I just saw the Vandal thing and couldn't resist getting Grueslayer blamed. If you need to, take me out of it. I'll go moderate other fights if I must. Conniving 15:10, 3 June 2007 (UTC)
Tortillian teachings state that Tortillism is compatible with all other religions, except BENSONISM.
Here are your official membership templates, should you choose to join.
Actually Capercorn, Tortilla is a P*w*rsh*t like troll. I just attempt to stop his flamewars, then ignore him. Uncyclopedian: think first. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 22:14, 5 June 2007 (UTC)
If you happen to contribute badly to a flamewar, you will be pushed down a rank. Same with Capercorn. and any Bensonites who flame against you. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 22:23, 5 June 2007 (UTC)
Did you hear? He's done with vandalising, and wants to HELP Uncyclopedia! He even told me on IRC that he may join the Grue Army. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 02:04, 6 June 2007 (UTC)
For the constructive criticism on Industrialization.
You get a gold "Thank you" Star.
As soon as I find it. --TheNewWayToBeStupid 15:51, 6 June 2007 (UTC)
I really need you to finish the TYATU match. Pongo already devised the list of Series 2 challengers, and I decided that we would use the TYATU battle to begin the plot. So hurry up and conclude it. Just make the win page (after finishing up the match), and i'll alter it later with the plot bits and the proper links to Series 2 at the end. Conniving 01:46, 9 June 2007 (UTC)
And you are editing UnScripts:The Grand Army. You can help if you want. It will only have 7 episodes, though. And don't hijack it. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 00:56, 12 June 2007 (UTC)
Good to hear. Those mean people on Wikipedia deleted it. ;-) [1]. Pahomeboy1992 00:37, 15 June 2007 (UTC)
Uncyclopedia has funny, not facts. Wikipedia has facts, not funny. There. That was the problem. This is where you can put hoaxes like that. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
TYATU has been kept! Taken off VFD! Ignore the UNKNOWNTROLLs, and rejoice1 Celebrate! It is time for merry parties! --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 00:21, 19 June 2007 (UTC)
I used MS Paint for my anti-Communism image, the one with the black X across the hammer and sickle. Please award me? --Trar (talk|contribs|grueslayer) 12:28, 18 June 2007 (UTC)
IN THE BEGINNING, THERE WAS AN UNCYCLOPEDIAN. THEN THERE WASN'T FOR A FEW MINUTES, THEN HE CAME BACK. AND THEN THE MIGHTY REFRIDGERATOR OF COKE SWOPE DOWN FROM THE HEAVENS AND AWARDED THEE FREE COKE. THEN THEE SOLD IT TO FUEL THINE COKE (the other coke) ADDICTION. THEN ALOT OF OTHER SHIT HAPPENED. TA-DA! NOW GIVE ME A PEANUT so sayeth Sliferjam ~ Talk*Sock*Jam*Gallery*Fearless Fosdick? 15:43, 18 June 2007 (UTC)
Don't bother reporting anything, he's banninated for "not doing a good enough rewrite". --TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 03:22, 26 June 2007 (UTC)
Capercorn has been around much longer than Tortilla. Capercornis better than Tortilla. Yet Tortilla is in TYATU, and Capercorn isn't. Why? --CapercornFLAME!what?UNATOOWS 02:25, 29 June 2007 (UTC)
Because Tortilla is more outright annoying, and better known as an Anti-Benson, although you are better than Tortilla. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
no, the civillians weren't cheating, but your changing of the rules are! i keep trying to avoid every single loophole imaginable, but that's what, impossible? I challenge you to one last battle. With honor.If either of us cheats/uses a loophole, they lose. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 00:40, 3 July 2007 (UTC)
Damnit, not again! I understand maybe a 1 day block, but A MONTH? That's insane. You DO have good edits, and I can't see how you were stirring up shit. I'll see what i can do. A freind in need, is a freind indeed. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 16:52, 3 July 2007 (UTC)
I was wantin' to know if you would add {{User:Tom mayfair/Template:Userawardpage}} to the bottom of your Zombie of the Month page. I made it for these type of user space projects so we could reach out more to users. You're not obligated to, just thought it would be nice. The template is also a link on the main award template as User Space Affiliations. Just think 'bout it. 01:35, 22 July 2007
did you see what Famine said about your block? Cause he kinda destroyed the evidence already. Well, if you didn't, I'll tell you. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 15:06, 3 August 2007 (UTC)
... I meant and WHY you were still blocked after we begged for a un-block. Well, basically, no good edits, which seems to be the Deth Sentence for Famine. He dosen't see Grueslayer and TYATU funny the way WE do. Also, no more Drama. Period. I dont know. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 15:12, 3 August 2007 (UTC)
I like some things about Famine, but sometimes I think he carries things too far. --SirStarnestommy (Talk • Contribs • CUN • Capt.) 05:18, August 4, 2007
I wrote just two articles and do nothing but maintenance. Does this mean that Famine will permaban me if I don't write something good by tomorrow at 5:31 AM? --SirStarnestommy (Talk • Contribs • CUN • Capt.) 14:13, August 4, 2007
Famine probably identifies a good article as one that gets featured quickly. We already know how god Famine thinks maintenance is. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
Actually, Famine might be violating a Wikia policy by banning users for not contributing. --SirStarnestommy (Talk • Contribs • CUN • Capt.) 14:18, August 4, 2007
Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."
Welcome to UnNews, Uncyclopedian Again, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.
I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.
Good things that can happen to you
You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.
What happened to my article?
If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.
Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.
Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?
UnNews Audio
If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.
UnNews UnFunnies
At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.
Order #0002 - Paid in Full: Y2 (Including 50% discount for - UNSOC/Grue Army member) - Confirmed. - Admiral Enzo Aquarius-Dial the Gate 01:27, 12 August 2007 (UTC)
Hey, are you still in our little Survivor competition? Because you're the only contestant who hasn't voted at all for the last three rounds... Anyway, your vote would be greatly appreciated.--PhlegmLeoispotter* (garble! jank!) 13:01, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
*** UNSOC OFFICIAL PARTY STORE ***
*The Favorite Place for Proles to*
******** Shop or else! ***********
Item: DONATION TO THE BERLIN WALL FUND
Paid to: BERLIN WALL FUND
Price: B 100
Paid in Full? YES
Enjoy your new items!
Don't be afraid to come again!
Your vote for NotM is much appreciated. As a token of his gratitude, Gerry wishes to offer you his services should you ever be looking for a goalie while planning a pick-up street hockey game.
thanks again for your support. i hope to continue to earn your respect, approval, and spare change. --SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 03:52, 4 September 2007 (UTC)
I've noticed that you haven't updated your Status Report in The Uncyclopedian Forces Urban Dead group for a while. I'm just checking in to see how you're doing, and ask if you're still around. If not, it would be greatly appreciated if you could remove yourself from the status reports page, and list yourself as retired on the Membership list. Thanks!
EugeneKaywuzhere(whinethank)00:20, 14 September 2007 (UTC)
Pelsae aeccpt tihs etxrmely ltae tnkah you tmepltae for yuor vtoe for taht wierd atrcile taht porblaby hrut yuor eeys. Yuor wsiodm and gnersotiy are ellquad olny by yuor bearth, wihch is as fersh as a smmuer ham.
TYATN is a project me and Asema are working on, you can join the project, but you make your own Lexicon page thing. I do appreciate the edits though. --Lt.High Gen. GrueThe FewThe Proud,The Marines 02:27, 26 September 2007 (UTC)
So what is this article adoption thing?
-Masterof9puppets 21:21, 26 September 2007 (UTC)
All these articles tagged with Template:V, well, they need help. You can adopt one, and then you would have to work hard on improving it. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
Yes. Adding {{V}} alerts people that an article needs help, and by removing {{V}} and adding {{VA|1=~~~}} you basically adopt that article. Then you work hard on the article that you adopt, to make it better. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
I agree that this article does have a lot of potential, however, it's current state is just lacking something.
I do happen to have some ideas, I'd like to talk to you directly about, if possible.
If you have any IM's you can add my hotmail account so we can talk.
lord-gneo@hotmail.com
Let's save this freaking article. >:|
Uh, you mentioned in your review that I would be banned for moving that page into mainspace. Why's that? Or, were you joking? Am I completely oblivious to everything that's going on around me? P.M., WotM, & GUN,Sir Led Balloon(Tick Tock)(Contribs) 03:57, Sep 29
A while back you signed up for our Nexus War Uncyclopedian Forces and i'm doing a chase up of all the inactive members and also doing some recruitment. If you've quit playing could you let me know so I can add you to our retired members list. Thanks :) (Bonner) (Talk) Oct 4, 14:40
What he said. Also, since your account in the Forces has idled out, you'll have to request an invitiation to rejoin. —Hinoatalk.kun 07:04, 5 October 2007 (UTC)
Yo dude I saw your ad in the adoption centre and I was like wondering can you like adopt me? Cuz I wants to be part of that n00b onslaught.pinky101 16:08, 23 November 2007
Hello, Yoinxxer Uncyclopedian. You now exchange stuff at the UnCyc, the Yoinxx based store and take part of Top Chop, the Potatochopping coni-test. Or make a store of your own to make even more Yoinxx than usual. You can also buy stuff from the Ystore and preorder things for the Yhouse (Coming soon). --SirGeneralMinisterG5FIYCUPotM[Y]#21 F@HKUN 12:24, 29 November 2007 (UTC)
Welcome back. I see that you did a Proofread. Do you remember the movie "Dances with Wolves"? Kevin Costner was all alone on the frontier, and trying his best to make friends with the Indians so that he wouldn't get slaughtered. Well, for the past month I have been holding down the Proofreading Fort single-handedly. Seeing as how we had not gotten supplies in a very long time, I was forced to eat all the other members. You DID bring supplies, didn't you? (eyeing Uncyclopedian hungrily...)
Nope. Sorry. All I brought were some sandwiches, a proofreading machine, and an annihilator cannon. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
hehe I'll try to remember to update the counter. Now give me a sandwich! I am immune to the Cannon, seeing as how i have gained the souls of all those i have eaten. If you strike me down, I will come back alive again...just like a cat!
I was in the middle of reviewing RED BARON, and i had put a note as such on the template..guess you didnt see it...or perhaps we were both doing it at the same instant...oh well...
EDIT: lol yes i had posted my intent 3 minutes before you posted the actual review..glad we didn't cause a collision
EDIT REDUX: OH SHIT!..i just realised...i have been waiting for you to come back. I am VERY interested in becoming a character in 'TYATU'...yes I have been here since Oct, about the time you disappeared, so you don't really know me yet...perhaps in the coming months ...
1: Oh, sorry about that. 2. There is a section of TYATU where you can sign up to be included. It would be even better if you help create TYATU, because very few people are contributing. MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
Thank you for proofreading the article 'Metal Sonic' for me. Now all I need are some pics...*bustles off to do something*
--Garionepsilon 13:02, 9 December 2007 (UTC)
As promised, you are presented with one (1) package of Red Baron French Bread PizzaTM for your thorough Pee Review of that article involving flying things.. Please note that Red Baron microwaveable pizzasTM may cause loss of altitude or engine failure.
thanks for your review, people seem to like this one so i'll probably see how it does on VFH once my other self-nom comes down. incidentally, the picture of the red baron as a child wasn't a photshop at all, it was just an image i found of a child's toy plane. it just happened to say 'red baron' so i went with the joke. however, i can definitely see how the image doesn't quite fit, so i'll see what i can do with it. thanks again! --SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 04:27, 10 December 2007 (UTC)
[17:43] * TomMayfair wishes his character would die
[17:43] <Kalir> In TYATU?
[17:43] <TomMayfair> Yes
[17:43] * Fag wishes he was in TYATU
[17:43] <Codeine> character assassination?
[17:43] <Fag> purely 'cos I'm so vain :p
[17:43] <TomMayfair> Please?
[17:43] <Codeine> I think mine died some time ago
[17:43] <Codeine> not that I've really read it
[17:43] <Kalir> We could have Fag assassinate Tom, kill two birds wif one stone.
[17:43] <Codeine> anyhow
[17:44] <Fag> haha that's cool Kalir
[17:44] <Kalir> He could be the Flamboyant Hitman.
[17:44] <TomMayfair> Mine is dull, over use of Communism, it's sickenin'
[17:44] <Codeine> I need to make the obligatory sequel to "An Uncyclopedian Christmas Tale"
[17:44] <Finntastic> haha :D.
[17:44] <Codeine> Fag could play, errr... the gay guy maybe
[17:44] <Fag> I could be the new token leftwing stereotype / token gay xD
[17:44] <Codeine> Finntastic will, of course, be the Love Interest
[17:44] <Kalir> Codeine: Not just the gay guy. The gay hitman.
[17:44] <Codeine> cool
[17:44] <Finntastic> :>
[17:44] <Fag> dun-dun-DUNN. :p
What do yew think? Myself, I'd be more than happy to be included, being the vain bastard
that I am :P ~FagxFS
Yes, put me out of my misery. Fag can replace me. I've never seen a deadhorse kicked so much in my life.
You can't die Tom. You have ingratiated yourself into Un too well. You're like one of those stains that you can't seem to completely remove from your BEST shirt, but you can't throw the damn thing out 'cause you love it so. (yes that was a compliment)
Well, I'll try to get you in, Fag. Tom, I'll lower the amount of randomness involving communism coming from your character. Plus, THERE IS AN AUDITION PAGE, PEOPLE! MarshalUncyclopedian!Talk to me!
Keep reviewing! The poisonpee means that something needs to be changed, it's not an attack. Again, keep reviewing, and if you get it again just change your review around a l'il! Le Cejak•<-> (Dec 11 / 16:17)
I agree with your edit to the guidelines keep reviewing yer doing fine Le Cejak•<-> (Dec 11 / 17:44)
Awesome. It was fun to read your review. I'm gonna fix it up per your instructions, and see if you'll change your scores. "Uncle ralph wasn't very lively himself" got me giggling for some reason. Again, good job!
Le Cejak•<-> (Dec 11 / 18:12)
Eh? Whaddya mean by that? In case you're selectively blind, I wrote "I burning your Romania does not exist" right before said signature, which is not only 3 injokes, but also a completely factual sentence. But then again, you might not be able to read this because my sig is right next to it. Ah well. •Spang•☃•talk• 23:33, 14 Dec 2007
Heya, The Led Balloon here, wishing you merry Christmas, or any other holiday you feel like celebrating. Just remember what it's all really about: NO WORK, NO SCHOOL, FREE STUFF!!!
Here's to hoping your school(or work) calendar for December doesn't look too much like this...
You are presented with one (1) serving of delicious flaming Baked Alaska in thanks for your vote for Alaska. Extreme caution should be used when making, eating, or igniting Baked Alaska. And be sure to keep Uncle Leo's oxygen tank at least 30 meters away.
STUFF THIS DOWN YOUR WIKIFIED STOCKING! [Citation Needed][edit source]
Yo you, yes you, I'm talking about you! It's that time of year again. Yep, time to spend hundreds of dollars on loved ones, dress up your house and raise your hydro bill and, most of all, time to fill each other's talk pages with templates that took us 2 minutes to make. SO STUFF THIS DOWN YOUR STOCKING!!!! and have a happy holidays!
...or a Chappy Chanukkah, Kwanzaa, Boxing Day, Tet, Ramadan, Festivus, or whatever you so decide to celebrate in order to get more gifts.
Despite being required by British law to carry an umbrella throughout December, and to respond to all festive cheer with "Bah Humbug", nonetheless I wish you a very Merry Christmas. Or Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or whatever other gnostic mystical mumbo-jumbo you colonials practice these days. Just don't tell the Queen.
HEY LOSER! Here's another semi-personalized (that's a lie) Merry Christmas template to add to the overwhelming pile you've got building up on your talk page right now. Have a Merry Christmas, or I'll come over there and make you have a Merry Christmas.
If you don't already have a pile of these building up, you're a hopeless loser that nobody on Uncyclopedia likes...sorry.
Collect as many as you can! -RAHB 14:19, 18 December 2007 (UTC)
I Am Also Distributing a Holiday-themed Template! Yay![edit source]
Hey, y'all. It's me, UnTalented, here to wish you a joyous Midvinterblót! Don't forget to offer up your finest stallions and swine as sacrifices to the Norse gods, lest the chill of winter freeze you to the bone. Cheers!
Happy Holidays. --UnTalented 02:16, 19 December 2007 (UTC)
Gerrycheevers wishes you a Happy Solstice! Enjoy the pagan festival of the Northernmost Sunrise! As a special holiday treat, Gerry also is willing to waive the usual offering of blood required in return for this friendly greeting.
Oh, R. Kelly, Oh, R. Kelly
Please do not pee on me
Oh, R. Kelly, Oh, R. Kelly
It would bring me great glee
The DNA, the dirty tape
The the legal fee, the urine rape
Oh, R. Kelly, Oh, R. Kelly
Please do not pee on me.
-R. Kelly Christmas
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Cokehead
Snorts a lot of righteous shit
He wouldn't let poor Santa
Try any of his good weed
All of the other reindeer
Used to snitch and call the cops
Then one foggy christmas eve,
Donner cleared a bowl
He said right to Rudolph's face,
It's got kick and it's got taste
All of the other Reindeer
Fell asleep and then went gay!
-Rudolph the Red-Nosed Cokehead
You are presented with one (1) puppy for your vote for Red Baron. CAUTION: Puppy may contain traces of peanuts. For external use only. Avoid using puppy near open flames. Always use goggles and protective gloves when handling puppy directly. If puppy begins to smoke, seek shelter and cover head.
A little late I know, but thanks for the message on my talk page. Sorry I haven't responded earlier. I just noticed the X-Mas Greetings after archiving my talk page. Thanks again. MadMax 00:56, 8 January 2008 (UTC)
I'm sending you this because you signed up to judge the Poo Lit Surprise. If you no longer want to judge or are incapable of doing so, please tell me as soon as possible. If you're still good to go then here are the instructions:
First, read all of the articles and look at all of the images submitted. Second, judge them. Judge how you like, as long as it's at least fair and based on merit (one suggestion would be to use the Pee Review format). You, as the judges, have the sole authority to pick losers, winners, and disqualify entries, so please read the PLS rules carefully before judging.
Post your top 5 entries here for all categories except the Best T-shirt Design. For the Best T-shirt Design category just say which ones should be t-shirts and which ones should not be t-shirts.
Hit me up on my talk page if you have any questions and thank you again for your valued participation in the balletic train wreck that is the Poo Lit Surprise! --EMC[TALK] 23:28, 27 January 2008 (UTC)
And please inform me why I didn't make it to your list. Pee Review maybe?--Realturka 14:21, 28 January 2008 (UTC)
Thanx, I realise now that it sucks --Realturka 15:39, 29 January 2008 (UTC)
Welcome to UnNews or Better Late Than Never[edit source]
Interesting work on your UnNews audio, but it sounds like you're too close to the mic, or perhaps speaking too loudly at times. May I recommend you read the drivel I've written below.
Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."
Welcome to UnNews, Uncyclopedian Again, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.
I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.
Good things that can happen to you
You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.
What happened to my article?
If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.
Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.
Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?
UnNews Audio
If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.
UnNews UnFunnies
At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found Stripgenerator.com, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.
It's been a while since the yHouse thing, you claimed that the Giver in the check was ME and you were the Receiver? WTFn00b?!1 Also, if you actually buy the house, buy stuff for it in my store located on the Yoinxx page. Seriously. --SirGeneralMinisterG5FIYCUPotM[Y]#21 F@HKUN 09:45, 8 March 2008 (UTC)
Hello, Uncyclopedian Again, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:
I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.
If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, ask an administrator on their talk page or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. Again, welcome! -- TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK 01:24, 17 March 2008 (UTC)
TKF, you didn't have to welcome me. I only forgot my password. Uncyclopedian Again
I figure I should reply here since you might not be checking my talk page. I'd be glad to join in writing season 3. I've actually been looking for a way to become semi-active on the site again, so writing episodes seems like a good way to do so. Is there a main page where discussion on the topic will be taking place? Finnius and I last talked about this over a month ago so I'm a little out of the loop right now. Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 21:39, 19 March 2008 (UTC)
Happy Festivus, from The Led Balloon and Jerry Stiller. Put up your Festivus Pole, air your grievances, and prepare for the feats of strength, for festivus cannot continue until I am pinned! Oh, and merry Christmas if you're into that sort of thing.