User talk:Under user/Archive 19

#ape!

I did an admin! Yay! Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 13:05 June 3 '09

You changed your timestamp! Shame on you! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 28:69, 33 February 3227 (UTC)

Shh! Dont tell anyone! Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 13:10 June 3 '09

Grape!

A nice little picture for added effect.

Archiving your talkpage in the middle of a conversation? Shame on you! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:06, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Sock, when I say don't use that word, I am very fucking serious. --UU - natter 13:09, Jun 3

Well, I forgot to read your edit summary. Shame on me! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:13, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

I say it every time. Anyway, you only got a free minute to scratch your nose and look wistfully out of the curtains at that girl across the road, so what's the problem? ;-) --UU - natter 13:16, Jun 3

No problem really, she looked hot by the way. I'll remember that for the next time. *wink* *wink* —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:19, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

sniff

You just didn't want to talk to me anymore. that's it isn't it? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 13:07 3 June 2009

I thought you were off to slaughter zombies or whatever, so that seemed like an opportune juncture... --UU - natter 13:09, Jun 3

Yeah I was. But then I noticed you archived. Also:

Really? Why? It was easily my worst feature last month. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 14:29 3 June 2009

I'm sure I've mentioned somewhere at least once that humour is subjective. Those are my opinions, and as we all know, they are always right. Looking at my votes and how well most of those articles are doing, looks like not many other people are as right as me... --UU - natter 14:54, Jun 3

Yeah but you could be more right. It's ok, kinda glad at least somebody likes my why? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:06 3 June 2009

On another note

Could I take care of the Why? features together with the HowTo's I'm already doing? Its main page has been static for some time now. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:25, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

I don't see why not. --UU - natter 13:30, Jun 3

Oh thanks. Also, look here. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:31, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

IDK Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 13:35 June 3 '09

Youre my idol

Hamboozoo Lawi Boozoo want to say sank you, ya otta!

You gived your voice to make za interfiew on za front page. So I want to say sank you... Want to see my brobelor? I also take you to za byramids and show you good time, and for you only 10 American dollars. No, wait! Come back! I want money! What do I tell to little Ahmad when he says ya baba, get food?...

Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 21:39 June 3 '09

Thanks

Thanks for the help. Ill get used to this. -Skutter 10:22, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

s-s-signpost

you bugger! that story hadn't even cooled off properly and you were fixing the spelling already! haha thanks. you think you'll add a story, or shall i try to round it off? i'm managing to outsmart my employer's internet filter for the time being, but don't be surprised if i get cut off mid-sentence. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:27, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Heh, I happened to be passing, and couldn't resist. I was intending to sort out this week's issue after work tonight, while Mrs UU's out and so can't object to me spending too much time on the internet. (Considering how I could be spending that time, you'd think she'd be happy!) But if you have a good idea, go for it, as my idea is currently to wait for blatant last-second panic to spark the creative process. Nice to see you, BTW. --UU - natter 13:30, Jun 4

sounds good, my cheery chum. i'm satisfied with writing the one article. let me know if you want me to add any flannel. i hope to be not-as-inactive as i believed was necessary, but i suppose only time will tell. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:35, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Actually, I think I may have the perfect subject for a lead article: [1]. Do you wanna have fun with this, or are you happy to wait until I get home and unleash the full fury of my boredom on it? --UU - natter 13:37, Jun 4

well facebook is blocked by an impenitrable barrier here at my lovely place of employment, so i say: have at it, UU! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 14:07, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Delivery

I've been trying to get this bot working, but it won't work on my computer for some reason. From what I hear, it should be pretty easy. I got some information on Sannse's talkpage. The AutoWikiBrowser seems to be the way to go. It has a guide on Wikipedia. And Charitwo made a config file for delivering the UnSignpost. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:38, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Alternatively, you can ask Charitwo to deliver it on IRC. If he's willing. He's usually around. I need to go now. See ya later. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:41, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Sorry, stole your job this week. You gotta be quick, Sock! Saberwolf116 01:49, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

So UU, are you gonna give this bot thing a try? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:49, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

UU? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 20:36, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost June 4th, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

May contain traces of humor!

June 4th, 2009 • Issue 50 • I love the smell of news in the morning!

Todd not Lionised by all? By UU Uncyclopedia's long-cherished status as the worst was given a massive fillip this week with the discovery that genial admin Todd Lyons has his own Facebook hate group. This considerable accomplishment has to be considered among the highest praise ever bestowed on an admin of this wiki. Kosher kvetcher Mordillo even opined that it makes him the #1 admin on the wiki, as "even Mhaille doesn't have a hate group!" Lyons himself was deeply touched by the tribute, exclusively telling the USP: "I'm a bit surprised (though not touched, like the WotM nomination this month), because I generally shy away from the snappy/nasty ban summaries that would guarantee me a spot in the UnSignpost. Really, RDB is my #1 pick for this, and richly deserves to have a hate group on Facebook (if not several dozen by now). :) Second, if I had any insecurities that I'd lost my touch with the ban hammer after being on hiatus, they're gone. The arm's feeling great. The surgery seems to have been a 100% success. I'm feeling good that I'll be able to finish out the season and hopefully garner some interest as a bureaucrat when I become a free agent this fall." The group's creator was unavailable for comment, probably due to being banned. Comings and Goings By Gerrycheevers As you may or may not have noticed, there recently seems to be a flurry of returns and hiatuses (hiati?) on this silly wiki that some of us like to call Uncyclopedia. This could be due to a number of things: the end of the school year and thus the end of studying and finals; the summer season causing new and strange emotions in internet comedy writers; the revolving door recently installed at the Uncyclopedia headquarters. Regardless of the reason, those returning have been 'welcomed', and those leaving have been warned that their userpages will be mercilessly vandalized should their vacation extend overly long. Popular aquatic creature user Finnius claims to have returned. His contributions since returning have thus far been limited to announcing his return in the forum (as required by Uncyclopedia Bylaw #435), but the Unsignpost is confident of a return laced with quality pee and other, less pungent useful contributions. The elusive Cajek, a mythical creature once thought to exist only in the surreal dreams of squirrels, has returned gloriously upon the back of a giant squirrel. So at least some part of the myth was true. Take that, science! Other returns include Dexter111344 after a brief hiatus and Gouncyclopedia!, who evaded a years-long block to announce his return in the forums (UB435 again). Perhaps the most noted of all, faithful new dog Dognewspaper returns from a one-month hiatus to appear in this story. Other users have seen a decline or all-out drop-off in their contribution level. SysRq remains on an indefinite hiatus. Gerrycheevers has seen his number of edits dwindle as of late. MrN9000 is still among the missing. Codeine is apparently gone as well, and Necropaxx will be losing his precious internet. We bid these users to hurry back, lest their userpages and works be smited with the hammer of pointless vandalism.

Check out these pages! Image spam Another one bites the dust Admin competence? From our logs: 01:08, 3 June 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 24.8.59.236 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (So far you've edited the pages 'your mom' and 'school'. Want me to try and guess your age?) 07:46, 2 June 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 203.17.189.150 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (bored fuckes should go fuck boards. It's too early in the morning and I can't think of anything smart to say) 20:04, 30 May 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 174.117.160.23 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (Cyberbullying: we don't want to hear about people you know and why you want to suck their dick. I know that's not quite what you said, but something about what you said implied it) 20:38, 29 May 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) blocked Da Wizard Of Oz (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (PLEASE MASSUH WHIP ME, OH MAH GOD, I'M GETTIN' SO HOT, I'LL SUCK YO DICK!!!!!!) Biopic of the Week The very Reverend Zim ulator is the undisputed, acknowledged, and slightly puce master of UnNews. As such, reporting about him in a newspaper may be an act of such metaphysical self-referentialism that it creates a negative feedback loop, destroying the universe, or at least this wiki. But, in the name of bringing Zim's name to our readership, that's a risk we're willing to take. We'd normally link to a bunch of stuff he's done at this point, but just take a look at UnNews - as we mentioned, he's basically the guy who keeps it all tickin'. Rats off to ya, Zim! Old School Featured Article of the Week In a week when Obama is trying to reach out to the Muslim community, perhaps it is an apt time to consider how far he is going to have to reach. Will he ever be able to bridge the gap all the way to the readership of American Fundie Magazine? "The magazine for "True Christians™", was formed to cater to the needs of the modern biblical fundamentalist", and is just as relevant today as it was way back in 2006. VFD kept article of the week Plan 11 from Outer Space has been referred to as "amusing", "pretty funny" and "hilarious". Go see why people thought it worth having around.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

Delievered by Saberwolf116 01:50, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Request

Could you semi-protect Snakes on a Plane? IPs vandalized it over a long period of time, and I don't want em' to get to this early 08' version I reverted it too. Saberwolf116 14:24, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Romartus

I guess I don't have the same magic touch you do. Romartus is giving me lip about his reviewing style. Maybe it's because my name is "BAN MAGNET" and the first thing you see on my page is a button to ban me XD But whatever the cause, it seems he would be willing to listen to you...   Le Cejak • <15:57 Jun 05, 2009>

Polite Message

I know you're aware of my plea on the forum. I don't mean to be a dick or anything, and I honestly don't care that much about having a two-sentence bio. I understand you're busy, and can certainly sympathize (I got back from work just recently myself, and have an interview lined up for a second job--yeah, paying for college is fun). It's more the principle of the thing than actually getting any recognition. Sometimes it seems like half the admins here are more concerned with leaving ten-cent one-liners on forum pages than they are with actually, you know, doing their fucking jobs, ya know? Being a fairly old-school guy, this bothers me. Don't think I'm attacking you--I'm not--there's a big fucking difference between being too busy with your actual life to write some totally irrelevant thing, and being incompetent and/or lazy. In regards to my actual request--do it whenever you get around to it. If you're busy, I understand--I'm not going to ask you to subordinate your life to my petty request. So long as you don't have your head up your ass, it really doesn't matter to me. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 04:08, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Rightyho, I'm done. And now I'll discharge various other admin-ly responsibilities before getting back to doing more unpaid extra work from home. On a sunday. Sheesh! As to the admins doing their jobs thing - you have to strike a balance a bit, because just doing the job would stop this place being so fun, to the point where we lose another admin. I'm pretty sure that's what lost us a bunch of other really good people. And on the whole, I think we still do a pretty decent job around here. Now, back to that forum, as I'm going to raise a question. --UU - natter 08:31, Jun 7

You should use that speach when your boss find out about Uncyc. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 14:25 7 June 2009

I think Guildy, that if you look more closely at the admins around here and their history you'll find out that there are no lazy or incompetent admins. Only burned out admins. ~ 14:36, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Agreed. I'm sure we could all toss in our two cents about what really keeps us busy but I'm sure we do what we can, when we're around. I've recently completed graduate school while working part-time and still being a married guy with several young children to care for. During that period, I was (understandably) a non-entity here. Presently, school is done but the other responsibilities remain... but I'm making any effort I can. To that end, I did make a point to update my admin toolkit to ensure that the VFH queue was full this weekend (addressing your complaint from last week). Beyond that, the computer is on in the room, and I check the recent edits every time I pass by. I miss some stuff, but the others help a lot, which gives me time to write a bit and produce three portals this week.  :) So, do cut us some slack. We're all trying our best. --T. (talk) 14:55, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

I didn't mean to insinuate that all you admin-folk are incompetent--certainly not. And I can definitely relate to the "responsiblities" and "burned out" things, so yeah. All of you have yourselves nice days. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:13, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Just wondering, why dont the ancient admins here just pass the torch to a newer and fresher generation of admins, you know, revitalizing this wiki? I know, you ancient admins are getting so fucking bored, so why doesnt everyone of you choose a successor and hand him his adminship?... Just saying, I know it wont happen anyway. Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 16:57 June 7 '09

Yeah, I can see how that'd really help. --UU - natter 16:59, Jun 7

I was not kidding, by the way. Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:13 June 7 '09

You... weren't? --UU - natter 17:37, Jun 7

Ofcourse, I was kidding.. Sir Admin-for-life :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:39 June 7 '09

You... were? --UU - natter 17:41, Jun 7

I... don't know? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:43 June 7 '09

You... don't? --UU - natter 17:45, Jun 7

You... drunk? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:47 June 7 '09

You... do? --UU - natter 17:50, Jun 7

We... can? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 17:52 June 7 '09

You... Jane? --UU - natter 17:53, Jun 7

All kidding (or not) aside, I think that the suggestion that the ancient admins here are bored and holding back the revitalization of the wiki is just nonsense. Have a gander at what I've done in the last 6 weeks. I'm not bored. I am someone with a full life, who enjoys loaning himself to this site when realistically possible, and this is true of any admin, ancient or not. As far as the torch passing: I was chosen as an admin by the cabal of that age because they watched what I did and decided I was a good risk. I think that web of trust has worked well over the years, and we've just kept adding additional heads as-needed by consensus. I already know who my pick will be for the next in line, but I won't be appointing anyone. I'm happy with the choices that have been made by the group in my absence, and with the current operation of the site. The mix of old and new adminship here is extremely healthy. We've got broad administrative experience and varied styles, but a shared goal and much mutual respect for each other as we do this job each day. --T. (talk) 17:59, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

You... are utterly on the nail there, old chap. --UU - natter 18:01, Jun 7

I wanna be an admin! I'd be so good at it. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:45 7 June 2009

Adoption

Someone did the mistake of calling you a gentleman when I asked for recommendations for possible adopters. Would you be interested in adopting a misplaced piece of footwear? --LittlePinkSock 20:40, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Gentleman? Ahhh, gentleman... People should be more careful what they call me! Nice to meet you LPS, if you don't mind me abbreviating you in a way that distinguishes you from Socky (who I see you've met). Sure, I've got room to adopt, and I'm generally around, however I will add this caveat: I tend to be here during UK office hours mostly, and UK evening times occasionally. If you're from a significantly different time zone, I can point you towards adopters who are more likely to be around when you're more likely to need them, and who therefore might be a better option. If, however, you're OK with my times, I'd be glad to help you get used to our site. Let me know what you say, and I'll take it from there! --UU - natter 08:22, Jun 8

Jolly good. My own time is a little affected by my baby, who hasn't quite learned that nights are meant for sleep yet, and I've been killing time occasionally by reading this wiki. God knows what compelled me to join. However I'm currently in continental Europe, so obviously your business hours are likely close enough. Little Pink Sock 08:38, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Hello. You'll often find me on UU's talk page, just to let you know. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:42 8 June 2009

Spot on! In that case, welcome aboard, and join the club - I don't know what compelled me to join, and I've been here a couple of years now! First of all, allow me to probably be among the last to congratulate you on the young 'un - and don't worry, sleep deprication will probably help you to understand most of the stuff around here. Particularly anything written by Cajek.

Now, to business: Pop {{adoptee|Under user}} on your userpage, to make it official, and let's get started. Looks like you've already mastered the basics, so here's UU's #2 most important rule of this wiki: remember that, whatever people say, they are usually joking - if you keep that in mind, it makes a lot of the conversations here much easier to understand, and it reduces the chances of you ever thinking everyone has something against you for no reason. If people are serious, they'll usually say. Additional to that, if you think someone has crossed a line, started giving you hassle, or otherwise acted like a dick, have a word with an admin before getting into a major flamewar with them. The admins are here to moderate and stop things degenerating into flamewars, and try to keep things ticking in a civil fashion. Following this advice will ensure you avoid a lot of needless bans, and don't feel vicitimised!

Other than that, what would you like to know? I'm happy to answer pretty much any questions you might have. Oh, and UU's #1 most important rule of this wiki? Have fun. If you're not enjoying it, there's no point! (Oh, and just pat Orian on the head and step past him, most of us do). --UU - natter 08:57, Jun 8

I am not your pet! I'm on roughly equal footing to you "oh straight one". :( ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 09:31 8 June 2009

Alright, I'll leave you guys to it and go back to editing something... Little Pink Sock 09:43, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Are you, like a woman? to clarify? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 09:45 8 June 2009

OK, have fun. Any questions, just give me a shout! --UU - natter 10:04, Jun 8

I'm rolling an idea for an article about in my head, but have my qualms about getting one started. I was thinking of a "parenting guide" that toys with the whole "so you got pregnant and are home with a screaming, pooping 8lbs of a future taxpayer, how to survive?" I just have trouble coming up with a name for the article, or if there's a separate category for such. And I have no idea where to find pictures yet, if there are any in the wiki yet. I just feel a little lost in general today. My thoughts get interrupted by said 8 lbs every now and then, so... Sigh. Gotta go again. Little Pink Sock 12:30, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

That sounds like a HowTo to me, which is both a blessing and a slight curse. Allow me to explain: it gives you a bit of a framework to begin with - look at recently featured HowTo articles on that portal page I liked to, you'll see they have a few things in common, so right away you might feel a little more confident. However, some people on here are getting bored with identikit HowTo articles pouring into the site - lots of people use them very lazily, so any new HowTo these days has to be pretty good to get attention. But it's a good way to start. One of my first articles was this charmingly titled offering - I found it helped me get started.

However, it may be better to style it as an UnBook. Again, there are certain conventions you can follow (look at the recommended picks section for decent examples) but you could style it like one of those patronising "this is the correct end of the baby to hold" books and have a lot of fun with their conventions and language. Either of those might be a good base to start from. What do you think? --UU - natter 12:38, Jun 8

The welcome message on my talk page mentions making pages of your own, too, I tried that with User:LittlePinkSock/Drawer. I think I'll give it a try there, first. When I have a little more flesh on the bones, I can probably get a recommendation to how I can set it up elsewhere. There was something about main space and user space being different, and I have a good guess user spaces are a little more free to fooling around on. Little Pink Sock 12:42, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh definitely create it in your own space, that means it won't get deleted while you get going - it's yours to play with as you see fit, as long as it doesn't break the wiki! I was suggesting you use the format of those articles as a framework to begin with. Shamelessly steal ideas from elsewhere, to start with - that's how you learn wikiformatting. Find a page you like, edit it, copy the code for the bit you like, paste it into your page (don't save the edit on the other page) and then fiddle about with it until it looks how you want it to. Don't worry about the title to begin with, as you write, it'll often suggest itself. More tips to follow. --UU - natter 13:17, Jun 8

Alright, I think I'm ready to give something a go. I found a fun page with quotes about stuff you hear at home, but don't think I can quote all of them, though it'd be fun to have a bunch of them around. I guess I'll try to start with text and then start with content. And I have to hand it to the boys (?) they went through some effort of making a cute signature for me. Little Pink Sock 13:23, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Category:Baby pictures should have a few pics you might find handy. Just play about - it's quite hard to break stuff in your userspace, so experiment and see where it gets you. Have fun! --UU - natter 13:26, Jun 8

If I can manage having fun, sure... I'll try my best, at the very least. Little Pink Sock 13:45, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Regarding the deleted "I kissed a girl" Article

I was going to put it on QVFD then! I was going to telly ou that it's patent nonsense! |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 09:03, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

And now you don't need to, saving you entire seconds of your life. How good to you am I? --UU - natter 10:04, Jun 8

I got started

User:LittlePinkSock/Under The Bed It's not perfect yet, but I figured out how to make sub-headers. Not to mention I'll probably have to choose if it's a "How to: Survive a baby" or a "How to: Survive Parenting". Do you think limiting it to talking about babies is alright, or do you think it'd make for a full "infant to adult" parenting guide? Little Pink Sock 14:47, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

It's a promising start. I like the intro particularly! Formatting is moving nicely. As to the expansion, it really depends on what you feel comfortable with - but I'd recommend sticking to babies. Babies should offer you enough scope by themselves, and if you go for too broad a focus, you could end up either with an absolutely massive article or an article that skips too quickly between ideas. --UU - natter 15:17, Jun 8

You mean about that bit about the hospital? That's usually like it, the dad who tags along to the delivery room is mostly in the way the first time. I wish I'd be better at doing visual stuff on a computer, I could use a few diagrams of babies and whatnot. I guess Google is a friend. Little Pink Sock 15:29, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

If you have an image in mind, but not the facility to make it, there's this place. Put a new request at the top, and one of our talented 'choppers (probably Sonje) will get back to you pretty quickly, normally. --UU - natter 15:40, Jun 8

Some guy called Mhaille edited the pictures I had on the page a bit. I think they're good enough for now. All in all, now I'm wondering, how much text one needs to have before one can consider main space? I'm thinking about making it a How To, so I guess I'll have to look into it next. Little Pink Sock 16:38, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Mhaille does that kind of thing - he's one of the most helpful users on here, and one of the best authors as well. If he makes a tweak to one of your articles, it's usually a good thing! You've probably got enough content there to mainspace it now, if you want, it depends how t you like to do things. Some people like to wait until the article is utterly finished before they release it into the wild - amongst other things, in mainspace it's much more open for others to edit and take away from you, but on the other hand it is also out there for others to see and enjoy. My own preference is to hold on to it until I'm utterly happy with it, and get at least one review before mainspacing, so I know if others are going to see it in a good light. If you want a review, go to the review page and follow the instructions there - someone will get to it shortly, or you can ask one of the better reviewers like Orian, Tags, Saberwolf116 or Cajek to look at it for you - then you know you'll get some decent advice.

If, however, you're happy to let it swim free as it is, all you need to do is create the new page at the location you want (I recommend HowTo:Survive Parenting or similar (the format of the title, with the HowTo: jammed up against the first letter of the title with no space, is important)) then you just copy and paste the text of your article into the new page, and you can use your "under the bed" page for something else. --UU - natter 17:27, Jun 8

I did a brave attempt at moving it to main space: HowTo:Survive a Baby. I can see at least one thing there. I can't see just about any links in the article yet, but I put the construction tag on it, to keep it safe from too much scrutiny... Is there a means of getting feedback beyond the talk page, yours is good, but I guess I'm looking for constructive critique on the overall thing, as well... Little Pink Sock 17:29, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Well, it's in the right place, I'd say, and for a first go, it's in a decent state. Don't put the construction tag on - that's mainly there to put on articles which have been started with a few short lines of content that a passing admin might delete on account of looking like all the other one liners we see far too much of. The other thing it does is get the article deleted if you don;t touch it for 7 days, and you don't want that! Trust me - it's good enough to stay in mainspace as it is. Now comes the next stage - do you leave it as it is, happy with a decent article, or do you sand and polish it to a high degree of shine? You've asked about feedback, so I assume it's the latter - what I'm gonna do here is put it up for a pee review for you. This is the best way of getting feedback, particularly if you get one of the better reviewers on the site. I'm going to ask Orian to take a look, as he's good with reviews and knows his funny. I'll give you a link to the review page in a minute, when it's created. Watch it, and you should get some decent feedback soon enough. --UU - natter 20:30, Jun 8

Oh, there I go and you've already done it. Good move! And another smart move picking Cajek to ask - he'll do you a good job, I think. I'm going to go add your article to the recent HowTos box - give it a little publicity for you. --UU - natter 20:35, Jun 8

Hold your horses! I have this thing I was going to show you. Little Pink Sock 20:36, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Yup, that's the one. Give it a little time, and I'm sure Cajek'll give you plenty of feedback. I'll try to add some more comments of my own shortly, maybe on the article's talk page tomorrow. I'm just trying to sort out a few things while Mrs UU's slumped in front of Britain's Next Top Model, as when it finishes, she has decreed an early night will happen. And at this particular juncture in the month, it's a great idea not to argue with that! --UU - natter 20:52, Jun 8

Tell me about it. Women get rather odd about things around that time. Hormones can cause a whole lot of ruckus if the lady affected is in the mood to bite your head off. I hate being at the receiving end of such. Little Pink Sock 20:56, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

OK, about that review: it's a good one. I've seen a lot of articles, and a lot of reviews - and Cajek knows what he's talking about. From my own look through, I'd say what you have is a well-observed article with a good writing style that is possibly a bit too close to the truth to be really funny, but with definite potential to get there. This is where you focus on exaggerating things for comedic effect, or making some more telling observations. Hardly anyone writes a masterpiece first up - this shows a good deal of promise. Many of our best authors started out with some real crap - look at my first article - Cromer. Oh wait, you can't - it was deleted for being crap! And I'm not sure what Cajek thinks of Side effects now... Sleep on it, (if you are allowed any!) and start on it with a fresh(er) eye tomorrow. And here comes the missus - time for that early night! --UU - natter 21:41, Jun 8

Gah! Side effects! Revealing my secrets! H*gurk!   Le Cejak • <21:44 Jun 08, 2009>

Well, mine is a good start. It's hard to write when one is tired, though... I'm not barring others from editing it (as if I could), so suggestions or even edits are welcome. Little Pink Sock 13:33, 9 June 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Bot

For some reason, my computer refuses to operate the software properly. If you are interested in trying it out yourself, I left some instructions in some other section. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 20:57, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Thanks Socky - I didn't so much ignore your earlier posts as completely not see them due to being useless. Sorry. I may give it a go, but don't hold out too much hope of getting it to happen any time soon. TBH, just getting a Signpost out this week is gonna be kind of fun! --UU - natter 21:00, Jun 8

Hey

I'm glad I can edit the maintenance table now. Do I do both the maintenance and the article count? Saberwolf116 21:16, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, do the full whack - just look through the history at the edits I made when checking yours, and do the same kind of thing for Cajek. It makes sense to me, so hopefully you should be OK with it! (And if you have any problems, I'll sort it tomorrow). --UU - natter 21:21, Jun 8

There, I did one. How was it? Saberwolf116 21:30, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Fine, no problems. Feel free to do another couple if they pop up - I'll keep a close eye out, you know that! ;-) G'night! --UU - natter 21:48, Jun 8

I can't seem to get the averages right. Help, please? Saberwolf116 14:36, 9 June 2009 (UTC)

Never mind, I think I got it right. Saberwolf116 14:50, 9 June 2009 (UTC)

Grrrr.. You power-drunk power ranger..

What happens if I revert you? (other than getting infinibanned and such) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 12:40 June 9 '09

Getting infinibaned...twice? Egypt to return under British rule? ~ 12:56, 9 June 2009 (UTC)

I hope so! The British rule will be much better... And instead of those taxi drivers we'll have BUTLERS!! Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 13:08 June 9 '09

Someone say Power Ranger? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 12:59 9 June 2009

Hi onion69! Also, please take a look at this and tell me what you think of the concept. Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 13:11 June 9 '09

Power drunk? I refer you to Mordillo's earlier edit to that page along the same lines. Getting rid of all the content and having a blank page is kind of pointless when we already have Nihilism. If you think all the content on the Nothing page should be removed, and it should redirect there, then you should take it to VFD, get it deleted and redirected properly. My honest opinion is that since we already have nihilism, the nothing page should be a different joke. Granted, what's there isn't good, but try for a different joke instead of just blanking the page. I'd respond to other stuff, but I'm busy being seriously IRL busy right now. --UU - natter 13:54, Jun 9

"Power drunk?"? In case you didnt notice, I was kidding... Bloody humourless brits... :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 14:08 June 9 '09

I know. In case you didn't notice, I'm really busy! ;-) --UU - natter 14:35, Jun 9

Meh, I know. In case you didnt notice, I've noticed! :-þ Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 14:37 June 9 '09

Principle of Least Action

Can I have the text back for Principle of Least Action? I had to abandon it for a bit for my exams, but I'll work on it in the sandbox. UncycloWebbie 10:50, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

OK. I put it in your userspace here. Good luck! --UU - natter 10:54, Jun 10

Thanks very much. UncycloWebbie 10:59, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

So then

I've been maintaining pee review for a couple days now. Have I been making any mistakes/bad judgement calls? I wanna make sure i've got everything right. Saberwolf116 13:58, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

Today has been sodding mental. I'll have a look this evening, while I watch England labour to an unconvincing victory against the mighty Andorra. --UU - natter 14:47, Jun 10

Your calls - not a problem, you've been doing this long enough to know when someone's given enough to work with. The table itself - don't forget all 3 of those long average columns at the bottom. Orian has, somewhere earlier, opined we don't need them, and it's arguable that they make the process more complicated and annoying. I'm thinking of opening a discussion of SKs to see if anyone would miss them, but unless the consensus is to get rid, I'd appreciate it if you can keep those ticking as well. (I find them interesting/useful, at any rate!) Other than that - good job, and very welcome too, as things are going from busy to fucking ludicrous for me at work! --UU - natter 18:56, Jun 10

I would support getting rid of the averages. I doubt anyone really pays attention to them, and they seem to exist only to give us more work. Saberwolf116 21:24, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

I'm  For. the averages, so that we can compare our scores, and because they're interesting. Plus, they're not THAT much work. Do I get more votes because it's in my userspace? Didn't think so :)   Le Cejak • <21:27 Jun 10, 2009>

Well, that's just the thing: we don't really compare our scores, and nobody really pays attention to them. It's like the ratings system: it might have an interesting purpose, but it's pretty much ignored. Saberwolf116 21:31, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

I'd just like to reiterate that I think they're pointless. They don't actually say anything about wither or not we're good reviewers, and I think they do make updating that list -- especially the proles -- a real stinker of a task. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:11 10 June 2009

i've never really looked at the averages. they're much easier to maintain for PEEING members and steel kidneys than the proles. my issue is this: they seem a little irrelevant because they're based on the quality of articles the reviewer reviews. if someone tends to only review articles he thinks are great, while someone else tends to review articles that he thinks need vast improvement, then their scores will differ. but maybe that's the point? anyway, if cajek likes them, i say they stay. but maybe only for the bottom 2 tables? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:15, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Gerry: I think we're on about the aggregate ones at the bottom, not the individual user ones (which can be helpful to spot someone being stupidly harsh). On topic: Get rid of the aggregate ones, they're pointless, annoying to update, rough as all hell and make the proletariat about twice as big as it needs to be size wise. Keep the individual ones though. Off topic: Has anyone ever thought of making a GUI or something for it? Pretty pointless, but would reduce the strain. –—Hv (talk) 11/06 16:46

I thought of it, Hv. I thought: I'd ask Spang if there was something fancy that could be done, but he doesn't seem that impressed with the whole Pee thing. I am starting to come round to the idea of removing the aggregates as mentioned, although I'm still heavily in favour of keeping the others as (also as Hv says) it does make it easier to spot people being a tad harsh. Among other things. Cajek? Casting vote on that would, I'd say, go to you because of the whole "your userspace" thing. --UU - natter 17:41, Jun 11

I'm definitely in favor of the democratic option. Let's just have averages for the peeing members and the top reviewers, right? That sounds like a good compromise.  For. getting rid of the prole avgs, at the least, and keeping the averages of... whatever lists I'm on at the most.   Le Cejak • <17:46 Jun 11, 2009>

Howdy doody, UU?

Possibly an opportunity to use this image to illustrate the deletion point?

I'm good, having some lovely weather at the minute. That or my heater's broken again. Also I think I've hot apon something I can re-write. I just need your help because A) I'm not really enjoying it, and B) I don't have a concept, and itd be pretty damned hypocritical of me to plough ahead without one. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 15:42 10 June 2009

The temptation I would have is to look at writing from a historical perspective, and specifically the perspective that it is the outdated precursor to word processing. Examine the way it has several similar features, but significantly more primitive - such as the ability to delete erase, almost removing all trace of the previous content, leaving the grey smear. Plus the ability to add "graphics" (ie doodles) of your own. Discuss different "fonts" (doctor's handwriting, teenage girl putting hearts over her "i"s, that kind of thing). Contrast the significant drawbacks in the format, the improvements and so forth - could be kind of fun. Of course, that's just my suggestion, you could completely ignore it and go your own way, but you asked, I answered! Looks like a good article to make that challenging move outside your comfort zone with - I wish you luck with it. --UU - natter 20:14, Jun 10

Hmm. I dunno. sounds kinda not-funny. But then what I've got isn't funny. encyclopedias aren't funny. I might actually just plough ahead with the vague ideas I've got and see what comes of them. Thanks for trying though, I do appreciate your advice and such and will probably use that image somewhere. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:03 10 June 2009

Way to disparage my genuine attempt to be helpful. You're welcome. Still, good luck with your ideas - it is normally easier to make your own ideas work - maybe my ideas sound funnier to me because I know the kind of use I'd make of them. --UU - natter 08:04, Jun 11

Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean to disparage, that's the last thing I wanted, and on reflection it may have been possible for me to have been more diplomatic. However in my defence I was excessively sleep depraved and unable to properly process the information. Sorry :( ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:51 11 June 2009

No worries mate - my response was possibly slightly snappish because I have an eeeevil day ahead of me today. I'm stressing like a good 'un, and have no idea how I'm going to survive. Shall we now stop being quite so British and apologising for everything? Also, you just helped enormously with my day with that typo there - do you arse bandit types ever sleep in a non-depraved way? Perverts! =D --UU - natter 08:57, Jun 11

Sorry I didn't mean to be nice. I just though it was the right thing to do, if it wasn't then I do apologise it's just theres so many socilogical rules that I don't pick up on -- and there aren't any books about it! Also I've now had some sleep and have just realised that dream was not normal at all. So yeah, sorry to hear about your exceptionally bussy day though. In fact I'm sorry that you were slightly snappish because that was probably my fault too. It's not you it's me. sorry ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:11 11 June 2009

So is that a collab?

I think we accidentally collaborated on Lobster just now!   Le Cejak • <21:17 Jun 10, 2009>

Oh, also, I added some weird stuff in there. I mean, pretty weird. I hope it's still okay!   Le Cejak • <23:49 Jun 10, 2009>

Okay, I think I went way over the deep end on this one.   Le Cejak • <0:55 Jun 11, 2009>

A collab? I added a couple of short paragraphs because I was having fun on Uncyc last night - a rarity these days, and thanks to you and Gerry. But that hardly counts as a collab. If I find time to take another look and maybe do more stuff to it then maybe. Right now, however, I have an eeeeevil day lined up. --UU - natter 08:07, Jun 11

Award

Rabbi Techno would like to honour you with the coveted

BLUE SCROTUM AWARD
Which is given to those who have demonstrated remarkably excellent judgement,
impeccable good taste and faultless, all-encompassing wisdom
(by doing something like voting for ME to win WotM).
Well done and thankyou, from Rabbi Techno.

---

How To: Destroy the Earth

I believe that the article you gave to me is nearing completion, so what do you think? User:Clensedsource/HowTo:Destroy the Earth

I know where you live

Go here, answer questions, get free booze and a shoe shine. ~ 15:27, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Thanks

For the little point on my talk page. I don't know if I chose the right words there- maybe I can write, but I don't think I want to. Reviewing is enjoyable to me, as is maintaining PR- mainly because it's a simple task that I can accomplish very well. The main thing is, writing takes hours and hours of creativity and a good sense of humor, and reviewing only takes 5 boxes of good advice. I might be a good writer one of these days, but I don't think i'm there yet. I appreciate the advice- it gave me something to think about. Also, there are a couple of Ban Patrol entries that haven't been checked out- cheers! Saberwolf116 19:32, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for getting rid of that Cyberbully, but you edit conflicted me and I put one on the top. =P Saberwolf116 21:39, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Yeah I did alot of reviewing first before I tore Insomnia out of my head. I think it helps to give the advice and then start writing once you've seen some of the other stuff. Although if you break up hours and hours of creativity into bursts of creativity it's a lot less exahausting. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 04:44 13 June 2009

Really Preemptive Thanks

God knows if this will even be featured, but:

YOU ARE LOVED! And in appreciation for your donation to The Billy Graham Evangelistic Association I am sending a sign of my personal love for you — your very own polyester prayer handkerchief, suitable for wiping the tears of joyous revelation. ~ B. G.

I appreciate that you enjoyed and voted for it nonetheless. This writing thing is just a phrase, I think. I promise to actually try to act like more like a real admin one of these days. ;) --T. (talk) 21:43, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Thank you...

...for addressing the issue at RadicalX's Corner. I was getting slightly annoyed but I dislike drama. So thank you for preventing the drama :) --^Dame 13:00, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

No problem at all. I'll try to keep an eye on it, but if his attitude doesn't improve, please let me know. --UU - natter 13:07, Jun 12

UnSignpost June 11th/12th/whatever

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper That Gets Its News Solely From Vandalism Johnny Is Teh FAGXORZ!!111 SHUT UP DOUCHEBAG!!11

June 11th, 2009 • Issue 51 • Also available in convenient suppository form!

"Uncyclopedia Worst, Boys Smelly" Declares User By Gerrycheevers In a move that shocked the Uncyclopedia community, female user Kamikazewatermelon09 this week posted a topic in the lovable Pancake House of Benson. The shocking part of the incident was that an actual girl visited Uncyclopedia. Hooray! Our numerous virgin users can now cross off 'make contact with a woman (without giving a credit card number) over the internet, phone, or via smoke signal' from the list of steps towards achieving manhood. Though we can't help you with that face-to-face stuff...we hear that genre of contact is terrifying. The content of the post was too lengthy and riddled with cooties for the male, attention span deficient UnSignpost editors to actually read. Furthermore, the UnSignpost Executive Board refuses to add cootie insurance to the UnSignpost employee health plan. However, resident awesome potatochopper and known girl Sonje was recruited to read the message and react as if she had been asked a clever question by a hypothetical handsome UnSignpost reporter. From her exclusive comments, it seems that the topic poster was disappointed in the vulgarity and immaturity displayed by many of our gentlemen users. "I find the crassness rather endearing," Sonje responded, "in moderation." So, the moral of the story is: the users who really count will forgive us our occasional desire to cuss a blue streak or upload some boob-related images. So...go nuts! Cabal Criticism of the Week By: Gerrycheevers This week, lead Cabalist Mordillo blocked The Wizard Of Oz with an expiry time of Judgement Day, and did not provide a reason for the epic pwning. We here at the UnSignpost would like to call out Mordillo on this lack of explanation. Not as a courtesy to the user, which he certainly did not earn through his insertions of a weird version of a California article into several unseeming places. No, we would like to know why Mordillo did not take advantage of an opportunity that was ripe with comedic potential. Surely this poor soul's username could have resulted in a ban reason referencing shiny red shoes or flying monkeys? A statement concerning the location of the user being a place that is not Kansas? We would have settled for a measly 'looking for a brain' line. But instead, you left us hanging, Mordillo. We'd like to officially call you on it, and we take comfort in knowing that though you can ban the editors, and you can ban our freedom, you can never ban the UnSignpost. Though, on second thought, you could delete it.

Check out these pages! Invisible Forum! Happy Birthday Sonic80! Happy Birthday Woody! Happy Birthday Modusoperandi! FREAKING LIAR! From our logs: 15:19, 7 June 2009 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) blocked 94.192.116.120 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎(How To: Fuck off for 3 months) 17:49, 7 June 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) blocked 92.1.87.74 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎(one two fuck you!) 10:00, 8 June 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 203.190.33.94 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎(comedy website. all football clubs get equal treatment here - ie a merciless slagging. mind you, chelsea really do suck.) Biopic of the Week Of all of the writers enshrined in the Uncyclopedia Hall of Shame, Electrified mocha chinchilla has the highest number of featured articles without having ever been profiled in the UnSignpost. Whoops, not anymore. Anyway, his list of works reads like a what's-what of awesomeness. The entity known as e|m|c also organized and ran several Poo Lit Surprise competitions. Worshipful notes and pie can be sent to his talk page. Retraction of the Week In last week's exceedingly humorous edition of the UnSignpost, we referred to Uncyclopedia Bylaw #435 was requiring all returning users to announce themselves in the forums. This is actually Bylaw #453. We apologize for the mistake, and also from the confusion resulting from the real Bylaw #435, which states that every 94 days a user's dog must be sacrificed to the Rancor. Sorry Led, and get well Fluffy! This Week in Uncyc, 1215 The Magna Carta was signed by King John of England, granting certain rights to serfs, peasants, slaves, farmers, and servants. This was immediately parodied in Ye Olde Signeposte, Uncyclopedia's bi-weekly periodical of the time. It was depicted as a document that forced King John to admit he had the power to tax servants, control every aspect of farmer's lives, and shoot serfs in his Royal Preserves for sport.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

I think I'm going crazy. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:09, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

I've just realised something that is utterly irrelivent but ultimately Course-of-history changing about you

You were the 42nd winner of WotM. That means your like the meaning of life and stuff. Which is probably a good thing. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:30 12 June 2009

On the other hand, the 42nd president of the USA was Bill Clinton. Make of that what you will... --UU - natter 12:23, Jun 14

He was a bit of a hippy all told, maybe. I don't really remember.    Orian57    Talk   05:47 15 June 2009

WTF is inclined?

What does the word "inclined" mean? |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 04:10, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

It's somewhere between "compelled" and "persuaded". if your inclined to do something you want to do it usually because of persuasion. e.g. I'm inclined to belive he ate all my damned oreos the fat fucker. Or at least that's my definition of it. Alteratively Dictionary.com may be slightly less falible than me. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 04:29 13 June 2009

What does the word "antediluvian" mean? MR. SMARTY PANTS??   Le Cejak • <4:41 Jun 13, 2009>

see here, it appears wikimedia was invented something called an "online dictionary". --Mn-z 04:53, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Cool. I almost like that word. Archaic has less syllables though. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 05:00 13 June 2009

I don't trust online wikis, only talk pages on humor wikis.   Le Cejak • <5:05 Jun 13, 2009>

I think that's a bannable offense. Probably. You are Cajek after all. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 05:15 13 June 2009

Saying you're a humosexual... now THAT'S a bannable offense!   Le Cejak • <7:32 Jun 13, 2009>

Yes. But an UnAmerican fag and that's worse. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:02 13 June 2009

What Orian said, before this went a little off-topic. --UU - natter 16:31, Jun 13

Yay! Go me. I need a chearleading team. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:32 13 June 2009

Two nights up straight with a crying baby

I'm dead tired. Did I miss anything? Little Pink Sock 13:18, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

A lot of people commented on UU's talkpage. UU hasn't answered them as of yet. That's about it, I think. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:09, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

I got to the end of CSI:Miami, season one. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:18 13 June 2009

I read a few pages in "Portnoy's Complaint" Weird book, btw   Le Cejak • <16:33 Jun 13, 2009>

A lot of people? A few, perhaps... Anyway, hi LPS, I was wondering when you'd drop by. You missed the usual maelstrom of activity that is Uncyc - folks got banned, shit got vandalised and fixed again, me, Cajek and Gerrycheevers had some kind of lobster war, Orian was seeking attention somewhere - the usual kind of thing. Did you have anything specific in mind? Sorry to hear you're still not getting any sleep, here's hoping the tot settles down and lets you have 40 winks sometime soon. --UU - natter 16:37, Jun 13

huh you mention truoble sleeping and didn't link to insomnia!? You don't liek me anymore do you!? You're just too afraid to coem out and say it! Well fine! Fine! I know when I'm not wanted! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:41 13 June 2009

I didn't mean anything negative by that. "A lot" was probably exaggerated, yes. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:53, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

I almost caught some sleep. Then I was woken up again. I don't understand how some can deal with two jobs and a family and be all cheerful and chipper. I think they're all doing drugs... Little Pink Sock 02:25, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Next door's whelp is doing its best to help me empathise with you - mere walls are not enough to block out its penetrating din. However, I don't have to get out of bed and provide any form of ministrations, merely to roll over and swear a few times, so I'm obviously nowhere near! Looks like you're on to a good one for your pics BTW - Sonje knows what she's about, you'll get some good work from her when she gets time. How's that article coming along? --UU - natter 12:29, Jun 14

After I got that review, I've hit complete writer's block. I guess tiredness and the occasional interruption do take a lot outta me. I'm hoping to be able to get some work done on it at some point. However it's an alarming thing to notice I've had four shots of espresso today and still can't keep my eyes open. And yes, I prefer tea, but need has dictated I get used to strong coffee. Little Pink Sock 14:04, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

A Very Belated Thanks For Your Review

Rejoice, Under user! You have been entitled to the
Golden Shower Award

For donating high quality material to the Pee Review.

---

That review was awesome. It'll be very helpful when I get to fixing up the article some more. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:53, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

No problem, good luck with it dude. --UU - natter 12:30, Jun 14

Thanks!

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my recently featured article.

I, like, appreciate your support, or something.

—Guildy

---

Just wondering...

I have 5 in-depth reviews already this month (6 overall), and I have a request to join PEEING that has not yet been fulfilled, do you think you could take care of that? It's Me Bitches! Don't worry, I won't kill you. 04:03, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

If you do have 6 in-depth then you'll already be on the members table (probably), we just haven't told you yet. Also lookie at my new sig!    Orian57    Talk   05:00 14 June 2009

Did you repent of your homosexuality or something? --Mn-z 05:26, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

??? That's the pink Union Jack, celebrating both homosexuality and Great Britain at the same time. Fucking americans. Also do you like the updated sig, I just redid it.    Orian57    Talk   05:30 14 June 2009

Oh, look at that beautiful PEEING page with it's beautiful members and beautiful templates and that beautiful unanswered membership request... wait, that's MINE. Also, i've got a new sig too. Cunt (Talk to Cunt)

And the sig? Looks great. (stifled laughs) Cunt (Talk to Cunt)

God give him a chance, he's only just awake! Won't get into work until 9. And as you're adopter I'd advise you change teh sig to something a bit more subtle, I mean you're first was bad but this just looks like you're trying to be brash and offensive.    Orian57    Talk   06:08 14 June 2009

Shit it's a Sunday. If this was a week day he'd a been soo creeped out! Fuck!    Orian57    Talk   06:10 14 June 2009

Bleedin' hell, I wish I had so little to do I couldn't tell the difference between a sunday and a week day...! Anyway, yeah - I'll get there, I'm a busy man. Plus, weekends are when I go do other things, so I'm not so active here. Plus, have a little patience, would ya? Plus, slick new sig Orian. Plus, I'm not wild about your new sig, LLh3 - as well as just being offensive for the sake of it, you've not set it as a proper sig, so it doesn't come with a timestamp, and I don't like that. Looks like I woke up grouchy, huh? May I suggest changing that sig? Anyway, I'm off to find someone to ban now. --UU - natter 08:09, Jun 14

Me me me me me me memity memity ME! Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 10:17 June 14 '09

Well this is my talk page - who else am I gonna talk about? --UU - natter 12:30, Jun 14

Yours? Don't you mean ours? /taps foot impatiently.    Orian57    Talk   13:10 14 June 2009

Funny. Also, UU, changed up the sig. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 20:57, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Nods in approval - like it. See you on the Pee queue! --UU - natter 21:03, Jun 14

Hello

i am here regarding this : "(are you from Leicester? If so, you have my sympathy - I can almost understand why you'd think swapping our article for Wikipedia's is funny - must be all the entertainment you can find, right?)" yes i am from leicester and this is bullying which is stupid if i could have an apology i would be grateful thanks Costly 14:16, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Dude that isn't bullying. it's not a personal attack on you it's a derogitory insinuation for the whole of Leicester. I'm sure you've made jokes about Scousers (You're from Liverpool aren't you, UU?) And it appears you were messing up the page, so if anyone should be apologising it's you.    Orian57    Talk   14:26 14 June 2009

NO ! NO ! UNDERUSER SHOULD APOGISE FOR BEING DISRESPECTFUL ! Costly 14:30, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

If you want respect, earn it. And don't shout at me. it's disrespectful.    Orian57    Talk   14:40 14 June 2009

Also don't ever edit peoples talk page messages. That's a bannable offence.    Orian57    Talk   15:22 14 June 2009

ok sorry for the offence i will leave then as no one accepts me EVER goodbye Costly 15:26, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

We'll accept you fine, just play by the rules and lighten up. But it's your choice, see you around.    Orian57    Talk   15:28 14 June 2009

Pfft - bullying, hah! Bullying is making a personal comment about you. Taking the piss out of your city is not bullying. Particularly when it's so apt (I'm from Nottingham, actually, which probably explains a lot). Besides, you're the one who decided to replace the pagewith Wikipedia's - you may not have noticed, but we're not Wikipedia. So the page makes some jokes about Leicester. so what? Most of the people who live there have made some or all of those jokes themselves, because that's how most of the city articles get written - by residents. Look at Nottingham, where I'm from, or Leeds, where I grew up, or Norwich, where I live - not exactly complimentary articles, are they? Lighten up, make a few jokes of your own, but don't go calling that bulling! --UU - natter 20:56, Jun 14

Nottingham. That's like middle england, I wouldn't that The North. Also how is there a difference between where you live and where you're from? Or is Norwich some sort of suburb of Nottisngham or something? My geography is really terible though, and I don't properly understand how real cities work (my nearest city (100 and something miles away) is Inverness and you probably haven't evern heard of that).    Orian57    Talk   21:19 14 June 2009

I'm from San Francisco. Yay. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 05:32, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

I hear SF is a real party town. Isn't it in Wales somewhere?    Orian57    Talk   05:50 15 June 2009

San Francisco is kind of considered the "gay city" of the U.S. Saberwolf116 14:16, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Panhandlers are a real bitch. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 17:45, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

I just edit conflicted myself. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 17:47, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

How can you edit conflict yourself ? lol Costly 17:57, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey. It happens. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 20:02, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Thank you Mr. UU

Thank you ... ... for supporting my recently featured picture. A baby potato shall be mercilessly sacrificed in your honour. - Sonje

Especially since your approval incurred me to attempt the nom. --^Dame 18:28, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Thank you for giving me a genuine chuckle on an image! --UU - natter 21:15, Jun 14

I Have Lost all Faith in British Television.

I was just flicking through the TV mag when I came across the title "Casualty 1909" and yes it is exactly what I feared, it's Casualty -- set in 1909! I mean fucks sake! That sounds like something than an UnCyclopedian would come up with! But they're actually putting it on TV! As a fucking period drama -- On the BBC no less! I am outraged! I blame this on the lack of Dr Who this year... Although what do you think of Heartbeat 2012?    Orian57    Talk   19:26 14 June 2009

I think that could be a great article, if you get it going - although those pesky foreigners wouldn't know what Heartbeat is, it's practically a self-parody as it is, so they should get the idea of the quainte olde Englande stylings, particularly if you give them some kind of anachronistic "modern" twist. I lost all faith in TV generally a while ago. There's a "Top 5 picks" app on Facebook, and when it came to naming my favourite 5 current TV shows, I struggled like anything. The paper, a good book, a DVD, a game, and this website are all miles ahead of TV these days in my entertainment preferences. Now if you'll excuse me, some kids have kicked a ball into my yard, I'm going to have to go confiscate it and then glare through my window at them in a disapproving fashion. --UU - natter 21:02, Jun 14

Geeze, why don't you just put a knife in it while you're there. As for TV in general I wouldn't say it was a total loss, but then I'm not old enough to pine after "The Old Days" yet. Although Skins, Shameless and Dr Who are the only things I really go out of my way to watch. I'm pretty much like you otherwise, I mean an issue of The Guardian alone is reading enough for a month. And yeah, I might do that as an UnScript, maybe. I'll see if I can get some ideas together for it then come back for your approval.    Orian57    Talk   21:12 14 June 2009

Oh, I'm slightly worse than that - I don't pine for the good old days, I don't believe there were any good old days. The odd decent show, perhaps, but the majority of TV has pretty much always been terrible. The number of high quality shows around today is probably about the same as ever, but they're a lot harder to find amongst all the dross. Oh god, I'm sounding like a pensioner, aren't I? And the fact that I'm off now for an early night isn't going to help either. It's just a shame I can't retire, because not working might make putting up with the rest of it seem worthwhile! G'night. --UU - natter 21:19, Jun 14

Remember to put your teeth in a glass of water, we don't want you choking on them again! :)    Orian57    Talk   21:39 14 June 2009

UU, I reccomend you give the ball back, I got a woman charged for petty theft once by that. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 04:00, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Guess what?

I finally decided to write something! It's a little rough right now, but I was wondering if you might want to review it for me. Saberwolf116 23:42, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Well that's a sudden leap from the conversation we had earlier, isn't it?    Orian57    Talk   23:44 14 June 2009

I suppose it is. I figured i'd better get it out of the way right now. Saberwolf116 23:45, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh yeah, the first is always the hardest. But it's like with constipation you get the first big shit out the way you're arse gets all loosed up for the rest to just slide out.    Orian57    Talk   23:49 14 June 2009

Give my a fly-by review. What do you think of it? Saberwolf116 23:50, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh but that'd involve reading it, wouldn't it? Was just trying to finish up one of my current progects while I was in the mood. Maybe in a bit, ok?    Orian57    Talk   23:52 14 June 2009

Suit yourself. I was just hoping someone would take a look at it. Saberwolf116 23:56, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

I will try if I get some decent reviewing time, but can't promise. Reviewing time is different from admin time - I can ban a 'tard in a few seconds, but a review takes me at least 30 minutes solid, and I don't know when I'll next have that much time free. I'll get to it eventually, but you may run out of patience by then, because we could be talking days rather than hours. --UU - natter 11:38, Jun 15

OK, new stuff!

I feel I'm earning my WotM nom now. I re-wrote Writing, what do you think? Featurable? And I also started that Heartbeat 2012 thing as un UnScript. Do you think the introduction is good, like, both funny and good for introducing Heartbeat to those unfamiliar? I mean I'm probably gonna ignore the fact it's a police drama (mostly because the last time I watched it, it wasn't. It was a drama with policemen in it.)    Orian57    Talk   02:29 15 June 2009

A quick glance says they both look decent - I'll have a proper look later, when I get more time, but I thought you'd like to know I wasn't ignoring your question. ;-) --UU - natter 11:40, Jun 15

Yay! You're getting used to my paranoid neurosis! But I mean "decent"? is that all?    Orian57    Talk   15:54 15 June 2009

OK, I like Writing - it's a good "encyclopedic" article, and as such, a pleasure to see. Feature? Don't know - while it's a good read, I'm not sure it contains enough "lols" for "the kids" these "days". But please don't despair - for one, I may be wrong (it has been known) and for two, I think it shows your growing skill as a writer (plus I suspect you may have learned a thing or two from writing it, which can't be bad). So, there you go. As for the Heartbeat thing, it's a promising start - I like the shape of it. Take the backwards thing to real extremes though - don't just settle for rejecting phones, spectacles are "dangerously modern" perhaps, giving you some short-sightedness based slapstick. Really go to town and have fun. (I'm sure you will anyway, you have a good eye for the absurd). I look forward to reading it when you've made more progress, and possibly added a few more pics! --UU - natter 21:41, Jun 15

By "feature?" I only meant would you vote for it? I'm hoping to get a pee review for it soon though, and then go back to it (tend to try and leave stuff for a little while before going back for a final polish (think I've mentioned that before)) But decent I suppose is good. And the Heartbeat thing I'm actually really getting into (may even have to turn the talk page into a "deleated scenes easter egg"!) Glad of you're advice I think we're thinking along similar lines. I'll leave a note when I get done (proabably quite soon) And yeah more pictures will happen, I only got sonje to make me that one before I forgot the idea. Generally I like to have the main body of the article before cluttering it up with pics, kinda like that movie with the baseball field; It had to be build before the decoration could be added.    Orian57    Talk   22:03 15 June 2009

My unasked for opinion? Writing could easily be a feature. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:06, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Cool. Thanks! :D    Orian57    Talk   22:09 15 June 2009

Hey Papa

I tweaked it a bit, any feedback? I'm trying to slowly overcome my writer's block, and figured out how to borrow the code for tip boxes. -- Little Pink Sock 09:56, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Well now, that is a definite improvement, and I enjoyed reading it through. It's definitely getting there now - some bits made me giggle. It still needs a couple more pics, but the ones you do have are a good start, and hopefully Sonje will help you further shortly. I hope you don't mind the tiny spelling tweaks I made - I'm a little OCD like that. And stealing code is the only way any of us learn to add anything, so well done on continuing that proud tradition! I'd say carry on along those lines a little more, and you'll have yourself a very good article. Kudos! --UU - natter 10:51, Jun 15

I sometimes wonder at why non-native English speakers are more fluent in English than some native speakers. A mystery to remain unsolved, I'm sure. I'd be in the mood for trying out a new article, but can't think of anything yet. Maybe it'll come to me eventually... Maybe I'll submit it for a real, scored pee review by the end of the week, if I manage to get my sorry little behind to it. -- Little Pink Sock 11:58, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Non-native speakers are taught "correct" forms of English, and don't tend to have the corrupted forms of the language that pass for everyday speech around them to confuse the issue and give them different ideas. So their formal English and grammar tends to be of a higher standard. Where as we natives spend time every day conversing with people who butcher the language appallingly, and often grow up to believe quite appalling grammar is correct as a result. That's a really boring answer, but it's a fairly accurate one. also, I just saw the review you got - I think you're unlucky with that one, it's an inexperienced reviewer, and I don't think they got what you were aiming for, necessarily. I still think it is a decent article with the potential to be very good, and I urge you not to be put off, but to keep refining it. Would you object if I make a few changes myself later this week, if I find the time? (I won't if you don't want me to, I don't want to mess with your baby, so to speak!) --UU - natter 21:50, Jun 15

I won't object to any improvements made by you, since I think you're sensible enough to grasp the overall idea behind the article. As comes to the review, I asked Orian on their talk page if they could still bother writing a review. I asked for a review from a PEEING member believing it would get me a quality review, so I'm a tad stumped by what I got. -- Little Pink Sock 23:43, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Look I know I'm fat but theres no need for pluralises possesive pronouns! <me cries>    Orian57    Talk   23:55 15 June 2009

It was a polite attempt at talking of you as gender-neutral. But I guess I shall henceforth refer to you as dude. -- Little Pink Sock 20:38, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

It's great to see you also man

Seriously... Looks like I may be heading for Amsterdam to check out Mordillo's private pad of ill-repute in the near future... Are you coming? MrN 11:05, Jun 15

Oh man, I'd love to... But I can barely afford to catch a bus to town at the moment, let alone leave the country! Hope that you find the time to start on these "good new article ideas" you have - always like to see new stuff from you. --UU - natter 11:08, Jun 15

Don't go without me! (Just gimme enough heads up, since I'll need to see if I can afford plane tickets and get the time off work, which is or isn't possible... :/)

And btw UU, if you're online, Drop me a line. -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 11:25, 15 Jun

Sorry

I thought she asked for vertical. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 13:12, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

You really need to go back to school for a few weeks, Socky. -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 13:40, 15 Jun

I know the difference between horizontal and vertical. I just wasn't really paying that much attention. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:39, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Is that because LPS is supposedly female that you're so helpful? I could use some help, too. I want to know if there's a code for wrapping text around embedded youtube vids. If you happen to find it, care to throw it into this? /me hugs Socky -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 16:43, 15 Jun

Like a thumb image? I remember doing that on Balalaika. /hugs Luvvy back —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:55, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

morning UU

would you kindly do me a favor and use your handy-dandy admin powers to move our latest colonization to its place at Singapore? i'm not sure i can do it without being able to delete a redirect, or something, and last time i tried to move pages i got throttled and made mordillo sad. thanks! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:53, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Would you kindly? Saberwolf116 13:56, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

You need admin powers to copy and paste now? --UU - natter 14:41, Jun 15

I've seen todd do a "suppress the re-direct" I think that might be what gerry's after. Although maybe not.    Orian57    Talk   14:43 15 June 2009

Most colonisations I can see have just been copy/pasted over the old articles, and I don't see a case for deleting the old versions before putting this one in, so I'd recommend doing the same. If there is a good reason for a huff and shunt, I'm listening. --UU - natter 14:50, Jun 15

well, i thought there was some nonsense about preserving page histories, but if not i'll take care of it myself. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 14:51, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey, it's me! Hea, um... No... Hey! There is a way to preserve the page history (which is surely a good thing). Shall I demonstrate? MrN 15:05, Jun 15

Sure, knock yourself out! --UU - natter 15:15, Jun 15

OK, brace yourself. RC is going to look a bit funny for a bit. ;) Excuse me, I'm just of to delete the wiki... MrN 15:22, Jun 15

Personally, I think it's better like that. You huff the original. Move the new one over the top. Huff that also, and then restore the entire page. Magically the page history is merged and you get both. I'm sure this breaks most of the "rules" for Wikipedia but I think it's OK for us. Obviously I may be wrong about this... MrN 15:36, Jun 15

thanks so much MrN!! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:05, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

I have just had THE best idea!

Average Cop: Actor's Commentary    Orian57    Talk   03:38 16 June 2009

Also finished UnScripts:Heartbeat 2012, I had a lot of fun writing it. What think you? It's on pee so if you get time that'd be awesome!    Orian57    Talk   05:28 16 June 2009

Oh christ - er, not tonight, that's football night, and as such is sacrosanct. Maybe tomorrow, we'll see what the evening brings. --UU - natter 12:41, Jun 16

Oh and I got new shoes. Went surprisingly well this time.    Orian57    Talk   12:46 16 June 2009

Deadly serious about that red link by the way.    Orian57    Talk   12:36 16 June 2009

Uh huh. How would you envision that working? --UU - natter 12:41, Jun 16

No idea - and that's what makes it dangerous!    Orian57    Talk   12:44 16 June 2009

After some consideration I think a sort of mind dump, unbroken block of text would be pretty good. Couldn't get around doing it first person though.    Orian57    Talk   20:43 16 June 2009

After your comments....

I have turned from my wicked ways. Can you forgive me for being rude please? And please, PLEASE make a good photoshop of the images I requested. |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 09:18, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

No problem. Keep your nose clean, and we're cool! I don't really 'chop any more since I got a different laptop from the office with less image editing software on it, but I think your chances of getting an image from Sonje or one of the other 'choppers have significantly improved. Don't forget - it is a request page, they still may not be able to make everything you want, but I reckon you may get something fairly soon. --UU - natter 09:21, Jun 16

We need someone to write the new song: UnTunes:We Built This Wiki. Can you write it please? |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 11:12, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Hang on - you come up with the idea, but someone else has to write it? That's not how it works! If I'm gonna write, it'll be one of my own ideas - I have enough of those to be getting one with. However, I so rarely have the time to write anything these days. That said, it's a title with potential - maybe Todd Lyons would be interested? UnTunes are more his thing anyway... --UU - natter 11:18, Jun 16

Where can I find him? |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 08:29, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

I bring offerings of freshly baked cupcakes

I realise I stepped out of line with that kid's user page, but I also think that though I feel quite a bit sorry for lashing out like that after having slept over it, the original reason for me losing my patience with the kid remains. He delivered critique bluntly without "adding the sugar". To quote one of the good old Nanny™ types, Mary Poppins, "A spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down". I feel so old compared to the majority of internet users. It drives me insane sometimes. I'm approaching the age where I could be legally their mother. Quite depressing today. -- Little Pink Sock 11:00, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Don't worry, we've all been there once or twice. I've been on both ends of reviews that were less than encouraging, and I know how annoying it can be. I also sympathise with the age thing, being old enough to be at least one of their creepy uncles or something. Honestly, you'd think people had never heard of common courtesy! Anyway, don't let it put you off - I really don't think you're very far off a very good article (and I have a little more experience than LLh3). I'll see if I can make a few helpful tweaks when I find some time, but I do think you're doing fine by yourself! --UU - natter 11:21, Jun 17

And let me say you're teh best creepy uncle ever!    Orian57    Talk   16:10 17 June 2009

I'm just sad I let myself even get that angry, but I had a weak moment. -- Little Pink Sock 21:51, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh, I applied some changes to the article, can you give me any comment about if it's any better now? -- Little Pink Sock 22:08, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

Template spam

The Narrator Would like to thank you all... For voting on his rendition of Snow White. "It’s a fine story. Has everything a child needs to learn about the universe and it’s capricious, unfair ways."

   Orian57    Talk   16:10 17 June 2009

It seems

That we have quite a Pee Review backlog. I'll still do my review later today, but do you have any ideas to encourage people to review? Saberwolf116 16:26, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

23 reviews is hardly a backlog. in fact, i was impressed that there's nothing older than 2 weeks molding over at the bottom of the queue...it isn't unusual to see stuff get untouched for months down there. there's really no way to force the queue down or make people review, or at least none that we've thought of yet. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:32, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

However, Saberwolf seems to be a good way of keeping stuff fresh. Like those mints you get in real urinals.    Orian57    Talk   16:34 17 June 2009

You mean cakes. Cakes. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:37, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Don't be silly! Nobody likes wet cake.    Orian57    Talk   16:39 17 June 2009

*shrugs* Urinal cakes. They are pretty fancy. Urinal mints? No. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:03, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

i agree. saber's awesomeness has caused the damp, earthy smell of User:Cajek/Pee to replaced by the subtle fragrance of fresh lilacs and...is that new car smell? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 17:01, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Speaking of which, one of my own reviews still rots on the maintenance table... Saberwolf116 21:00, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

if you're referring to Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Roberto Duran, i can concur that you were correct in assessing it was a good review. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 12:54, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

You do a little gaming?

That Uncyc survey is teaching more than I ever wanted to know about my fellow Uncyclopedians! What kinda gaming are you into? Any MMO's? -OptyC Sucks! CUN17:59, 18 Jun

No he likes space operas. Which sounds a little suspect to me. Yeah, I went there.    Orian57    Talk   18:02 18 June 2009

MMOs? Nah, I'm too mean to fork out for XBox gold, and my home PC isn't so much of a gaming machine... I tend to play solo stuff I can get lost in - Zelda, Mass Effect, that kind of thing. Plus Rock Band (or I did until my XBox stopped recognising the disc - it still works in other XBoxes, just not mine...) and the like. I'm looking forward to Mass Effect 2 and the Beyond Good & Evil sequel. I'd kinda like to do some proper online gaming, but I never got into Halo or Gears, so I'd be shite at them online, and I don't really own any other games that can be played online, so I'm saving my money! Oh, and I like my retro games, being as that was really my era anyway. Speedball 2 being put on Live Arcade made my year last year. Ice Cream! Ice Cream! What kinda stuff are you into, Opty? --UU - natter 10:34, Jun 19

It sounds like we have remarkably similar tastes. I like primarily solo stuff as well, particularily GTA and Guitar Hero. Gears is the most fun I've ever had playing a shooter, but for the most part I stay away from those as well. The only reason I asked about MMO's is because we just got ourselves a new machine so the wifey could play Sims 3, and I could play EVE online. It's the first and last MMO I'll ever play and I was just trying to feel out if any Uncyclopedians might be into it as well. It'd be super fun to get an Uncyc comedy team together some night just to irritate anybody taking it too seriously. -OptyC Sucks! CUN14:17, 19 Jun

Oh yes Gertrude, super duper fun! :P    Orian57    Talk   14:19 19 June 2009

i hereby declare my self to be the greatest goldeneye player of all time. last night i demolished my brother and his friends repeatedly, despite playing with alternate controls due to a broken button. also, my brother was oddjob, which is just cheap. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 14:53, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

oh wow, that brings back memories. That was my first proper shooter.    Orian57    Talk   14:59 19 June 2009

I personally enjoy just running around, while everyone else is trying to shoot me, slapping them in the face. More enjoyable than it should be, really. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 15:02, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Oddjob? But he's so perfectly sized for repeated headshots. My mate always used to play as him and could never understand why I always wiped the floor with him! I would, if it were online, take you up on that claim, Mr Cheevers, as Goldeneye is one of the few shooters I consider myself worth a damn at. Back in the days, my 3 flatmates would all gang up on me, and I'd still take 'em all down. God, that makes me so nostalgic - oh, for someone to play at it right now! I do like the sound of an Uncyc team wreaking havoc on a po-faced MMO, Opty, but I doubt I'll ever manage to be part of one - my machine creaks along so alarmingly it's painful. Guess I'll have to go shoot more Geth in the face instead. --UU - natter 15:28, Jun 19

true about oddjob, but we usually play license to kill which renders direct headshots and grazing leg hits to be equal. i've had many of my proudest moments playing goldeneye and fending off three other players, but my proudest overall was beating out three of my friends in a 3-v-1 starfox 64 battle in which i was the lone pedestrian. viva peppy! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 15:42, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Morning 2Us

That works on loads of levels does that header.    Orian57    Talk   10:15 19 June 2009

Oh yeah? And you know what else works on loads of levels? Your mum! Oh yeah - I went there. --UU - natter 10:17, Jun 19

I'm not sure how to respond. I was just making friendly good morning conversation and you're being all belligerent. I'll have you know I've had a really busy night doing maintenance and having abuse hurled at me. :(    Orian57    Talk   10:22 19 June 2009

I saw - I thought that was what all the cool kids were doing, and I've always wanted to be cool, so I thought I'd join in. Plus, it looked like fun. --UU - natter 10:24, Jun 19

Oh. Right. :( That's cool too. *sniff* But seriously what's doing? I believe I may have just got fleas from my cat.    Orian57    Talk   10:27 19 June 2009

Well, I have a day off, which I am enjoying immensely. And I need it badly - there's a lot of family shit going down right now, and I'm having to be a rock for Mrs UU, who is having something of an emotional rollercoaster. And while I'm naturally happy to do that, add it to the fact that work is still insanely busy and has been for months, and I am getting perilously close to burn-out. No joke. So having an actual day to myself is fucking brilliant. I'm going to go shoot some Geth shortly, as a little therapy, and then get myself out into some sunshine. I may even try to write something over this weekend, we'll see. Perhaps I'll put Ted Nugent's "Cat Scratch Fever" on my mp3 player... ;-) --UU - natter 10:41, Jun 19

How I envy thee! (for the Geth and day off, not for the rest). Also, did you know that Mass Effect 2 won the E3 role playing game of the year, 9 months before it's being launched?!?! ~ 11:00, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

I have the day off too. Although that's sort of the default at the minute... There genuinely isn't much I can do around here, and I'm starting to wish I had money, like real stuff, because I'd actually like to do something this year (I'd actually quite like to see london, Maybe for Pride but I said that I'd save for that last year and didn't).

Don't burn out UU! Although I must say you do seem to be around a lot during office hours for someone whose "insanely busy" Or by that do you just mean "markedly more busy than before"? And I hope to see a UU article soon, They're UUsUUally pretty good.

Sunshine? It's a bit cloudy.

Pass on my best wishes to Mrs UU, hope it all sorts itself out soon!    Orian57    Talk   11:03 19 June 2009

Around a lot during office hours? I generally take a look in while waiting for stuff to compile or copy up - hence the occasional burst of frenzied activity, but at sporadic intervals. I don't normally get more than a minute or two at a time, so don't do anything involved, like writing, but I do get time to ban 'tards and generally try to take some of the maintenance work off ol' Jewstar there in the hope that he'll have time to write more instead! And as to Mordillo's comment about Mass Effect - I didn't see that, that's pretty cool! But I have been reading quite a bit about it, and the more I hear, the more I like. There's talk of a Geth being one of your crew - that could be interesting... --UU - natter 11:10, Jun 19

Geth? In my crew?! I wouldn't trust the thing to do beans on toast! ~ 11:12, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

I own - have even played - this game, and I have no idea what you're talking about. Anyhoo, off to the bank now.    Orian57    Talk   11:14 19 June 2009

Give Gerry 7 more

That should be enough then. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:34, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

No! More! Way more! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:34, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Like... 35?!? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:36, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

How about 100? And make him admin after that. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:38, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

More!! MORE!!!! -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!)

oi! knock it off, you buggers! i'll have you know i'm going to write a critically acclaimed novel concerning my brutal treatment today! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:51, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

And then we can feature it. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:55, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost! June 18th/19th!

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June 18th, 2009 • Issue 52 • Thinly sliced news, between two slices of humor, with lettuce and hollandaise sauce

Votes for Sandwiches Officially Opens By Gerrycheevers This week, Votes for Sandwiches was established by Uncyclopedia Internetist and Lead Executive of Sandwiches, Spang. Previously some sort of secret cabal hazing page, lead cabalists have thrown the doors of VFS open to reveal thinly sliced meats on a variety of breads. Or they would have, if the cabal existed, which it doesn't. Official Cabal Spokesman Mordillo exclusively explained the new feature best: "The cabal, as part of its never-ending efforts to assert its all-consuming control over the citizenry, has now introduced voting for sandwiches. Each editor will be required to eat the elected sandwiches for the entire following month. Members of the cabal will closely observe voter's decisions to make sure that no vile sandwiches, such as BAKED BEANS ON TOAST WITH MELTED CHEESE, will be chosen. That's just vile. Editors will not be allowed to protest over the "democratically" "chosen" "sandwich". We're not Iran." Reactions to the new voting page were mixed. Some users were excited for the opportunity to express their fondness towards various lunches, provided that those lunches are a sandwich. "I'm glad that sandwiches, a comedy staple due to their low-priced nature and assembly so simple that even a writer can construct one, are finally getting their due on Uncyclopedia," said resident criminology term Modusoperandi. Others were not so supportive of the move, and point to recent disturbing trends since the introduction of VFS, the most disturbing being the raiding of the fridge in the Uncyclopedia break room and the subsequent theft of all sandwiches. Well, maybe not all sandwiches, but one specifically marked "gerry's. do not eat." So far no group has claimed responsibility for this act of sandwich-related terrorism. I will find you, you little punk! And when I do, you're making me another sandwich! Comebacks! Only $19.95! Call Now! By: Saberwolf116 Following a month and a half hiatus, resident VFD overlord and prince of pants MrN9000 is alleged to have returned to the wiki. According to reliable sources, MrN was spotted responding to his talk page and maintaining QVFD, among various other tasks. What other things he may do remains to be seen. We do know, however, that he has been welcomed warmly by the community, with Mordillo giving him the brand new nickname "fucker" and various users bestowing an award of reliability on him. BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! Call Now And Get 2 for the Price Of 1! By: Gerrycheevers Following in MrN's robotically symmetrical footsteps was noted keyboard component SysRq. After many weeks of inactivity, Sys has returned to once again putter the Imperial Colonization ship around Uncyclopedia Harbor. He has described his goals as "re-assimilate as best I can" and "Go to hell, Dex". We would like to welcome both of these users back to the loving Uncyclopedia family, and urge them to GET BACK TO WORK!! Things Brewing In IRC By Sockpuppet of an unregistered user People are yelling at each other, stalking each other, and randomly talking to one another. What I am talking about is, of course, IRC, the highly controversial melting pot of Uncyclopedia, where users of all stands, races, and levels of activity can talk about unimportant issues. It has recently come to our attention that ruthless battles were being fought on the fields of IRC. Our correspondent decided to check things out for himself. He was confronted with gay dinosaurs, Star Wars references and general dickery. Though this one time visit cannot render a clear view of the complex nature of IRC, it might give us a glimpse into the mind of the common IRCer. The dark, mysterious character of IRC remains.

Check out these pages! Release personal details here. Overractions! Slander! Hot Republican Chicks with Guns! Death To Our Enemies, or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Illogicopedia. From our logs: 14:37, 11 June 2009 Cs1987 (Talk | contribs) blocked Cs1987 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a nice stroll in the park ‎(The only edit I can make on this website right now is blocking myself. Woohoo!) 15:42, 12 June 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) changed block settings for The Wizard Of Oz (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day (account creation disabled, e-mail blocked) ‎(Follow the yellow brick road to oblivion! Put on your red shoes and dance! dance! Ackowledge that you're no longer in Kansas, Toto. And yes I am the wicked witch of the west. I have a wart to prove it) 12:11, 16 June 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 94.101.164.1 (Talk) with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎(vandullism - and your cheese looks old and stale anyway. bring me something fresher. and a red onion chutney - let's do this properly) Biopic of the Week Sonje ~ Bursting onto the Uncyclpedia scene in March 2009, this spunky female user already has quite the impressive resume. Her six featured images speak of her monumental potatochopping abilities, and she won consecutive Potatochopper of the Month awards. Yeah, that's right. Consecutive. We look forward to many more expertly manipulated images and other general awesomery from Sonje in the months to come. Old School Featured Article of the Week Continuing in the vaguely sandwich-related theme, Sausage Butty Batter Nuggets are a staple of English cuisine. With a complicated recipe that often leads to dangerous and/or hilarious consequences, this food is nevertheless a highly desirable meal for any self-respecting gentleman or lady in England, and is often served at croquet competitions and monocle-wearing contests. Pictured at right is the extra-crunchy West Country variety. This Week in Uncyc, 3500 BC The Great Pyramids of Giza, one of the greatest technological and engineering feats in human history, was parodied in the monthly Uncyclopedia newsletter Bird, Bird, Crocodile, Man With Dog Face, Bird, which was painstakingly written on papyrus reeds by dozens of slaves. In the periodical, the Pyramids were described as "just okay", and were depicted as a stepping stone to grander projects such as Great Cubes and perhaps even a Great Octagonal Prism. Reason to Leave Uncyclopedia of the Week #12: Space issues. With so many users returning, and Cajek refusing to grant access to the Cajek Mansion (which takes up over 60% of all Uncyclopedia's property), there just isn't enough room for us all.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

You'd think I'd learn that this isn't fun to do... Oh well. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:39, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Web 4.0

Web 4.0, which you huffed earlier today, was voted for deletion in November of 2006, but I received enough support on the original vote to refurbish it and the refurbished version was reposted at that point. If there was a new discussion to delete it, then you were well within your rights to do so, but to my knowledge there was no such discussion after 2006. I'm sorry to be taking up your time, but I just want to make sure that Web 4.0 receives due Uncyclopedia process.--Astrofreak92 20:59, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Here you go. I never delete with a VFD reason unless there's been a vote, y'know! --UU - natter 21:14, Jun 19

Lookie! Lookie!

At what I maked! and guess who's making a final comeback? They're just a couple of truly shit articles I came across and then decided to bulldoze. What do you think of Left 4 dead? Is it still game cruft or is it accessible to those who've not played - not really looking to make it a feature but would be nice to know if it's even possible and as for LazyTown (not finished at time of writing), I know the Joshy joke is almost done but it was the only way I could think of making the article acceptable and not shit, although I am sort of hoping I could get a hat-trick (not to mention I'd just love to see Lazytown - in any form - on the front page) and lookie at that - no sentences! Morning UU!    Orian57    Talk   09:37 22 June 2009

I... Er... Huh? Er... Busy... Tired... Later... Maybe... Morning. Sentence fragment. --UU - natter 10:01, Jun 22

Aww UU's tired. :( Oh well. I'm far too untired.    Orian57    Talk   10:22 22 June 2009

Nudge.    Orian57    Talk   08:49 23 June 2009

Nudge nudge. --UU - natter 08:56, Jun 23

Oh god, more history lessons. well if we're doing another comedy exchange, how do you like this?

   Orian57    Talk   09:10 23 June 2009

Honest answer? Like the idea, not so keen on where they went with it. It's OK. --UU - natter 14:57, Jun 23

I'd say pretty mych ditto for the one you showed off. Great idea, just came across a little bland. I do find it kinda strange how we don't like the stuff that each other's inspiration comes from but like each others stuff. Speaking of stuff...    Orian57    Talk   20:31 23 June 2009

Lobsters in the bibble

Awesome additions, UU! I was hoping someone would talk about the bible in lobsters.   Le Cejak • <14:22 Jun 22, 2009>

I've been meaning to add that for a few days, but kept on getting sidetracked by banning people. Like Gerry. I banned him good. But I digress - that has become one of my favourite articles, and the one I've most enjoyed having an inpout (I like that typo so much it stays) into. --UU - natter 15:23, Jun 22

Did you know that before I started contributing to this article I barely thought about lobsters more than once a day?   Le Cejak • <15:30 Jun 22, 2009>

Did you know that I ate lobster this weekend? No, of course you didn't. Probably. But I did. I felt more qualified to eat it that ever before, given my vastly increased knowledge about it. And the fact that it's sinful only made it even more delicious! --UU - natter 20:11, Jun 22

If you have moment or two...

Could you possibly pee on this? I don't really want anything too in depth, just some of my questions answered. Or you could not, and giggle at me as you drive away.... Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 21:01, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

Honestly, right now I can't - the hour has just ticked past, meaning Mrs UU's show has just finished, and she wants an early night. And she needs one, she's all kinds of tired at the moment. Let's see... football training tomorrow night... If it's still on the pee queue wednesday evening, I promise to give it my full, undivided attention. If that's too long to wait, try Saberwolf, he's generally got time! --UU - natter 21:06, Jun 22

I always forget that the time is different in England. I should remember. He always did call at weird times... But no worries. You were the only reviewer I saw around. I may give Saberwolf a try, but I don't want to overwork the poor guy. He seems to be doing quite a few of these nowadays. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 21:15, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

Mrs. UU? Your married? Awesome!--Iwillkillyou333 01:00, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Heidi and Spencer (huffed)

As per the comments that were stuck in there when I last edited it, this was done before I learnt HTBFANJS - or at least in part. The death of this page is not something that anyone will mourn. Especially as I went back to fix it up, did a little research on who these people were, and now I wish I could have those brain cells back. (Or is it Neurons that I've lost?) Puppy 00:13, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Fair enough. Now have a quick look at the signature guidelines - specifically the one about height... ;-) --UU - natter 08:13, Jun 23

Deletion

Im done with some userspaces and stuff, but I need to know how to delete them, like do i need a tab or something?--Iwillkillyou333 00:51, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Well yeah, to delete pages you need the special admin tabs. However, a close second best is QVFD - go there, list the pages on there in the same way other pages are listed, add the magic words "author request" after them, and watch as an admin struts their funky stuff. --UU - natter 08:17, Jun 23

Regarding the redirect link on Rouge the Bat

I have finished my article. The link is here: User:Joe9320/Rouge the Bat. Can you move it to mainspace please? The mainspace article is currently locked and I couldn't move it because I'm not an adimn. Thanks. |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill | 09:38, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Tell you what, Joe, get a pee review. If you get a good review, I'll move it for you. Deal? --UU - natter 11:21, Jun 24

Wikia error, or something?

Every time I edit it's coming up with a giant blue banner telling me there's some sort of fatal server error or something. And yet my edits are still showing up in RC, What the fuck's going on? and is there anyway to get rid of this pointless error warning, so I don't have to relay through the most convenient link pathway I know to get back to what I was doing?    Orian57    Talk   14:22 23 June 2009

And wouldn't you know. It's stopped. Fucking ridiculous piece of shit sod's law or something.    Orian57    Talk   14:24 23 June 2009

“I think the answer you are looking for is that Wikia suck”

~ Spang on This kind of thing

--UU - natter 14:27, Jun 23

So you're not even gonna talk to me directly now? You have to use other peoples words when talking to me? Am I black or something?    Orian57    Talk   14:33 23 June 2009

Gnuh. --UU - natter 14:58, Jun 23

And now you're being incoherent. Are you black, or something?    Orian57    Talk   15:01 23 June 2009

You're not are you? Cos I was just kidding like, obviously, I mean I just presumed you weren't because you work in an office and darkies make spears and do running.    Orian57    Talk   15:22 23 June 2009

Ok so I know you're only ignoring me because you know I'm emotionally unstable but I'll apologise anyway because I may have gone too far or hit a raw nerve and if I did I'm genuinely sorry. :S    Orian57    Talk   16:34 23 June 2009

...or I could have been rushing to try and finish something before I left the office, and so not really had time to do more than joke ban you in response. And then I may have been driving home, and then I may have been having dinner with my wife. Sheesh. (And as for that "stalker" comment on that noob's talk page - you have referred to yourself as a stalker before). Sometimes I really worry about you, Orian. If I have a problem with someone, I don't avoid them, I tell them straight. Sometimes I'm too busy to answer all of your many messages straight away, y'know? You seem to keep hopping from one side to the other of the "accentuating your neuroses for comedy banter purposes/taking it a bit too seriously" divide. Please just chill out a little. Of course, I may be taking you too seriously at this point, which is where things get even more fun, but in all seriousness, can we just relax? I am now going to football training to kick some people very hard because work is stressing me out. Have a good evening. --UU - natter 18:14, Jun 23

Yeah sorry, but I really hate offending people that I can't call up in the middle of the night and then beg for their forgiveness. Sorry. I've spoilt things now, they'll never be the same. :(    Orian57    Talk   20:42 23 June 2009

R. E. L. A. X. No offense taken whatsoever. Normally I would have bantered back, I was just busy. On a wiki, you have to accept gaps in conversation - the other week, I put my review tag on a review, spent my usual hour diligently reviewing, went to save... Database locked. Bollocks. It was locked so long, I eventually had to save the review in notepad, go to bed and post it first thing. And I really hate leaving my tag on a review for more than an hour without finishing it. But what can you do? People aren't always ignoring you, remember that - sometimes, real life happens. Oh, and Writing got featured so fast I didn't even get a chance to vote for it. Which I would have done. You really are becoming one of our best writers at the moment, aren't you? --UU - natter 21:23, Jun 23

Dude that last time was clearly a joke. Or at least I thought it was, I must have been wrong. Sorry. And thanks for your "vote", however you're not getting one of my special thanksplates. no, sir, those are for real voters only. I am actually pretty impressed with how it turned out, actually, and I'm fairly enjoying these new styles and stuff. so yeah. Cool. We're cool right? And just out of curiosity, are you black?    Orian57    Talk   13:34 24 June 2009

What do you think? --UU - natter 14:29, Jun 24

That proves nothing, you could have photoshopped that picture -- Do you enjoy making me look stupid or something?    Orian57    Talk   14:34 24 June 2009

Why yes. Yes, I do. Plus, that is an exact representation of my appearance except for the fact that the bleach blond grew out. Apart from that, it captures my awesomeness exactly. --UU - natter 14:39, Jun 24

Bleach blond? Hell even I'm not that gay.    Orian57    Talk   14:43 24 June 2009

Eh, the wife likes it... --UU - natter 14:56, Jun 24

Liked, you mean. Bet she's not as impressed by the "natural silver" that replaced it. /me runs away    Orian57    Talk   15:02 24 June 2009

Yes, because bleach on grey hair would give blond hair. Your logic is impeccable. --UU - natter 15:04, Jun 24

Well Sor-EE for not being a hairdresser!    Orian57    Talk   15:11 24 June 2009

I thought that was the only career you were qualified for, being gay and all. --UU - natter 15:17, Jun 24

no, I could also be a fashion designer or a rent boy. you need to open your mind a bit more.    Orian57    Talk   15:22 24 June 2009

Orian57 i had the same problem on sunday you should try and clear your internet history on your pc because that worked for me thanks Costly 16:51, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Probably about time I did that anyway. Laptop might get stolen and then The whole world will know what I'm into! Also, I like how you thank me for you giving me information. Like I said it's actually stopped now. But thanks! :D    Orian57    Talk   16:56 23 June 2009

Seriously, I think something's slipping on the Wikia server side - that or these massive forums and Spang's talk page are killing the wiki. The amount of times I've clicked on a link, waited for ages, only to get a blank page display, or some kind of error message, has ramped right up recently. On my home and work connections. And I had the same issue earlier, and it stopped at the same time. I think the hamster powering the Uncyc server is getting old. --UU - natter 18:14, Jun 23

Or possibly developed resistance to Caffeine. We need to up his dosage. ~ 18:29, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh that's a relief I thought It was just my computer. Although certain other things aren't being very fast on my internet in general. Is that the wikia servers too?    Orian57    Talk   20:42 23 June 2009

Our collab

Is now half a year old. Shall we throw a party? ~ 14:22, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Only half a year? I could have sworn we started it before I got married... --UU - natter 14:25, Jun 24

No way! That was ours. --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent 14:54, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure it was both. --UU - natter 14:55, Jun 24

Wikia ERROR or something

It says you banned me, but I've never been banned before. So it must be some sort of error, right? RIGHT?! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 15:43, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

WELCOME TO THE CLUB!   Le Cejak • <15:46 Jun 24, 2009>

Ahhh! I'm not in your club! NO! I'LL NEVER JOIN YOUR SIDE! NEVER! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 15:56, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

It won't take long before YOU have 200 bans, Woody. I've seen what you say about how uncool you think the other admins are!   Le Cejak • <16:03 Jun 24, 2009>

No! NO! It's not true! You gotta believe me! I never said those things! Please! I Am a good boy! I AM A GOOD BOY! Mama Taught me to be good And so I am! 16:06, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Didn't you call the holocaust a Zionist lie? And then you beat all those protesters who voted against you in the recent election! I'm glad you came to Uncyc, "Achme-Woodburninator-ijad" but you MUST answer for these crimes.   Le Cejak • <16:09 Jun 24, 2009>

Speaking of which, i'm #3 on Pee Review, UU is the overlod of PR, and he's never joke banned me. Does not compute. Saberwolf116 16:22, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

No! I am not him! I walk by his house going to work every day, and sometimes he sees me and asks me to do a little work around the house. And then that day, as I was coming back from work, he told me he had an old chifferobe that he needed cut up. So I went in his house, and I said "Where is this chifferobe you need cuttin' up, Mr. Ahmadinejad?" and he.... he started getting real close to me. He said he had given all of the children a nickle to go get some ice cream in town, and I said it was real nice of him, to give the children a treat like that, but I still needed to know where the chifferobe was that needed to be chopped up. But all of a sudden, before I knew it, he was all over me, and brought me in for a kiss. I pushed him away, but all of a sudden I heard cursing coming from the back door, and Mr. Ahmadinejad's father had come back from the fields, and he wadn't too happy. Well, I just turned my back and ran outta that house as fast as I could. I never touched that Iranian President none, and I never hit him, and I never raped him. And that's what happened. I AM A GOOD BOY! Mama Taught me to be good And so I am! 16:36, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

I need to be banned

I just raped myself. The humanity! Saberwolf116 17:06, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

:) --T. (talk) 18:04, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

FU

on behaf of the FU gradjewating class of 2009 we the stewdents of the Fackulty of Agrickulchur awnors program wish to xpres our sinsear appreesheashun for yer suporting a desent edjewcashun for peepul like us hoo mite haf utherwize ended up in jail for growin pot or sumthin which we wood of like only did just for medical use cuz we herd that Flin Flon, Manitoba needed help cuz they coodnt keep up with deman anymor ~ Ricky, Bubbles & Julian

Thanks, UU!  :) --T. (talk) 18:04, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey UU

Jus a quick question... I been searching forever but cant figure out how to creat a sub category? I wanna create one for my user template for Users... Please help meeee I had thinked that i wasnt newb anymore but seems like i is Sir ACROLO KUN • FPW • AOTM • FA •(SPAM) 06:36, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Unblock

Heh, thanks for that unblock. I guess I screwed up on getting that second revert, but I couldn't fix it because of the retarded move limit. Luckily, I got unblocked before I had to get out the online proxy o_O. Thanks! Joeyaa 09:07, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

No problem, sorry for the block in the first place - just spotted the vandal moves and went into "ban anything I don't instantly recognise" mode. However, occasionally I do notice my mistakes, and hopefully no harm done that lengthy therapy won't put right! --UU - natter 09:10, Jun 25

Sorry Joe, he gets confused dometimes, thinks he's still a police officer. Don't you grandad, yes you do, oh yess you do. Got to take him home now - well The Home, wife doesn't let him stay with us since he cooked the dog.    Orian57    Talk   09:13 25 June 2009

Pee Review help

Hey, UU. It seems that a new user, Thomasfan666, did about 7 shitty reviews with no content last night. Do you have any words for him? Saberwolf116 15:10, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, I added my words to everyone else's - I try to be more encouraging, as you should recall. If the guy's going to do 7 reviews, he may respond to encouragement by becoming a decent reviewer - so keep the message friendly and so forth, and if he does it again, then get tough. --UU - natter 15:57, Jun 25

OK, I just did something I never did before: I reverted his last 4 reviews, which were just as bad. I know that we're not supposed to revert reviews, but they were of no help at all, and they are wasing the writers' time. If I was wrong, feel free to revert them back. Saberwolf116 18:01, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Well, in the past we've let people either revert or request new reviews depending on how they feel, but those were so crap I don't think it's a major deal. I've made a stronger representation on his talk page than you did this time - I'm nice first time, but if I'm ignored, things get ugly! Let me know if he does another, I'll take care of him. --UU - natter 19:58, Jun 25

More on Thomasfan666

This, which occurred after this, which was then edited to this. Do with it what you will. IronLung 22:59, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Hi

You seem to be the fountain of knowledge for all things...um...useful, so how do I move an article into the mainspace? I don't want to do it yet, but eventually (once finished) would like to move this User:Nameable/Corn Flakes to just Corn Flakes. Plus, I really like the Lobster article, which I believe you collab'd on. It's great!Nameable • mumble? 20:30, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Plus plus, this takes a long time to scroll down. Time for an archive maybe? (And I check people's spelling too!) Nameable • mumble? 20:33, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

Well now, if you want to move an article, there are several approaches, depending on whether or not there is an existing article of that name in mainspace. They are:

• If there is no such article: either use the "move" tab on the userpage to move it to mainspace, and list the redirect that leaves behind on QVFD, or just copy/paste the code from your userspace version, and create the mainspace page with it, then list your userspace page on QVFD. They're not massively dissimilar methods, I suppose, it just depends if you want to preserve the page history (first option) or not (second one).
• If there is an existing article: start by getting a pee review and asking for an opinion on whether or not it's an improvement. Also, check if the original author is still active and ask if they mind you shifting a rewrite in place of their stuff. If it's agreed that your new version is the nuts, then either copy/paste your code over the existing page in one edit, and do the QVFD thing with your userpage, which again loses all the history of your version, or ask an admin to delete the old page, move your version in, then delete and recreate it, which melds the histories of the page together so all versions are preserved.

I think that covers it. And I'm glad you like Lobster - I had fun watching Cajek and Gerry write the funny stuff on that while I added some padding. As to an archive, I only did one a week or so ago - maybe I'll go all Spang on it this time... However, I am going to have to finish by drawing your attention to the "no whoring" warning in large, colourful letters at the top of this page. If I hadn't already voted on that, it'd be an automatic silent abstain (ie no vote) as a result. Please don't do it again. --UU - natter 20:44, Jun 25

Thank you very much for your advice. I hear you're on sabbatical. Have fun with that. And no, I will never do the unmentionable again. (I even got rid of it in the first message once I saw the sign!). Nameable • mumble? 19:53, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Review request

Can you do a review on this whenever you got the time? --IwillKILLyou333 Talk If you dare 21:03, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

As you'll notice on my userpage, I'm off on a break. If the request is still there whenever I get back, I'll have a look for you. However, I recommend asking Orian, and bugging him until he does it! --UU - natter 08:47, Jun 26

Adopt a n00b

Hi boss. I'm still trying to find my feet around here and I've just gotten a teeny bit miffed over something that I came across earlier this morning. I've appreciated the feedback and help I've gotten off you in the past (The signature is slowly shrinking) and I'd like to have just a teeny bit more. I'm house trained and have ${\frac {31}{32}}$ths of my original teeth. Plus everyone that has a valid opinion on Uncyclopedia has determined that you are the one and only person to turn to for all of my issues. Pup ←see tiny!.

Well yeah but that's only because eventually he'll get so annoyed he'll leave.    Orian57    Talk   06:40 26 June 2009

Can I just point out again that that was Orian saying that and not me... I personally think you're the bomb. Of course I'm only saying that if you agree to adopt me, otherwise you can sodomize a goat! Pup

"The bomb" - why is that a good thing? Is it some stupid American war fetish slang, or something? Fucking Americans.    Orian57    Talk   07:16 26 June 2009

I don't know - I was re-writing an article about the Americanisation Americanization of Anime and somehow it kind of stuck! (I think it means good - do you have a Jive/English translator translater on you?) Pup

Lol that'z funy because you forgot to put the "Zees" "Zeds" in the wordz you crozzed out.    Orian57    Talk   07:23 26 June 2009

Leave me alone, I'm just a n00b!Pup

Hang on, there is no z in translater - it's just the "o" to the "e"... let's see him admin his way out of that one!

Morning Puppy - normally I'd be happy to adopt and so forth, but I've just kinda burned out on Uncyc right now, and I'm looking to take a short wikibreak. I think I need it, I'm taking things too seriously. If you still want help when I get back, I'll be happy to provide it. As it is, I'm going to change the adopters page, delete a few things, and get my ass off here for a few days. I recommend Mordillo as an adopter, providing he has room. Good luck! --UU - natter 08:19, Jun 26

I was JOKING! Don't leave us please! Please don't leave! /Me clings to UU's leg (note though, that in all seriousness I understand. Hope things work them selves out for you, mate, and have fun.)    Orian57    Talk   08:23 26 June 2009

Orian - I'm blaming you on that one! Pup

can i have a copy of my weegeee article

i noticed my weegeee article got huffed because of icu.it wasnt my fault it got deleted.i didnt know how good it was because i didnt see an icu tag on the page and didnt know it needed to be improved.there was an icu tag like you said but it didnt show up.can i have a copy back of my article so i can improve it to fit uncyclopedia standards please Jupiterfox

Sure. I put it in your userspace here. Good luck! --UU - natter 08:26, Jun 26

The Barbarians

Are at the gate. And you're leaving me along with Modus to fend them off? *sob* ~ 08:39, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

I'll be back soon enough, I just need a few days to chill out. When I shouted blue murder at some poor granny for having the temerity to drive in front of me at the speed limit this morning, I knew I was taking too many things too seriously. I sit here at my desk and I can feel the tension in me. Don't worry, my batteries recharge quickly. Plus, I've got that collab to come back to! --UU - natter 08:45, Jun 26

Well, as long as you're not away for too long. I feel like taking some time off too, but worry too much that someone will be kind enough to do a mass deletion of Unnews or Unbooks or something. Have fun during the weekend, and have a pint on me. ~ 09:01, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Or better still try drinking shots off Mordillo's chest. Helps me everytime.... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)