I rape you like a goat rapes a goatess. Your raping has taken place upon a print-out of History of Great Britain. Rapedy rape. Aleister 18:07 16-8-'11
Hello friend, Romartus, and deers. I forgot which page of yours I added large lettering to the top of, politely asking you to please nominate some of your articles for featuring. My God man, have you seen the crap that has made it to the front page, and yet you have at least a dozen masterpieces just collecting virtual dust? Your pages shine like brillant stars twenty million light-years away, so they can hardly be seen but you really don't want to land spaceships on them. As long as the "treasure trove" here at Uncy is its collected feature stories, holding your out for ransom or whatever it is scars the very idea of the place. Or not. Anyway, I won't nom any because every time I did you pulled it and told me the page wasn't done. So.....in other stuff, I haven't been on very much and miss a few of you, and you may count yourself in that disgraced category. Keep up the good work and take as many wooden nickels as your pockets can hold. Aleister 18:36 24-10-'11
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AG FANKS MAN! You was prove you are not a sout piel and now you can like to get dis template because you did pay attentions... Now go milk dat bliksimse cow!
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...for the kind words and for getting me started. i just feel a bit uncyc-ed out at present. Started a couple things, could see how they'd work, couldn't summon the enthusiasm. Happened to mention to Bony that I wanted to get my teeth into something longer and meater and see if i actually can. And lo, Bony hath given me something interesting to keep me going for a few months. I guess I'll be around a bit. Must go vote on your Augustus article. --Sog1970 22:46, November 8, 2011 (UTC)
- Hey Soggy. Thanks for the compliment! I look forward to reading any new works that may come out with a collab with Funnybony! --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:49, November 9, 2011 (UTC)
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Thank you for voting
You have recieved a single pass to the Jones Family Memorial Museum to see all the artifacts retrieved without incident by the various Joneses. The museum remains the most popular location in the continental United States to be crushed by a boulder, despite that wanky 127 Hours film. --Nikau 02:32, November 9, 2011 (UTC)
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And for the top 3 vote, too. --Nikau 02:42, November 9, 2011 (UTC)
Hey man I feel we are getting on to something here. Our styles are meshing well upon a thorough read of the whole article and I encourage you to add some, we are close to a wrap here! If in doubt, use the talk page as I do. This article is so easy to write, even stating the plain facts would be hilarious! I added some to it, feel free to retouch my adds and add to the very good paragraphs you came up with, like "childhood". We're not in a hurry, but this guy is providing so much laugh that it is scary coming from a presidential candidate! Did you see the "Smoking ad"? LMAO!!! Mattsnow 06:08, November 17, 2011 (UTC)
- Thanks Matt. The problem with someone like Cain is that he says so many stupid things that we may have a problem trying to top that! I have added a few extra lines and will read through to see where it can be improved. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 11:38, November 17, 2011 (UTC)
Hey Rommy, you and I may be sysops soon so I thought I ought to come and talk to you. I just want you to know I think you'll do a great job, and that if you need someone to hold your hand, or any other body parts, as we make this great journey together then I'll be here for you. VFS brothers ho! So should we bump chests now? --Black Flamingo 17:31, November 21, 2011 (UTC)
- Hi BF. Is the VFS business for one or two Sysops? I admit I know nothing about 'bots', programming, Computer Language Humour for Nerds, Linux (same thing as before?) etc so if anyone asks me a tech question I will point them in your direction. Thanks for the contact! --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 17:50, November 21, 2011 (UTC)
- Well, first we were to have zero, then the admins caved and we were to have one. Then they caved further and now we look set to have two. Don't ask for anything else or they'll end up trapped under the earth forever. --Black Flamingo 17:11, November 22, 2011 (UTC)
- I personally believe Sysops shouldn't be for life on any website. They should stand for re-election if they so chose or perhaps have a fixed term. If this site wants to make me a Sysop that is what I will do. Since I think you will need at least two or three months to understand what the job entails, perhaps a six month or a max of one year should be a term. Also, not all sysops should go up for election at the same time either. This will prevent any attempts at clean sweep revolutions to introduce compulsory Sonic the Hedgehog articles. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 09:05, November 23, 2011 (UTC)
- I don't really feel too strongly either way about that, but apparently they can de-op themselves now, so there is always that option for you when you finally get the op. I may end up doing it myself when I inevitably make a right pig's ear of things. --Black Flamingo 17:30, November 23, 2011 (UTC)
- And both ye wee bastards should quit immediately if you feel the job eating into your writing time or even the incentive to write. I'm serious and just killed my cat to prove it. And congrats to you both (but beware, be afraid, be very afraid. and beware.). Aleister 17:43 23-11-'11
Thanks for voting for me[edit source]
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Thanks for voting for me for Noob Of The Month
As a reward, I give you one of my pizzas!
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Thank you very, very much for voting for me. -- 03:12, November 22, 2011 (UTC)
- No problem but are you being a bit premature here? Voting ends 30th November, you could get pipped at the post!--RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:08, November 22, 2011 (UTC)
- I thank the people after voting, no matter if I win or not. Because a person who bothers to vote for me, I HAVE to thank him! Or her. Anyways, thanks again for voting for me! -- 13:53, November 23, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks for pointing out the "inconsistency", I don't know how I managed to miss it! I fixed the little slip-up. It's great to collab with you on the Herman Cain article, I hope someone picks up the Pee Review soon. It still could be polished a bit, I'll look at it. Feel free to huff/modify parts I wrote if you can come up with something better. Grammar is not my forte. It would be great to feature him while his gaffes are kinda fresh. And I was against having new admins at first, but since it's you and BF, I think it's great, I hope they op both of you, you're both fair and very calm when it comes to drama. Mattsnow 03:31, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Oh, hell seeing the state of VFH, I'd be tempted to nom Herman Cain right now, but I want to get your approval first. Waddya think? Mattsnow 07:16, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- I have added a few more lines. It's topical and it isn't just abuse so could have a good chance on VFH. I was reminded of Danny Glover looking at Cain, they are of the same age. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 12:10, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- So do you say we nom it now? I'm all for! Mattsnow 12:30, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Give it a go. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 20:20, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Ok, I'll give creds to Socky and to MM. They helped us and I am not about to split it like a pizza. We did it together. Mattsnow 20:26, November 26, 2011 (UTC)
Looks like I came back just in time to see you oppeded, so I just wanted to say congrats you deserve it! —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 04:29, 1 December 2011 (UTC)
- This ends the point I can trust you I'm afraid, damned sysops >_< ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 04:30, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Muffins and a badge, discounts at Harrods (unspecified), blind date with Nicole Scherzinger, Tintin's real name..the Uncyclopedia administrators' welcome pack was interesting to say the least. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:24, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Congratulations Emperator! ~ 15:23, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Yes, congratulations Romartus! If you have any questions or concerns, I suggest you come on IRC and talk to one of us other admins (or obviously you could also ask on one of our talkpages). -- The Zombiebaron 16:00, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Why thank you Mordillo and Zombiebaron. Do I need an apron, compass and a set square as well as I understand the initiation rites for admins are a more rigorous than the masons, mossad and the boy scouts. Or have I been misinformed? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 17:13, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Have they told you about the gerbils yet? ~ 17:14, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Fire and water, slings and arrows, ying and yang pandas - done those. But gerbils...oh....the Riddle of the Sphincter. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 17:37, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
You have become strong with the force...[edit source]
And you have control of your fear... now release you anger. (also congrats on oppage):)--Sycamore (Talk) 23:13, December 1, 2011 (UTC)
- Thank you Smiley (TV version). I have been recruited to the Uncyclopedian Anger Management Team, probably for age reasons. Ballast perhaps? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 12:26, December 2, 2011 (UTC)
Man why you erase my Kid nation entry? That was some funny stuff!
- If you create an account, I can restore it to your user page. Also, you must sign your posts. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:11, December 7, 2011 (UTC)
Umm... Why is SturdyLittleFucker an unacceptable username? It doesn't sound too gross/offensive to me. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 00:16, 10 December 2011
- Any user can use that as extra 'nickname' - I have seen it done but not as their contributor name in my view. I asked Lyrithya before about acceptable and unacceptable names. Anyway I have only banned the name, not the user. They can pick another. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 00:19, December 10, 2011 (UTC)
- Yeah, I know, but what's so bad about the name? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 00:31, 10 December 2011
- I know I am one of the 'greybeards' on here but I can tolerate people using fuck' in general discussions and such like or as 'WTF'. I am pretty sure I have used WTF somewhere here, as ever, context is important. But to use it idly as your user name? You let one in, then all can do it. I don't know if there is a policy on this but i did ask Lyrithya and I have noted in logs before that other users got banned for their name use by other admins. So that is the 'policy' I am following. In the same way this site doesn't accept bully names to be used either. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 12:14, December 10, 2011 (UTC)
- So this is just about the use of the word "fuck"? I dunno, but I'd only consider that unacceptable for a username when it's outrightly referring to the act of intercourse. If it's just "fucker" used in the meaning of "an unpleasant person", I don't really see the harm. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 12:25, 10 December 2011
- And I don't even understand what's the bad thing about writing 'WTF'. WTF is a funny word. Little fuckers. OMG!!! It`s Cat the Colourful, Jesus Christ!!! 12:28 10 December 2011
- So 'Fuck' is ok but 'Fucked' and 'Fucking' are not OK user names? I just see that leading to an avenue of drama. In the same way this site doesn't allow pornography to be posted or linked to, just a simple rule about not allowing users to have that as a registered name will be a lot easier to 'police'. I had this discussion about the user who calls himself I am worthless shit. I let that one pass for now as that doesn't seem to be an active user. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 12:50, December 10, 2011 (UTC)
- Well, how would a word make a username unacceptable if its meaning isn't inappropriate (i.e. insulting, obscene or offensive)? Also, "fucking" can be used as an intensifier and "I'm fucked" can mean as much as "I'm in trouble". —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:14, 10 December 2011
- In a conversation/chat etc it's fine. To use even as part of your signature is ok I guess as that can be changed according to a user's mood(i.e. the intensifier) but not as the user name. How many times have users changed their mind about a name they have chosen and asked for it to be changed? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 13:37, December 10, 2011 (UTC)
- Not that often, I guess, but how's that relevant? If it's clear the conversations that are had around here are often not family-friendly, and if it's okay to have non-family-friendly nicknames in sigs, why would the usernames have to be family-friendly? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:47, 10 December 2011
- I don't see it as 'family-friendly' as this site is hardly that either if you mean a strict censorious attitude to issues or subject matter. Regards sigs, as long as they are not too big or overtly offensive, they are allowed through. If everyone wants to add 'fuck' to their signatures, that's up to them as there doesn't appear a policy on that either. However I will just suggest that anyone wanting to register as a user with a name like Fuck be encouraged to change it. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:01, December 10, 2011 (UTC)
- I'd be the last person to want to encourage people to register under offensive usernames, but I just think unilaterally banning usernames just because they've got "fuck" in them (and not necessarily in a particularly noteworthy fashion) is a bit much. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:07, 10 December 2011
- I'm a little fucker. Fuckety Fuck Fuck Fuck. 10:56, December 11, 2011 (UTC)
I would recommend a ban longer than three days for the Owl Bandit, as his "contributions" consist entirely of ad hominem vandalism and pointless images (all of which I put on qVFD, check 'em out). ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Wed, Dec 14 '11 1:30 (UTC)
- If he does it again - messing with owls - then I can assure you it will be lot longer. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:02, December 14, 2011 (UTC)
You Killed it While it was down![edit source]
I was writing a decent article about Lady Mondegreen (to replace the poorly planned and very not-funny version I put up earlier while drunk). By the time I had a lot of it planned and written, you deleted it. The night before [on IRC], I tried to have an admin find and move the article to my user space, since I posted it before knowing what I was doing. Instead, I was just told to add a construction template to it. I do believe that Uncyclopedia needs a nice long article made up entirely of Mondegreens, so I'd like to have some reasonable response from you before continuing. I preserved the article and added it to my user space.
- First sign your posts. Secondly, don't write drunk unless your name is F. Scott Fitzgerald or Dylan Thomas. The idea is good and you now have a copy on your user space. Work on it there. Also, don't turn it into one long list as we have by-laws here about that approach. Good luck! --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:26, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Very good! I will write my article as best I can in my own space, then later submit it for review. I am new to dealing with wiki Editing, so please consider the first version an honest mistake. Eketek 10:32, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- No problem. If you have other questions, drop a message here. There is also an adoption policy for newcomers which will help if you run into any other issues on this wiki. It's like having a Guardian Angel. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:44, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- I want my guardian angel to occasionally take a shot at my neck -- it will keep things interesting. Eketek 12:50, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- I do intend to make the article as comprehensible as any Mondegreen (which means not comprehensible, unless you, for some reason, think in phonics instead of actual words) I am dropping the rambling in favor of simply copying the Wikipedia article, and mangling their words. Eketek 15:33, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Make sure to indent when continuing a conversation so it makes sense. Check on other users pages. I have moved your earlier comment to show you what I mean. However, don't delete comments from other people unless it's blatant abuse/vandalism. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 16:03, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Take the wikipedia article as a starting point but try go off on a comic angle if possible i.e. add things that are certainly not a mondegreen. To be honest, I hadn't even known what the term meant until I checked. You can learn things even here, remarkable though that may be. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 16:06, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
- Don't worry! I'm not producing a "pure" Mondegreen article. I value dirty jokes and clever statements that closely match the original text over something closer. In English, there are lots of fun things you can do with near-homophony! Eketek 14:51, December 21, 2011 (UTC)
Just letting you know that "Voted for deletion" as a deletion reason should normally be reserved for things deleted through VFD[edit source]
A possible exception to which might be joke deletions. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 19:04, 16 December 2011
- Ok thanks Socky. Note made for future reference. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 19:08, December 16, 2011 (UTC)
Mamma mia! You voted for
Italy on
VFH and it was featured!
Thanka youa! -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 12:38, December 18, 2011 (UTC)
Lyrithya tells me it might have something to do with the browser you use. Anyway, could you please add them manually until we figure out what exactly is wrong with the gadget and how it can be fixed? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:52, 18 December 2011
- OK I am using Firefox. I will add the fix ones manually. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:53, December 18, 2011 (UTC)
- Lol, it's war on RC! Can I help? Mattsnow 22:38, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- RC? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 22:41, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- RC as in Recent Changes. It seems a bot or whatever is getting high, can I help is what I meant lol Mattsnow 22:47, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Fire is out. Thanks for the offer Matt. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 23:06, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Just trying to help! When you see I'm online and something occurs, I'll be grateful to help! Remember I totally suck with a pc though, so no 1337 guy here :) Mattsnow 23:23, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- What was it? A bot? Sorry I couldn't be of much help. Mattsnow 23:44, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
use this it's uhhhh... useful :D ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 23:03, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
- Thanks Frosty. I will try it out. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 23:08, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
Tripped face first into a bar[edit source]
Hello Sir Romartus. You can bring class into this collab, which is what it will be missing the most.... This is a note to lots of people, asking them to join into a Walk into a bar collab (and if Iz missed you, you are more than welcome to "Walk into a bar" too!). If you want to join in, make up your best "Walk into a bar" jokes and we will have the bestest "Walk into a bar" page on the innernests! Aleister 16:00 27-12-'11
- I had a look but I will let others contribute. Thanks Al. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 17:46, December 27, 2011 (UTC)
- Romartus walks into a walk into a bar page. And walks out again. Thus lowering the quality of the page by one level of quality. I'm crying in my beer. And when I'm done crying into this beer I'll cry into the next one. Aleister 17:59 27-12-'11
- Americans cry and the English twitch the upper lip. Waterworks are for the utility companies unless you prefer Ready Salted Beer! Just ask Alice when you're ten feet tall. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 18:23, December 27, 2011 (UTC)
Why you had NO reason to delete my template.[edit source]
Y'know, it's a shame that your an admin and you need to be reminded of your false actions. I see that you deleted the template I made, which was, ytplus. And summarized the action, like this.
“Fails QA. Read the beginner's guide and HTBFANJS”
What you are to lazy to realize, is that Ytplus was a code that's there for the sole-purpose of embedding YouTube videos, on the Uncyclopedia website."It wasn't for any, deliberate humor". I thought I could help out the website by, adding more features to it. What you need to do is, to look over some templates, and figure out their meaning before, you could jump to conclusions as to disprove/deleting them..
The pages you included were based on articles, about topics. My template wasn't being a topic. My template, once again, was just for the sole-purpose of, enabling embedding of YouTube videos..-EminamaDron2 05:04, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Users adding/creating their own templates in main space is not acceptable unless they run the idea in a forum or ask an admin first. This is to stop a proliferation of templates which have before clogged up this site. A template is only useful if other users like and use them. That is why I suggest you take this to a forum to gauge opinion from others here. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:52, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- I moved the template into your userspace at User:EminamaDron2/Template:Ytplus, where you can keep it or work on it or whatever. The gist of what m friend here says is right, we try to keep templates to a minimum nowadays, and though as a format template it seems harmless, it should also be considered how frequently it would be used. You mention it's borrowed from ED, where youtubes and accompanying huge block quotes are quite commonplace, but I simply don't see how a template specific for that type of formatted article would be too helpful on this wiki. I disagree when he says you should go to the forums about it, though. Such measures should only be considered when the stakes are much higher. -- TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 09:57, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Thanks TKF for the clarification. I asked RAHB on IRC earlier about this. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 09:59, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
I know the Al Pacino article is not funny, I am just using it as a template it is not even mine, it is from a mirror site![edit source]
So if you would be kind enough good sir, I would like you to move it to my user space, if you have the time, [lie you half Jewish Irish grouchy goon (I think you are from somewhere around the UK), don't know why. Parabolictangent 13:45, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Ok. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 13:47, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
If I am not intruding was my guess anywhere near accurate? And I know this is rather frivolous. But please it is an odd quirk, but do not answer in just one word, at least to me it for some odd reason irks me. Sorry if it annoyed you. Parabolictangent 13:52, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Try and make it good can you? Make it a worthy misinformation article, Al deserves that at least. Remember he is trying to leave the business ..Just when I thought I was out... they pull me back in.... You are correct about the UK location but nothing else. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 13:59, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Ok it is now at User:Parabolictangent/Al_Pacino. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:10, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
Um, sorry to bother you again[edit source]
But working on 2 or 3 articles at the same time isn't a bannable offense. It's certainly undesirable when a user creates article after article, never finishing any of them, but I don't think the user you recently banned was a blatant example of that. Even when you suspect a user is going to litter the wiki with unfinished articles, I'd still advise to contact the user in question on his talkpage before resorting to bans. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:12, 28 December 2011
- If that was the only problem but they were also not signing their posts properly either despite warnings, over pasting a page (Battle of Hastings), adding a questionable link from Klaus Kinski to their own fictional film...the list was extending. As regards half starting articles and leaving them in the main space, I think I have only ever did that with one story at a time as I was aware it was frowned upon to start and then not finishing articles in the main space. I know we have the Lindsay Lohan article in that state but that is acting more like a space filler/blocker to prevent another user-vandal coming up with crap in the area. Since you have asked me Socky, I will remove the bans for now and watch what they do next. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 16:56, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Many thanks Socky. For posterity, we only moved on because Romartus convinced us to remove our original page and cobble the content into the Battle of Hastings, (something we didn't want to do as we thought our parody stood well on it's own and it seemed wasteful to alter a reasonable article). When we did as he asked he, he reversed our work and said we should edit instead. Exasperated, we decided to work on what was a blank page, European Union, as we felt less restricted by his you must only reference real things such as Chuck Norris and Judi Dench rule. With the EU, there was a chance we might write something he knew about. We accept the risks and realise it may be safer to stick with New Jersey and other hilarious US parochialisms.
- Romartus, all I can say is, much like the Roman Empire, cracks are beginning to form. Your reign of tyranny may be short lived, I hope you packed your sandals. Please could you ban on an individual basis in future. It doesn't seem fair to lump us together. Best --Zarathustrauk 17:31, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
- Who be this Royal We thou speakest of? Romartus has reigned by terror for years now, and has chased away so many users since 2007 (the best one was when he had a guy review History of Great Britain, the guy lasted two hours and was never heard of again) that you could fill up a team of rugby players with them and still have some left to carry water. So please don't leave because of this guy, this Romartus character. He has been chastised and ignored for years now, but you, of royalty it seems, can help us build this website to its former greatness (pre-Romartus). Aleister 17:38 28-12-'11
- Yes if you really miss Chuck Norris, those were indeed the days made sweet by the Golden Girls. Also Gentlehug11, SIGN YOUR POSTS and whilst you at it, create a user page and sig. People can't post messages on your page to ask questions. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 18:08, December 28, 2011 (UTC)
Can you delete the "{{expansion}}" tag?
Thanks, --Iseepeepee 14:43, December 29, 2011 (UTC)
- Hmmm...are all the syntax, grammatical errors deliberate for HowTo:Get a Blue Screen of Death? Still looks like a stub. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:49, December 29, 2011 (UTC)
Greetings, Romartus, Orator of Rome and Purveyor of Deviant History. You voted for me on POTM for November. Now, obviously it's been a while since this happened. However, I figured that, while it can be too late to ask for forgiveness, it is never too late to give thanks.
Once again, thank you, and my apologies for not thanking you sooner. This impersonal, auto-generated message will self-destruct in 5 seconds. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Wed, Jan 4 '12 11:35 (UTC)
Hi, thanks for not immediately banning me once you discovered that I have no life.
I am tremendously OCD about usernames and passwords, so I never lose them. I usually only come to uncyclopedia when I'm really depressed or psychotically murderous. Either way, I can't comment on the effectiveness of my writing.
My lawyer said so.
Anyway, see you in court!
--Ajhuncyc 14:19, January 4, 2012 (UTC)
I have gone through my records and it appears as though you may have voted for me for some award, supported one or more of my articles on VFH, or supported one or more of my images on VFP, in the past year or so. If this is not the case, then please ignore this message. Otherwise, thank you for your support. May you have a long and fruitful life, and have many parasites. 1234 ~ 18:57, 6 January 2012
Thanks for sparing me[edit source]
Good Dear Sir Romartus the Right, Acute, UnObtuse, Reflex, Straight (here I'm referring to the various types of angles), UnGay, and Hono(u)rable:
Phew, that was a huge exaggeration.
Thank you for sparing me (i.e. lifting the block). In order to avoid further conflict with Chuck Norris, I have resolved to create all of my new articles within my userspace (i.e. as subpages of User:68.173.113.106). Nowhere else. Eventually, I will mainspace them, but only if they pass HTBFANJS.
Happy 2012!
Out of 110% submission only, but sincerely thine,
68.173.113.106 03:01, January 8, 2012 (UTC), the Rightful Heir to the Order of Arceus
P.S. Is this post funny? If it is, please notify me on my talk page. If it is not, please notify me on my talk page, remove this post, and block me for "Be1ng a n00b c0m3d1an" for no more than one second. (That was a joke.)
- Dear 68.173.whatever, please don't create articles in your "userspace" because you are not a user. Register an account. -- TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 03:04, January 8, 2012 (UTC)
- As my colleague reminds you, if you register an account (i.e. log in with a user name and password) then you can create your own user pages to start off an article. This avoids having stuff deleted in the main space if it fails for quality reasons or remains a stub/unfinished. Also sign all comments and format them to the 'house style' you see here. Finally as a general piece of advice to all noobs, avoid dickery,drama and activities that suggest you are here for trolling. The 'my brother has used my account for that last message' has been used before by those who were later banned for vandalism. Ok? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:30, January 8, 2012 (UTC)
- I was trying to be funny. Besides, I will be on wikibreak for a while. Sayonara! 68.173.113.106 03:08, January 15, 2012 (UTC)
That's just for new articles (under a week old). If someone's repeatedly removing a fix tag, however, that in of itself is more than sufficient reason to ban them, but it looks like you found even more cause to ban the one I'm thinking of. So... yeah. Tacos. 1234 ~ 19:45, 10 January 2012
- Ah..yes. Thanks for reminding me. ZB reminded me that ICU wasn't for old crap. I was trying to be reasonable with the recent author of Uzbekistan but the clue was in the user name wasn't it? Thanks Lyth. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 19:51, January 10, 2012 (UTC)
- Good, good. You're such a lovely one, you know. 1234 ~ 17:00, 11 January 2012
The article on Pakistan in your userspace is now passable. However, today MadMax restored the original Pakistan back to the 2006 version. Please decide which one you prefer and/or synch with him. Spıke ¬ 00:16 13-Jan-12
- Hi Spike. I had a look at the original. I think a mashed up marriage can be arranged between the two but with improvements. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:42, January 13, 2012 (UTC)
User:Provincia di Gela[edit source]
Huh? Just looked like some guy's userpage. It was in another language but there's no law against that for the userspace. -- TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 08:21, January 13, 2012 (UTC)
- OK I will restore it. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:28, January 13, 2012 (UTC)
- I had another look. This appears to be a page from Italian wikipedia pasted onto this site as I can't detect any humour
here there (! Freudian typo?). So I don't think this is a real user. I have restored it and the talk page per request. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:38, January 13, 2012 (UTC)
Can you check Cesare Borgia now? I tried to clean it up and added some images.
--Sarbriel 01:40, January 15, 2012 (UTC)
- OK will do. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:49, January 15, 2012 (UTC)
- I have made some changes but I haven't gone beyond the second paragraph as I now realise this is more about the game rather than the actual Cesare Borgia. Hence all this business with white hooded assassins, 'apples' (?) etc. So where is the humour going to come from this approach? Should the article make fun of the game or be a parodic version of Cesare Borgia's life?? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 11:28, January 15, 2012 (UTC)
It is more oriented towards his life as shown within game.
- P.S. Don't forget to sign your posts. I have had another look. The humour of this article really depends on a reader being familiar with the game (Assassins Creed) to make sense of it. So that was why I was asking about apples and assassins. Since I don't know the game, I feel my edits would take you away from what you are trying to achieve here. Is it to make fun of the game or the real Cesare Borgia with a spoof biography? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 13:19, January 19, 2012 (UTC)
Is this about that comedy actor? I don't get it. Anyway, why don't you fix and edit and polish what needs fixing and editing and polishing on this page. Might as well. Aleister 00:36 20-1-'12
- I admit...I don't know who you are talking about Al. Titus was an emperor, I don't know about the comedy actor. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 09:10, January 20, 2012 (UTC)
- He had a show. It was pretty funny, pretty 90s and gave off some Malcolm in the Middle-ish vibes, but for an adult-er audience. -- TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 09:12, January 20, 2012 (UTC)
- Yeah, it was a real dark comedy about a Roman general, name of Titus Andronicus, being accidentally transported to the year 2000 through a tear in space-time. Every episode, a different person got their head cut off with a spatha, to the sound of a slide-whistle. But, maaan, was Cynthia Watros HAWT in that linen chiton, or what? ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Jan 20 '12 14:52 (UTC)
- I am enlightened. Thank you. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 18:54, January 20, 2012 (UTC)
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)[edit source]
Move "People's Republic of Iran" back to "Persia". The redirect is simply retarded and put in by a moron named IAmMahdi whose name suggests affilations to the dictators and Mullahs in iran. This new tiltle for the page "people's republic of Iran", is not only not funny it's simply stupid... Move back to Persia!
CLICK HERE--ShabiDOO 10:19, January 24, 2012 (UTC)
- I will see if I can come up with a place holder article for the Persia page. The Peoples Republic of Iran story isn't that good, thanks to Mahdi but that would require an extensive overhaul. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 07:14, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
Thank you,
I will see if i can copy/move some of the non-retarded elements from this page (PRoI) back into Persia; Mainly stuff I personally myself had placed on the original Persia page over the years... I would like these stuff put back under persia because that was my original intent and having under this new name just makes no sense...
Thanks again for bringing Persia page back to life from the depths of "redirect"!!!
I think I improved it, I added a bit of content from Wikipedia and removed the red links. If you agree, please remove the ICU tag. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 08:32, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
- OK. Done. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:34, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
- Romartus, can I call you Romy? I wrote this on the VFH. Could you give me a little more info, details, suggestions for your against vote? Is it the tone? A bit of bad grammar (im bad at it and no ones gone over this one) etc? The thing at the end...you don't dig the working for us part? Or the fine print? Any feed back is very appreciated as this one is my baby and I'd like it to be good good good when its featured! --ShabiDOO 19:15, January 27, 2012 (UTC)
- I was moving to abstain as though I thought the article had some good ideas, the writing just seemed a bit loose and could have done with a tighter edit. The reason I went for an against vote was the disclaimer part could have been drastically cut. However, as it is part of the article, you are obliged to read it. I went through that bit and besides a few spelling mistakes, my view was that it didn't add anything to the article by being absurd or stupid in its own right. So you could have reduced it to a few lines with 'etc..etc..' --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:48, January 28, 2012 (UTC)
- Alright. Thanks. Any help would be appreciated in edits, are you talking about grammar? or un needed text? As for the small print, I wont cut it, but Ill find a way to make it seem less lame. I suppose ending reading an article by not reading the last of the text because you know what it is seems stupid. Good point! --ShabiDOO 12:44, January 28, 2012 (UTC)
Thanks for deleting my Ricer article that I had been working on since 2006, with no chance for negotiation or recourse. Cheers.----Little Jimmy 07:54, January 28, 2012 (UTC)
- If you want it back, it will be restored to your user page but don't move it to main space unless improved. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:36, January 28, 2012 (UTC)
- Putting aside my previous petty sarcasm, that would be great idea. It'll allow me to keep on working at and, essentially, remove the bullshit bits from it. I've submitted it it to pee review before and it was well received, bt apparantly that wasn't enough. --Little Jimmy 07:06, January 30, 2012 (UTC)
- Now at User:Little_Jimmy/Ricer . --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 09:10, January 30, 2012 (UTC)
I'd wash your car. Thank you for your vote on the James Bevel page, very appreciated. Your vote is like the golden hair spun by golden spiders here. Aleister 2:58 1-2-'12
Hello. I put the following update on the walk into a bar collab. The intent of this was to have uncyclopedia have the best original walk into a bar page on the innernests, and to edit it in some form or other like a collab. Everyone's invited, I just can't spam more than a few pages with invites or an admin will yank my chain (if I'm lucky), so please come and join in. Thanks. Aleister 17:35 2-2-'12
- The update: The call for original Walk into a bar stories continues, as many good writers and others are doing this page justice. It may take weeks or months to get it in shape. Please add your best original 'Walk into a bar' story either here or on the talk page. Please polish the joke or story enough so that you are happy with it. Can we make the best Walk into a bar page on the innernests? Maybe, and that would be fun. So please improve this page with your best and brighest.
- I flicked over and had a look. If anything comes to mind, or hand, or foot, I will punt it over at the article. As for structure, perhaps more of a grouping would work. Don't know as yet. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 19:12, February 2, 2012 (UTC)
I'm back and ready to better comedic tastes. General Eisenhower 01:10, February 3, 2012 (UTC)
- Welcome back General. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:09, February 3, 2012 (UTC)
How was that not funny and HTBFANJS ???
YOU do not think it is funny and delete it. At least have a discussion about it before deleting it.
That is kind fascists and a dick move.
OU do not think it is funny and delete it. At least have a discussion about it before deleting it.
- Well hello there. It was a list and not an article. If you create a user page and discussion page, articles that are being worked on can be sent there. Also can you sign your posts? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:10, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- Oh you do have a page. OK let me know if you want move to restore your article and move it to your pages for more work. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 14:52, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
I replied on my talk page, but copy pasta in case you didn't follow it:
I don't doubt for a minute it was awful, I didn't read it. I was right in the middle of chatting while making coffee and playing ping-pong at the same time. Multitasking lol Mattsnow 02:14, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- Just read the prior message, and he's not happy. Oh, well, I kinda side with him: we are deleting too many articles. Example:
- I'm a reader who would like to read about a particular band in a funny way. There's no article here (because it's been deleted for not having a Shakespear prose or being too listy) : I never come back again.
- I am a new user who gets his article deleted thanks to a freaking fix tag, or I get an ICU shoved in my face without even a message to explain.
In both cases, I'd say goodbye to Uncy. Stop that deleting madness, Besides, did you know that redirects count as articles? MadMax spawns like 10 a day, and he's doing a good job: sadly, this situation causes people to be paranoid about bad articles taking over, but nothing is further from the truth: most bad new articles are dealt with swiftly with QVFD and ICUs. Please argue with me, as I am always ready to joke, but I feel strongly about this: we are really going the wrong path here. Mattsnow 02:32, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- Just ban him, which will shut him up for awhile. I just red link fixed a link to San Francisco. If we could just huff the really really bad pages, that would be very good, yet in the Forest Fire Fiasco people were putting huff tags on pages at a rate of 10 a minute (some FIX tags are going up 10 a minute now), so suddenly the wiki is swiss-cheesed with red links and some pages I liked are gone, and I feel like Little Richard trying to find a way to carry a tune. Check out Maniac's page on Wilt Chamberlain for a list of people he had sex with, and he seems to have had sex with red links all over the world. Aleister 2:47 7-2-'12
- Forest Fire Fiasco sounds right. Who won the Huffer of the Month contest? Sooooo prestigious... Mattsnow 03:02, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
{{uw-notfunny}} 1234 ~ 04:28, 7 February 2012
- They've ready said stuff, so I'll say different stuff. I stayed here and edited because I read stuff and thought "I can do better". Admittedly, Pawn shop and Care bears still suck, but I got better. Crap articles on the right topics can encourage people to improve them. Deleted articles don't. And any user here who reads a bad article is usually happy to rewrite without concern that we're going over bad stuff. We are too delete happy. Pup 09:24 07 Feb '12
- I appreciate three regular users coming to my page to voice concern about the deletion policy. There won't be a position where we are all going to agree on what is a good/bad or binable article. The only problem is to where to draw a line. I understand the argument that everyone's first article is usually crap (there have been exceptions) and that deleting that or leaving a 'Fix This in 7 Days Or Else' notice may have discouraged a lot of people from returning. My own view that after a couple of months working as an admin, about 3-4 new users (judging by their contributions) a month look promising new contributors. Also how they react to fix tags, comments or ideas can also be a good marker. I also try and talk to new users with articles that look to me to have great promise. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 15:35, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- If only Chuck Berry were here to sing with us, but I think the main concern is not new people's pages as much as already established pages being huffed with little thought. Zzaardvark was on both the VFD and Forest Flamer list, and only keen eyed Froggies saved it onc the last one. Too many good pages are stuck with FIX tags, and I for two don't feel like checking every one of the hundreds of the list, all vital articles. Aleister 15:44 7-2-'12
Fix Tags (not ICUS) are a bit of an issue. We need purgatory. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 15:49, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- You make sense, Romartus. I know you read the arguments through. I agree very much that some articles suck incredibly, but why not go through VFD an QVFD and ICUs? I know you are warning new users that their articles are on the brink of death, for I've seen you do it. I think we can agree that new users don't seem to read the welcome message, and it is frustrating to repeat it. But that fix tag, as opposed to ICUS and VFD, is quite radical. I mean, are you in the know and I'm not that we need to reduce bandwith? Thank you for your kind response, Romartus, we don't want to raise drama, we care about this wiki, which is personally my only entertainment when I work in hellholes nowhere like I do. Nothing on the net comes close. Mattsnow 16:00, February 7, 2012 (UTC)
- It is probably unlikely Uncyclopedia will ever be a smooth read for anyone who comes stumbling across the site. I think in the last four years the articles submitted and added to this site have improved an enormous amount compared to what was appearing back in 2005. The gap therefore between what was acceptable (or even featured) has also changed too. The downside for some is that sheer nonsense has been relegated or housed by illogicopedia or simply deleted through lack of interest. This has still left a large collection of articles that are not desperately bad to deserve death but also need of some TLC. Like many regular users, I housing a few strays in my 'kennels' (i.e. Paraguay) for the day I can apply shampoo, rinse and a haircut to make it at least reasonably funny without any expectation of featuring. So I understand when people stumble across a poor article and want to take time to improve it but, unless any of the current user base in currently serving a prison life sentence, often Real World issues intrude and a job is not completed. I have tried to gee up other writers for work I think has great promise and helped to bring that work to completion. My recent intervention with Mithriasm being a case in point and though I don't think the finished work has quite got it right for featuring, at least it was completed and won't be deleted. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 10:21, February 11, 2012 (UTC)
Hi, the article was copy/pasted from some site which I thought was an uncyclopedia mirror. Go ahead and delete that pile of crap if it pleases your honor. Pewfly 16:10, February 11, 2012 (UTC)
- OK. Thank you. There is an uncyclopedia mirror but is has become a rogue site and haven for vandalism as the owner (Carlb) has disapppeared. This is the real McCoy. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 18:54, February 11, 2012 (UTC)
So you're an admin now[edit source]
When did that happen? What else has been happening since I was gone?--- TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 08:01, February 13, 2012 (UTC)
- It happened in December 2011. Black Flamingo was also given the extra stripes to his uniform. I hadn't realised you had been gone that long but try and stick to your manifesto and see what happens. Despite appearances, there are a few adults on this website. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 08:07, February 13, 2012 (UTC)