacher's computer. She thought it was funny. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 20:48, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Dude, you should semi-ask her out! A girl who appreciates wizards is worth keeping. Sort of. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 21:03, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Lol. That's like semi-magical or something. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:14, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Yeah but I have this thing for another girl who doesn't at all appreciate me, my sexual advances, or wizards. Quite depressing really. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:18, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Why stop at one, when you can have them all, through magic! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:21, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

They are both bi... Hmm... Why?:Didn't I think of a threesome before?! MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:23, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

You should totally write that. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:35, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I just may. Or at least write Why?:Have a threesome?. Also, great images guys, really. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:37, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

You want me to put a link to A wizard did it in my welcome message? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:45, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Yes. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:46, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Consider it done. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:49, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I considered it. Now I have to piss. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:52, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Welcome! Witness the magic of Uncyclopedia! Hello Dexter111344, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for registering an account. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... Yes. You seem to have a sense of humor, but to be sure that it corresponds to the kind of humor that is accepted on this site, I suggest checking out the following links: Beginner's Guide - A massive guide about how to be the best you can be at Uncyclopedia. I've honestly never read the whole thing in one sitting myself, but it is very useful if you're looking for help on a specific issue. How to be funny and not just stupid - Our flagship link. This will tell you how to not get booed off the metaphorical stage that is Uncyclopedia. I STRONGLY suggest reading the entire thing through, perhaps more than once. Our Vanity Policies - This page details why we don't care about your friends, your school, your gay fourth period math teacher, or the homework he has you do, and in-jokes. DO NOT violate these rules. Uncyclopedia:Best of - For a bit of inspiration. These are our featured articles. This is the kind of stuff we like to read around here. Now that that's out of the way, just continue reading and you'll notice some more links. These ones are about help in general: About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia How to get started editing on Uncyclopedia Help Pages - If you need help with a specific issue. Frequently Asked Questions - Check this out before you start panicking. Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask - For some general facts about Uncyclopedia. At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but I do recommend it, it can be quite enjoyable, and it's a good chance to let others take notice of your writing. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Dexter111344/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well. If you want to write and don't know where to begin, consider contributing to Uncyclopedia's current colonization of the week, a group writing project to improve a single popular article. Anyone is welcome to contribute, so come help out! If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in! If you need help, ask me on my talkpage, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talkpage. Additionally, the Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian, and remember: Have fun with it. We're all here to have a good time and a good laugh. Please sign your name on talkpages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. Again, welcome! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:57, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

Now you can consider yourself welcomed. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:57, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I preferred it when Tom Mayfair did it alooooooooooong time ago. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 21:58, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I preferred it when he was actually doing stuff, instead of dropping by to ban me or my IP. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:07, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

I preferred it, too, but you can't always get everything you want. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:09, 31 August 2009 (UTC)

IP

IP got owned. Don't delete!--Almost Sir Random Crap

Don't worry. I won't add it to QVFD. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:34, September 5, 2009 (UTC)

Why, you little Captain Sarcasm! If you're not sarcastic though, protect it or something. Tell others. I don't know. I feel like an idiot right now.--Almost Sir Random Crap

Only admins can protect. Believe it or not, I'm not an admin. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 01:43, September 5, 2009 (UTC)

I can't believe it. You and Socky are the hardest-working users in this dump. You should both be admins, damnit!--Almost Sir Random Crap

Well, I don't want to be an admin (I get enough people who hate me as it is), and I don't thing Socky wants to be, either. Plus, I think the cabal intends to make Cajek the next admin. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:25, September 5, 2009 (UTC)

Hey.

What's up man? You ever gonna finish that book you were writing for like a year? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? D.E.X. Bulshit, Ass, Bitch, Anal Cancer, Dick 23:05, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

FU faggot. You know damn well how bad my rough draft was. And I don't intend to finish it ever fucker. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 23:06, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

Wizard WIP

I started an article on the wizard who did it but then I realized I have absolutely nothing to say. Any ideas? If not, I'll try again later with a clearer head. --C:\syndrome\_ 01:58, September 11, 2009 (UTC)