User:EricIsOnFire/Archive7
UnSignpost[edit | edit source]
Hi Peasewhizz! If what is currently at User:Sir Peasewhizz/Nothing is a future UnSignpost, then you might want to collaborate with Frosty who is making an issue alone every Friday. Just informing you. Anton (talk) 12:29, 13 August 2014 (UTC)
More {{Boner}}s than a ragged Playgirl: It's the UnSignpost![edit | edit source]
It was dark times being without Uncyclopedia. Maybe if I got out of the dark and went outside once in while it would be less dark. But you know, lazy me.
I plan to visit Uncyclopedia and do my 'thang (wink wink) at least once a week. But I hold no promises because you can't trust me. I'm a hoe and 3!OH!3 told you to NOT TRUST HOES.
However, I'm sure you guys found out why I was absent from the site for a good 200 years 4+ months and it was because my old laptop KOed and I finally got a new one for school.
So that means I won't be uploading images of Madiq. (pictured)...
I missed you, just kidding, but really. However, I didn't forget you, maybe sometimes,
Is this a haiku or something? My grammar sucks too.New admins for you!
By Sir Peasewhizz
Beware everyone, as a result of this there is now an additional 8 new sysops/administrators. They all expect BJS and prizes.
Kip the Dip
Leverage
Supergeeky1
Banzaikitten
Mr-ex777
Colin "All your base" Heaney
Lost Labyrinth
Cat the Colourful
They expect sacrifices. So chop, chop. Make haste.
Biopic This weeks biopic is on someone who doesn't read Uncyclopedia (but they will because we will make them through laughter har har). Her name is Elizabeth and she's from Australia. She showed Sir Peasewhizz her tits...
They were nice. And that is it for today's Biopic. What the fuck did you expect? A fucking biography on the Borgia family?
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week UnBooks:Holmes On Homes (16/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News This just in: Don't hit your children.
Chat Quote
~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) 
~ Fri, Aug 15 '14 20:13 (UTC)
We gave The UnSignpost an enema, so now it's regular![edit | edit source]
By Banzaikitten
Welcome to another no longer sporadic edition of Unsignpost. Yes, the quantity of USP's being written has gone through the roof in the last few weeks and as such there is absolutely nothing to report- hence why people who have previously never written one of these are being roped in. One thing of note that has changed is I am now an admin and as such can block RAHB with impunity. God I love to block RAHB. There is nothing quite like the fizzy rush in the root of your penis and the dizzy thrill you get in your anus when blocking RAHB. I urge all who can to try it.
RAHBs Sexuality
By Banzaikitten
I know I've already spoken about RAHB but god help me I just can't stop. We all like voting and there is a very important vote occuring right now. You, yes you, could decide what sexuality RAHB is. Come the end of the vote RAHB sexuality will be decided for him and he will have to perform sexual acts of that nature for the rest of time. I'm hoping Ponies wins.
Shame on you By the curate
As the curate and the moral compass of this sinful land I must say that I have been appalled at the terrible news that my milkman brought to me. Although I don't remember his exact words, I'll try to reconstruct his speech from my memory, which - and for this I thank God - I am still honored to possess, despite my respectable age.
| “ | Now, I heard Mr What's-his-name talk to his son about something he heard in the neighbor's house, which I didn't hear, but Mr. What's-his-name-again described it so well that I am positive I can repeat it almost word-by-word. So his neighbor was giving his dog its food and commenced discussing our village's events with it, Mrs. Elizabeth soon became the topic of the conversation, and she, as you know, has a daughter... And a cat. Oh, what a fine Siamese cat! But it is of no relation to our current subject. So e man and his pet chattered on and on and, apparently, that dog ... oh, I mean the man (but, you know, from a distance you really can't tell the difference) uttered that "Mrs. Elizabeth's daughter once read an educational page on the Internet, which talked about homosexuality and how you cure it." And can you guess who the author its author was? Mr. Frosty, the man who lives next door to you! | ” |
These were the words of the milkman. However, this isn't all. I was not terrified when I heard this, because teaching fellow villagers to cure an abominable disease, which homosexuality certainly is, is a commendable act from Mr. Frosty's part, especially if it was done with no impulse other than to save good Christians.
Alas, I, we have been greatly deceived in our trust! Beware of the appearances, especially when they are found on the unholy Internet!
Ah, wicked men! I, your curate, willing to help your ungrateful souls, decided to try the so-praised advice of Mr. Frosty on myself and proceeded to accomplish it yesterday. I did everything he said to the very last phrase and - I swear by the Holy Grail - it didn't work! Biopic bakpak2hvy is a guy who frequently lurks on our IRC without saying anything. The other day he said something.
From The Logs
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VFH Highlight Of The Week F4 (13/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News
Chat Quote
[17:16] <Banzaikitten> so I wrote the USP kind of
[17:16] <Banzaikitten> its entirely about RAHB
[17:16] <RAHB> Awesome
~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) ~ Fri, Aug 22 '14 2:13 (UTC)
UnSignpost[edit | edit source]
Wait! Have we delivered an UnSignpost without any images?! Anton (talk) 07:51, 22 August 2014 (UTC)
Hey![edit | edit source]
Thanks for voting to feature Jared Leto on the main page!
~Formerly Annoying Crap 05:42, 26 August 2014
- The one from the Kill, and I thought you died again.
20:23 8.26.14
- The one from the Kill, and I thought you died again.
Thank you![edit | edit source]
Thank you for adding me to Hall of Shame and for giving me credit for the Ernest Hemingway feature! With Hemingway, however, I haven't really contributed to it, and my edits were more of a polishing than additions. Anton (talk) 11:35, 1 September 2014 (UTC)
- By the way, I really like what you are doing with awards, Hall of Shame and Top Tens. Keep it up! Anton (talk) 11:37, 1 September 2014 (UTC)
- No problem. I gave you credit because it would not really have been a feature w/o your polishing imo.
ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:11 9.01.14
- No problem. I gave you credit because it would not really have been a feature w/o your polishing imo.
Thank you as well for adding the Happy Monkey contest feature in the hall of de shame. Isn't it fun to play here? Funnybony once called uncyclopedia a playground for adults, and that's the best descrption I've heard of it yet. Thanks again mon. Aleister 2:07 3=9-14
- Haha ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 00:12 9.04.14
- Haha
OMG! A WILD USP IS ON THE LOOSE![edit | edit source]
By Sir Peasewhizz
Hi, My name is Sir Peasewhizz. Stop throwing tomatoes you assholes! STAHP! READER PLS. STAHP.
Okay, so what is really going on, you may say? 'I'm about to fucking tell you. Enjoy.
Did you know that every ten seconds: another ten seconds kicks in? Yeah, mind equals blown right now, eh? Did you know that the return of one legendary user triggers other legendary users to return as well? When Argylesocks returned from his previous state (not Blue Mountain), it only was a matter of time until the legend named MadMax returned from his couple-of-months-long sojourn in the wild country known as Ethiopia. MadMax does not steal the few supplies of food Ethiopia has, you sick fuck! HE HAS A SOUL.
For those who have heard of the legendary Xamralco, he has returned to. He is an admin and a fantastic writer. We love him. You love. YOU LOVE HIM.
Okay? Okay.
Now if anyone sees Dawg, slap him and tell him to come back. And for Olipro... gosh. I can't even.Vote for highlights, you giant boner goblins.
By Sir Peasewhizz
We were once surpassing the votes per article goal of 10 not much longer than a week ago. SHAME! HOW COULD WE HAVE LET THIS DROP TO NEARLY 5 OUT OF 10?! EVERYBODY, HEADS DOWN!
When I say you can put your heads up, you will all go and vote on the feature nominations. Okay? And no laughing or detention!
Biopic For this edition of your favorite paper, the USP, we had the chance to get the Biopic for one of the biggest badasses to ever live. That person/thingy/chatter was auror, whom we found frolicking in our IRC channel one evening.
When we asked auror if she would like to be Biopic'ed (did I spell that right? SPELL CHECK PLS) she gave a powerful speech.
| “ | no | ” |
Thank you! Give it up for auror!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week Psychedelic Rosie and Her Coat of Many Colors (9/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News The USP will be delivered on Sundays now. (or around then)
Chat Quote
[17:42] <ColinAYB> Kippy is forever topical
[17:42] <ColinAYB> Just like the lotion he uses when he takes it to the hub.
[17:46] <Kippy> You don't even need to see all the nudity to take it to the hub.
SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:17, 7 September 2014 (UTC)
VFH vote[edit | edit source]
Check out your vote change [[1]]. There are two separate nominations for Wittgensetin. This one is NOT userspaced...but you changed your vote on this one. This is in the main space. --ShabiDOO 18:42, 16 September 2014 (UTC)
Unsignpost delivery attempt numbr hideous implosion[edit | edit source]
By Sir Peasewhizz
Hi, My name is Sir Peasewhizz. Stop hurling babies at me! STAHP! READER PLS. STAHP.
It is days like these when I realize what a cruel world we live in. It seems that Pee Review has bitten the dust. For just a few minutes of your day and some cash you can help solve this crisis. Seriously, you hoes.
Piss on my review quests.
Olipro is gay.Vote for highlights, you giant boner goblins.
By Sir PeasewhizzWe were once surpassing the votes per article goal of 10 not much longer than a week ago. SHAME! HOW COULD WE HAVE LET THIS DROP TO NEARLY 5 OUT OF 10?! EVERYBODY, HEADS DOWN!
When I say you can put your heads up, you will all go and vote on the feature nominations. Okay? And no laughing or detention!
Yes, I copied this from the last issue of the USP, you boner goblins. That picture of gold? That was also from the last issue, as well.
Uncyclopedia App
By Anton199
There has recently (a certain amount of time before the latest UnSignpost issue) been a lot of talk about creating an Uncyclopedia App as well as an Uncyclospecies. The idea consists in producing and selling the app which will transform all the human beings who use them into Uncyclopedians. The majority of the users (about 50% of those two who really participated) found this idea great (think that it is funny to talk about) and maybe even began working on it (asked someone else to think about it). Nothing else is known about them, as they disappeared soon after the first experiments were held.
The main problem this project has is that, in fact, nobody knows how to create an app. In addition to this, there is no money, as most of it was spent on Ferraris, that were supposed to bring more money but didn't. Finally, some people think that it might be harmful for the environment (nobody cares).
The project is currently being discussed (some users still post random spam on the forum) and with a certain probability the app is going to be created in nearby future (it is never going be to created but some people do think about it). Biopic Alas, an actual Biopic for SEPTEMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Today, the Biopic will be on a man who carries the identity, MrC. He was doing some hardcore crunches while he was surfing the IRC and thus we gained a little more info this is a run on sentence fuk yea murica.
His origin: "Some Uncyclopedians messed around in another channel recently. After hearing all the stories and rumors, I figured I'd like to see for myself."
So when we asked MrC if he could tell us how to get, how to get to Sesame Street, he said "I don't know... bribe Cookie Monster with a cookie?"
There you have it, words of wisdom BOOI!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week Shirley Phelps-Roper (9/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Hi. This is a lazy edition of the UnSignpost.
Chat Quote
[21:46] Star651 has quit (Quit: Page closed)
[21:46] SirPeasewhizz: NOOOOO
[21:46] SirPeasewhziz: BAE
UnSignpost article - Uncyclopedia App[edit | edit source]
Hi! Just so you know, I really appreciate your effort of keeping the UnSignpost alive. I have a question, though: I wrote the Uncyclopedia app article more than a year ago, so I don't really get how it's relevant right now. But you may have reasons that I'm not aware of. Anton (talk) 11:05, 17 September 2014 (UTC)
- I was filling space. haha ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 21:16 9.17.14
- Filling space?! That's against UnSignpost's standards! UnSignpost never fills the space, the space fills the UnSignpost. Anton (talk) 19:48, 19 September 2014 (UTC)
- Ermagerhd!! ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:33 9.19.14
- Ermagerhd!!
- Filling space?! That's against UnSignpost's standards! UnSignpost never fills the space, the space fills the UnSignpost. Anton (talk) 19:48, 19 September 2014 (UTC)
- I was filling space. haha
Brace Yourselves, The UnSignpost is Coming![edit | edit source]
Previously, in the past, Uncyclopedia has done a project called Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization, which mimics is a battle against crap-quality articles. We recently have finished the colonization of Albert Einstein, because fuck we didn't need a good article on him before amiright?
Vote for highlights, you giant boner goblins. (third issue in a row)
By Sir PeasewhizzWe were once surpassing the votes per article goal of 10 not much longer than a week ago. SHAME! HOW COULD WE HAVE LET THIS DROP TO NEARLY 5 OUT OF 10?! EVERYBODY, HEADS DOWN!
When I say you can put your heads up, you will all go and vote on the feature nominations. Okay? And no laughing or detention!
Wow a third week of using the same entry in a row? GEEZ.
Biopic Nahhh. I don't really feel like it!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week Ludwig Wittgenstein (9/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Please VFH, Colonize, etc.
Chat Quote
[15:07] bakpak2hvy is edible.
[15:07] TheFakeazneD525 chews on bakpak2hvy
My Yu-Gi-Oh! collection[edit | edit source]
You voted for My Yu-Gi-Oh! collection on VFH and it was featured so I guess I can give you one of my cards. Put it in a safe place. It's in mint condition.
Thanks for your vote! --
20:21, 21 September 2014 (UTC)
- I use Mirror Force ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 22:53 9.21.14
- I use Mirror Force
Ummmm[edit | edit source]
This is for the redirects and taking care of the list of featured articles. Adding the article credit was a smashing idea.
I was sorry to hear that your DVD collection was raped last night by a dirty old horney toilet plunger. Thats just not cool :( --ShabiDOO 00:44, 23 September 2014 (UTC)
- I'm lazy though so finishing all the years article credits/featured article tables will take another two years LOL ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 00:45 9.23.14
- I'm lazy though so finishing all the years article credits/featured article tables will take another two years LOL
Antibiotics[edit | edit source]
 |
Thank you for voting |
- We need to categorize all the FAs one day, I can't navigate shit with the big Best Of page. Then again I'm too lazy to sort 2000 pages.--Nikau (talk) 16:44, 23 September 2014 (UTC)
Question[edit | edit source]
Hi again! My question might seem strange to you, but do you have a twin brother? I feel like I might have known you. Anton (talk) 22:38, 26 September 2014 (UTC)
- Yes, I do. Maybe I do know you. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 23:07 9.26.14
- And his name is William? Anton (talk) 09:18, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- no, Dakota. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 17:52 9.27.14
- Really? Then that's a pity (not about your brother's name). I don't know anyone on Uncyclopedia. I am all alone. *sniff* Anton (talk) 18:41, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Well what's your name? Are you from New York? ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 19:06 9.27.14
- Anton. No. Have you ever lived in Paris? Anton (talk) 19:13, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Nope, haha. That's pretty cool that you guessed I was a twin though. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 19:15 9.27.14
- Purely accidental. :) Anton (talk) 19:17, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Haha. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 19:21 9.27.14
- Haha.
- Purely accidental. :) Anton (talk) 19:17, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Nope, haha. That's pretty cool that you guessed I was a twin though.
- Anton. No. Have you ever lived in Paris? Anton (talk) 19:13, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Well what's your name? Are you from New York?
- Really? Then that's a pity (not about your brother's name). I don't know anyone on Uncyclopedia. I am all alone. *sniff* Anton (talk) 18:41, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- no, Dakota.
- And his name is William? Anton (talk) 09:18, 27 September 2014 (UTC)
- Yes, I do. Maybe I do know you.
The USP is coming for you! (and your little dog too)[edit | edit source]
By Sir Peasewhizz
So apparently, October follows September. As we all know, Halloween follows September. This means that I get to make a suggestion, amirite?
So I was thinking long and hard one day (which was literally five minutes not twenty-four hours) about something cool we could do for Halloween this year. No, I don't mean egg your neighbor's house... I was thinking maybe we could feature something on Halloween?
Okay yes, I know this is something we basically do every year, and I know you are reading this preparing to accuse me of filling space... and you'd be right.
Biopic Nahhh. I don't really feel like it!
From The Logs
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VFH Highlight Of The Week UnNews:Obama to outline IS strategy after consulting Stonehenge gods (10/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Please VFH, Colonize, etc.
Chat Quote
<ColinAYB> Actually his lips did sink ships
<ColinAYB> In the sense that he sucked e
Chance to get some feedback...[edit | edit source]
...on this competition. Last Year's was fun. It's not required to give feedback but last year every article got feedback from at least one user. --ShabiDOO 03:08, 29 September 2014 (UTC)
- sounds bangin'. I'll give it a try. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:21 9.29.14
- Competition starts NOW! You have a week. Go here to pick your topic.
- Hey. Extending the competition by three days (giving you over three and a half days to get an article ready). :) --ShabiDOO 08:02, 8 October 2014 (UTC)
- I'm sorry, I just have a lot of school catching up. Thank you, btw. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 10:30 10.08.14
- I'm sorry, I just have a lot of school catching up. Thank you, btw.
- Hey. Extending the competition by three days (giving you over three and a half days to get an article ready). :) --ShabiDOO 08:02, 8 October 2014 (UTC)
- Competition starts NOW! You have a week. Go here to pick your topic.
- sounds bangin'. I'll give it a try.
Firesheep[edit | edit source]
Gerrycheevers was pretty adamant that the text detracted from the article and I was trying to get him to.turn his vote to get it featured more quickly because VFH is dead. Sorry if you felt it turned the feel of the article. I wasn't going to remove the final GIF, but if you want the text back, I've already done it.--Nikau (talk) 00:46, 30 September 2014 (UTC)
- Okay, I'll return the vote back to for. You just earned my respect. Thank you. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 01:10 9.30.14
- Okay, I'll return the vote back to for. You just earned my respect. Thank you.
Awards[edit | edit source]
Would you write something about FYMB for writer of the month? I'd like to update Template:MonthlyAwards because the version on the front page references MAY. Leverage (talk) 09:50, 2 October 2014 (UTC)
- I can this weekend if you unprotect the template. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 21:15 10.02.14
- I can this weekend if you unprotect the template.
Excuse me, sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, the USP?[edit | edit source]
As we all know, a Texan man has brought the Ebola virus to the United States of America. And as country, we are all freaking out. Even Obama, who never freaks out, has freaked out. He now refuses to kiss Michelle because he has become a germophobe.
Anywho, we here at Uncyclopedia have determined that Ebola can be avoided by simple measures. We encourage everyone to wash their hands, especially after ferocious masturbation. Remember kids, diseases come for hookers. So stay away from hookers as well.
Biopic Nahhh. I don't really feel like it again!
From The Logs
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VFH Highlight Of The Week Firesheep (10/1)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Shabidoo's competition has begun.
Chat Quote
<Denza252> ephemey: am i trololololololing?
UnDebate:Should women rap?[edit | edit source]
First of all, thanks for the UnSignpost! I thought about writing an article today, but I don't have much time. Expect something from me next week, instead!
On the topic of the VFH nomination, thanks for your opinion! Sometimes, when you read an article, you don't know what's wrong with it, but you just have a feeling that it can't be a feature. So I understand what you meant by your vote. Still, I finished working on it quite recently and can't think of any moments or jokes which I could improve. Could you, please, help me by pointing out what you think needs more work? I would be very obliged! Anton (talk) 13:31, 5 October 2014 (UTC)
- I mean, it is funny but I just couldn't really vote for because the article was pretty slowly developed in the beginning. I feel like the beginning bits lack the feature quality. In this case, humor. I don't know, maybe it's just me. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 01:35 10.06.14
- I mean, it is funny but I just couldn't really vote for because the article was pretty slowly developed in the beginning. I feel like the beginning bits lack the feature quality. In this case, humor. I don't know, maybe it's just me.
User:Mattsnow/World War II[edit | edit source]
Feel free to add to it, a whole bunch of people participated to it. I did the (huge) table on the right, but the text on the left was done by numerous people. It would be great if the text could go longer than the table! (It doesn't on my PC anyway~). I'm writing a collab for the next week or so, then I'll tend to the WW2 article. Cheers! 
Mattsnow 17:44, 8 October 2014 (UTC)
- I'll probably add to it this weekend. I'm studying WWII right now. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 19:34 10.08.14
- Eh cool coincidence. :) lol Captain crunch, definitely an idea to expand on haha
Mattsnow 19:55, 8 October 2014 (UTC)
- Lol I feel like Captain Crunch would be a naval officer. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:05 10.08.14
- Lol I feel like Captain Crunch would be a naval officer.
- Eh cool coincidence. :) lol Captain crunch, definitely an idea to expand on haha
- I'll probably add to it this weekend. I'm studying WWII right now.
My hair[edit | edit source]
Thanks for pee reviewing! As you know, it's very short, so I put it up for pee review for help expanding. Could you please leave me any ideas?--EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 14:37, 14 October 2014 (UTC)
- Yeah my week may be busy though I've got schoolwork. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 18:52 10.14.14
- Yeah my week may be busy though I've got schoolwork.
Cleaning up V8 Supercars[edit | edit source]
What do you recommend? It's kind of a zombie article pulled together from half of an old VFD loser written by other people years ago and half new stuff. --Nikau (talk) 04:23, 16 October 2014 (UTC)
- Well, I cleaned it up.--Nikau (talk) 08:15, 16 October 2014 (UTC)
- I can't really get into cars anyway. I'll vote for because I trust you know what you are doing. (I know very little about cars besides which ones are kickass) ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 21:30 10.16.14
- I can't really get into cars anyway. I'll vote for because I trust you know what you are doing. (I know very little about cars besides which ones are kickass)
Gangnam style[edit | edit source]
Thanks for your explanation! It doesn't alter my objections however. The reference is still pointless, doesn't mean anything to non-Uncyclopedians reading it and (!) it's in a featured article! In addition, this is an outdated inside joke, which means that many current active users won't get it as well. So, please, check the rest of the article and see for yourself whether the funny text should be spoiled by a phrase a lot of people won't get, and there is a good chance that those who will aren't going to read it in any nearby future! Anton (talk) 20:22, 18 October 2014 (UTC)
- Alright, valid point. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 02:19 10.19.14
- Alright, valid point.
dicks lol: It's UnSignpost time![edit | edit source]
By Sir Peasewhizz
Do u think we should cancel the USP
Anyone
Biopic Nahhh. I don't really feel like it againnn!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week UnDebate:Should women rap? (10/0)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Shabidoo's competition has ended.
Chat Quote None
Pee Reviews[edit | edit source]
I'm working on them. I should have them done soon (hopefully). -- 23:14, 22 October 2014 (UTC)
- That's awesome! ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:20 10.23.14
- That's awesome!
Solar flares[edit | edit source]
You helped to get solar flares featured. As a reward, here's a dope picture of a solar flare. You can totally make it your desktop background or something.
Thanks for your vote! -- 01:06, 23 October 2014 (UTC)
- No problem and oooo shinny ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:21 10.23.14
- No problem and oooo shinny
Yo[edit | edit source]
You can remove this notice at any time by removing the {{Talkback}} or {{Tb}} template.
~ BB ~ (T) 
~ Tue, Oct 28 '14 10:15 (UTC)
An old classic[edit | edit source]
Thanks[edit | edit source]
I haven't checked the Fork recently so thanks for adding Antoninus Pius to my Hall of Shame entry. --
RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 16:10, 2 November 2014 (UTC)
- It's no biggy. You're welcome. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 23:56 11.02.14
- And also for keeping record of the featured articles of 2014. By the way, I intend to write WW2 with Nikau, is it OK? If we mix 3 styles of writing, it will be chaos. :) Mattsnow 11:29, 4 November 2014 (UTC)
- Only if you keep the Captain Crunch the Australian Naval Commander and his ancestor Frosty is gay joke. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 00:51 11.05.14
- OK lol Mattsnow 12:28, 5 November 2014 (UTC)
- YAY ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 21:48 11.05.14
- YAY
- OK lol
- Only if you keep the Captain Crunch the Australian Naval Commander and his ancestor Frosty is gay joke.
- And also for keeping record of the featured articles of 2014. By the way, I intend to write WW2 with Nikau, is it OK? If we mix 3 styles of writing, it will be chaos. :)
More overdue than my library books: Those pee reviews[edit | edit source]
I'm finishing them up tonight. Check for them tomorrow morning. Sorry I've been so late with those. -- 21:18, 8 November 2014 (UTC)
The UnSignpost is back, baby! (And also a little bit of front)[edit | edit source]
By Sir Peasewhizz
Before time began there was the cube. Wait, hold on... yeah wrong script. Okay, let's start again. Before the internet was cool, there was no Uncyclopedia. This is because before Uncyclopedia was a website, there was this awful site for information that anybody could edit called Wikipedia. There was also catfishes and cocks.
That all changed back in 2005. When Uncyclopedia was established/founded/spawned/born/emerged/created, the internet took off. Not literally, but metaphorically... or something. The fact remains that the world, with the introduction of Unyclopedia, began to gain faith in the internet. The Amish began to use electricity after Uncyclopedia was established!
And our legacy could fade away; not unlike my basketball trick shot.
All jokes aside, Uncyclopedia may be content-free, as one could say, but it is not free to run. Uncyclopedia runs on a server and this requires money. We don't mean like the billions Obama requires, but it still needs a bit of money to be a legendary thing.
How does Wikipedia stay up then? Well, we're not Wikipedia. We're run by no employees and we're instead run by dedicated users who spend their time editing/fucking with the site that they love. Uncyclopedia is nearly ten years old, so it's not like the joy of "uncyclopediating" isn't real. It's in the Webster Dictionary.
Not every one is rich either, in fact, we're all kinda bland. Money doesn't grow on trees. Now we're not gonna hold you for ransom and we sure as hell aren't going to guilt you into donating to our cause... but think about the children that would starve without us!
Basically, read more about it here. Thanks for your time.
If you can't donate, don't. We won't force you to do something we can't ourselves.
And another thing you could do besides donate is spread the word or buy something from our store.
Anyone
Biopic You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it! You a fool? I wouldn't do another biopic if I felt like it!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week President Hoover (11/1)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Donate to Uncyclopedia if you can.
Chat Quote None.
Pee for Sydney[edit | edit source]
(late) thank you for that. It confirmed my suspicions that making a city/town article funny is very hard. I'm trying to make it more general and funnier rather than references to local shit. --Nikau (talk) 08:09, 9 November 2014 (UTC)
- I see. You're welcome. It was a decent way to attack it but it wasn't the best way imho ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:02 11.12.14
- Well, I changed it up quite a bit now. --Nikau (talk) 09:00, 13 November 2014 (UTC)
- I'll read it tonight ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 10:40 11.13.14
- I'll read it tonight
- Well, I changed it up quite a bit now. --Nikau (talk) 09:00, 13 November 2014 (UTC)
- I see. You're welcome. It was a decent way to attack it but it wasn't the best way imho
Your sig[edit | edit source]
Is awesome, I was wondering if you could add some shade to mine? If you don't want to I won't be offended. It would be good to have a little improvement on it after 3 years of using it, and unfortunately, I'm a total shit at formatting. Mattsnow 02:55, 12 November 2014 (UTC)
- Thanks but I didn't make it. I believe Aleister made this one. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:01 11.12.14
- A shame this SOB is not around :( Mattsnow 03:30, 12 November 2014 (UTC)
- I know! What a douche! SOMEONE CALL SQUILLIAM FANCYSON! ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:38 11.12.14
- EXACTLY! Mattsnow 03:44, 12 November 2014 (UTC)
- BAZINGA! ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:12 11.12.14
- BAZINGA!
- EXACTLY!
- I know! What a douche! SOMEONE CALL SQUILLIAM FANCYSON!
- A shame this SOB is not around :(
Re-feature queue[edit | edit source]
I see you added The Popularity of War under Sog's section. Were you just picking a random article because I asked Sog to pick one on his talkpage and was gonna wait like a week to see if he replied. -- 22:03, 17 November 2014 (UTC)
- OHHH... ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 01:30 11.18.14
- It's fine. I'll remove it for now and see if Sog replies. --
01:37, 18 November 2014 (UTC)
- It's fine. I'll remove it for now and see if Sog replies. --
- OHHH...
christmas song[edit | edit source]
Vocals are trickling in (from all over the world) but the more the merrier. Would you be willing/able to rock the mic and lay down some phat NYC vocals? Leverage (talk) 21:39, 8 December 2014 (UTC)
- Maybe show me what you got in mind for lyrics. My accent is upstate so it's not heavy though. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 01:16 12.09.14
- I mean this track dude. UnTunes:Do Islamic State Know It's Christmas?. I want as many uncyclopedians on there as possible! Leverage (talk) 07:29, 9 December 2014 (UTC)
- Maybe show me what you got in mind for lyrics. My accent is upstate so it's not heavy though.
This isn't really my place to ask, but[edit | edit source]
are you going to write this "Life is a bitch" thing for The Aristocrat's? --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 00:43, 15 December 2014 (UTC)
- No, I actually don't have the time. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 00:59 12.16.14
- Aw that sucks. --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 17:12, 18 December 2014 (UTC)
- Damn school! ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 19:56 12.21.14
- Damn school!
- Aw that sucks. --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 17:12, 18 December 2014 (UTC)
- No, I actually don't have the time.
You're leaving? :([edit | edit source]
I'll be sad to see you go. Good luck in the cruel, dangerous, and far too bright place we call outdoors. -- 23:00, 3 January 2015 (UTC)
- I'll
probably make a few edits here and there and then make a comeback in the summer and then leave againhave to deal with all this end of my high school/going into college portion of my life. It's just I don't have time for Uncyclopedia like I use to and I don't wanna go out without notice. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:08 1.04.15
- I get that. Good luck with everything and have fun in college! :) -- 03:52, 4 January 2015 (UTC)
- I still have two years left of high school :P I just have no time for shizz and stuff. but thanks. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 07:00 1.04.15
- Oh lol. -- 17:45, 4 January 2015 (UTC)
- Pease, I will miss seeing you on recent changes and on VFH and on other many pages where you could be seen before! You did a great job for Uncyclopedia, and I hope Uncyclopedia responded to you in the same way. Best of luck with your education and all the things you'll do later in life! Anton (talk) 17:36, 5 January 2015 (UTC)
- Oh lol. --
- I still have two years left of high school :P I just have no time for shizz and stuff. but thanks.
- I get that. Good luck with everything and have fun in college! :) --
Vote, Vote, Vote[edit | edit source]
It's that time of the year again! We're going to be showing off our Top Ten Articles of 2014 soon but so far, very few people have voted. It's all up to you to decide what's the best of the best! Go to Forum:Top 10 Articles of 2014 and vote now! -- 02:21, 30 January 2015 (UTC)
Top 10[edit | edit source]
Hi Peasewhizz! Thanks for making this year's Top 10 image. I really like so will you allow me to use its version edited by Xamralco on the other Uncyclopedia? Anton (talk) 17:53, 6 February 2015 (UTC)
Gone?[edit | edit source]
I saw you came back from the dead to add to add a vote to the VFH of my Attack of the Clones article. Would it be possible for you to perhaps add a little more content and humor to it, or are you retired for good?--EpicWinner (talk) 01:25, 3 November 2015 (UTC)
- Didn't I write that or did I do the Phantom Menace? I don't remember. Just kidding, but seriously. But I was checking in. I'm like the retired teacher who keeps showing up as a substitute. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 20:17 11.10.15
- Didn't I write that or did I do the Phantom Menace? I don't remember. Just kidding, but seriously. But I was checking in. I'm like the retired teacher who keeps showing up as a substitute.
Remember when people used to be active at least once a year?[edit | edit source]
Super awesome happy "Seven deadly sins" competition where Shabidoo will win and everyone else colapses into suicidal depression fun week!!! SIGN UP!!! ShabiDOO 14:18, 15 May 2016 (UTC)
Help[edit | edit source]
Would it be possible for you (or someone else) to add more stuff to the article Cyberchase? I'm guessing since you're like 18, you were young enough to have grown up with that show and may be able to add more.--Abacab (talk) 20:55, 1 July 2016 (UTC)
- Yeah I could look at it this weekend and next week. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 15:16 7.06.16
- Yeah I could look at it this weekend and next week.
When exactly?--Abacab (talk) 05:46, 10 July 2016 (UTC)
- Hmmm... not sure I remember this show. I may not be able to help now that I've looked at it. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:07 7.11.16
- Hmmm... not sure I remember this show. I may not be able to help now that I've looked at it.
Thank you for voting for Noble gases[edit | edit source]
DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 01:57, 1 October 2016 (UTC)
- I got your back on any day that ends in y. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 21:04 10.02.16
- I got your back on any day that ends in y.
Wikia[edit | edit source]
Can you bring some of your articles (like Mila Kunis) over to Wikia?--Abacab (talk) 01:50, 24 November 2016 (UTC)
- I don't fuck with the Wikia tbh. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:57 12.07.16
- Ugh. I looked at recent changes on wikia. Have you read the standardized message the resident fuck-face leaves on new user's talk pages? Systemetised bullying and assholetry. Breaks my heart. ShabiDOO 02:54, 8 December 2016 (UTC)
- What's wrong with the standard Welcome message? I don't see any bullying in it. Besides, the Uncyc guide to writing funny stuff, HTBFANJS, was named "How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid", long before the sites split apart. As to "assholetry", there is far more of that at Wikipedia. Though I did notice a slightly grouchy lecture about making lists, after the welcome message. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:25, 8 December 2016 (UTC)
- Tru. ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 04:11 12.12.16
- There is a big difference between a humerous guide to writing with useful tips and a snarky narrative ... than Spike's hostile bitchy finger-pointing your-shit-is-garbage messages...threatening a block from the very beginning and actively calling their first edit crap. I am utterly dismayed SimslikeSims that you and Romartus think that's an intelligent way to retain new talent. Just how long does the average new editor stick around? Every three months or so I check out the page and all of the edits are the three admins and a couple new editors I've never seen before. Considering there are a whole 20 edits a day there now and almost all the edits being by resident-asshole and a few more by the crats and then some new users I've never heard of (who will unlikely stick around for long) ... it breaks my heart. ShabiDOO 15:25, 22 January 2017 (UTC)
- There real question is when does Kingdom Hearts 3 come out??
- There is a big difference between a humerous guide to writing with useful tips and a snarky narrative ... than Spike's hostile bitchy finger-pointing your-shit-is-garbage messages...threatening a block from the very beginning and actively calling their first edit crap. I am utterly dismayed SimslikeSims that you and Romartus think that's an intelligent way to retain new talent. Just how long does the average new editor stick around? Every three months or so I check out the page and all of the edits are the three admins and a couple new editors I've never seen before. Considering there are a whole 20 edits a day there now and almost all the edits being by resident-asshole and a few more by the crats and then some new users I've never heard of (who will unlikely stick around for long) ... it breaks my heart. ShabiDOO 15:25, 22 January 2017 (UTC)
- Tru.
- What's wrong with the standard Welcome message? I don't see any bullying in it. Besides, the Uncyc guide to writing funny stuff, HTBFANJS, was named "How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid", long before the sites split apart. As to "assholetry", there is far more of that at Wikipedia. Though I did notice a slightly grouchy lecture about making lists, after the welcome message. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:25, 8 December 2016 (UTC)
- I don't fuck with the Wikia tbh.
Happy Monkey Competition 2021[edit | edit source]
Hey its HAPPY MONKEY TIME 2021 (Feb 21-28). Your favourite writing competition where we write articles on one another's suggested topics. Go ahead and sign up because the more users we have competiting the more ridonculously fun it is. If you don't wanna write you can sign up to judge! Sing up here. Remember it's not about writing a sure fire VFH article, but pushing the limits of your originality and creativity and spitting out an article on a topic you had never thought about writing before. Also...Shabidoo will love you forever and owe you like a zillion favours for it. He will literally do anything to please you if it means you participate. Happy Monkey Farts!!! ShabiDOO 15:32, 10 February 2021 (UTC)
UnSignpost Home Delivery for May 1st, 2021[edit | edit source]
"Vandalism, eh? Fuck off already," they said, whilst throwing bags of feces at our new dumpyard.
Vote for Sandwiches: Triple Resignation, Quintuple the Drama
By Cassie
Following the resignation of two of our longtimemost bureaucrats, EMC and Zombiebaron, in addition to the resignation of admin CandidToaster, a new wave rejuvenated much of the now-ancient television show Vote for Sandwiches. MrX and Hipponias quickly climbed the ranks; Shabidoo received the same treatment, but ultimately withdrew. Zana Dark and JJPMaster were both nominated for a new category, interface operator, instead of the traditional sandwich role granted.
Uncyclopedia's Technologies are Finally Modernized
By Cassie
it has been a long time in the making, but Uncyclopedia's editing technologies have finally been optimized for the new decade. An introduction of a new extended-confirmed protection level has enabled famous articles, such as AAAAAAAAA!, to see the light of commoners' editing again. Utilities such as Huggle, RedWarn, CurateThisPage, autoarchiving, and a lot more has been implemented thanks to JJPMaster. Many gnomes have been working on this; as such, please treat their work with respect!
Biopic
This edition's biopic is about the joy of templating. Templating is a fine art which can be practiced on Uncyclopedia, its parody Wikipedia, and so many other places. It can furthermore be expanded to "module coding", which produces the same stuff albeit in a much more efficient and dynamic way. Come try templating now!
From The Logs
Top VFH Competitors
VFH Highlight Of The Week COVID-19 (6/1)
From The Forums
UnSignpost News Following 1.5+ years of hiatus, Cassie has taken the lead, in a unilateral albeit undramatic manner, and has designated themselves as the lead editor of the UnSignpost.
Chat Quote
Supergeeky1: 
Boner.
It's beginning to look a lot like…[edit | edit source]
Up for grabs is the coveted Clark Griswold Award for Holiday Cheer. Who will be crowned Holiday Victor?
Seasons Greetings!
It's that special time of year. A wonderful time for friends and family to rejoice in gaiety. Not you! You usually spend all of your hard-earned money on gifts for them, and now you just want to hibernate until your finances recuperate. Well, here at Uncyclopedia, entering our newest competition won't cost you a penny — Sign Up Today! (pretty please) – 
(ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 13:32, 13 December 2021