Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Queen Anne's Revenge (again)
Queen Anne's Revenge [edit source]
I was in the middle of reviewing this in a Word Document when Everyotherusernamewastaken reviewed it so I guess I'll post my review here. --
05:00, 9 November 2014 (UTC)
| Humour: | 6 | It has its moments but it’s very choppy. I see what you were trying to do and I’ll get more into detail about that in the concept section. For now, I’ll just address the jokes.
There seems to be a lot of sex jokes, which is fine, but if you want to make it about sex, don’t just mention sex stuff periodically. The sex jokes are too common to be a one-time gag but aren’t plentiful enough to make it the theme. They just sort of seem out of place with the rest of the stuff. The same goes for the various mentions of “Fuck you.” They don’t really make sense in the context of Blackbeard’s ship, which seems more like a dry topic. However, this doesn’t mean that there aren’t good lines in the article. Lines like “She was captured by the Canadian army in 1711. The army was two-men strong.” are pretty good satire, and I think you should focus more on that kind of stuff than on references to blowjobs or Captain Obvious, which are pretty over used. |
| Concept: | 6 | I see that you sporked most of the article from Wikipedia, which totally has potential, but sometimes what you put in seems a little random. I think you need to think of a more cohesive theme for the article (ie: Do you want it to be about Blackbeard and Queen Anne having sex, do you want it to be a satire of Canada, etc.) It definitely works the way it is, but I think it has a lot more potential if you focus on just one these ideas. |
| Prose and formatting: | 9 | Grammar and spelling check out, although it can be choppy as I said before. |
| Images: | 5 | MS Paint can definitely be used in a funny way, however I think it’s a little out of place here. Given the tone of the article, perhaps a picture of Blackbeard would be more appropriate since the article seems to focus on him. However, if you want to keep the picture, I would advise putting something in the article about how the cannons were used to defeat another ship or something so that it relates more directly with the text. |
| Miscellaneous: | 6.5 | Average of scores. |
| Final Score: | 32.5 | Overall, good job. It was a bit choppy, but I was thoroughly entertained throughout. Keep working on it and I think it’s gonna be awesome! :) |
| Reviewer: | 05:01, 9 November 2014 (UTC)
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